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Dynasty 5/31/2019

 

(EAW Intro Plays)

(Dynasty’s new theme song, “P.A.T.” by Denzel Curry plays as the show begins. The camera opens to an aerial shot of the packed sold out Staples Center as the rabid fans can be seen holding signs and screaming in excitement for the show ahead. Shots of the Pain for Pride sign hanging near the rafters are also shown as well as the countdown on the titantron that reads “21 DAYS”. It then pans to the commentary table.)

Stew-O: It’s the final day of the month of positivity as we inch closer and closer to the year’s biggest show, the pinnacle of wrestling, the mecca of the culture, the culmination of the season… Pain for Pride! And when I tell you that tensions are at an all time high I feel like I’m shortchanging how things are unfolding here on Dynasty! Nonetheless I’m Stew-O here with my partner Flannery McCoy and we are back to a two-man booth as Talib Bari has moved onto greener pastures.

Flannery McCoy: Unfortunately, but the show must go on! Tonight we have another exciting episode lined up as we see a MONUMENTAL main event match up with two men who will be competing in the Pain for Pride main event, Darkane takes on Mr. DEDEDE for the first time ever. You have the Graveworm and Gawdzilla, two men who look to walk out of Atlanta with the gold, and two men who have had a long standing issue with one another despite never going toe to toe in that ring… but it all comes full circle tonight! We also have Theron Nikolas addressing the crowd tonight as he claims he is going to “put the nail in the coffin” of The 1% so that should be interesting.

Stew-O: Indeed it should, I personally can’t wait to get started!

(The camera pan to Stephie Love in the ring)

Stephie Love: This contest is scheduled for one fall and is a triple threat match!

(“Battle of One” by 30 Seconds to Mars plays as out steps Dante Lebeau. He stands at the top of the ramp and poses as the fans give a slight cheer for the newcomer.)

Stephie Love: On his way to the ring…from Montreal, Quebec…weighing 190lbs…DANTE LEBEAU!!

Flannery McCoy: One of the new influx of talents in EAW, Dante is a Canadian with a bright future. The sky’s the limit for this kid!

(Dante slides in the ring and runs around a bit trying to rally the crowd. As his music fades out, “Nuketown” by Ski Mask the Slump God blares out and out comes Zachary Rod. Zachary begins dancing on the stage as he grabs everyone’s attention before walking down the ramp.)

Stephie Love: Next, from Detroit, Michigan…weighing 202 LBS…ZACHARY ROD!!!

Stew-O: Another newcomer but a lot older than his opponent, Zachary Rod is ready to catapult himself in to a upper echelon in EAW as we draw closer to Pain for Pride!

(Rod enters the ring and dances some more before his theme music fades out. Both Rod and Lebeau stand in the ring waiting as “Fatality” by OCTiv blasts and the fans begin to instantly boo. Out comes Ronan Malosi with a scowl on his face and the most serious glare to him that catches both Rod and Dante off guard.)

Stephie Love: AND FINALLY, on his way to the ring…from Cape Town, South Africa…weighing 230 pounds…THE JUGGERNAUT…RONAN MALOSI!!!

Stew-O: This man has a fierceness that his opponents need to be worried about. There is no compassion in his eyes as he storms to the ring. Zachary was dancing, Dante seemed excited…but Ronan has bad intentions in each step he takes.

Flannery McCoy: The Juggernaut is another New face but he has two months over both men here in the big leagues.

(Ronan rolls in the ring and stares down both men standing opposite of him.)

DING! DING!

Stew-O: Ronan rolls his neck and stares at both Rod and Dante as they turn and stare at each other. Rod motions for Dante to come over as both men start talking briefly. Ronan takes a deep breath and waits as…

Flannery McCoy: Are…yeah, they are playing Rock Paper Scissors! Rod and Dante are playing Rock, Paper, Scissors!

Stew-O: Zach wins the first game with scissors beating paper!

Flannery McCoy: They start again as Dante wins this time with Rock beating scissors!

Stew-O: One last game and both men draw Paper! They go again…both men draw paper again! One last time and…

BAM!!

Flannery McCoy: Both men draw Ronan as the Juggernaut floors both his opponents running clotheslines!

Stew-O: Malosi was tired of the fun and games and is getting down to business! Ronan drags Zachary to his feet, scoops him up, POWERSLAM ON TO DANTE LEBEAU! Ronan rolls Zachary off of Dante, he drags LeBeau up and CHOKESLAM! HE CHOKESLAMS HIM DIRECTLY ON TO ROD! BOTH MEN ARE LOOKING BROKEN!

Flannery McCoy: Ronan roars loudly as the fans begin booing him for his relentless effort.

Stew-O: Ronan stomps away at both bodies before dragging Rod to the middle of the ring. He grabs him by the neck and lifts him up high and holds him in the air, his feet dangling helplessly! Ronan let’s him go as he lands on his feet. Ronan runs and goes bouncing off the ropes as Rod stands their groggy.

Flannery McCoy: STIFF RUNNING EUROPEAN UPPERCUT!

Stew-O: Rod is sent flying across the ring as Malosi gets up and checks on Dante. Lebeau is up but RUNNING EUROPEAN UPPERCUT FROM RONAN! Dante is down gain!

Flannery McCoy: Malosi is living up to the name Juggernaut as he is destroying both men. Malosi forces Dante to his feet and scoops him on to his shoulders. Zachary Rod is up! He charges and…

BAM!!

Stew-O: RONAN SWINGS DANTE AROUND AND LEBEAU’S LEG CRACKS ZACHARY ROD IN THE MOUTH!

Flannery McCoy: Ronan looks unstoppable as Rod rolls out of the ring and on to the arena floor. Ronan is torturing Dante and

Stew-O: FIREMAN’S CARRY IN TO AN EMERALD FLOWSION!

Flannery McCoy: MY GOD HE FOLDED DANTE UP LIKE AN ACCORDION!

Stew-O: Ronan stomps to the corner! This match is over but he isn’t satisfied finishing it just yet! Dante is out but Rod rolls back in the ring! He just won’t stay down! Ronan sees this and changes Rod to his target! Rod is confused and turns as Ronan charges!

Flannery McCoy: LISA! THE STIFF BROGUE KICK KNOCKS ROD’S BLOCK OFF!

Stew-O: Rod is out cold in the middle of the ring! Ronan gets up as he sees Dante getting up as well! Ronan charges him and locks him up! He drags his hand around his throat! HE FLOATS HIM HIGH IN THE AIR WITH ONE HAND!

Flannery McCoy: DEATH RO! DEATH RO! Choke slam in to a back breaker as Dante collapses right next to Zachary Rod! Both men are flat on their backs as Ronan stares down at his fallen foes!

Stew-O: Ronan looks at the crowd as he looks st them pumping his pecs and shaking his head.

Ronan Malosi: ROOOOOOAR!!!

Flannery McCoy: Ronan puts one foot on Rod and another foot on Dante as both men lay out cold with their shoulders on the mat!

Ref: ONE!!!

TWO!!!

THREE!!!

DING!! DING!! DING!!

(“Fatality” by OCTiv plays as fans boo relentlessly. Ronan hops off both men and gets his arm raised by the referee.)

Stephie Love: AND YOUR WINNER…ROOOOOONAN MALOOOOOOSI!

Stew-O: Pure dominance!

Flannery McCoy: You can say that again!

Stew-O: Pure dominance! Utter destruction as Zachary Rod and Dante Lebeau lay out cold in the middle of the ring! Ronan took out two men quickly here tonight and maybe he stands out of the pack of newer talents in EAW with this caliber of a win!

Flannery McCoy: Ronan looks to be a monster who needs to be taken seriously because he simply toyed with two grown men here and won this match without getting hit once!

(A recap of last week’s Dynasty airs showing StarrStan making the announcement of Mark Michaels being named the number one contender to the PURE Championship after weeks of tirades.)

(We open up backstage as we see Michael Belfort sitting down and facing a person off camera. His pre video chatter concludes as he turns and speaks to the audience.)

Michael Belfort: Hello ladies and gentlemen and I’m here backstage to have a sit down interview with a woman who is walking in to this year’s Pain for Pride with more than just pride on the line. Set to face Mark Michaels in single’s competition with her highly coveted title on the line, please welcome…EAW PURE CHAMPION…Ms. Extreme!

(The camera widens as we see Ms. Extreme sitting with her legs crossed and her Pure Championship in her lap. The fans go crazy inside the arena as Belfort speaks.)

Michael Belfort: How are you this evening?

Ms. Extreme: I’m fine all things considered. I’m just 100% ready to get to Pain for Pride 12 and shut this loud mouth’s face closed for good.

Michael Belfort: Since you brought him up, how are you feeling about this match up with Mark Michaels at Pain For Pride 12? Starrstan relented and gave Mark something he believes he wanted and that was a match with you for that Pure Championship. Do you believe he deserves it or do you believe Starrstan made a mistake with this match?

Ms. Extreme: Well, Mark Michaels has a win over me prior to this. A cheap, cheap win but a win nonetheless. Many people, including my own sister, have disputed and debunked the validity of this victory in the past but the delusional Mark Michaels clearly ignores the truth. The truth is he may feel like this is what he wants, Starrstan may think giving him this match is what will stop him from causing chaos and running roughshod all over Dynasty, but to say he deserves another shot…that isn’t for me to judge. But to be frank, Mark Michaels probably doesn’t deserve this shot at this Pure Championship. Do you remember what I did to him at Ides of March?

Michael Belfort: I think we all remember that match, Camile.

Ms. Extreme: So, when you asked me about deserved he may have deserved a shot back then. But now? Yea, I don’t know about that. But, he’s got it. He has a shot at this Pure Championship again and it will be at the grandest stage of them all. He’s been looking to solidify himself and his hatred for Elite Answers Wrestling and what better way to do that? You beat me at the biggest show of all time! You got the Extreme face of Elite Answers Wrestling with the Pure Championship Gold around her waist and the chance to make true on all of the noise he’s been spewing this past season. Mark has been running his mouth, sneak attacking people, and been an obvious nuisance to everyone on Dynasty. Do you think Jamie O’Hara thinks he deserves this shot? Do you think Starrstan really believes Mark Michaels earned this shot at Pain for Pride? Regardless, he has it and I have him. After it’s all said and done, I’ll still have this.

(Ms. Extreme lifts her Pure Championship up so all can see as the gold shimmers in the lights.)

Ms. Extreme: Point, blank, period! I’m the one who has held this title for five months and counting. He’s the one claiming he deserves this? Nah! As I walk with my head held high I can’t be the only one thinking of the importance of this match to not just Mark and myself. I went from thinking I may not wrestle to not only doing so this season, but holding championship gold. Mark got hurt and came back crying about EAW owing him something. The parallels are there but the comparisons aren’t fair. I deal with setbacks and embrace them while others use them as excuses. I’m the one the fans are cheering for and looking to as an inspiration each and every week. I’m the one inching closer and closer to breaking the record many didn’t expect me to break. You wanna know the secret? I AM going to break the record!

Michael Belfort: Big words! What about tonight? You face one third of The Score and-

Ms. Extreme: So? Is it all of them facing me? No? Just Jason? Well, he’s a joke and so were Ryan and Shaker. I’m taking him seriously but not like I plan on taking Mark Michaels. But, I look as this week as my chance to kill of The Score and be done with them once and for all. Clear the deck and clear my head as I push forward towards history.

Michael Belfort: This is true! As Theron Nikolas looks to have the longest Answers World Championship reign of all time, you will be the longest Pure Champion in EAW history before PFP!

Ms. Extreme: Yes. Yet, Theron is the one we promote as the groundbreaking, history making performer and I get it. He is the AWC title holder and will be in the main event of Pain for Pride XII. That doesn’t negate or undervalue my accomplishments. That shouldn’t dampen by historic reign with this belt. Nor will I allow it to do so. I may not main event PFP but this title defense will be one for everyone to remember. This win will be another one for the history books as I carve my name in as the greatest to ever hold this title. Plus, it gets to be another loss I put on top of the Ides of March loss I served Mark! But first, I have to beat Jason.

Michael Belfort: Jason McKormick will be a tough opponent this week and I’m sure you are as prepared as you need to be for this fight. But, say you lose to him this week…how does that affect your mindset going in to Pain for Pride with that Pure title up for grabs?

Ms. Extreme: I’ve taken losses and bounced back every time, Michael. I’ve lost matches this season and throughout my EAW career. Make no mistake about it, this isn’t me being cocky when I speak how I’m speaking. I’m just confident because I have been the one with a literally chip in my shoulder since January. I’m the one that walks in to every match knowing that the person I’m facing gets a different boosts if they beat me then they get when facing someone else. Im the one who has to be weary of all challengers and opponents being the Pure Champion. I’m the one who-

???: AHH BULLSHIT!

(Ms. Extreme and Michael quickly turn their heads as they both look out the corner of the interview area.)

Michael Belfort: LOOK OUT!!!

(A FOLDING CHAIR COMES FLYING IN TO FRAME AS MS. EXTREME AND MICHAEL BELFORT BOTH DUCK. Ms Extreme stands up and lays her belt on the ground as Belfort flees the scene. In walks Mark Michaels with an angry expression, looking as intense as possible. Michaels is huffing and puffing as Ms Extreme stands in a stance showing she is ready for a fight.)

Ms. Extreme: What’s up? Want to do this now? Huh? Fuck is your problem?!

Mark Michaels: YOU KNOW WHAT I WANT!

Ms. Extreme: You throwing chairs and shit well, I’M RIGHT HERE! DON’T THROW CHAIRS! THROW ME! CMON!

Mark Michaels: YOU…

(Mark looks down and sees what he wants. He picks up the Pure Championship and clutches it as Ms Extreme looks at him with disgust.)

Mark Michaels: YOU! You are what I want! The Pure Championship! The heartbreaking silence of the crowd after I take it away from their beloved champion. The weeping tears of children who would love nothing more than to see you stay with her. The look on her face when…

SNATCH!!!

(Camile takes her title away and clutches it as a weapon as Mark stares at her face. She still is angry and Marks eyes light up as a smile washes over his face. He rubs his entire head with both hands before letting out a small glimpse of laughter. Mark points right at Camille’s face as she slaps his finger away.)

Mark Michaels: THATS THE LOOK!

(He puts his finger in her face again as Ms. Extreme moves it out of her face once again.)

Mark Michaels: RIGHT THERE! That anger! That vitriol, that heated expression right there! I want that at Pain for Pride! I want that energy all the way up until the last moment of the match. All the way up until your last seconds as Pure champion. I want that expression on your dumb, puppet face until it sets in that your reign is about to be over. I want you to be foaming at the mouth, pissed off at everything I’ve done to you and this company this season and I want you to ball it all up and bring it back to me because that expression is the same one that’s on my face. That is the same one I wear everyday I walk in to work and have to be reminded about how people like you got handed everything I deserved! You know what I want! Now…

(Mark gets right in her face.)

Mark Michaels: NOW IT’S TIME I GET IT!

(Ms. Extreme is standing nose to nose with the bigger competitor as security finally appears with Michael Belfort directing traffic.)

Michael Belfort: C’MON GUYS! SAVE IT FOR PFP! BREAK IT UP! C’MON!

(The Crowd is rabid as Extreme and Michaels are separated. We see them struggling to hold both competitors back as Camile raises her Pure title in the air before we cut back to ringside.)

Stew-O: Jesus! Talib Bari is missing out on moments like this!

Flannery McCoy: No love lost between these two as they will meet again at Pain for Pride in a rematch for Ms. Extreme’s Pure Championship. Mark Michaels has been fiending for his form of justice here on Dynasty and winning this title against the Extreme Face of EAW after she breaks the record for longest Pure title reign could be exactly gives him the satisfaction he’s been fighting for.

Stew-O: On the flip side, Camile has been one of the greatest champions in EAW history with this run and a lot of her fans don’t want to see it end any time soon. Two narratives to watch for. Will Mark’s desire outweigh Camille’s history making run? We will find out at Pain for Pride XII!

(Commercial Break)

(Advertisement airs for 1-800-Crimestoppers. Call us now if you see a white van following you for 30 minutes!)

(A commercial for Chris Elite’s new “Gawd Given Baldness” shaving cream, get a smooth chrome dome like Big Baldy Bhris by purchasing a bottle at your local Walgreens today!)

Stephie Love: The following contest is set for one fall! Introducing first…

(‘DEVIL’ by Slipknot plays as Jason McKormick makes his way to the ring.)

Stew-O: Jason is coming out here with purpose, he can make his mark with a win over Ms. Extreme here tonight!

Flannery McCoy: He certainly could.

Stephie Love: From Jackson, Michigan…the Psychopath, Jason McKormick! Introducing his opponent…

(‘Gangsta’ by New Years Day plays as Ms. Extreme walks out to the roar of the crowd.)

Flannery McCoy: Ms. Extreme is on an absolute tear with the PURE title, tonight is a non title match, but you can bet she’s going to carry herself like a champion!

Stew-O: You’re absolutely right, part of being a champion is not taking any days off. Regardless of if she’s defending or not, she’s representing the title!

Stephie Love: from Calabasa, California…she is the reigning, defending, undisputed EAW PURE champion…The Red Queen Ms. Extreme!

(Stephie exits the ring as the official takes the title to hand to the time keeper and calls for the bell.)

(DING DING DING!)

Flannery McCoy: Ms Extreme shoots in quickly, landing a double leg take down on Jason, who was taken completely by surprise…she transitions it to a front facelock that Jason tries to escape, but fails. The Pure champion has a deathgrip on McKormick’s head…JASON ESCAPES! McKormick scrambles away and Ms. Extreme rises to her knee, a half grin on her face…LOOK OUT! Jason rushes her, looking to offset her momentum, but Ms. Extreme with a drop toe hold…SHE’S GOING FOR THE AVA LOCK!

Stew-O: Ms. Extreme has the Ava lock in tight! Jason can’t possibly escape…..HE CAN’T HE TAPS!

(DING DING DING!)

Stephie Love: Ladies and gentlemen, your winner by submission…The PURE Champion, MS. Extreme!

Flannery McCoy: Welp. Quick, easy, and straight to the point.

Stew-O: The only thing guaranteed in this life is death, taxes, and Ms. Extreme owning The Score! I know Mark Michaels is back there watching and raging like a madman trying his hardest to break free from being held back by whatever security and backstage personnel there is… but I can guarantee you that Ms. Extreme is more than ready for whatever fight Mark intends to bring and if this match is any indication, Pain for Pride is going to be a helluva fight for him.

Flannery McCoy: I couldn’t have said it better myself.

Stew-O: By the way Flannery, why did you never sign Camille to Empire? It’s no wonder it’s going down under.

Flannery McCoy: ANYWAYS, speaking of The Score, up next we got a mini reunion as bitter rivals Ryan Wilson and Shaker Jones team up to take on the number one contenders for the Tag Titles, Flo Bros! But before we get to that, let’s check in on our General Manager…

(Dynasty cuts to the backstage area, and more specifically to the office of StarrStan. StarrStan is sitting behind his desk, going through some papers. At the moment, the general manager of Dynasty seems to be looking for something specific.)

StarrStan (muttering): Now I know I put that contract with the rest of these papers…

(Other than StarrStan muttering, and the shuffling of papers, the office is quiet.)

? Yeah, I’m gonna take my horse to the old town road… ?

? I’m gonna ride ’til I can’t no more… ?

? I’m gonna take my horse to the old town road… ?

StarrStan: FUCK!!!

(StarrStan grabs for his phone and starts fumbling with it.)

StarrStan: I thought I put that on silent!

(StarrStan finally manages to mash the speaker button after staring at the strange number for a second.)

StarrStan: Hello??

Voice: You have a collect call. Do you accept?

StarrStan: A collect call? That’s still a thing? Who’s it from?

Voice: You have a collect call. Do you accept?

StarrStan: Who’s it from?!

Voice: Look breh, I don’t have time for this shit. Do you accept the damn call or not? Ain’t nobody gunna call you collect unless it’s important.

(StarrStan blinks.)

StarrStan: Fine.

Voice: So you accept this call?

StarrStan: Yes! For crying out loud I accept the call!

Voice: Great. Have a good day, sir.

(After a few seconds of waiting, a voice finally filters in through the other line.)

???: Mama mia! StarrStan?! You there??

StarrStan: Gio?? Gio?? Is that you? Are you still in jail??

???: Sì, it’s me, and yes I’m still in jail.

StarrStan (whispering): Did your uhhh family not bail you out?

(Gio is heard sighing through the phone.)

Gio’s Voice: Those jamokes are the reason I’m calling! Listen, I don’t wanna get into to many details but I’m not who everyone thinks I am!

(A puzzled look crosses StarrStan’s face.)

StarrStan: What do you mean??

Gio’s Voice: Exactly that! I’ve been lied too. Look, like I said I’ll give you all the details soon. But just know I’m working on getting outta here and I’ll be back on Dynasty soon.

StarrStan: I mean Gio, it’s Pain for Pride season and I would love for you to be apart of it. I mean, if you need some help I guess I could send so-

Gio’s Voice: No. I would never ask for that. You opened your proverbial home to me, and for that I’m grateful. I will be back on Dynasty in a couple of weeks, hopefully less. I’m working on getting out of here and tracking down the answers I need.

StarrStan: Okay??

Gio’s Voice: Next time you see me, I’ll be a whole different person.

(Before StarrStan can reply, the call disconnects. The general manager looks down at this phone and scratches his head.)

StarrStan: What in the ever loving fuck??

(StarrStan shakes his head and goes back to his papers. The scene fades out.)

(A package airs documenting the rivalry between Shaker Jones and Ryan Wilson including last weeks attack and the announcement of them facing off at Pain for Pride.)

Stephie Love: Ladies and Gentlemen, the following is a tag team contest…introducing first…

(‘I Love It Loud’ by KISS plays as Shaker Jones walks out on to the stage, annoyed look on his face.)

Flannery McCoy: Shaker none too happy to be in this match this week, but he’s going to have to get along with his partner, otherwise he can kiss his Pain for Pride match goodbye!

Stew-O: Shaker knows that and to be frank isn’t the one I’d be concerned with, he wants a shot at Ryan more than anything. Ryan, on the other hand, may be one to look out for. He’s devious enough to try to goad Shaker into forfeiting it all. The former members of the Score need to pull it together once again here tonight to ensure their dreams of a big match on the grandest stage come true.

Stephie Love: Introducing first, from Manitoba Canada….The Punk Rock Cowboy…Shaker Jones! Introducing his partner…

(‘My Way’ by Limp Bizkit plays as Ryan Wilson walks out on to the stage, smirk plastered on his face.)

Flannery McCoy: A cocky Ryan Wilson here tonight, looks like he’s calling for a high five that Shaker is promptly ignoring, no shame ladies and gentlemen from Ryan Wilson here.

Stephie Love: From Manitoba, Quebec, Canada….The Canadian Studmuffin…Ryan Wilson!

(The crowd boos, but Ryan motions as if it’s directed at Shaker.)

Stephie Love: Introducing their opponents…

(‘All I do is Win’ by DJ Khaled plays as The FloBros make their way to the ring accompanied by Carsyn Carter.)

Stew-O: Any team in the company would have trouble with the FloBros, much less a fragmented tem like Shaker and Ryan Wilson, these two need to have their head in the game or else they’re not going to walk away here tonight with anything less than pain and bruises.

Flannery: Absolutely, don’t forget Carsyn at ringside, the tactical mind of the FloBros is never far behind. The Score needs to be on the same page tonight!

Stephie Love: Introducing, accompanied by Carsyn Carter…Thadd Blazevich, Crosby Carter…The FloBros!

(The crowd erupts in cheers as the Bros totally bask in the adulation of the crowd. Stephie exits the ring as the official calls for the bell.)

(DING DING DING!)

Flannery McCoy: We have Shaker and Crosby starting things off here tonight, Shaker moves for the collar and elbow, but Corsboy sees it coming and slips behind catching Shaker in a waist lock, lifting the former BBB Champion off his feet and planting him on the mat face down! Crosby floats around and is quick on his feet…he stomps the back of Shaker’s head! Jones is rolling on the mat in pain! Crosby hits the ropes…basement dropkick to Shaker, pushing him out of the ring, and landing him on the mat with a thud!

Stew-O: Crosby tries to follow, but the official stops him, backing him away…LOOKOUT! While the referee had his back turned Carsyn hits a running head scissors! Shaker is reeling! Look at Ryan Wilson, laughing in his corner, you can just feel the empathy for his partner, for crying out loud! Shaker slides back into the ring Crosby stalking him like he was a wounded deer! Lightning quick elbow drop to the sternum of Jones and things are looking like they’re quickly sliding out of the Score’s hands. Shaker is in trouble, reaching toward his partner who does not at all seem interested in getting in the ring with the FloBros, not that I can blame him!

Flannery McCoy. Crosby sees that and seems to think a moment before whipping Shaker to his corner, the force of the impact causing Shaker’s arm to slap Ryan across the chest, effectively tagging him in. The official indicates it’s a fair tag, and tells Ryan he needs to enter the ring…He does, slowly, and Crosby seems eager to take on the Canadian Studmuffin, as he likes to call himself, and rushes forward to initiate a lockup!

Stew-O: Crosby and Ryan are struggling for position and end up tied in the ropes! The referee calls for the break and Crosby backs off to his corner…he tags Thadd who leaps over the ropes, bouncing on the balls of his feet, he rushes forward and unloads a barrage of strikes, catching him in the corner unable to escape! Ryan covers up the best he can, and slides out of the corner! WIlson rushes forward and slaps the shoulder of Shaker! Jones is back in, though he doesn’t look happy!

Flannery McCoy: Ryan slides out of the ring and stands at ringside as Shaker enters the ring, Thadd whips Shaker to the ropes…DUDE, IT’S A SPEAR! Thadd cut Shaker in half with the spear! As he’s holding his midsection in pain Thadd leaps to the top turnbuckle…The FloBro 420! He landed the high risk move! Blazevich hooks the leg as Ryan looks on amused…

Referee: ONE! TWO! THREE!

(DING DING DING!)

Stephie Love: Ladies and Gentlemen, your winners by pinfall…The FloBros!

(‘All I Do Is Win’ begins to play as the Bros and Carsyn celebrate in the ring.)

Flannery McCoy: That’s all she wrote! It’s clear that Ryan and Shaker no matter how hard they tried, just couldn’t mesh like they once did and the Bros took advantage of that. Wait look at this!

(Ryan Wilson and Shaker are seen mouthing off at one another in the ring blaming the other for the loss. Tensions get high as the two are nose to nose and look to be on the verge of coming to blows but cooler heads prevail as they don’t want their Pain for Pride match compromised.)

(Commercial Break)

(Advertisement for Mr. DEDEDE’s book “GAWDVERBS: A Machiavellian’s Guide To Un-Fucking Yourself”, available for pre-order now!)

(A preview for the Fight Grid special “The Emancipation of Cage” airs as he talks about what led to his December break from EAW and the stress that lead to it. But you know what makes me stressed? Not being able to find a good quality snag. That’s why I’m here to tell you about Jamie O’Hara brand snags, imported straight from Australia! If you love long phallic shaped objects in your mouth then this is the perfect food for you. Get it now at your local grocery store!)

( Camera opens up to the Staples Center where a casket rests on a mortuary stretcher in the center of the ring. In the backdrop are two sets of potted ferns, and a portrait hanging on a metal frame hanging from the rafters with a blend of pictures showing The 1% stable throughout the different periods of its existence. )

“ILLEST MUTHAFUCKA ALIIIIIIVE!!!!!”

( “Illest Motherfucker Alive” by The Throne plays, creating a stir within the sold out Los Angeles audience as they all jump up to their feet to give a thunderous mixed reaction. The lights of the stage glow a familiar royal shade of gold, and The 1% graphics appear on the titantron, minitron and LED surfaces scattered around the Staples Center. )

( After a brief moment, Theron Nikolas walks out to the stage dressed in a 1% short sleeve tee shirt, and wearing the Answers World Championship around his waist. )

Stephie Love: Ladies and Gentlemen please welcome the ANSWERS WORLD CHAMPION, THEEEEROOOOOOOON NNNIKKOOOOOOOOOOLAAAAAAAS!!!!

Stew-O: We were told at the onset of this Dynasty event that there would be a “final nail placed in the coffin”, and that Flannery was really the extent of the explanation of what we’re about to see right now. It’s pretty clear with the ever so familiar music obviously that the Answers World Champion has a message in relation to one of the most dominant and chaotic stables in recent memory, The 1%.

Flannery McCoy: We don’t know a lot about what Theron has to say but let’s face it,The 1% is a one man show at this point! Things have just about completely disassembled especially following the betrayal Nikolas faced at Gateway To Glory when Amber Keys blindsided him and left him to be ripped apart by a returning Mr. DEDEDE. Since then the champion’s had his sights set to Pain for Pride.

Stew-O: Well he’d better keep 110% of his energy on that colossal championship bout set for the showcase of the immortals; if you haven’t already been made aware by now it will be Theron Nikolas defending his Answers World Championship against former AWC Darkane, former 1% stablemate Mr. DEDEDE, and the Grand Rampage winner Jamie O’Hara!

Flannery McCoy: It’s shaping up to be one of the biggest matches in the history of EAW, certainly the biggest match of Theron Nikolas’ entire career and championship reign. And unlike every other point in his illustrious reign, chances are there will be no 1% watching over his shoulder. Let’s hear what the self professed “God-Emperor” has to say.

( “Illest Motherfucker Alive” dies down and Theron looks around, dark shades covering his eyes, with puckered lips as the Los Angeles crowd boos the hell out of him. )

Theron Nikolas: ….

( The boos of the audience become even louder as Theron lifts the microphone up to his face. He drops his arms and looks around, causing the heat to become even louder. Theron slowly lifts one hand up and points it to the titantron, and the following clip comes on the air: )

( //www.youtube.com/watch?v=6evGk5JElAI )

( The LA crowd EXPLODES with thunderous boos, causing Theron to belly laugh in the ring out of pure joy over the crowd’s reaction. )

Theron Nikolas: I know I know I know I’m sorry, I really shouldn’t be laughing. This is actually a very serious moment we’re about to get into right now and I believe the following moment actually calls for some reverence. So if you people would shut the hell up for a minute-

Crowd: SUCK A DICK THERON SUCK A DICK :clap: :clap: SUCK A DICK THERON SUCK A DICK :clap: :clap: SUCK A DICK THERON SUCK A DICK :clap: :clap: SUCK A DICK THERON SUCK A DICK :clap: :clap: SUCK A DICK THERON SUCK A DICK :clap: :clap: SUCK A DICK THERON SUCK A DICK :clap: :clap:

Theron Nikolas: *sigh* California, California, California. Classy as ever. Look… every once ever so often, perhaps even once every generation, a talent arrives to this sacred ground known as Elite Answers Wrestling with every single tool on the shed to become successful. More than that, actually, because having all of the tools to succeeding in this sacred land; however having the wherewithal and the instinct, the intelligence, and having the calling to apply these tools is what truly makes said talent a rarity.

I am well aware that a lot of you people loathe me. It is no secret, I am perhaps the most despised man to ever step foot in a Friday Night Dynasty ring. And one of the reasons why I am so despised is because so many of you see what I have, and you tell yourselves that I don’t deserve it. You see my unrivaled success and you feel as though I haven’t earned it… and one of the reasons why that is… is because of this.

( Theron points back to the 1% portrait, showing a collage of pictures including their War Games post-match celebration, the union between The 1% and The Queen’s Court, Theron’s victory at Operation: Doomsday flanked by Liquid Swords, and the trio of Theron, Cleopatra and Amber Keys. )

Theron Nikolas: This has always been the dealbreaker for all of you. This idea that I’ve had “help”. The 1% always represented “the help” for Theron Nikolas. And granted, that’s exactly what it was. I won’t even try and bullshit you, you people are presumably smarter than that, you understand that The 1% has been responsible for my will being inflicted upon this company no matter what the obstacle was. What you fail to realize however is that I deserve as much credit for what The 1% has accomplished as any other man deserves for any other accomplishment he has ever garnered in the history of this federation. Because The 1% was the singular most powerful entity any of you have, or will EVER see. And don’t be mistaken, it’s not because of the pieces on the board, it’s because of the man responsible for putting all the pieces of the puzzle together. That man being me.

A while ago I likened myself unto EAW Hall of Famer, a man widely known as “EAW’s # 1 Legend”, Mak. And I still believe that comparison is appropriate in a lot of ways… but lately I’ve been likening myself unto somebody who’s accomplished far more in the business, a man whose impact will always be felt no matter where in the business you are, or what level in the business you are at. And that man I am referring to is none other… than CM Banks.

Crowd: WE WANT BANKS! WE WANT BANKS! WE WANT BANKS! WE WANT BANKS! WE WANT BANKS! WE WANT BANKS! WE WANT BANKS! WE WANT BANKS! WE WANT BANKS! WE WANT BANKS!

Theron Nikolas: (smiling) I’m sure you do. I’m sure you’d love to see that entrance music hit right now and have Ronn Banks walk out here to kick my ass and avenge his untimely demise. But this isn’t a fairytale. Your fallen heroes don’t get to come back in this movie. But they do get to live on through the memory of all. As much as it may be a curveball to confess it, I may as well tell you the truth…. I am the closest thing to Ronn Banks that you will EVER see in this company.

( Crowd boos. )

Theron Nikolas: I am every much of a builder, I know how to put the right pieces in place. The founder and the creator of this company had to use his intellect and his leadership in order to create the unstoppable empire, and I have the exact same capacity to do the exact same thing.. but BETTER. But unlike Ronn Banks I’m not here to create some pro-wrestling Valhalla the way he did with EAW. I’m not here to use my powers for “good”, I’m here to use my power for me. And that’s exactly what The 1% is. My masterful persuasion, my unparalleled leadership, my wisdom far FAR beyond my years that allowed me to bend anyone I wanted around my finger as though they were some malleable piece of putty… and I have used The 1% to my advantage to enforce whatever the hell I wanted.

Which means yes, I manipulated the so-called “master builder” Mr. DEDEDE into erecting the walls of an impenetrable fortress, and building the monument that is my epic reign as your Answers World Champion. I manipulated Amber Keys and Madison Kaline to be the expendable little dogs that they are. I even got Jack Ripley to serve as my lackey. Which leads me to an article I read on Forbes from back in November just a week or so after I captured this beautiful championship belt on my waist… An article which I still have framed on my wall…

( Theron motions to the titantron, and an article on Forbes is seen with the headline “OPINION: Why The 1% Is A Middle Finger To Professional Wrestling.” )

Theron Nikolas: “THE 1%, A MIDDLE FINGER TO PROFESSIONAL WRESTLING” written by Steve Cooper. Well STEVE, (looking into the camera) I hope you can see this right now from wherever the hell you are, because what I’m about to say is going to be awfully bittersweet… THE 1% IS DEAD.

( The crowd gives a pop for that announcement. )

Theron Nikolas: You hear me? It’s fucking dead. But it was never the middle finger to professional wrestling. I AM THE MIDDLE FINGER TO WHAT YOU CALL ‘PROFESSIONAL WRESTLING.’ I am successful in spite of people like you (points to the crowd) and all of you, (reverts his focus back to the camera) and the only reason why there isn’t a 1% around right now to continue doing my bidding, is because it serves no purpose to me anymore.

(Camera pans back and Theron continues speaking to the crowd.)

I’ve proven Marquee show after Marquee show that I don’t need another human being alive to get me through what you deem to be “impossible odds.” You all thought an Extreme Elimination Chamber would be gruesome end to my short lived reign, and I outlasted five other men with ease. You all thought Jamie O’Hara had my number and that he would make his triumphant return at my expense, and then I entirely outperformed him with ease. And now once again Pain for Pride is supposed to be some impossible task that I will never be able to endure, which reminds me of an asinine saying that I used to hear over and over again a long long time ago long before I ever laced a pair of wrestling boots.

A saying that went “You cannot kill what you did not create.”

( Theron chuckles. )

Theron Nikolas: That’s a saying that by every metric should in fact be true… except for one fatal flaw… I EXIST. And at Pain for Pride Festival I killed a career that not only I didn’t create but I killed the DEFINITION of the “creator” himself. In other words I am able to destroy any fucking thing you put in front of me.

( Theron turns to the open casket and rips the 1% tee shirt off his back before chucking it in the casket. He grabs the framed 1% photo and also places it in the casket. )

Theron Nikolas: Everything by definition is “temporary”, permanence itself is an illusion. The one thing that has been a guarantee this entire season is that Theron Nikolas will prevail by any measure, and at all costs. The 1% may be dead as you know it, but there’s nobody else who can put the final nail in the coffin… I am willing to close the casket for good.

( Theron shuts the lid of the casket, and he turns back to the audience. )

Theron Nikolas: The stepping stone that was The 1% is gone for good, and come Pain for Pride, so will the hopes and dreams of three fools who have underestimated me all season. Eventually every knee shall bow, eventually every tongue shall confess, long live my immortal championship reign, and long live the God-Emperor.

( “I Hope You Suffer” by AFI plays and Theron Nikolas shows off with his Answers World Championship before the booing Los Angeles audience. )

Stew-O: A strong statement from the characteristically confident Answers World Champion.

Flannery McCoy: As I’ve said before you really do have to give the devil his due, by hook or by crook he has made it this far into an – in a lot of ways – unprecedented championship reign the likes of which Friday Nights haven’t seen before.

Stew-O: No matter how you look at his actions or the way he goes about his business you can’t deny that it takes an extraordinary man to accomplish what he has accomplished thus far. However you’ve got to wonder despite Theron considering himself “underestimated”, if he’s not underestimating his Pain for Pride opponents.

( Match card appears on screen featuring the main event pitting Darkane against Mr. DEDEDE. )

Flannery McCoy: Well maybe it’ll take a front row look at tonight’s main event to give Theron a better perspective of what he’s got in store! We’ll see the AWC back out here as he and Jamie O’Hara join us on commentary to watch a match that I still can’t believe we’re even getting on free TV!

Stew-O: For the first time ever Mr. DEDEDE meets Darkane one on one LIVE tonight here in the world famous Staples Center!

(A replay airs of the confrontation between Mark Michaels and Ms. Extreme.)

[[MARK MICHAELS DEFEATS CONOR CUNT(no typo) – TBP ASAP)

(Dynasty cuts backstage and Carsyn Carter, Crosby Carter, and Thadd Blazevich are standing around. They’re all smiles as they chat amongst themselves, with the topic of conversation obviously being Pain for Pride.)

Carsyn Carter: You guys just keep rolling, and I couldn’t be more proud of the two of you. Bro for Pride is going to be lit!

Crosby Carter: The future Unified Tag Team Champions :wow:

Thadd Blazevich: Who would have thunk it? Dude, a year ago we weren’t even close to being in this position. Now, we’re literally on the road to Bro for Pride where we are going to finally get a crack at the championships we came to this company to win.

Carsyn Carter: And you two have patiently waited for this chance. We’ve had to watch shitty teams like The Legion get chance after chance at the belts, and fail. Other teams have come and gone as well, but you guys never lost faith and always kept your eyes on the bigger picture, and did your thing. I’m so fucking proud.

(Crosby pulls his wife close and kisses the top of her head.)

Crosby Carter: You’ve done just as much as we have, babe. Probably more. You’re the one who believed in us all along and encouraged us to go after these opportunities. Without you, who knows if Thadd and I would have made it to The Factory? SCW? We definitely wouldn’t have made it here without you helping us become better versions of ourselves every single day.

Thadd Blazevich: All facts. You’re a real one, Cars, and I’m glad you’re ours.

(Carsyn smiled, but her pretty face turned serious after a moment.)

Carsyn Carter: So as great as tonight has been, we do have to focus on Bro for Pride even more now. We’re all aware of the change to the match that nasty little cunt Veena Adams made last night on Empire. Throwing The Revolution into the mix doesn’t really change much, but we will have to work a little harder in order to overcome the challenge they present.

Thadd Blazevich: Yeah ‘challenge’. They’re another one of those teams who continue to get chances and fail. They’re not a threat to us, man.

???: Is that so?

(The camera shot widens and the Showdown tag team known as The Revolution are seen walking into the picture. Jake Smith is the one who spoke, and as usual, Joshua Nicholls is right there alongside his partner. The Revolution come to a stop in front of the Bros and smirk.)

Jake Smith: We might have fallen short when it comes to capturing gold on our first two attempts, but lets not act like Crosby hasn’t lost a championship match before either. It was back at King of Elite where your boy had a chance to walk away with the New Breed Championship but ultimately fell short.

Crosby Carter: Hey, I didn’t get pinned and it was like my second match in the company. I ain’t even mad about that, dude.

Joshua Nicholls: And neither of us are mad about falling short twice before. You never learn or grow without experiencing some type of setback, and come Pain for Pride, when The Revolution step inside the ring with the two of you AND The Wildcards, the third time will be the charm.

Jake Smith: Josh and I have worked tirelessly over on Showdown to continue to prove ourselves despite the losses we’ve had. Everything we have done – together and separately – since signing with this company have led us to Pain for Pride. We’re coming hard for those belts and it doesn’t matter who ends up getting in our way. Nobody is going to be spared.

(Jake looked down at Carsyn after speaking that last line. The blonde rolled her eyes and squared her shoulders.)

Carsyn Carter: And you can bring it, because if I get hit, trust me bitch, I hit back ten times harder. I’m not scared of you and my boys damn sure aren’t scared of you. You’ve already proven that you don’t have what it takes to be champions here in EAW. When everything is on the line both of you lack the killer instinct needed to finish off your opposition and get the victory. You’ve fallen to the Jaded Hearts. You’ve fallen to The Wildcards. Come Pain for Pride, you’re going to fall to the FloBros.

Joshua Nicholls: We’ll see about that, honey. You just make sure that your boys know what they’re getting into and that they’re prepared to suffer at the hands of The Revolution.

Thadd Blazevich (rolling his eyes): Alright, dude. You guys do you, and we’re gunna keep doing us.

Jake Smith: Tune into Showdown tomorrow night and you’ll see exactly what happens when we do just that.

(The Revolution glare at The Bros. Joshua has to the nerve to wink at Carsyn as both himself and Jake take their leave. The scene backstage fades out.)

(The scene cuts to Stephie Love in the ring, ready for the next contest.)

Stephie Love: Our next match is scheduled for ONE FALL!

Crowd: ONE FALL!

Stephie Love: AND IS A CASH IN THE VAULT PREVIEW MATCH! Introducing first, from Salem, Massachusetts…

(“Blood // Water” by Grandson hits and Bowie Grey emerges from behind the curtain.)

Stephie Love: Weighting in at one hundred and eighty-five pounds, The Reaper, Bowie Grey!

Flannery McCoy: Here we go! A Cash in the Vault preview is under way! I’m excited for this one.

Stew-O: Don’t get too excited, Bowie Grey has no chance tonight against Lucas Johnson.

Flannery McCoy: Wait a minute! Speaking of Lucas Johnson, he just attacked Bowie Grey from behind before he even made it to the ring! His bodyguard, Feral Khan, isn’t too far behind either! This is disgusting!

Stew-O: That’s what I’m talking about! Taking the offence right to Bowie Grey. Lucas Johnson means business here tonight! He’s stomping away at Grey on the outside. This is great!

Flannery McCoy: But the match hasn’t even started yet! He’s not going to win it this way.

Stew-O: Oh, he knows exactly what he’s doing. Look, he’s tossing Grey into the ring and sliding him after him. This is one smart man.

(DING! DING! DING!)

Flannery McCoy: The match is officially underway, but the damage to Grey may have already been done. Lucas is here to make a statement, anyway he can.
Stew-O: Johnson picks up Grey and tosses him hard into the corner. He quickly follows up with a hard closeline that sends Grey down to the mat. Grey has no chance in this match, just like I told you!

Flannery McCoy: But Johnson is getting cocky here, yelling at somebody in the crowd. This just might give Grey the opportunity he needs to pull himself together after that cowardly attack before the match even started. Johnson turns his attention back to Grey and gets a shot to the stomach for his troubles. Grey is fighting back here with lefts and rights!

Stew-O: But Johnson is quick to shut that down with a finger poke to the eye. The referee is warning him but Johnson doesn’t care. He’s a man on a mission here. Johnson grabs Grey by the head and oh! Neckbreaker! He picks up Grey and delivers a quick belly-to-belly suplex that sends the smaller man across the ring. Beautiful!

Flannery McCoy: Grey is slow to get up and, my god! Johnson hits him with a Shining Wizard for his trouble. Quick cover attempt here…

ONE!

TWO!

Flannery McCoy: Grey kicks out! There is still some fight left in him.

Stew-O: Not for much longer. Johnson is on a mission here.

Flannery McCoy: Wait, why is Feral Khan on the apron? Get him out of there, ref!

Stew-O: Low blow by Johnson! The referee didn’t see anything! Johnson hits Grey with a quick Feel the Pain and Grey has no idea where he’s at right now. It’s all but over, Flannery!

Flannery McCoy: Khan is off the apron and Lucas Johnson is signally for the Red Arrow. If he hits this, it’s all over! Johnson to the top rope… Red Arrow connects! Johnson in for the cover.

ONE!

TWO!

THREE!

(DING! DING! DING!)

Stew-O: It was over before it started. Grey had no idea what he was walking into tonight. Johnson has advanced and Grey has to go back to the drawing board!

Flannery McCoy: Wait a minute. Albert Hitchman is coming down to the ring, directing traffic. What is Feral Khan looking under the ring for?

Stew-O: It looks like Johnson isn’t done sending his message to the entire EAW locker room! Khan has pulled out a chair and Hitchman is pointing at Bowie Grey in the ring. The referee is trying to stop it but Johnson is having none of it. He tosses the referee to the outside and begins to stomp Grey down in the middle of the ring.

Flannery McCoy: This is disgusting! Can we get somebody out here to stop this?! The match is over, what the hell are they doing?!

Stew-O: Sending a clear message to the rest of the Cash in the Vault participants is what they’re doing. Khan in the ring now as Johnson picks up Grey. Oh! Chair shot! That was devastating! Khan isn’t done either. He picks up Grey and tosses him to the outside. Johnson slides out and reaches under the ring. Johnson pulls out a table and it looks like these two aren’t done yet.

Flannery McCoy: Khan hits Grey with another chair shot! This is sickening! Grey is down on the outside and Johnson has set up that table. Wait. Khan is putting Grey’s right arm in the chair. No! No! NO! Khan just stomped down on the chair with all his weight! There is no doubt his arm is broken. Why the hell is nobody doing anything about this?!

Stew-O: Khan removes the chair and Hitchman is pointing at the table and shouting out instructions. Khan with a kick the mid section on Grey.

Flannery McCoy: What is he… oh my god! He just powerbombed Bowie Grey through the table and the table exploded! Grey is out cold. Khan has gone back for the mangled chair, what the hell else can he possibly do to Bowie Grey! Your point has been made!

Stew-O: Another chair shot to that already injured arm! And another! And another!

Flannery McCoy: His arm his shattered. I can’t believe what I’m watching here. Hitchman pats Johnson on the back and the two head back towards the ramp, Khan is still standing over Grey’s broken body. These men should be ashamed of themselves!

Stew-O: They made a statement here tonight, Flannery. Nobody is going to take Lucas Johnson lightly going forward, that’s for damn sure!

(Referees and trainers finally come out of the back to help Bowie Grey. Khan pushes his way through them to join Hitchman and Lucas Johnson and the three men raise their arms in victory before heading backstage.)

(A final commercial break airs)

(Don’t miss the NBA Finals LIVE on ABC this Sunday as a GOAT carries a shithole of a country on his back to their only championship ever before leaving, by beating a superteam consisting of a dude who got beat up by Tristian Thompson, a spot up shooter who thinks he’s better than Kemba the GOAT, a cuck whose wife wants attention from other men, and a future Knick!)

(Dynasty comes back on air as the camera focuses on the commentary table)

Stew-O: Welcome back, we are just moments away from our main event of the evening but before we continue, I would like to provide a brief update. As you can see, Bowie Gray was viciously assaulted just moments ago by Lucas Johnson and Feral Khan, and the way things are looking Bowie Gray will not be returning to EAW for the foreseeable future as he has suffered a multitude of injuries. StarrStan has informed us that he was going to hold another Dynasty qualifying match next week before he was vetoed due to the fact that brands can only hold two qualifying matches each to keep things equal. Therefore every brand will have a representative next week on Dynasty in a fatal four way to determine the replacement for Bowie Gray in the Cash in the Vault ladder match.

(The camera cuts to Stephie, who is standing in the ring. She smiles into the camera and raises her microphone up.)

Stephie Love: LADIES AND GENTLEMEN… PLEASE WELCOME THE ANSWERS WORLD CHAMPION… THERON NIKOLAS!!!!

(“I Hope You Suffer” by AFI begins to blast across the public address system. As soon as the champion steps onto the stage inside the Staples Center, he is met with a heavy round of jeers. The fans can’t stand anything about Theron Nikolas and they let him have it, and the arrogant Canadian just soaks it all up.)

Flannery McCoy: This main event is going to be insane. This war between Mr. DEDEDE and Darkane has been brewing since last October when the Chairman helped that man right there win his first world championship.

Stew-O: I agree. Mr. DEDEDE went on record this week and said he wouldn’t hesitate to end one of his Pain for Pride opponents tonight, and you know that Darkane isn’t going to hold anything back either. Darkane has been tortured by Theron and DEDEDE for nearly this whole season, and tonight is going to be all about payback for the Grave Worm.

Flannery McCoy: Do you think Theron or Jamie will end up getting involved in this? Or both?

Stew-O: I think we all know that this match is going to end with some kind of fuckery. None of these men like each other and all four of them have monstrous egos.

(Theron walks over to the timekeeper’s area and snatches one of the folding chairs up. He drags it away from the table and plants it right in front of Flannery and Stew-O’s table. He takes a seat, making sure that Answers World Championship stays draped perfectly across his shoulder.)

Stephie Love: AND NOW PLEASE WELCOME… EAW HALL OF FAMER AND THE 2019 GRAND RAMPAGE WINNER… JAMIE O’HARA!!!!

(All the boos for Theron quickly turn into cheers as “Ultimate Battle” by ZENTA [EAW Edit] begins to play. Jamie O’Hara emerges from the back to an absolutely insane reaction!)

Flannery McCoy: This crowd has just come unglued for the Grand Rampage winner, Stew!

Stew-O: And rightfully so! This man has seen it all and done it all here in Elite Answers Wrestling and he continues to pad his resume. Jamie O’Hara is truly the Ace of this company and I can not wait to see him compete come Pain for Pride!

Flannery McCoy: With all the motivation and momentum Jamie has right now, coupled with his overwhelming desire to no doubt destroy Theron and Mr. DEDEDE you know that he is going to be the heavy favorite when we get to Atlanta.

(Jamie stares daggers at Theron as he makes his way around the ring. Jamie grabs a chair from the opposite side of the announce table and he plants his right in the corner directly adjacent from Theron.)

Stew-O: You can already feel the tension, Flannery.

(Jamie’s music fades out and after a moment, it’s replaced by “Wizard in Black” by Electric Wizard​.)

Stephie Love: LADIES AND GENTLEMEN… THE FOLLOWING CONTEST IS SCHEDULED FOR….

Crowd: ONE FALL!!!!

Stephie Love: AND IT’S YOUR MAIN EVENT OF THE EVENING!!!!

(Darkane begins to make his way to the ring, shovel in hand.)

Stephie Love: INTRODUCING FIRST… FROM NEW ORLEANS, LOUISIANA… WEIGHING IN AT 234 POUNDS… HE IS THE GRAVE WORM… DARKANE!!!!

Flannery McCoy: I’m stoked! You know as well as I do that Darkane has been waiting for this.

Stew-O: I know he has, but tonight he’s got to put the fact Theron and Jamie are out here at ringside to the back of his mind and focus on just one Pain for Pride opponent.

Flannery McCoy: And the opponent he’s getting is the man who is basically responsible for ending Darkane’s world championship reign!

(Darkane slides into the ring and immediately looks over at Theron. The champion has a shit eating grin on his face and pats the Answer’s World Championship that is resting on his shoulder. Darkane points the shovel at Theron before turning his back and raising his arms in the air. A few seconds later, his theme music fades out and is replaced by “Talk Up” by Drake and Jay Z.)

Stephie Love: AND HIS OPPONENT… NOW RESIDING IN THE RYAN ADAMS ESTATE IN SANTO DOMINGO, DOMINICAN REPUBLIC… WEIGHING IN AT 222 POUNDS… PLEASE WELCOME THE GAWD… MR. DEDEDE!!!!

(The Chairman emerges from the back and just like Darkane had the shovel, DEDEDE has The Equalizer slung casually over his shoulder. He makes his way to the ring, ignoring the hate slung at him by the crowd. He also ignores Theron and Jamie, choosing to focus just on his opponent. Darkane seems to welcome that attention and the second DEDEDE gets into the ring, the two men meet in the middle, nose to nose.)

Stew-O: :lupe: I have a feeling this match might get ugly.

Flannery McCoy: There’s literally no doubt.

(The crowd is buzzing and there’s pure electricity in the air. The referee is nervous and he thinks about stepping between these two rivals, but decides against it. He does caution them both to relinquish their weapons because this is not a hardcore match. Darkane grips the shovel, while DEDEDE smirks at The Equalizer.)

Stew-O: The referee finally convinces both competitors to let go of their weapons and finally both of them take a corner.

(The referee checks with both men to make sure their ready, and it’s plain as day that they both are.)

(Ding! Ding! Ding!)

Stew-O: Darkane strikes first! He catches Mr. DEDEDE with a running knee and begins clubbing him in the back! Months and months of anger and frustration have led the former Answers World Champion to this moment and he’s not about to waste any time! Darkane grabs two handfuls of the chairman’s hair and begins slamming his face off the mat! Darkane does this several times in succession before jerking Mr. DEDEDE back up and throwing him across the ring! DEDEDE hits the ropes and rebounds back, managing to duck under a clothesline! Darkane turns around and throws his foot up, catching DEDEDE in the stomach and stopping his momentum. Darkane with an uppercut, followed up by a series of stiff right hands! Darkane throws DEDEDE into the ropes again, but this time DEDEDE locks his arms around the ropes. Darkane charges forward…

Flannery McCoy: BUT MR. DEDEDE LIFTS HIM UP AND TOSSES HIM OVER THE TOP ROPE! Mr. DEDEDE takes a few seconds to regroup and look at the look on his face. I don’t even know how to describe that, but he looks like he’s ready to murder one of his Pain for Pride opponents right now. The Gawd climbs out of the ring and stalks towards Darkane, sizing him up, and putting the boots to him! Darkane is able to land a few punches to DEDEDE’s midsection, but DEDEDE takes him and throws him into the guardrail! The referee is on the outside now and he’s actually chastising DEDEDE, telling him to get the action back inside the ring.

(All of this is happening away from Jamie and Theron, but both men are watching on. The camera cuts to both of them, taking in their respective expressions.)

Stew-o: I’m not sure if that’s even going to work, Flannery. DEDEDE signs that man’s paychecks and all of us know it. This match is going to be a shitshow, and honestly, I’m pretty sure that’s exactly how both men want it.

Flannery McCoy: You’re right. I definitely expect there to be lienancy with the rules tonight.

Stew-O: Darkane is picking himself up as DEDEDE makes his way over to him. DEDEDE grabs Darkane and runs them both towards the LED post, but it’s Darkane who gets his foot up! He slams his elbow into DEDEDE’s temple and that forces The Gawd to take a step back. Darkane grabs DEDEDE AND SLAMS HIM FACE FIRST INTO THE POST! DEDEDE hits the ground and Darkane begins to put the boots to him! He’s stomping a mudhole in DEDEDE! Darkane grabs the ropes for leverage and places his foot on DEDEDE’s neck! He’s choking the Chairman and he’s smiling about it! Darkane lets up and grabs DEDEDE, slamming him face first off the hardest part of the ring! Darkane rolls DEDEDE back inside the ring and climbs in after him.

Flannery McCoy: DEDEDE has the presence of mind to roll towards the ropes, but Darkane grabs him and pulls him up to his feet. He slams his forearm into DEDEDE’s face several times before picking him up and planting him with a suplex. He picks DEDEDE up and tosses him into the corner, before backing up and rushing forward! Darkane charges towards DEDEDE… STINGER SPLASH!!!!

Stew-O: DEDEDE MOVES!!!!

Flannery McCoy: DARKANE CRASHES IN THE CORNER!!!!

Stew-O: Ever the opportunist, DEDEDE grabs Darkane up and forces him back against the corner! DEDEDE grabs Darkane by the face and he’s mocking him!

Flannery McCoy: Typical DEDEDE. No chill.

Stew-O: Mr. DEDEDE with those boxing style punches now! He is absolutely uncorking on all parts of Darkane’s body! DEDEDE hits Darkane in the face, the stomach, the rib cage area! Darkane is hunched over and DEDEDE just kicks the holy living shit out of Darkane… his foot connecting with Darkane’s nose, and there’s fresh blood pouring onto the mat now. DEDEDE pulls Darkane out of the corner and plants him in the middle of the ring with a scoop slam! Darkane isn’t one to stay down though! DEDEDE knows this and he’s running the ropes!

Flannery McCoy: CORKSCREW ELBOW FROM THE GAWD!

Stew-O: It connects with Darkane and DEDEDE goes for the quick cover!

OOONNNEEE!!!

Flannery McCoy: KICK OUT AT ONE!!!!

(A devious smile spreads across DEDEDE’s face at Darkane’s clear act of defiance; almost as if to say, ‘how dare you kick out so quickly.’)

Stew-O: I find it hard to believe that DEDEDE didn’t expect anything less than a kick out at one especially when the cover was so arrogant.

Flannery McCoy: DEDEDE is back up to his feet now and he’s bringing Darkane up with him. He attempts to hook Darkane’s arms and I think he’s attempting to set him up for the Butterfly Effect, but Darkane blocks DEDEDE from getting the left arm in position! Darkane slips out of DEDEDE’s clutches and locks his arms around the waist of The Gawd! Darkane wrestles DEDEDE down the mat! DEDEDE is quick to reverse and get his arms around Darkane’s waist! These two are exchanging mat holds right now, with Darkane taking control and wrapping his arms around DEDEDE’s neck!

Stew-O: DEDEDE is able to break the sleeper hold, grabs Darkane by the wrist, and begins to manipulate it! Darkane is able to roll onto his back and alleviate some of the pressure, throwing his legs up and catching DEDEDE around the throat. DARKANE TRANSITIONS THAT INTO A TRIANGLE CHOKE!!!!

Flannery McCoy: NO WAY! DARKANE HAS MR. DEDEDE IN A TRIANGLE CHOKE!!! DARKANE HAS THAT HOLD IN DEEP BUT DEDEDE IS LOOKING TO TRY AND GRAB DARKANE’S KNEE! DARKANE IS TRYING TO CHANGE HIS GRIP SO HE CAN GET DEDEDE INTO AN ARMLOCK BUT DEDEDE HAS DARKANE’S KNEE AND HE IS APPLYING PRESSURE TO IT! THAT’S TAKING SOME OF THE STRAIN OFF MR. DEDEDE RIGHT NOW AND THAT IS FORCING DARKANE TO RETHINK HIS STRATEGY HERE!

Stew-O: Darkane wisely releases that choke and scrambles to his feet!

Flannery McCoy: DARKANE RUNS FOR DEDEDE AND CATCHES HIM IN THE SIDE OF THE HEAD WITH A YAKUZA KICK AS DEDEDE WAS GETTING UP! DARKANE GRABS DEDEDE AND HE HOISTS HIM UP!!! BACK SUPLEX LIFT NECKBREAKER SLAM!!! DARKANE GOES FOR THE COVER ON MR. DEDEDE!!!

OOONNNEEE!!!

TTTTWWWWOO—

Stew-O: DEDEDE KICKS OUT!!!

Flannery McCoy: DARKANE SNATCHES DEDEDE UP BY THE HAIR…. EXPLODER SUPLEX INTO THE TURNBUCKLES!!

(Darkane wipes the blood from his nose and walks over to where Mr. DEDEDE landed. He begins unlacing the turnbuckle padding.)

Stew-O: The referee is stepping in now and trying to stop Darkane from exposing that turnbuckle.

Flannery McCoy: The referee is trying to reason with Darkane but the Grave Worm isn’t having it!! Darkane shoves the referee back and rips that padding off!!! Darkane turns to grab Mr. DEDEDE but DEDEDE HITS DARKANE WITH A LOW BLOW!!!

Stew-O: A cowardly act from Mr. DEDEDE but typical. Darkane is down on the mat now and the chairman is back up to his feet. DEDEDE takes a look at that exposed turnbuckle and he starts unlacing the middle one!!!

Flannery McCoy: The referee wisely stays out of the way this time and DEDEDE works quickly to expose the middle and bottom turnbuckles! DEDEDE grabs Darkane by the hair and pulls him up! DEDEDE SLAMS DARKANE FACE FIRST INTO THE FIRST TURNBUCKLE! DEDEDE TAKES DARKANE AND SLAMS HIM INTO THE SECOND EXPOSED TURNBUCKLE! NOW DEDEDE TAKES DARKANE’S FACE AND LAYS IT ACROSS THE BOTTOM TURNBUCKLE.

Stew-O: DEDEDE takes his foot and places it on the back of Darkane’s head and takes a second to lock eyes with Theron. The Answers World Champion remains expressionless as DEDEDE shifts his eyes towards Jamie. The Ace shrugs his shoulders, clearly indifferent to the situation. DEDEDE raises his foot and stomps mercilessly on the back of of Darkane’s head!!!

Flannery McCoy: Darkane’s face just got CRUSHED between DEDEDE’s boot and that exposed turnbuckle and I’m pretty sure his nose is shattered at this point. It’s got to be.

(The camera zooms in on Darkane, who is bleeding even worse now. Blood runs from his nose, as well as from an open wound across his left eyebrow.)

Stew-O: Shattered nose or not, this is the type of environment that Darkane thrives in. Darkane has proven time and time again he’s one of the sickest people in this company. There’s no doubt in my mind that he won’t make DEDEDE pay for that in some kind of way.

Flannery McCoy: But Darkane is in trouble right now because DEDEDE has dropped down to the mat and has wrapped Darkane up in a sleeper. DEDEDE is so good at wearing down his opponents and it doesn’t seem to phase him whatsoever that Darkane’s blood is dripping all over him. DEDEDE grabs Darkane’s arm now and falls back… PLACING HIS LEG UNDERNEATH DARKANE’S CHIN! DEDEDE HAS HIS HANDS LOCKED AND HE HAS DARKANE IN THE KOJI CLUTCH! DARKANE IS DIGGING DEEP AND HE’S TRYING TO FIGHT OUT OF THIS! DARKANE IS USING ALL OF HIS STRENGTH TO TRY AND LIFT UP AND SHAKE DEDEDE OFF OF HIM BUT THE CHAIRMAN IS RELENTLESS. HE IS SCREAMING AT DARKANE TO GIVE UP, BUT DARKANE WOULD NEVER! DARKANE GETS HIMSELF TO HIS KNEES AND IS SOMEHOW INCHING HIS WAY TO THE ROPES. I HAVE NO IDEA HOW HE’S EVEN DOING THIS! DARKANE IS A FINGERTIP AWAY FROM GETTING HIS HAND ON THE ROPES!!!!

Stew-O: DARKANE WITH ONE LAST TRY TO REACH THE ROPES….

Flannery McCoy: HE DOES IT! DEDEDE HAS TO LET GO! THE REFEREE IS SCREAMING AT DEDEDE TO LET GO AND DEDEDE IS REFUSING!

Referee (Off Mic): I’m going to disqualify you!

Mr. DEDEDE (Off Mic): And I’ll fire you!

Stew-O: This is such a bullshit situation for Darkane because we all know that Mr. DEDEDE is serious. This is the man who fired a bunch of people on Christmas Eve this past year just for fun.

Flannery McCoy: I mean he’s done a lot worse than that, but I see where you’re going with that. Despite the fact Darkane’s holding onto the ropes, DEDEDE has refused to break the Koji Clutch.

(That’s when Jamie starts to make his way to the side of the ring where DEDEDE and Darkane are. That grabs Theron’s attention, and all of a sudden things get a little more interesting.)

Stew-O: Theron Nikolas has gotten up from his chair and DEDEDE has actually let go of Darkane. DEDEDE and Jamie are staring at one another, and this crowd has fallen silent. Everyone wants to see these two men come to blows especially given the fact that DEDEDE tried to end Jamie completely last year.

Flannery McCoy: Not to mention all the pain and anguish DEDEDE has caused Jamie’s family. Stuff like that doesn’t just go away overnight.

Stew-O: This little back and forth that DEDEDE is engaging in with Jamie has given Darkane a chance to recover! Darkane has worked his way back to his feet and is just waiting for the right moment!

Flannery McCoy: BUT LOOK AT THERON! THERON NIKOLAS HAS GRABBED THE SHOVEL THAT DARKANE BROUGHT DOWN TO RINGSIDE AND HE’S SHOUTING AT DARKANE! DARKANE TURNS AROUND AND SEES THERON WITH THE WEAPON!

Stew-O: DEDEDE TURNS AROUND AND HE CHARGES FORWARD!!!! DEDEDE LOOKING TO HIT DARKANE FROM BEHIND WITH A SPEAR BUT DARKANE SIDESTEPS HIM! DEDEDE FLIES THROUGH THE ROPES AND TAKES OUT THERON INSTEAD! BOTH OF THEM CRASH TO THE MAT!!!!

Flannery McCoy: DEDEDE SLOWLY GETS UP AND TURNS HIS ATTENTION BACK TO THE RING! DARKANE COMES FLYING OVER THE TOP ROPE! SUICIDE DIVE!!!! DARKANE TAKES OUT DEDEDE!!! DARKANE CLIMBS TO HIS FEET AND GRABS THE SHOVEL! THIS MATCH HAS BROKEN DOWN AND THERE’S NO TURNING BACK NOW! DARKANE TAKES THE SHOVE, PLACES IT DIRECTLY UNDERNEATH DEDEDE’S THROAT, AND STARTS CHOKING HIM WITH IT!

Stew-O: JAMIE HAS GRABBED THE EQUALIZER AND IS MAKING HIS WAY OVER TO DARKANE AND DEDEDE!!!! DARKANE LETS GO OF DEDEDE AND GETS TO HIS FEET! DARKANE AND JAMIE STARING ONE ANOTHER DOWN RIGHT NOW! DARKANE WITH THE SHOVEL AND JAMIE WITH THE EQUALIZER!

(A small conversation is had between Jamie and Darkane, before both nod their heads at one another.)

Flannery McCoy: BOTH SEEM TO BE IN AGREEMENT OVER SOMETHING AND NOW BOTH OF THEM ARE STANDING SIDE BY SIDE! BOTH OF THEM ARE WAITING FOR DEDEDE TO GET UP AND THE REFEREE IS OUT OF THE RING NOW! DEDEDE STAGGERS UP TO HIS FEET!!!

Stew-O: DARKANE SWINGS THE SHOVEL!!!!

Flannery McCoy: JAMIE SWINGS THE EQUALIZER!!!!!

(Mr. DEDEDE only has a second to react.)

Stew-O: MR. DEDEDE THROWS THE REFEREE IN FRONT OF HIM AND DIVES OUT OF THE WAY!!!!

(The shovel AND The Equalizer connect with the EAW referee and the poor man crumbles to the ground.)

Flannery McCoy: Surely that man is dead.

(The stunned crowd has fallen silent. DEDEDE seizes the moment and springs up, running at Jamie!!!!)

Stew-O: SPEAR! SPEAR! DEDEDE JUST TOOK JAMIE DOWN WITH THE SPEAR!!!!

(DEDEDE stands over Jamie, while Theron is back up and approaching Darkane.)

Flannery McCoy: THERON LOOKING TO CONNECT WITH A SUPERKICK TO DARKANE!!!!!

Stew-O: BUT DARKANE MOVES!!!! THERON MISSES AND NEARLY COLLIDES WITH MR. DEDEDE!!!! MR. DEDEDE LOOKS TO GRAB THERON, BUT THE CHAMPION SHOVES HIM BACK AND CATCHES HIM RIGHT ON THE JAW WITH A SUPERKICK!!! THERON HAS TAKEN DEDEDE DOWN WITH A SUPERKICK!!!!

Flannery McCoy: DEVIL. MAY. CRY.

(Darkane connects with the spear to the back of Theron and the champion crumbles to the mat. The entire crowd erupts in cheers as a bloodied Darkane gets to his feet and surveys the carnage.)

Stew-O: Jamie O’Hara, Mr. DEDEDE, and Theron Nikolas are all down and Darkane is the only man standing tall tonight!

(Darkane looks over at the chair that Theron had been sitting in and spies the Answers World Championship just laying there. Darkane strolls over to it, picks it up, and holds it high in the air. The crowd goes nuts for this!)

Flannery McCoy: That’s all the time we have tonight EAW Universe! But what a scene!!!

Stew-O: The road to Pain for Pride took a nasty turn tonight! We’ll see you all next week!

(Medical personnel have come rushing down to the ring area, mainly to check on the referee who is probably, literally dead. The camera cuts to a final shot of Darkane holding the Answers World Championship up and fades to black.)

(EAW logo buzzes.)

Written by Anna C. Flowers

Most Valuable Elitist #182

Showdown 6/1/2019