(EAW Logo flashes.)
(The show’s typical intro is played as images of all the captivating talent on Friday Night Dynasty is showcased. As the highly produced video fades out, we get a camera pan of the arena. The seats are empty. The Pensacola Bay Center in Pensacola, Florida as we see the building bare and the lack of fans sets the tone for the show. We hear a voice speak as the show begins.)
Stew-O: Welcome, to the A-Show in professional wrestling…Friday Night Dynasty!
(We get a camera shot of the infamous commentary team as we see Stew-O wearing a grey suit, Flannery McCoy wearing a yellow blouse, and Jake Mercer with a “Hot Takes w/ Ronan Malosi” hoodie as he has a ill fitted sports coat over it and his hair in his signature man bun.)
Flannery McCoy: We are in a new era, a post corona-virus era here in EAW.
Stew-O: The first week for the rest of our lives that is until this covid-19 pandemic is fixed. Thanks to Dynasty’s newest elitist, Chris Elite, we are now in a safer but not as enthralling situation here in EAW. Chris Elite used his unlimited GAWD contract’s powers to cancel our South American tour and force the remainder of Dynasty episodes to be shot in empty arenas from this day forward.
Jake Mercer: AND I’M JAKE MERCER, THE HAPPIEST ANNOUNCER IN SPORTS ENTERTAINMENT AND PROFESSIONAL WRESTLING HISTORY!
Stew-O: Apologizes for me not introducing my crew. I am Stew-O, this is Flannery McCoy…
Flannery McCoy: Here with you no matter what, Stew!
Stew-O: And with us is the internet’s favorite wrestling nerd, Jake Mercer.
Jake Mercer: I have been PREACHING about the seriousness of this covid-19 threat for months now. I have begged, pleaded, and prayed someone would do something about this situation. Not just for the safety of these men and women athletes, not just for the hard working fans, but for you two partners of mine…and god answered my prayers. Or, should I say, GAWD’S GREATEST GIFT ANSWERED MY PRAYERS! Now, look how safe we are! Look at us, practicing social distancing!
Stew-O: Be that as it may be, it seems the typical energy we get from our diehard fans will be gone for awhile and with one of the biggest events of the calendar year on the horizon, I am worried how that will impact all of our talent on all three of our shows.
Flannery McCoy: I think some elitist may be rattled and jarred from the lack of fans but I trust that the talented Dynasty vets and newcomers will adjust and still perform to the best of their abilities.
Stew-O: We can only hope and expect that from the likes of Korey Gaines and Serena Bennett seeing as they are going one on one this week.
Jake Mercer: How about Unified Tag Team Champ King The Visual Prophet and his opponent New Breed Champion Justin Windgate? Both men thrive off the energy of the fans but are known to be pure competitors. They are both champions for a reason and it isn’t just because of how they perform when 20k fans are cheering or booing for them weekly.
Stew-O: We also are expected to hear from Cage after Chris Elite essentially said he came to Dynasty to take over and bury Cage’s career with his GAWD contract.
Flannery McCoy: We also have a ten person over the top rope battle royal with the winner getting a spot in the Grand Rampage match. A potential classic with SOSA Henderson, Chris Elite, and Impact isn’t even our main event on a historic episode like this. A main event, World Heavyweight Championship match between The Paragon Drake King and Hot Take Ronan Malosi to cap off this night!
Stew-O: Fans or no fans, you can’t help but expect big things every friday night here on-
(‘Still Waiting’ by Sum 41 blasts as the commentators are thrown off by the music.)
Stew-O: Looks like we have some unexpected guests!
Jake Mercer: Or maybe, looks like Stew-O didn’t check the card for this week!
Jake Mercer: :mjgrin:
(Out walks Sierra Bradford and Sarah Price as both women smile and pose at the top of the stage.)
Flannery McCoy: Sierra and Sarah Supergirls, Team SASS is here on Dynasty!
Jake Mercer: It’s SASS! What are they doing here in The Impact Zone? Let’s hear what they have to say!
Stew-O: The Impact zone?
Jake Mercer: Yeah, Impact paid me 40 dollars to call this place that.
Flannery McCoy: *rolls eyes*
Stew-O: Two women that were mocked and baited by King The Visual Prophet last week on Voltage, looks like they may be here tonight to return the favor to Viz and possibly his partner Drake King tonight.
(SASS enters the ring as their music fades. Stephie Love proceeds to hand them both microphones before all three use a hand sanitizer pump near ringside and scrub their hands for 30 seconds.)
Sierra Bradford: Can’t be too careful, right Sarah?
Sarah Price: Right Sierra. How’s everybody feeling here in Florida?!
(No crowd, all silence.)
Jake Mercer: WOO!!!
Sierra Bradford: How could you forget that there aren’t any crowds, Sarah?
Sarah Price: I mean, there never are any fans here on Dynasty anyway. Right? Especially with weirdos like The Visual Prophet prancing around with that Burger King crown and those extremely and uncomfortably tight trunks he wears every week.
Sierra Bradford: Yeah, how are your clothes tighter and more revealing than the girls? He’s a disturbing guy. Viz coming to Voltage to mock and tease us was disturbing as well. He was as cocky as ever, questioning who would be the first team to step up to the plate and challenge Drake and Viz for their Unified Tag Team titles.
Sarah Price: That’s not all, he had the audacity to ask us if we would want a chance to face him and Drake. I think it was pretty obvious that Sierra and I would love nothing more to become the tag team champs and dethrone two of the biggest names on Dynasty. I think it’s clear we both would be overjoyed with taking those two down a peg and bringing those belts back home with us. But, Viz tried to play us like a fiddle and implemented his typical mind game foolishness.
Sierra Bradford: He sure did. This guy claims I wouldn’t lay a finger on Drake and that if we were to go at it that they would beat us because of my weakness and my feelings for him. Viz said all we have to do is ask and we shall receive a title shot. I can’t lie, it’s weighed on my head and my heart. I’ve come so far and Drake has been so important to my progress inside and outside of this business. But, I can’t deny my desires. I also can’t deny my partner’s desires. Sarah and I have also come so far. As friends, as partners, and as elitists. We have done so much in our short careers but we came together to make EAW PG again and to do that we need to get those tag team titles off of that degenerate Viz and if that means going through Drake…I guess we just have to do it then.
Sarah Price: Can I finally say it?!
Sierra Bradford: The floor is all yours.
Sarah Price: Drizzy and Vizzy…SASS is coming for your tag team championships!
Stew-O: It’s on now! SASS has come to Dynasty to formally extend their challenge to Drake and Viz and they-
(‘Immigrant Song’ by Led Zeppelin blasts out storms The Visual Prophet wearing his crown and his gold on his shoulder. Viz is holding a microphone and is smiling ear to ear.)
Stew-O: One half of the champs is on stage! The Visual Prophet looks excited about getting his wish!
Flannery McCoy: But where is his partner, I know Drake has reservations about facing these two with Sierra being on the other side but
Jake Mercer: YOU SPOKE THE CHAMP UP! Champ Champ is rushing out now with his own microphone and he’s shaking his head furiously!
The Visual Prophet: That’s exactly what WE wanted to hear! Hell yeah, bitches! You two want to challenge us! We Acc-
Drake King: No!
The Visual Prophet: I said we acce-
Drake King: No!!
The Visual Prophet: Dude…I’m trying to say, Drake King and I ACC-
Drake King: No, no, NO! Stop this foolishness right now!
(SASS and Viz look confused as Drake is turning red in the face. Drake is standing in between Viz on stage and SASS in the ring as he makes his way to the middle of the ramp and creating distance between his partner and their Voltage challengers.)
Drake King: Look, you did not have my permission when you went to Voltage to antagonize those two girls and you do not have my permission to accept any challenge, Viz. I can’t believe you are trying to force this issue when you KNOW what it means to me. I can’t believe you would disobey my wishes and keep at it with this nonsense. I don’t know what’s wrong with you, I don’t know what screws are loose, what brain cells are missing, or if you just never had any semblance of common sense but for once in your life STOP TALKING AND LISTEN TO ME! I am saying to you…
(Drake turns from Viz and turns to SASS.)
Drake King: And I’m saying to you two. We will not be having any tag team title matches without my approval. I dont feel this situation is right and with Viz making decisions for both of us without my authority on the matter and you two seemingly so eager to jump in the ring with us…I feel like something is off.
The Visual Prophet: Look, best friend. I didn’t mean to go behind your back.
Sarah Price: Yes you did, that’s why you did it.
Sierra Bradford: Yeah, you happily did it without his knowledge.
The Visual Prophet: I mean…ok, yeah. It was fun, we had fun.
Sierra Bradford: Debatable.
Sarah Price: I’m pretty sure you stole my underwear.
The Visual Prophet: Look, Drake…buddy, friend, my brother! I believe we can make history by taking these two out and proving to all we are the best tag team ever. No other team exists that’s as hyped up as these two creepy Mean Girls watching, animated Bratz dolls looking, Forever 21 even though they are clearly over 21 bitches! Especially that Sierra Brad-
Drake King: You do not mention Sierra!
Sierra Bradford: Or what?
(Drake turns and stares at Sierra.)
Sierra Bradford: Hey, babe. You seem so defensive of me. But, maybe you should get over that. Three of the four members of this potential title match are all in agreement. You want this match Viz?
The Visual Prophet: Oh, I want it bad sweetheart!
Sierra Bradford: I know what Sarah wants.
Sarah Price: I want their gold. I want their gold REALLY badly myself!
Sierra Bradford: And I’m saying to everybody watching at home and you especially Drake…I want this match more than ANYTHING and EVERYTHING! I want this match and I want SASS to be the team that stops this Drizzy and Vizzy hype train in its tracks. I know you are thinking with your heart and that’s lovely. I appreciate what you THINK you’re doing by denying this match. But, save it. We don’t want sympathy or pity. We don’t want protection especially from our opponents. We want a chance to prove ourselves as the best tag team in EAW. We want our opportunity to show the world we are the best tag team going today. We didn’t get to be the ones to beat Heavenly Hell, that was you. So, how about we just take you out and take those belts like we wanted to do to Constance and Minerva? Look, 3/4s of the people here want this to happen. It’s just you playing coy, Drake. How can you look yourself in the mirror as the only double champion and know that you ducked the one team most qualified to face you?
Drake King: Sierra…
The Visual Prophet: Drake, bro. IF you REALLY don’t want to face these two, I support you more than anything. Trolling aside, I know its
Drake King: You want this match so badly huh?
Sierra Bradford: I want it more than ANYTHING ELSE IN MY LIFE…
Drake King: …
The Visual Prophet: :lupe:
Sarah Price: :mjgrin:
Flannery McCoy: :wow:
Jake Mercer: :blessed:
(The silence is abundant as Drake lowers his head. Viz is frozen as Sarah winks at Sierra who takes a gulp and feigns confidence in herself. Drake’s hair covers his eyes as he tilts his head up with the microphone to his lips.)
Drake King: This is what you want…fine. SASS vs Drake and Viz for the unified tag team championships. The match is on. Grand Rampage is where we will settle this mess once and for all.
Stew-O: What an announcement! Drake King cocedes and it looks like we have ourselves a title match!
Jake Mercer: GRAND RAMPAGE IS LIT!!!!!
Drake King: But…I’m not losing…
The Visual Prophet: SHIT! You are not losing SHIT to these two band camp lesbians! Don’t you even worry about that L word, Drizzle! We aren’t losing SHIT to Sierra or Sarah or Samantha or Sasha or any broads with S in their names! We are the best tag team EVER! EVER EVER EEVVVVVVEER GOD DAMN IT! Fucking hell, I miss my little Propheets in the stands going nuts when I go in like this but safety comes first. What comes next is simply; Drizzy and Vizzy kicking ya’ll ass all night and remaining the tag team champs! Grand Rampage is going to be a movie!
Sarah Price: So much talk. So much noise. So much lip flapping with not a single important thing coming out of your glossy lips. Yap, yap, yap. We will see who’s the last one talking after we beat you two and take those belts. See you at GR!
Sierra Bradford: Good luck, Drake.
Drake King: …I can’t believe…
(Drake turns and walks up the ramp as Viz is on stage gyrating his hips. Sierra and Sarah remain in the ring as Sarah mocks Viz and Sierra stares at Drake leaving the scene. Bradford has a look of concern on her face as her and Drake’s moods are polar opposite to Sarah and Viz.)
Stew-O: This is a huge matchup and it sucks fans likely won’t be there to see it live!
Flannery McCoy: IF there is any team going today that can possibly stop Drizzy and Vizzy, I’d be willing to bet on SASS to be the team to do them in!
Jake Mercer: I am a SASS stan but I can’t go against CHAMP CHAMP and KANG VIZZY!
(The scene fades out with a zoomed in shot of Viz on stage gyrating his hips, biting his lips, and his Tag team gold shining brightly before we head for a commercial break.)
(Toys R Us commercial starring Kassidy Heart)
(Dynasty comes back on air as Stephie Love is in the middle of the ring)
Stephie Love: The following contest is the ten man BATTLE ROYAL MATCH!
Stephie Love: The only way to eliminate your opponent is by sending them over the top rope and both feet must touch the ground. The last man that remains in the ring will be granted a late entrant into the twelfth annual Grand Rampage match!
Stephie Love: Here are your battle royal participants! W1LH3LM! Dray Fontana! Osamu Arcichida! Mike Gambino! Angel de Plata Jr! Gwyn Gilfried! Hevel! El Landerson! Melissa O’Malley! And Lisa Wren!
(The referee is shown outside the ring signalling to the timekeeper for the match to begin)
(DING! DING! DING!)
Stew-O: And this ten man Battle Royal should be an interesting one. Ten competitors, count’em. Ten names that we’ve become quite familiar with over the course of this season at different points are participating in this match with the winner receiving a pretty good opportunity to make a good impression in this year’s Grand Rampage! Lisa Wren and Melissa O’Malley already have the right idea of how to work the chains of a match like this as you see them trying to eliminate Gwyn Gilfried, but Gwyn is doing a good job of using his ring awareness as he uses the ropes to keep from being an easy prey this early!
Flannery McCoy: Indeed. You said it, Stew, and for quite a few it’s a chance to make a good first impression as it will be their very first appearance! We see Hevel and Dray Fontana trading shots! Irish whip by Dray to Hevel but he transitions into a short arm clothesline that’s ducked by Hevel! Sucker punch below the belt by Hevel to Dray which is completely legal in a match like this! Dray keels over in obvious pain but Hevel gives him no time to recover! Spear to the corner by Hevel to Dray Fontana! Osamu Arcichida attacks from behind on the newcomer Hevel! Clubbing blows to the back by Osamu, and now he’s trying to get Hevel over the top rope but Hevel is trying to fight off the Orchestrator of Violence! And of course, folks, as has been well documented all over the world, if you’ve been following our broadcast of Dynasty every Friday night then you may have just learned last week that with the rest of the South American Tour being cancelled we no longer will be having arenas full of fans! With COVID-19 in full effect all across the globe, it’s a wonder we can still bring you all the action that you’ve come to know and love! But here we are, and we’re proud to still have you watching!
Jake Mercer: What Flannery means to acknowledge is that we should be thanking Gawd Given Greatness, Chris Elite, for saving us! Who knows how badly the Coronaviris would spread if this timely action wasn’t taken! Could you imagine not being able to see me on a television screen anymore because of some virus that’s been named after a famous beer brand created out of Mexico, but has no direct relation? :confused:
Stew-O: At any rate, we have live action going on in the ring. Each of these competitors vying for a golden opportunity to forward their drive toward Pain For Pride, making their case because the Grand Rampage lays the path to that event and it could be any one of these competitors going on to receive a late entrant! Angel De Plata Jr with chops to the chest of El Landerson, and now Landerson sent to the ropes! Baseball slide under Angel! Landerson headscissors on Angel, NO! Angel blocks the intended reverse DDT by Landerson! Hurricanrana by Angel on Landerson, NO! W1LH3LM cuts Angel off with a jumping calf kick that takes Landerson out of the picture for a moment! Axe and smash by W1LH3LM to Angel De Plata Jr, that axe kick plus discus slap combination which knocks Angel down to the canvas! Now El Landerson with a kick from behind that knocks W1LH3LM down to his knees draped over the second rope! Here comes EL Landerson following up with that Tiger Feint Kick that sends W1LH3LM falling back to the canvas!
Flannery McCoy: This action is a little much to keep up with, folks watching at home, but we’ll do our best! Now Lisa Wren with forearm from behind to Melissa O’Malley, taking her by surprise, as she’s now grabbing her by the leg, but Melissa is putting up quite a bit of resistance, she’s desperately kicking at the midsection and now the head of Lisa Wren! Lisa let’s go and O’Malley is free! O’Malley runs at Lisa Wren who was looking for a lariat but O’Malley ducks and bounces off the ropes coming back, and a spinning wheel kick to Lisa Wren takes her down to the canvas! O’Malley yells for Lisa Wren to rise up, and Wren walks right into a body slam! Mike Gambino grabs Melissa from behind and then turns her around, now Gambino with back to back shoulder uppercuts! Melissa is whipped back into the ropes! And a snap suplex by Gambino that takes Melissa O’Malley down again! The action is picking up by the minute!
Jake Mercer: I’ll concur there, but some apparently can’t keep it in the ring. We have Gwyn Gilfried and W1LH3LM are battling outside near the barricade area, the referee is not there to count them out or disqualify these competitors. Both men went through the ropes and not over the top rope! (Replay shows Gwyn Gilfried tossing W1LH3LM through the ropes to the floor.)
Stew-O: Gilfried has been in the mix a good deal lately when it comes to the New Breed Championship, coming real close Reckless Wiring to becoming New Breed Champion. Gwyn Gilfried sliding back into the ring while W1LH3LM is trying to recover just to our left. Osamu Arcichida and Gwyn Gilfried start trading shots now. Osamu ducks an attempt by Gilfried and wraps him up from behind, and a sharp elbow shot from Gilfried that staggers Osamu slightly! Gilfried now absorbing some forearm strikes from Osamu who’s striking back! Gilfried looks to retaliate with a wild swinging clothesline but Osamu ducks it and a backstabber by Osamu! Hevel now trying to land some haymakers on Osamu but Osamu quickly puts an end to that! Osamu Arcichida has taken control of Hevel and now has the upper hand after that devastating sidekick to the gut of Hevel! Now Osamu trying to grab Hevel up and dump him over the top rope! For the moment it looks as though Osamu has a little insurance in the form of Dray Fontana who was looking for retribution from earlier after Hevel surprised Dray with some early offense!
Flannery McCoy: One thing you won’t see in this type of match is a lot of focus on putting in quality wrestling! This is all about outsmarting your opposition until you’re the last man Standing. There’s some luck involved but if you have great ring awareness in a match like this that could bode well for one’s chances in a bigger match such as the Grand Rampage. Osamu and Dray just about have Hevel over the top rope! But now Gwyn Gilfried is back in this, and he’s just grabbed Osamu Arcichida from behind! German suplex by Gilfried! Osamu lands hard on his head, that one took the Orchestrator of Violence by surprise! Gwyn backs Osamu into the corner and throws a couple of euro uppercuts at Osamu and then throws him to his knees on all fours, and now Gwyn backs up a few paces and takes off! Osamu trying to avoid the penalty kick of Gwyn but it’s too late! Gwyn got all of that, connecting with the head of Osamu Arcichida, and Osamu is somewhere else now! Blinding Lights by W1LH3LM! The hard headbutt knocked Gilfried off his feet! Gilfried hurries to recover! BLINDING LIGHTS AGAIN! Gilfried taking some punishment now! W1LH3LM has Gilfried wrapped up from behind around the neck, now flips Gilfried over his shoulder right into the painmaker! The inverted butterfly stunner! What a maneuver! W1LH3LM is back in this thing!
Jake Mercer: I personally think this is great! I feel like having no fans actually to show their obnoxious faces in person is gonna make our TV ratings blow right through the roof to make up for the sum getting taken out of my paycheck, which could double our bonuses for events like Grand Rampage and Pain For Pride! Woohoo!!! Hahahaha!!! Hope you fans at home enjoy your cooking, I’m sure some of you needed to lay off the hotdogs and nachos anyhow!
Stew-O/Flannery McCoy: :skip:
Stew-O: At any rate, fans, we apologize, please excuse Jake’s comments, his sentiments aren’t shared from this end in the least! We always look forward to bringing you nothing but the best action live every Friday night! Due to conditions out of our control with COVID-19 pandemic, please note that everything Elite Answers Wrestling does is for you, the fans. At this time we’re just taking every precaution with you all in mind as well as these great competitors you get to see weekly on Dynasty, Showdown, and Voltage respectively! So we do thank you for joining us here on Friday night Dynasty! Mike Gambino is really looking good here! Clothesline on Angel De Plata Jr, and now the Lionsault on Angel De Plata Jr! Side kick to the midsection of El Landerson! Now a kick to the midsection of O’Malley! And SWEET DREAMS to O’Malley! The double Underhook DDT! Now Hevel from behind to stop the momentum of Mike Gambino, who was about to explode it seemed! El Landerson with a Tiger Feint Kick right into the Landerson 619 on Hevel!
Flannery McCoy: This sends Hevel flying back, but not for long because here comes Dray Fontana with THE PARAMOUNT! THAT MODIFIED SHINING WIZARD TO THE HEAD OF HEVEL! What a shot by Dray Fontana! Here comes Mike Gambino back on the attack, but a superkick floors Gambino! Here comes Gwyn Gilfried trying wrap up Fontana and lock on a hold-backstabber by Fontana to Gilfried! And Dray Fontana is on a role now! Fontana is on the run and now Fontana meets Osamu Arcichida, but Osamu ducks under and now catches Dray with a kick to the gut right into CLASSIVE AGGRESSIVE! The muscle buster on Dray Fontana, and now Fontana is down! Wild back and forth action here, and there looks to be no end in sight!
Jake Mercer: Melissa O’Malley just took a shot to the head the likes I’ve not seen in some time and it’s knocked clean over the top rope, but she’s hanging on just outside on our side on the apron! That shot courtesy of Lisa Wren! (Replay shows Lisa Wren with a cheap kick from behind to the head while O’Malley was backing up unsuspecting, this sending her over the top rope.) Wren with a boot to the throat of O’Malley but O’Malley hanging on for dear life! El Landerson and Angel De Plata Jr who are both trading blows! El Landerson gets Irish whipped to the ropes but Landerson hangs on! Here comes Angel on the attack but El Landerson baited the hook and Angel went for it and hits the ropes! Clothesline by Angel sends Landerson over the top rope but he lands on the apron! But Angel works a kick in which connects with the midsection of El Landerson, but he shakes it off as Angel De Plata Jr was going for a forearm attempt that’s ducked! El Landerson has a hold on Angel De Plata Jr from behind! Angel is trapped, and here comes Hevel in to take advantage! Hevel getting some good cheap shots in! THE TERMINATOR! THAT DEVASTATING FRONT KICK TO THE FACE! BUT HE HIT El LANDERSON! ANGEL DODGED A BULLET RIGHT BETWEEN THE EYES! HEVEL DOESN’T SEEM TO CARE!
El Landerson: ¿Estoy fuera? ¿Cómo puede ser esto? Entrené tan duro?
Stephie Love: El Landerson…. unfortunately has been eliminated! :(:(:(
Jake Mercer: Well, that’s just sad. Isn’t it? The greatest luchador of all time has been eliminated, and I could honestly care less. I had him picked to win on nobody’s ballot, so get over it.
Stew-O: And we just witnessed the first elimination of the match, folks at home. El Landerson and Hevel were doubling up to try and take Angel De Plata Jr out! Both men paid dearly for it, especially El Landerson who just got eliminated! Hevel continues to go to work on Angel De Plata Jr landing clubbing blows to the back of Angel! Wild sucker punch by Hevel misses its mark, Angel with a Lou Thesz Press on Hevel! Hevel stumbles back to his feet but Angel on the offensive with a diving bulldog that takes Hevel back down to the canvas! Here comes Gwyn Gilfried back into the picture but he just took a flying thrust kick right to the chops! Mike Gambino grabs Gilfried and tosses him over, and Gilfried is gone from the match!
Stephie Love: Gwyn Gilfried has been eliminated!
Flannery McCoy: Gwyn Gilfried has been eliminated, which comes as a surprise because here was a man that has been in the mix for the New Breed Championship, and has seen the main event recently! He certainly doesn’t look happy as his slapping the apron in frustration can attest to. W1LH3LM has the one leg Boston Crab locked in on Angel De Plata Jr, but Angel turns and reverses it! Angel kicks W1LH3LM away! Angel De Plata Jr Kip’s up, and a baseball slide as W1LH3LM was looking to connect with the axe & smash kick! Hurricanrana by Angel, NO! It’s being blocked by W1LH3LM! He’s lifting Angel up over his head! What’s he gonna do here!!?? W1LH3LM turns around and he’s now facing toward the outside, he’s still holding Angel up! Angel De Plata Jr trying to fight off W1LH3LM, he’s fighting off! Clubbing blows to the head, W1LH3LM trying to dump Angel out, will he do it!!??? BLINDING LIGHTS! ANGEL DE PLATA JR FALLS TO THE A SITTING POSITION! NOW HE’S TRYING TO-NO! Angel instinctively rolls back under the bottom rope! He’s safe.
Jake Mercer: We have eight competitors remaining in this match as two have gone by the wayside. Lisa Wren, Dray Fontana, Melissa O’Malley, W1LH3LM, Hevel, Angel De Plata Jr, Mike Gambino, and Osamu Arcichida! One of these competitors will be leaving here with a huge opportunity right in the palm of their hands! It’s a chance to guarantee you’ll be in a great position to win the Grand Rampage! O’Malley is trying to battle with Hevel, slugging it out!
Stew-O: This has to be the part of the match where those who are so accustomed to brawling and slugging it out have a distinct advantage over technical wrestlers. Pinfalls and submissions don’t count! O’Malley getting the better of the exchange….or SO WE THOUGHT UNTIL HEVEL RESPONDS WITH ANOTHER VICIOUS HEADBUTT…. Hevel however turns right around into a doubleteam SUPERKIIIIIIIICK COURTESY OF Mike Gambino and Dray Fontana! O’Malley finishes Hevel off with a clothesline sending him up over and out!
Stephie Love: Hevel has been eliminated!
Flannery McCoy: And then there were seven! MIKE GAMBINO! HE CATCHES DRAY FONTANA BY SURPRISE, ELIMINATING HIM! DRAY IS OUT AND AS HE GETS UP TO HIS FEET HE REALIZES IT’S OVER!
Stephie Love: Dray Fontana has been eliminated!
Jake Mercer: The numbers are getting thin here! Every competitor, as you can see, have not wasted a second of their golden opportunity to take what they believe should be theirs! Melissa O’Malley, the young woman. She’s screaming in her loudest voice! She is screaming at the top of her lungs for Lisa Wren to release the hold she has locked in now! Lisa has that crossface Indian deathlock applied!
Stew-O: For folks just tuning in at home, it’s been a good one here so far on Friday night Dynasty! Starr Stan put together this ten man over the top rope battle royal, a match that presents the winner with a late entrant number in this year’s Grand Rampage. Only Hall of Famers Masters and Devan Dubian have won as late entries, winning at numbers 24 and 30 respectively! Dubian being a co-winner the year he won it.
Flannery McCoy: Indeed. Lisa Wren grabbed from behind by those dreadlocks of her’s, being taken by surprise! She’s being grabbed up by Osamu Arcichida! German suplex by Osamu Arcichida! He grabs Lisa up again, yanking her up this time like a rag doll turns her around! CLASSIVE AGGRESSIVE! OSAMU GRABS LISA AND TOSSESS HER LIMP BODY OVER THE TOP ROPE!
Stephie Love: Lisa Wren has been eliminated!
Jake Mercer: This match is getting more exciting by the second! We’ve only got five fighters left though now so the end is sight! Osamu and Mike Gambino start battling it out, jockeying for position! Gambino being overpowered at the moment! Melissa O’Malley continues fighting on, now going at it against W1LH3LM! But here comes Angel De Plata Jr getting into the mix! He starts punching at both O’Malley and W1LH3LM indiscriminately! O’Malley coming back with a GLADIUS KICK!!! IT WAS MEANT FOR ANGEL DE PLATA JR, BUT THAT SUPERKICK MISSES! W1LH3LM GRABS O’MALLEY FROM BEHIND! SHE’S BEEN FIGHTING HARD TO HOLD HER OWN AS THE GLADIATRIX OF THE EAW! BUT SHE’S STRUGGLING RIGHT NOW! W1LH3LM HAS O’MALLEY UP OVER HIS HEAD, BUT O’MALLEY GOUGING AT THE EYES OF W1LH3LM! W1LH3LM DROPS O’MALLEY AND SHE HITS THE CANVAS HARD! WHAT’S GONNA HAPPEN!!?? HOW’S IT ALL GOING TO END!!???
Flannery McCoy: Mike Gambino getting overwhelmed by the onslaught of shoot kicks and forearm strikes of Osamu Arcichida, decides to distance himself from the Orchestrator of Violence! Now Angel De Plata Jr taking his shots at Osamu Arcichida, Osamu is covering up quite well! Headlock by Osamu to reel Angel in to stop these close fist shots! Mike Gambino getting his shots from W1LH3LM, the man that’s showing how relentless he is. He won’t give in, DEATH BY W1LH3LM! That back suplex double knee backbreaker finisher! Mike Gambino is down!
Jake Mercer: Melissa O’Malley is back in this! She grabs Angel De Plata Jr from behind by his legs and tries to put Angel over the top rope! Osamu lends a hand, a temporary alliance of sorts it seems! Angel resisting, holding the ropes, wrapping his legs in the ropes! It’s all about strategy, every man and woman for themselves! W1LH3LM JUST DUMPED MELISSA O’MALLEY OVER THE TOP ROPE! O’MALLEY HITS THE FLOOR!
Stephie Love: Melissa O’Malley has been eliminated!
Stew-O: W1LH3LM catches a vicious elbow to the face from Osamu Arcichida before he starts working over Angel De Plata Jr again but Angel De Plata Jr with a step up enzigiri! DDT on Osamu by Angel De Plata Jr! Finally slowing the progress of the former World Heavyweight Championship number one contender, Osamu…..ARE YOU KIDDING ME! MIKE GAMBINO THROWS ANGEL DE PLATA JR OUT OF THE RING TO THE FLOOR! WHERE IS THE HONOR IN THAT!? WHAT AN OPPORTUNIST!
Stephie Love: Angel De Plata has been eliminated!
Flannery McCoy: The action continues as W1LH3LM springs his way back into action by attacking Mike Gambino, who was ready for it! Backfist to the face that knocks W1LH3LM for a loop, chest chops now! Mike Gambino with a new burst of energy! Where’s he getting it!? Knee strike to the midsection! Headbutt by Mike Gambino to W1LH3LM! W1LH3LM is on the ropes! More hard chops to the chest! But W1LH3LM turns it around, now Gambino is on the ropes! Repeated forearm shots to the face by W1LH3LM to Mike Gambino! BLINDING LIGHTS! THE STIFF HEADBUTT! DAMN HE’S GOT A HARD HEAD! BOTH MEN TRYING TO JOCKEY FOR POSITION AS A LEAN ON THOSE ROPES! THEY’RE TRYING TO FIND A WAY TO GET THE OTHER OVER!
Jake Mercer: Normally this is where morons at home would be heard getting all excited because of the drama built up through the final dramatic moments of a match like this, and you’d be leaning one way or the other but luckily we don’t have to put up with that! Hahahaha!
Stew-O: Folks, you’ll have to excuse my broadcast partner, he’s kind of gone off script with no filter! But he’s right, these final moments will prove to be crucial! W1LH3LM has beaten men much larger than Mike Gambino but I’m not sure if he can say he’s beaten someone this intense! The two of them tie up and W1LH3LM manages to slip behind, he goes for a German Suplex but Mike Gambino counters with a headbutt! W1LH3LM lets go…and Mike Gambino immediately pulls him in for a powerbomb!
Flannery McCoy: This is not good for W1LH3LM! He’s been fighting nearly the entire time while Mike has been able to pick his spots and make this look much easier than it is! He has W1LH3LM right where he needs him to be, he should just throw him over and be done with it. He’s toying with W1LH3LM, and W1LH3LM is not someone you want to mess around with. Wait a minute! W1LH3LM powers out, a vicious uppercut and then a slap to the face STAGGERS MIKE GAMBINO! GAMBINO LANDS SOME PUNCHES, ELBOWS, KNEES, ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING HE CAN MUSTER! BOTH MEN GOING BACK AND FORTH! W1LH3LM SEIZES CONTROL, BUT WAIT A MINUTE! OSAMU ARCICHIDA! HE’S BACK! AND HE JUST LEAPT OFF THE TOP WITH A DROPKICK! HE CALLS IT TAKING FLIGHT! HE JUST TOOK OUT W1LH3LM! MIKE GAMBINO ENDS UP BEHIND OSAMU! OSAMU RISING BACK TO HIS FEET! ONE OF THE FAVORITES FROM THE BEGINNING COULD BE TAKEN OUT HERE! HE WAS JUST COMPETING AGAINST THE LIKES OF DRAKE KING AND TLA AT RECKLESS WIRING FOR THE WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP! WHAT AN UPSET THIS WOULD BE!!
Jake Mercer: GAMBINO HAS BEEN OPPORTUNISTIC THIS WHOLE MATCH, PICKING HIS SPOTS, AND HE’S LOOKING TO DO IT AGAIN! OSAMU TURNS AROUND! THE BLACK OUT! THE SICK KICK! NO! HE MISSED! HIS MOMENTUM JUST TOOK HIM INTO THE ROPES WHERE HE’S TANGLED! THE YOUNG MAN REALIZES HE IS IN TROULBE TRYING TO ESCAPE BUT HE CANNOT! NOW W1LH3LM AND OSAMU ARCICHIDA ARE WORKING TOGETHER TO GRAB UP MIKE GAMBINO THE MERCENARY BY HIS LEGS! THEY GOT HIM UP! HE’S TRYING TO HOLD ON, BUT HE CAN’T! THE STRENGTH OF TWO MEN AND THE LONG PERIOD IN WHICH HE’S SPENT IN THIS MATCH HAS TAKEN IT’S TOLL! THEY HAVE HIM OVER THE TOP ROPE! GAMBINO FALLS TO THE FLOOR!
Stephie Love: Mike Gambino has been eliminated!
(Mike Gambino slaps the mat on the floor in complete and utter frustrating fashion. He gets up with the same angry expression, having come so close to winning.)
Stew-O: GERMAN SUPLEX! OSAMU STRIKES FIRST WITH A BACKSTABBER ON W1LH3LM! OSAMU IS RUNNING ‘E’, SO IS W1LH3LM! BOTH MEN BACK TO THEIR FEET! W1LH3LM sends Osamu to the corner! He smartly takes his time and conserves some of his energy as he makes his way over to the corner where Osamu is. BOP AND BANG! THAT STRAIGHT RIGHT TO THE TIRED OSAMU! Northern lights suplex by W1LH3LM to Osamu! W1LH3LM has Osamu up again, he hasn’t released him! Another Northern lights suplex takes Osamu down again! And he’s still not releasing Osamu! One more!!?? NO! OSAMU BLOCKS THE TRIFECTA OF NORTHERN LIGHTS SUPLEXES! A VICIOUS KNEE TO THE GUT BY OSAMU TO W1LH3LM! ANOTHER! AND ANOTHER! OSAMU COUNTERS AND NOW WHAT’S HE DOING!!?? HE’S GOT HIS BACK TO THE ROPES AND HE HASN’T RELEASED W1LH3LM! IS HE GOING TO TRY TO SUPLEX HIM OUT OF……OH MY GOD! OSAMU WITH ‘THE BEST’ NORTHERN LIGHTS SUPLEX IN THE BUSINESS THAT SENDS W1LH3LM OVER AND OUT OF THE RING!
(DING DING DING!!!)
(‘Sensei’ by Dastik plays as Osamu Arcichida stumbles back holding his arms up in victory. The referee is there to make it official.)
Stephie Love: W1LH3LM has been eliminated!… Therefore the winner and receiving a late entry into the Grand Rampage match!….OSAMU!!!!!!!! ARCICHIDA!!!!!!!!
Flannery McCoy: Well, it’s not exactly winning the big match just yet, but there’s denying that this man has just stamped his ticket to a late entry in and given himself likely one of the greatest chances of anyone to WIN the Grand Rampage match!
Jake Mercer: That he did! Osamu Arcichida has been battling all season for opportunities to get to the top, and he’s done it again by earning a late number and now all he needs to do is go and outlast 29 other competitors come April 19th!
Stew-O: Congratulations to Osamu Arcichida. This is an important win, a momentum booster as we close in on the thirteenth annual Grand Rampage. A good effort by the other nine participating competitors in the match. Most all of them showed us something we could all be seeing from them going forward, and a few may have very bright futures ahead! But tonight, your winner…Osamu Arcichida!
(The last shot shows Osamu Arcichida making his way up the ramp nodding his head, knowing he’s put himself in a good position come Grand Rampage. He makes his way through the curtain as the scene fades.)
Voiceover: In the briminal justice system, dickeating based offenses are considered especially heinous in Elite Answers Wrestling, the dedicated detectives who investigate these vicious felonies are known as an elite squad known as the Bozo Victims Unit. These are their stories.
“I’M SO APPALLED”
(The scene opens up to a shooting range where Detective SKabler is shown training Shaker Jones to use an AK.)
Detective SKabler: You hold it sideways like that and you really gonna have them shook.
Shaker Jones: I always have them shook.
Detective SKabler: You right. You right. Isn’t that right Ahre-
(The camera pans to the side showing that nobody is there.)
Detective SKabler: I’m glad we have this time together just ourselves Shaker. The dickeating presence is gone and now we can focus on solving the most important crimes the BVU has ever undertaken.
Shaker Jones: It is the worst pandemic that humanity has ever faced. But with your help I am prepared.
(The camera pans down to show Shaker is wearing a surgical mask over his crotch to prevent dickeating.)
Detective SKabler: Nice. You really thought ahead. Good work Shaker I feel that a promotion and a raise for you is coming very soon!
(Shaker is shown smiling happily as he celebrates by firing off the AK into the ceiling.)
Detective SKabler: Shittin’ me.
Shaker Jones: But Chris why didn’t you fire that dickeater Cage after what he did on Dynasty? He ate so much dick it was like an all-you-can-eat buffet out there!
Detective SKabler: It sure was Shaker. It was like he became the Xander of dickeating. But don’t worry. I have a plan.
Shaker Jones: Yay!
Detective SKabler: Set the damn gun down! Iight so here’s what is going to happen. I could have easily just fired Cageater. It would have been so simple. Just snap and the little bitch is no longer stalking me like I am with my ex. Wait no I mean she’s stalking me. Desperate to get that D. But in any case I’m not interested in making things simple. I am going to kill Cage slowly and savor every minute of it!
Shaker Jones: You probably shouldn’t be talking about killing people at the police station.
Detective SKabler: Why do you think I joined the police?
Shaker Jones: To solve crimes and make the world a better and safer place!!!
Detective SKabler: :mjlol: !!!!!
Shaker Jones: :mjgrin:
Detective SKabler: I am going to kill Cage softly and that is why I have some important announcements to make. I’m going to fuck Cage up at the Grand Rampage but everyone already knows that. Everyone except for Cage it seems. Cage thinks that shit is going to be sweet at the Grand Rampage. But he is an idiot. Cage is extending his dickeating to new levels. So I am going to be extending this Grand Rampage to new levels! That’s right Shaker. We are officially going to be extending this Grand Rampage… to 40 people!!!
Shaker Jones: Wow! That’s like ten more people than normal!
Detective SKabler: It sure is little buddy. Ten more people that Cage has no chance of beating. Imagine thinking that I give a fuck how Cage gets taken out of this match. As long as he is out then he is out.
Shaker Jones: Yep! As long as he goes over the top rope and both feet hit the floor!
Detective SKabler: Lmao nah fuck all that. If Cage even so much as goes through the bottom or the middle rope it’s an elimination. Fuck outta here.
Shaker Jones: That’s going to have Cage shook!
Detective SKabler: He had no chance anyway. Let’s see how long this pathetic oldhead can last now! Hope he doesn’t break a hip!!!
Shaker Jones: Akekekeke
(Suddenly Detective Biggums and Detective Ty busts through the door breathing heavily.)
Detective SKabler: What’s wrong men?
Detective Ty: It’s… it’s…
Detective Biggums: It’s the dickeatery sir! It’s even bigger than ever!
Detective SKabler: My god…
Detective Ty: It’s Kassidy Heart sir! She’s out of control! If she continues to eat this much dick there won’t be any left by morning!
Detective Biggums: I need my dick man! We can’t let it get eaten! Not again!
Detective SKabler: You are right men. This is a true high priority mission for the BVU. The survival of this very planet depends upon it. Kassidy Heart must be stopped. Where is she?
Detective Ty: That’s what we are trying to tell you sir! She’s… she’s…
Detective Biggums: She’s with Mr. DEDEDE right now!
Detective SKabler: Shittin’ me… Be prepared detectives. You too Shaker. It is time to put your training to good use. But be warned… Kassidy Heart’s dickeating crimes will be especially heinous. With BVU’s new social distancing guidelines she is supposed to keep 6 feet of distance at all times. If she is dickeating… well I ain’t gonna believe that Mr. DEDEDE is packing all that.
Detective Biggums: She’s gotta be closer!
Detective Ty: If it was me she’d need to be millimeters in distance just for the tip…
Detective SKabler: Aye yo… that is not what anyone wanted to hear. Get the straps!!!
(A montage is shown of the Bozo Victims Unit suiting up for their firsr mission without Ahren. “Feeling” by Pop Smoke plays over the montage as Detective SKabler is shown wiping away a tear as he remembers all the good times they shared together. With Pop that is. Not Ahren.)
Detective SKabler: Be on your guard team. I am sending strong eatery on these streets.
(The camera fades in to a luxurious mansion which looks like it is on fire. The BVU unit with their AKs held sideways sneaks in past the swimming pool and shatters a glass window. The BVU quickly leaps through into the interior of the house.)
Detective Ty: It’s empty! Was it a false report?
Detective SKabler: No. My eater senses never lie. She’s here. She’s hungry. She’s… starving.
Detective Biggums: I heard something… from the bedroom?
Detective SKabler: Good thinking. Kassidy is in her natural environment.
Shaker Jones: I thought that was the kitchen?
Detective SKabler: Perhaps that is where she should be… but the dickeater works in mysterious ways. Instead of making a sandwich this renegade criminal is too focused on feeding herself. The audacity!
Detective Ty: You hate to see it.
Shaker Jones: The caucasity!
(The BVU like ninjas makes their way silently up the stairs. Sounds of dickeating can be heard growing louder and louder in volume as they approach. Suddenly as they reach the bedroom Detective SKabler begins a countdown from five… before kicking the door down and charging in with his squad of armed officers!!!)
Detective SKabler: FREEZE! ON YOUR KNEES!
“Kassidy Heart”: Hahaha I’m already on my knees beloved.
(The scene comes into focus as a kneeling Kassidy Heart is shown in front of “Mr. DEDEDE” who is tied up and gagged to a wooden cross in the bedroom. Sheets have been thrown all over the room. “Kassidy’s” makeup has been smeared all over her face giving her a deranged look.)
Detective SKabler: Stop this and come with us down to the station. Nobody needs to get hurt here.
“Kassidy Heart”: Hurt? HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Nobody is going to get hurt here except your chances of being a main eventer in this company! Once I eat this dick… the title shots will fall like I do for my man! Right into my lap!!!
Detective SKabler: This is unfair!
“Kassidy Heart”: Life is unfair sweetums. Now let’s get to feastin’…
Shaker Jones: Wait!
Detective SKabler: What is it rookie?
Shaker Jones: She can’t do it! Look she hasn’t eaten yet!!!
(The BVU moves in closer as they realize that “Kassidy Heart” is using a microscope in her attempts to dickeat.)
“Kassidy Heart”: It’s not what it looks like! Just give me some more time. I’m from down under! I’m a pro at things like this!
Detective Biggums: You may be from down under. But you about to be six feet under bitch.
“Kassidy Heart”: NO! I WILL DO IT! I WILL EAT THIS DICK!!!
(Loud munching sounds are heard as the BVU swiftly moves in to pry “Kassidy” away from “DEDEDE”. Kassidy is quickly put into handcuffs which Shaker forgot to bring. Luckily she had plenty lying around the bedroom.)
“Kassidy Heart”: Ugh! I would have gotten away with it too if it wasn’t for you meddling kids!
Detective Ty: Yeah yeah that’s enough out of you.
Detective SKabler: Good work men. As for this thot… well this year it looks like Eatermania will be held in an empty arena. Because she is going straight to solitary!!! Take her away!!!
(A muzzle is put on “Kassidy” to stop her munching as she is dragged away by the officers. Detective SKabler pats Shaker Jones on the shoulder in a show of respect as the credits roll.)
(COMMERCIAL: This episode of Bozo Victims Unit is sponsored by the Cena29 Dating Service. Find your match today and maybe the next ten years of conjugal will make all that meth worth it!)
(Dynasty comes back on air to Stephie Love in the ring)
Stephie Love – The following tag team contest is scheduled for one fall!
( ‘GATTI’ by Pop Smoke, JACKBOYS plays over the arena’s sound system as Andre Walker makes his way to the ring looking confident and ready )
Stephie Love: Introducing first! From The Big Apple! Weighing in at 185 pounds he is Andre… WAAAAAAALKKEERRRRRRR!!!
Jake Mercer – First match for the man from NYC and he is looking ready!
Flannery McCoy – No doubt he will want to show the Dynasty roster that this man is no joke and wants to make it big for himself!
(I am Revenant by The Distillers hits. Kasey Kaos steps out onto the stage and makes her way down to the ring.)
Stephie Love: And his opponent, from London England, weighing in at 130lbs.. MISSSSS MAYHEMMMMMMM KASEYYYYYYYY KAOSSSSSSSSS!!!!!
Jake Mercer: She was part of a victorious tag team last week taking advantage of some confusion between her opponents! Will she follow up with another win in singles competition tonight?
Flannery McCoy: A win under the guise of opportunity but a win regardless! Kasey will be looking to bring some Kaos to the ring once again tonight!
( DING! DING! DING! )
Stew-O: AND HERE WE GO!! This should be a good one! Both adversaries are meeting at the center of the ring, Kaos looks unhinged and psychotic while Walker wonders what the frick is up with her attitude as she gets in his face foul mouthing him like he was her worst enemy! A Lot of intensity in the young woman who gets to push the man before her. Looking offended he moves in but Kasey throws herself up headbutting Dre under the jaw! Walker is reeling, stumbling backwards which allows Kaos to go on the offense! She picks up her opponent into a scoop slap before dropping down a few precision struck elbows to the heart of her opponent! She then suddenly gets atop of him grabbing him by the hair and wailing at his face with a series of punches and elbows but he shoves her off with strength! Both are not on their knees Walker shaking his head barely believing what is going on while Kasey is giggling madly holding her face and staring at Dre!
Jake Mercer: If anyone had doubts about her level of sanity…
Flannery McCoy: Oh come on Jake.
Stew-O: Kasey screams suddenly and goes to shove Walker into a corner throwing in some elbows to his face once again before following with some kicks to the midsection she is really going hard on the man who tries to block as best he can without much success! She continues her offence with the heel of her boot to his neck choking the man as the referee is beginning his count!
Referee – ONE! TWO!! THREE!! FOUR!!
Stew-O: Kasey lets go of Dre who holds his throat just before she gets disqualified before hugging Walker and delivering a quick snap suplex! Going to a knee behind him she wraps his head around an arm and squeezes into a headlock controlling him on the ground as she takes the early lead into the match so far Walker having no answer against her attacks yet! The referee is checking in on Kasey’s opponent; he signals that he is not giving up as he manages to get to his feet and then yes he is managing to lift himself up with Kaos piggy backed behind him! He goes to where he thinks is a corner wanting to ram her into it but he misjudges and both ends up crashing through the ropes and the outside on the mat surrounding the ring!
Jake Mercer: Well, that got Kaos off of him!
Flannery McCoy: Not what he had in mind I’m sure!
Stew-O: Such a move would normally get the crowd to react but we must be reminded in an empty arena yet again tonight folks so we could clearly hear the sound of bodies colliding with mat on the outside, lucky for them it was not concrete otherwise the story would be different! Kasey is getting up first from the fall looking around holding her head getting her bearings before locating Dre and grabbing him by the hair moving him up into an Irish whip that sends him flying over the barricade and into the first series of empty chairs!! Meanwhile the official is beginning his count!
Referee – ONE! TWO!! THREE!!!
Stew-O: Kasey goes after Walker moving him against the barricade ramming his head into it as he is folded in over it like a piece of drying clothing on a clothesline!
Referee – FOUR!!!! FIVE!!!!! SIX!!!!!!
Stew-O: A few elbows to the back from Kaos who looks up at the referee with death in her eyes but it doesn’t stop him from doing his job which forces her to quickly roll into the ring to interrupt the count. She goes back outside, standing on the apron looking at Dre and leaps forth LEG DROP FROM THE APRON TO THE HEAD OF ANDRE WALKERRRRR!! He flops down on the ground from the ring side of the mat as Kasey gets up yelling victoriously knowing she is in control as the referee begins his count again but she moves a hand to his mouth muffling him trying to keep him quiet calling him names in an annoying fashion while Dre slowly gets back to a vertical base! She looks at Dre who is about to move towards her. She is on the apron again and suddenly turns and leaps!!
Jake Mercer – WOAH!!
Stew-O: SWINGBLADE FROM THE APRON! DOWN GOES WALKER AGAIN!!! Kasey is not wasting much time she raises her downed opponent up and shoves him into the ring she is trying to go for a-
Jake Mercer: COVER!!!
Referee: ONE! TWO!!
Flannery McCoy: DRE KICKS OUT!!!
Stew-O: Kasey’s offensive tonight in this match so far has kept her ahead but not enough to put the New York native out of winning contention and so the match continues on! Slowly Walker is getting up to his feet and he is clipped under the jaw by an European Uppercut from Casey who is not wasting a moment of the opportunity she has not to strike in an attempt to bring the win back home! She sends Walker down hard with a swinging neckbreaker and then wait-no DRE COUNTERS IT INTO HIS OWN NECKBREAKER!! Kasey Kaos is down along with Dre as they both get up together and begins to throw punches at each other in droves which ends up in favor of the smaller-
Jake Mercer: And K-razier…
Flannery McCoy: *Sigh* …
Stew-O: Kasey Kaos who kicks him in the midsection and grabs his head she calls for a DDT BUT SHE GETS FLIPPED INTO A FIREMAN’S CARRY AND THEN A SLAM!! Kasey gets up to her feet but is reeling from that bit of offense from Dre who steps back and dashes forward throwing in a knee for the BLINDING LIGHTS!! The Bicycle Knee Strike connects!! Kasey Kaos is reeling and looks to be in danger as her opponent doesn’t hesitate and calls for one of his finishing maneuvers! He hooks her in for the Arm Trapper Belly to Back Slam! THE FATAL FINALE!!! KAOS GOES DOWN HARD!!! Dre flips her on her back and hooks the legs!
Jake Mercer: COVER!!!
Flannery McCoy: This Could Be It!!
Referee: ONE! TWO!! THREE!!!
( DING! DING! DING! )
( ‘GATTI’ by Pop Smoke, JACKBOYS plays over the arena’s sound system as Andre gets to his knees and the official is moving by his side to raise his hand in victory )
Stephie Love: Here is your winner… Andre WAAAAAAALKEEERRRRR!!!!
Jake Mercer: Convincing showing from the New York native who leaves Pensacola with the win tonight!
Flannery McCoy: Kasey gave a strong showing but in the end it wasn’t enough. Either way the future is bright for both of these up and coming talents here on Dynasty, this is only the beginning for both!
(The broadcast feed transitions to the backstage area of the empty Pensacola Center, where Michael Belfort is standing by in front of the Dynasty backdrop with a microphone in hand. He smirks into the camera lens before introducing his guest at this time.)
Michael Belfort: Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome–Serena Bennett!
(Serena Bennett steps into the frame, someone taken aback by the lack of crowd reaction upon Michael announcing her presence. The broadcast feed cuts briefly to the inside of the empty Pensacola Arena, then back to Serena who appears a bit relieved now that she remembers there aren’t actually any fans in the arena.)
Serena Bennett: How you doin’, Mikey? Washpoppin’ witchu?
Michael Belfort: It’s Michael–
Serena Bennett: Yes, I’m sure it is, but I didn’t ask, now did I? (She winks at him.)
Michael Belfort: (He chuckles.) Sure is good to have you back on Dynasty, Serena, all things considered.
Serena Bennett: Tell me about it, Mikey. Man, the fact that EAW got us in and out of airports as if COVID-19 ain’t a thing is baffling to me. I’m finna bring my private jet in ‘cause fuck all this out ‘n’ about in public mess. And just so we’re clear, I don’t fuck with none of y’all like that, so don’t come askin’ for a ride. The fuck are we still doing out here, man, everybody need to stay they asses at home. The fact that Bhristopher had to be the one to cancel our tour in the first place to keep fans away and safe is one thing–but why the fuck we still goin’ from city to city, Michael?
Serena Bennett: Goddamn. I’d be home myself, but the last thing I need is anybody else tryna tell me Serena Bennett is lookin’ for any more excuses to spend more time at home, to run away from the situation. Somebody’s gotta put food on the table back home, anyway. Plus, I can’t imagine the what some of the members of our EAW Universe is goin’ through. I can’t even fathom knowing that the Grand Rampage might take place inside of an empty arena, that fans aren’t goin’ to be a huge part of the magical experience that is a Grand Rampage match. Shit, I still remember my first one. Those fans made the experience for me, you feel me, Mike? They’re the ones that make it worth it.
Michael Belfort: Um, sure, yes, I suppose I do. But speaking about fans, Serena, a number of your fans were particularly surprised at your decision to abstain from a physical altercation with Impact last week when he interrupted you on the Blue Carpet. Do you have an explanation for them wondering what may have happened to the Serena Bennett we grew to know and love?
(Serena rolls her eyes and lets a light chuckle escape from her lips. She flips her bright blue hair over her shoulder before responding to Michael’s question.)
Serena Bennett: It’s interesting how everybody just expects me to be in a reckless, fighting mood all the time, Mikey. I guess that’s my own fault tho, ain’t it? I made my debut with a promise that I would have smoke for any and everybody who wanted it. That I was never gon’ become the type to back down from a fight. That I would gladly check, correct, or break the necks of anyone who disrespected me, who was runnin’ they mouth, who tried to shit on me. It’s who I established myself to be, someone who wouldn’t tolerate that kinda bratty behavior–it worked very well for me on Empire, didn’t it? I showed them broads I wasn’t somebody to fuck around with, or it was a death sentence for ‘em. It’s who the EAW Universe knows me to be, somebody who should have immediately went apeshit on Impact ‘cause he said a few reckless things to try and hurt my feelings–but that’s exactly what he wanted me to do. He literally told me to hit him. And I wasn’t gon’ give him the satisifaction. See, last week, I knew what Karl was tryna do, he was tryna prove a point, try to show the whole world that I ain’t shit but some angry ass, bitter ass, riled up, violent bitch who keeps pickin’ fights with people for no reason. And I wasn’t gon’ let him have that, no sir. That motherfucker’s audacity don’t phase me, I’m unbothered as ever. He can kiss my ass. While my intolerance for shady, snake-ass, triflin’ behavior says a lot to my audience, I think it speaks volumes that I’m willing to wait for the right stage, the right opportunity to hand Imp’s ass right back to him on a silver platter. I’ve grown. Fuck I look like hittin’ me just ‘cause he says to? If it’s a fight that motherfucker wants with me, then it’s a massacre he finna get. But it’s gon’ me on my terms, when I say so, when–
(A single slow-clap starts up and grows louder and louder as Serena kisses her teeth and folds her arms over her chest. Eventually, Impact makes his way into the frame, smiling devilishly at Serena as he continues to “applaud” her, Michael Belfort standing uncomfortably between them. Impact leans into Michael’s microphone as he finishes his clapping.)
Impact: That’s some riveting shit, Serena. Really. Very moving, exciting work coming from you–I mean, if you’re into the whole meaningless babble desperately lacking in substance. Something for everybody, right? Nah, you might have Milhouse over here fooled, but I see right through your facade. Supposedly now you’re too good to pick fights and chase after anybody without reason, but you had absolutely no problem turning up on Korey Gaines all week, a man who shouldn’t even put a blip on your radar, but you entertained him. Disappointed, but not surprised at all that you’re willing to put more effort forth into a confrontation with someone who is supposedly so far beneath you than you are speaking up when I’m around.
Serena Bennett: Fuck are y’all so obsessed with me for, damn. You really ain’t got shit else to do apart from bother me, huh? I explained it plainly just now, you dumb fuck, I’m not the woman you think I am, Imp. I’ve since evolved from the woman I used to be, I’m a much better, fiercer, more focused version of myself than I ever was. You ain’t doin’ shit apart from gettin’ in my way, tryna block that shine, tryna distract me from gettin’ exactly to where I wanna be. And it’s not gon’ work. Comin’ at me for my time away from the ring like you can’t even be consistent for three straight months no more, get out my face, man.
Impact: Oh, that’s real clever. Cheers. Except whenever I’ve left, it hasn’t been an act of abandonment or weakness like yours was, but an absence dictated strictly on my terms. I’m nothing like you. You wanna swear up and down that Dynasty needs you, but this entire business needs me. Try and tell me otherwise, that ratings don’t plummet, that the competition each week is severely lacking when I’m not around. I’m still waiting to hear you admit that you’re actually too afraid to get too deep into it with me because you know you won’t be able to handle another exposé at my hands. I’m in your head, Serena. You ain’t really “with the shits” as much as you wanna be. Face it, you’re struggling to stay afloat right now.
Serena Bennett: Fuck outta here, cac, don’t try and tell me and I ain’t influence this game at a rate unlike anybody else y’all ever seen before.
Impact: Your only influence so far has been negative, disgraceful, and in all honesty, lucky. With you, it’s been fluke after fluke until your luck ran out and you immediately plummeted into limbo once you failed to get your hands back on the title you should have never found yourself in a position to win in the first place. You got nothing left, your fifteen minutes ran up a long time ago, you should be thanking me for the opportunity you have bestowed upon you to actually take a shot at someone always in a relentless pursuit of a competitive edge, a man who’s level of success would never be outweighed by anyone who should ever come after him because of that drive. You wish you could be as relevant as me, Serena–hell, you ever said it yourself if I remember correctly. That you wanted to be on my “level” one day, that you hoped to achieve the accolades and success and Hall-of-Fame career that I’ve rightfully earned for myself, that you looked up to me, respected all I’ve done for this industry. But all that ass-kissing is not gonna protect you from getting exposed time and time again. Whenever you’re done talking and sitting on your hands, come and find me, bitch, I’ll show you exactly what it is.
(Michael Belfort is heard huffing in shock, prompting Serena to turn her attention to him. She glares for a moment at Michael who opts to remove himself from the scene, and then back at Impact.)
Impact: I think you got a match up next, princess.
(Serena, still fuming, gives Impact one good look up and down before turning away from him, again, opting to walk away from the situation given the match she has coming up next. Impact watches her leave and is seen smiling smugly as Dynasty fades to commercial break.)
(Advertisement for Hawaiian Rolls starring Serena Bennett)
(Camera pans to an empty Dynasty arena where Stew, Jake, and Flannery are at the announcer’s table awaiting the next match as the camera begins to pan to the ring where Stephie Love is standing in the ring awaiting the next match)
(‘Thunderstruck’ By ACDC plays throughout the arena as Korey Gaines begins to come down to the ring prepared for his match and focused as he makes his way down the ramp and inside the ring)
Stephie Love: The following contest… IS SET FOR ONE FALL!!! First… From Oklahoma City, Oklahoma! Weighing in tonight at 170 Pounds!!!…. “The AERIAL WONDER” KOOORREEEEEYYYY GAAAAINNNEEEES…!!
Stew-O: Korey Gaines coming off an impressive fatal four-way victory on Dynasty focuses his attention on Serena Bennett tonight!
Flannery: Serena poses a different challenge than the other three talents he went against but he is looking to continue his momentum here tonight!
(‘Surfin” (ft. Pharrell Williams)” by Kid Cudi begins to play throughout the speakers of the arena. As Serena Bennett steps through the curtain and poses on the stage before she makes her walk down the ramp and steps inside of the ring)
Stephie Love: Introducing his opponent, From Compton, California!! Weighing in at 114lbs!!! SERENNAAAAAA BENNNNNNNNNETTTTTTTTT!!!!
(DING! DING! DING!)
Stew-O: We start with a quick collar and elbow tie-up between both competitors, it’s obvious Gaines has the weight and height advantage over Serena but that could prove to be irrelevant with the former Universal Women’s World Champion! Gaines quickly snags an armbar on Serena working over her arm as he applies mild pressure to the joint of her shoulder! Serena though counters the armbar as he maneuvers out of it with slight hand trickery as he manages to snag on a side headlock on Gaines! Gaines being backing Serena into the ropes, and he pushes her off! Serena sent into the ropes! She comes forward off the momentum of being sent off running right to Gaines! Gaines with a leapfrog jumping over Serena! Showing his athleticism as Serena comes forward again and Gaines drops for a hurdle as Serena hurdles over him into the ropes and she comes forward again! Gaines with a DEEP arm drag knocking Serena down to the canvas! And he once again applies that armbar working over the arm of Serena! Gaines showing his standard wrestling style right here! Gaines still working over that arm of Serena but Serena begins rising up to her feet as Gaines tries to tighten the pressure of the hold being applied to her arm!
Flannery: Serena though fights through it as she manages to rise on up to her feet! Gaines still with the arm utilized, but Serena using her other free arm to send body shots to Gaines! Repeated Body shots! As Gaines starts to loosen his grip over the arm of Serena! Serena ripping her arm fully away from Gaines as she sends a CHOP to the chest of Gaines! And then she follows it up with a forearm to the face of Gaines! Serena grabbing Gaines and snapmares him down to the canvas in a sitting up position! Serena runs off the ropes and runs straight to Gaines! BUT GAINES JUMPS UP TO HIS FEET AND JUMPS FOR A HURRICANRANA SENDING SERENA BENNETT OVERHEAD! Gaines is an amazing athlete and he continues to show off his athleticism as Serena rising up to her feet as Gaines quickly grabs her by her arm for an Irish-whip, Serena though with enough where with all to counter for a reverse whip as she sends Gaines to the ropes! Gaines comes back with a clothesline but Serena manages to duck the incoming clothesline! AND CATCHES GAINES WITH A JUMPING NECKBREAKER BRINGING HIM DOWN TO THE CANVAS! Gaines sitting up after that as Serena begins running off the ropes as he comes forward with a SHORT DROPKICK TO THE FACE OF GAINES!! Gaines holding his face as Serena rises up to her feet pleased at her work! Gaines through stirring up to his feet!
Jake Mercer: Serena grabbing Gaines up as she delivers a CHOP TO HIS CHEST! Gaines returns the favor with a knee to the mid-section! Serena eating that shot but comes forward with a forearm to the face of Gaines! Gaines comes back with a European uppercut jacking the jaw of Serena! Gaines switching his position as he sidesteps Serena who was going in for a strike! He grabs her by the waist! AND GOES FOR THE RELEASE GERMAN SUPLEX! But Serena LANDS ON HER FEET! Gaines turns! RUNNING, BUT SERENA PULLS DOWN THE ROPES AS GAINES FALLS TO THE OUTSIDE! Serena smiling at her work as she was able to evade danger from that release German Suplex! As Gaines staggers up to his feet, SERENA WASTING NO TIME AS SHE RUNS OFF THE ROPES AND DIVES THROUGH THE ROPES FOR A SUICIDE DIVE!!! Serena Bennett delivering here on Dynasty! She isn’t done as she quickly heads back inside the ring, Serena runs once again! ANOTHER SUICIDE DIVE AS SHE CONTINUES PUSHING GAINES BACK INTO THE BARRICADE! Gaines dropped as Serena isn’t done she’s going to do it again! Running inside the ring! AND SERENA RUNS FOR A SUICIDE DIVE! GAINES CATCHES HER THIS TIME!! He’s holding onto Serena AND POPS HER UP IN A POWERBOMB POSITION!! Gaines switches his attention to the ring post! HE THROWS SERENA NECK AND BACK FIRST INTO THE POST!! Serena dropping down immediately as Gaines looks on before grabbing Serena up and sending her inside the ring! Gaines quickly hooking the leg of Serena!
Stew-O: She pops her shoulder off the canvas! Gaines wasting no time though as he grabs Serena up before sending her into the corner! Gaines begins lifting Serena up onto the top turnbuckle! Gaines climbing as well as he could be looking for some high impact offense! Gaines going to the very top as both he and Serena are standing on the top turnbuckle! GAINES HOOKING SERENA! COULD BE GOING FOR A AVALANCHE SPANISH FLY FROM THE TOP TURNBUCKLE!! Serena though using her elbow to avoid this! Elbows to the face of Gaines repeatedly!! Gaines releasing Serena! Serena drops off the top turnbuckle onto the apron! As Gaines sits on the top turnbuckle rocked from those elbow strikes! Serena! SPRINGBOARDS OFF THE ROPES TO THE SITTING GAINES!! SPRINGBOARD HURRICANRANA BY SERENA!!! SENDING GAINES OVERHEAD AS HE CRASHES TO THE MAT!! Gaines holding his back from that beautiful move by Serena! Serena patiently waiting as Gaines begins rising up gingerly, he turns, SERENA RUNS!!! CLOTHESLINE FLOORING GAINES!! Gaines popping up to his feet once again! And SERENA COMES FORWARD WITH ANOTHER CLOTHESLINE KNOCKING DOWN GAINES! Gaines up but Serena meets him immediately with a spinning back kick to the mid-section! Gaines hunched over as Serena, WITH A KNEE STRIKE TO THE HUNCHED OVER GAINES! Serena unloading as she grabs Gaines and tries wrestling him down!
Flannery McCoy: SERENA GOING FOR A CROSSFACE!!! SHE’S TRYING TO TRAP THE ARM OF GAINES!! SHE GETS HIM DOWN!! GAINES TRYING TO AVOID HER APPLYING THE CROSSFACE!! Using his other free arm to block his face! But Serena begins ELBOWING GAINES IN THE HEAD!! REPEATEDLY ELBOW STRIKES!!! GAINES GIVES IN!! SERENA FULLY APPLIES THE CROSSFACE!! PULLING BACK AT THE NECK OF GAINES AND THE ONLY CHOICE IS PROBABLY TO TAP OR SNAP RIGHT HERE RIGHT NOW!!! Serena pulling aggressively! Gaines obviously in pain! This is not a comfortable position! Gaines! Gaines is fighting though! Gaines!! Grabbing at that leg of Serena! Hooking it! And rolls over to PIN SERENA’S SHOULDERS ON THE MAT!!
Jake: SERENA KICKS OUT!! SHE RELEASES THE HOLD!! BUT GAINES!! MANAGES TO SNAG ON AN ANKLE LOCK!!! ANKLE LOCK ON SERENA!!! HE’S TWISTING AT HER ANKLE!!! Serena SHOUTING IN PAIN AS THE REFEREE ASK HER IF SHE WANTS TO QUIT!! She obviously says no! Gaines though looking hell-bent and willing to snap her ankle! Serena pushing herself up! Crawling, inching, trying to get to the ropes! She inches closer, BUT GAINES PULLS HER BACK TO THE CENTER OF THE RING!! SERENA FRUSTRATED AND IN PAIN!!! SERENA PUSHES HERSELF UP ONCE AGAIN!! AND SHE SENDS GAINES OVERHEAD!! Gaines manages to stop himself before he collides with the turnbuckle as Serena hops up! Gaines running towards Serena, SWINGING FOR A ROUNDHOUSE KICK! Serena manages to duck the incoming kick! AS SHE TRIES TO DELIVER A ROLLING ELBOW! BUT GAINES!!! WITH A SUPERKICK BEFORE SHE CAN CONNECT!!! HE JUST KICKED SERENA BENNETT’S HEAD OFF WITH A SUPERKICK!! Gaines quickly leaving the inside of the ring as he looks on from the apron, ignores the top turnbuckle, instead looks down at the prone Serena Bennett! GAINES!! SPRINGBOARDS OFF THE TOP!!! SPRINGBOARD SHOOTING STAR PRESS CRASHING BODY TO BODY WITH SERENA BENNETT!!! GAINES HOOKING THE LEG!!
Stew: SHE KICKS OUT!!! SERENA MANAGING TO KEEP FIGHTING IN THIS CONTEST! Gaines! Shocked he absolutely thought he had Serena right there dead to rights! Gaines grabbing Serena up to her feet! And he muscles her up onto his shoulders! And begins walking over to the turnbuckle! Gaines climbing up the turnbuckle with Serena on his shoulders! This is not looking good for Serena! Gaines climbing up to the very top as he stands up on the second rope with Serena on his shoulders! AND SERENA!! COUNTERS!!!! TORNADO DDT FROM THE SECOND ROPE OFF THE SHOULDERS OF KOREY GAINS!!!! SERENA SHOWING SHE’S STILL IN THIS CONTEST AFTER THAT BEAUTIFUL MOVE!! Serena!! Still hurting from the offense of Gaines, but she rolls to the apron! And rises up to her feet slowly making it to the turnbuckle as she begins climbing high! Serena climbing!! She’s perched high as Gaines is prone on the canvas! AND SERENA! LEAPS FOR A FROG SPLASH!!!! AND SHE CONNECTS!!! Serena connecting with the frog splash and she begins crawling, and makes it! SHE HOOKS THE LEG OF KOREY GAINES!!
Flannery McCoy: KOREY GAINES POPS HIS SHOULDER OFF THE CANVAS!! IMMEDIATELY SERENA APPLIES THE TRAP QUEEN!!! SHE IMMEDIATELY GRABBED HIS ARM AND HAS THE TRAP QUEEN APPLIED!! PULLING!!! DOING EVERYTHING SHE CAN!!! TRYING TO GET GAINES TO SUBMIT!! GAINES EYES WIDEN!!! HE COULD BE FADING!!! HE’S TRYING HIS DAMNEST TO GET OUT OF IT BUT SERENA HAS THE HOLD IN DEEP!!! HE’S ALREADY BEEN IN THIS SUBMISSION HOLD WAY TO LONG!!! SERENA FULLY DETERMINED TO MAKE HIM SUBMIT!!! GAINES!!! GAINES REFUSING!!! THE REFEREE CHECKING!!! GAINES PASSES OUT!!!! GAINES RATHER PASS OUT THAN TAP OUT!!! AND THE REFEREE SIGNALS FOR THE BELL!!!
(‘Surfin’ picks up once again as Serena Bennett rises to her feet and raises hands in victory as the referee declares her the victor of this match as she begins celebrating the win)
Stephie Love: HERRREEEE IS YOUR WINNNERRRR….. SEREEEENNNAAAAAAAA…BENNETTTTTTTTTT….!!!!!
Stew-O: Wow! What a great match put on tonight by these two great talents here on Dynasty! You have to be impressed with Gaines who literally went full speed head on against the former Women’s World Champion!
Flannery: He can learn from losing, and I think this isn’t the last time we’ll see these two inside the ring against one another!
Jake: That head of Serena is just continuing to grow and grow, and it’s only a matter of time before someone steps on it, on neighborhood.
(Camera shows Serena celebrating here victory before she begins to leave the ring holding her back and smiling as camera pans elsewhere)
(A recap of last weeks altercation between Darcy May Morgan and Dr. Bethany Blue airs. It then shows what happened later in the night with Bethany having Darcy forcefully escorted out of the arena.)
(The camera fades back to a panoramic of the empty Pensacola Bay Center as Dynasty continues on. ‘Bad Medicine’ by Bon Jovi plays up as Dr. Bethany Blue makes her way out to the stage. She’s decked out in casual wear as it’s clear she’s not here to compete tonight. She twirls a mic for a moment as she clicks her tongue before making her way to the ring. She circles around the ring for a moment before rolling into the ring and standing square in the center of the ring as she holds the mic up to her mouth and begins to speak)
Dr. Bethany Blue: Sadly I could not be joined here tonight by someone I’d rather love to be in the ring with me tonight. The one that holds the Specialist Championship, Darcy May Morgan. Now you might be wondering, why isn’t she here? Why isn’t Darcy here to put my money where my mouth is and instead have me here talking about her woes?
(Bethany pauses for a moment letting that question linger in the air before beginning to speak again)
Dr. Bethany Blue: Well it’s pretty simple you see. Our Specialist Champion is currently stuck in Peru, where Dynasty was last week. You see with the recent events that have occurred and the actions that she took upon me where she REFUSED to be checked up from me and even allowed in the arena in the first place, yet proceeded to break the codes and restrictions that were held upon her and do it anyway! Therefore, me and the medical team did the right thing, you see, Darcy May Morgan is currently under quarantine. And I know my mind won’t be changed and she won’t magically pop up here because it’s clear to say she’s being closely monitored to make sure she doesn’t try to defy such order and make her way to the arena tonight.
(Bethany can’t help but elicit a smirk as she speaks and lightly taps the mic against her cheek as she continues)
Dr. Bethany Blue: Now I know you may like your defiant champions and how they defy the order and what not but clearly that has not stood the test of time for your beloved champion as she has dug a grave right for herself. Is this the champion you want? So much so that she happens to drop the ball and get herself stuck in a situation that she can’t get herself out of? A champion, that can’t even show up to her own show because of her own actions? That’s a bunch of bull sugar if you ask me. Sure she may be the valiant, brave champion you want and adore at the end of the day, but she’s not the champion you deserve-
(The Doctor’s eyes catch the titantron as she turns slowly to see that the screen has been changed from the regular Dynasty background to a regular looking medical room. Darcy May Morgan is seen as if the crowd as here there would be a major pop as they see their Specialist Champion live via satellite. But something is clearly off. She’s laying on a medical bed with a ventilator hooked up to her. She is holding the Specialist Championship, but it seems to be a prop. “Darcy” is staring right at the screen as Bethany’s wide-eyed face suddenly turns to a smug look. She turns to the camera shaking her head slowly as she begins to speak once more)
Dr. Bethany Blue: As I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted by our champion here. This is what happens when you face the consequences of your actions. This is what happens when you don’t let me do the job that I’ve been specialized to do. THIS is what happens when even if you don’t take your health seriously especially during a pandemic just like this one. But now that I’ve got that out of the way the question is still up in the air right? What’s going to happen to Ms. Morgan? Well, it’s safe to say despite everything that has happened, despite the state she is in and everything in between, rest assured for the people at home who are shocked by these actions there will still be a Specialist Championship match proceeding and going on at Grand Rampage. And I will be in it, and we’ll have it WITH or WITHOUT the COVID riddled Darcy May Morgan. But the results either way still do not change from the way it was before, because I will still be walking out of San Francisco, as your new Specialist Champion.
(‘Bad Medicine’ then proceeds to play up again as Dr. Bethany Blue drops the mic in the middle of the ring and proceeds to go through the ring ropes making her leave. She stands on the apron for a moment as she straightens out the jacket she was wearing as she makes her way down the ring steps and to the backstage area as Dynasty fades out to somewhere else)
(The scene opens up backstage as we see the outside of the arena. We see Drake King pacing back and forth outside as he can be seen trying to calm himself down.)
Drake King: I can’t believe he let us get into this situation…
(Drake is running his fingers through his hair. He’s taking deep breaths. He’s all alone, with a brick wall behind him until an arena door not too far from where he is pacing opens up and out comes an excited fella…)
???: DRAKE! DARLING! I’ve been looking all over for you, babe!
(Drake turns to see King Viz walking with his arms wide.)
The Visual Prophet: What you doing way the fuck out here? I convinced StarrStan to get us the biggest locker-room in the building! C’mon Drake, it’s chilly out here. Fuck around and get Pnemounia or touch something that pussy Chris Elite coughed on. IF anybody likely has corona, it’s that dirty fingernail having son of a
Drake King: AAAH!!!
(Drake punches a nearby dumpster as hard as he can and leaves a dent. Viz can’t help but flinch as he looks at Drake, fist swelling and hand turning violently red as Drake keeps pacing back and forth.)
The Visual Prophet: Drake, buddy…what’s the matter? Did Chris cough on you for real? Did somebody touch you? I’ll kill them where they stand for fucking with my partner!
Drake King: It’s YOU!
(Drake turns and gets in Viz’s face.)
The Visual Prophet: Bro, what’s going on?
Drake King: Don’t call me bro. Don’t call me bestie. Stop saying we are best friends. WE ARE NOT ANY OF THOSE THINGS! You and I are partners. We are the tag team champions.
The Visual Prophet: …Unified tag champs of the world to be exact…
Drake King: What…EVER! Listen. You and that mouth of yours keeps putting me in positions that have been uncomfortable for me. First that Real Talk interview…
The Visual Prophet: C’mon, everybody loved that. We got love from all over the world for that.
Drake King: Then that weird podcast we were on.
The Visual Prophet: I was just face timing Joe Budden, he loved your enthusiasm and said our match made him love wrestling again!
Drake King: Everything you and I do is just…it’s just…
The Visual Prophet: It’s loved by everybody that watches the program. We are the most beloved pairing in EAW history. The Jaded Hearts could never. Liquid Swordz are eating their hearts out. Heavenly Hell is gone because of how good we are and the fans love it!
Drake King: What about what I love? What about that?
The Visual Prophet: What do you mean?
Drake King: You know how I feel about Sierra. You know that, she knows that, everybody knows that. But what I love is secondary to what you and the fans love, huh? You are loving this carnage you created, right? SASS and us going at it, right? What about me and Sierra? What becomes of us after all of this crap?
The Visual Prophet: Drake, I know I can be a troll. I know, I can’t turn it off sometimes. People can’t tell when I’m being real or being a character or whatever the fuck they think of me. A lot of people cheer it on and I accept it but I’m telling you I GOT YOUR BACK! I know this is an uncomfortable situation with your girl being on the other team but I AM YOUR PARTNER! I am the reason why you finally got the tag gold and why you are a double champion. I asked you to join me and look at US! Stop worrying about Sierra, she’s emotional…
Drake King: Watch your mouth, man.
The Visual Prophet: You know I can say MUCH worse and I will before Grand Rampage. I’m not holding shit back because you know what I love, right?
Drake King: What’s that, stirring crap up? Causing mischief? Running my life?
The Visual Prophet: I love being partners with you, man. I could have cashed in this crown on you but I didn’t. I won’t because we are partners. Title or not, you got my back and I got yours. I trust you will give it your all at Grand Rampage and you can trust I won’t hold shit back.
Drake King: IF Sierra gets hurt…
The Visual Prophet: I’m not going to try to kill your girlfriend.
Drake King: Good.
The Visual Prophet: But I will kill and be killed as long as it means we remain champions.
Drake King: Look, you may think I’m being dramatic. But, I have more to lose than just these belts. I have more to lose than just a match.
The Visual Prophet: This is the thing, bro. If you think Sierra would WANT you to take it easy on her…then maybe your lack of experience with women is the biggest weakness we have going for us.
Drake King: You keep pushing me…
The Visual Prophet: THAT WAS A JOKE!
Drake King: …No it wasn’t.
The Visual Prophet: Yeah, it wasn’t. Stings, init?
Drake King: What’s with these british slang things you keep throwing out there every once in a while?
The Visual Prophet: Bloody ‘Ell Drake, I’m KANG VIZ! Britain is known for their monarchy. That and their god awful teeth.
Drake King: They do have some rough teeth.
The Visual Prophet: You feel me? Almost as bad as that one chick we saw in Peru. Remember? Francesca!
Drake King: It looked like she chewed on bricks and gargled with glass!
The Visual Prophet: It sure did!
Drake King: And yet you still slept with her.
The Visual Prophet: I sure did! Bitch was built like Sarah Price but she sucked dick like Serena Bennett!
Drake King: How would you know what Serena Bennett…nevermind. I don’t want to know and I don’t care.
The Visual Prophet: Hey…we good?
Drake King: Maybe. I got a title to defend tonight and I don’t want to drag my tag team title issues into my World Heavyweight title issues. Not that Ronan Malosi is even really an issue. You know what I mean, right?
The Visual Prophet: I got you, Drake. I got you loud and clear. Let’s head back in and get you ready for your title match! Want me to get you some warm water and a snacky snack?
Drake King: …Ok.
The Visual Prophet: Ok, we gon’ get you some warm water and a snacky snack!
(Viz walks to the door, opens it, and allows Drake to walk in first. The camera remains outside, zooming in on the dented dumpster as the scene fades out.)
Stew-O: You got a sense of what Drake was going through right there as Viz tried to reassure his partner that everything will be ok.
Flannery McCoy: Not going to lie, emotional Drake is kind of hot.
Jake Mercer: I agree.
Flannery McCoy: …
Jake Mercer: What? OH! It’s only ok when you objectify the talent. Excuse me, Mrs. Gavin Kirkland!
Flannery McCoy: Anyway, it’s obvious being in a match with Sierra Bradford as an opponent is in Drake’s head. He better clear all that out because Ronan Malosi will be in the ring with him in the main event and with that World championship on the line, that could be an advantage for Mr. Hot Takes himself.
Jake Mercer: HOT TAKE; Ronan is watching this and starting to gain some confidence in his chances to pull off the upset of the decade!
Stephie Love: The following contest is scheduled for ONE FALL!
(‘Go Off by Lil Uzi Vert, Quavo, and Travis Scott’ begins to play and Justin Windgate storms out to the entrance ramp as the audience cheers. Windgate has a joint in his mouth. He looks around the empty arena and shrugs his shoulders, handing the joint to the referee instead of someone in the front row. The referee looks confused.)
Stephie Love: His opponent, weighing in at 225 pounds, from Detroit, Michigan — THE NEW BREED CHAMPION! — JUSTINNNNN WINDDDDGATTTTEEEEE!!
Flannery McCoy: Last week we saw Justin Windgate successful in tag team action, albeit a dysfunctional tag team match. This week it’s back to singles action and his opponent is nobody to scoff at.
Stew-O: He’s got his work cut out for him but if one thing Justin Windgate has personified, it’s someone who overcomes the odds and shocks the world. He’s one of the most popular elitists on the rise today. The fans love him.
(The camera pans to Jalyn Garcia sitting at ringside, shaking his head at Justin Windgate.)
Jake Mercer: Of course Jalyn Garcia is out here scouting this troglodyte! She’s definitely more talented and someday soon will be INFINITELY more popular!
(Queen’s “Another One Bite’s The Dust” begins to play and the empty arena is filled with Queen, but no one to sing along. Out walks The Visual Prophet, crown on his head, spinning elegantly to show off his outfit. He points at Justin Windgate.)
Visual Prophet: (off mic) Oh, I’ve got your number!
Stephie Love: FROM DETROIT, MICHIGAN… WEIGHING IN AT 240 POUNDS… HE IS ONE HALF OF THE UNIFIED TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS AND THE 2020 KING OF ELITE… THE VISUAL PROPHET!!!!
(Visual Prophet blows Jalyn Garcia a kiss before stepping through the ropes and smiling and winking at Justin Windgate. He spins once more, showing off his outfit to the empty arena.)
Stew-O: The Visual Prophet has been on a tear as of late, winning the King of Elite and the World Tag Team Championships. In the same sense, however, he’s also had a misstep in his loss to Lethal Consequences at Reckless Wiring.
Flannery McCoy: This is his first time in action since then, we’re going to see another side of Visual Prophet tonight, I think. He’s hungry to comeback from that loss with an impressive victory over the reigning New Breed Champion.
DING! DING! DING!
Stew-O: Here we go! Justin Windgate is circling the ring and Viz is staying in one spot, simply looking at Windgate. Justin looks for a collar-and-elbow tie up. The two lock up! And Viz tosses Windgate on his back and across the ring with ease. It looks like Viz has the upper hand strength wise here tonight. And now he’s gryating his hips. Windgate looks in puzzlement as his opponent makes sexual advances toward him.
Jake Mercer: I once heard from a confidential source that Visual Prophet once worked at a Chip-n-Dale’s in Las Vegas in his earlier year-
Flannery McCoy: Windgate hops back to his feet and charges Viz. Viz knocks him down with a quick shoulder block. Viz comes off the ropes now, steps over Windgate, and comes back once again. Windgate hopes over Viz. Viz comes back and NEARLY TEARS WINDGATE’S HEAD OFF WITH A LARIAT! WOW! Viz is quick to grab Windgate by the hair, lifting him to his feet. Viz takes a step back and he pulls Windgate to his chest! BELLY TO BELLY SUPLEX! And Viz takes advantage, bending down and hooking the leg.
Stew-O: Windgate kicks out and rolls out of the ring to gain some composure here. Jalyn Garcia stands up and gets in his face.
Jalyn Garcia: (off mic) You’re mine, Windgate!
Jake Mercer: Justin Windgate tries to brush off the single member in the crowd tonight, the number one contender for that New Breed Championship. OH LOOK! VIZ IS ON THE TOP ROPE! WHAT’S HE DOING?!?!
Stew-O: FLYING CROSS BODY OFF THE TOP! Visual Prophet takes Windgate down on the outside. Viz quickly gets to his feet, tossing Windgate back into the ring. Viz takes a moment to wink at Jalyn, who looks at him in disgust, before rolling back into the ring. Windgate is seated and VIZ STRIKES WITH A KNEE!
Flannery McCoy: Thus far, Viz has been in total control of this match. Windgate hasn’t gotten any offense in. Viz picks up Windgate now, taking his time with him. He’s being deliberate and methodical with his attacks on Windgate. Viz mocks Windgate, pretending to puff a joint, before driving an uppercut right into the jaw of the New Breed Champion. Windgate stumbles back into the corner, hanging on to the ropes so as to not fall right onto his bottom here. Viz charges Windgate!
Stew-O: A miscalculation! Windgate side steps and gets out of the way and Viz’s sternum crashes into the turnbuckle. Viz steps back, holding his chest in pain. A ROLLUP BY WINDGATE! HE COULD TAKE THIS RIGHT HERE!
Flannery McCoy: Viz kicks out of the rollup pin and rolls back to his feet. Windgate pops up to his vertical base about as fast as he can. Windgate with a right hand to the face of Viz. And he follows up with a left. And another right! Viz stumbles back to the ropes and comes back, looking for a lariat to put Windgate down, but he’s able to duck. Viz turns around and Windgate goes for a super-kick, but Viz steps out of the way before he connects! Windgate charges toward Viz-
Jake Mercer: But he’s stopped in his tracks! Viz lifts Windgate up in a military press and he has him high in the air. Viz begins to walk around the ring, holding Windgate up, displaying impressive power here. Oh, Windgate is wiggling!
Stew-O: Windgate wiggles out of the military press and lands right on his feet. He keeps the arm of Viz and connects with an arm drag! Viz is back on his feet now and connects with an arm drag to Windgate. But Windgate snaps back to his feet. Windgate looks for a drop-kick, but Viz dodges! Viz turns around and swings with a huge uppercut, but Justin Windgate catches his arm! A HIP TOSS ON VIZ! AND WINDGATE FOLLOWS IT UP! SPRINGBOARD!
Jake Mercer: Spring board moonsault connects onto Visual Prophet! But Justin isn’t going for the cover. He exits the ring to the apron and quickly climbs the top rope. He’s gesturing for Viz to get back to his feet. All the ghosts in the arena are on their feet!!
Flannery McCoy: Ghosts?!
Stew-O: WINDGATE FLIES!!! 360 FROG SPLASH CONNECTS ONTO VIZ!!! That hurt Windgate as well, who’s clutching his abdomen, but he quickly rolls over and gets on top of Viz for the cover!
Flannery McCoy: NO! Viz kicks out and rolls over to the ropes, trying to get some composure here, as I’m sure he was caught off guard by the quick-step offense of Windgate. Justin Windgate is now back to his feet as well and he has his eyes on Viz, who is sitting up in the corner. WINDGATE CHARGES AND CONNECTS WITH A SENTON! Justin is on a roll right now and he drags Viz out of the corner and points two fingers at him. He’s off the ropes once again, he springboards! ANOTHER MOONSAULT!!!
Stew-O: IT CONNECTS! Wait, no! Viz had his knees up. Viz scouted that move and was prepared for it. Windgate is really clutching his ribs now as he came crashing down hard, right on his abdomen, onto the knees of The Visual Prophet.
Jake Mercer: I heard Visual Prophet has had two knee replacements becau-
Flannery McCoy: Shut the fuck up.
Stew-O: Viz gets back to his feet now. He’s clearly been damaged too by that offensive series by Windgate. He wants to shake it off though. Viz picks Windgate up by the hair and throws him to the outside. But Windgate hangs on to the ropes. Viz doesn’t notice this! VIZ TURNS AROUND RIGHT INTO A PELE KICK FROM WINDGATE! WINDGATE NEEDS TO CAPITALIZE!
Flannery McCoy: Justin is looking to springboard, but his ribs won’t let him get up. Viz stumbles back towards Windgate and nails him hard with a left forearm. This nearly sends him crashing to the floor, but he hangs on to the top rope. Viz stumbles back toward Windgate again and hooks his arm. What’s he doing?!!
Jake Mercer: VISUAL PROPHET DEADLIFTS WINDGATE INTO A VERITCAL SUPLEX POSITION FROM THE APRON!
Stew-O: And Viz is hanging on to him! Justin Windgate is upside down and about to get turned inside out if he’s not careful. Viz looks toward the opposite side of the ring! HE TOSSES WINDGATE!!!!
Flannery McCoy: Viz tosses Windgate from the vertical suplex stomach-first onto the top rope and Windgate crashes hard onto the rope. And he’s still hanging there! Windgate teetering on the rope. Viz climbs to the second turnbuckle. Windgate is still teetering on that top rope. VIZ CONNECTS WITH A LEG DROP ONTO WINDGATE!!!! AND WINDGATE IS BACK ON THE MAT!
Jake Mercer: A huge move connecting here, Viz uses his power to set Windgate up on that rope and he drove his head right onto the mat with the leg drop. You know, this week Viz said Windgate doesn’t deserve the name ‘Xtreme Classic’ because he has no classic matches, but I think he’s looking to change that right here tonight in front of absolutely nobody!
Stew-O: Viz is back on his feet now and he brings Windgate up by his head. Viz slaps Windgate across the face and spreads his arms out. He’s showboating for the television crowd tonight, Flannery. Viz brings Windgate close and kisses his forehead! HE’S GONNA END THIS MATCH WITH THE KISS TO THE HEAD! VIZ CRANKS HIS ARM BACK!
Flannery McCoy: Windgate returns the slap to Viz! And he slaps him again! A spinning kick to the midsection of Viz! Windgate grabs the head of Viz, he runs up the ropes! RUN IT UP CONNECTS! VISUAL PROPHET IS DOWN!
Jake Mercer: A huge counter! Visual Prophet was about to end this match and out of nowhere, Windgate makes a comeback. He’s going to need to take advantage of it. But I think he’s too goddamn lazy to make anything of it!
Flannery McCoy: Windgate is visibly exhausted from the onslaught earlier. He crawls over to Viz and drapes a single arm over is chest.
Stew-O: NO! VIZ GETS THE SHOULDER UP JUST IN TIME! Viz is rolling to the apron now and looking to use the ropes to try and get back to his feet. He’s shaking off the cobwebs. Windgate is across the ring, also using the ropes to get back to his vertical base. Both men have showed an awful lot of tenacity throughout this match, a lot of back and forth offense, but neither have been able to get the upper hand for an extended period of time.
Flannery McCoy: Windgate walks toward Viz and Viz… IKE TURNER SPECIAL!!!!! OUT OF NOWHERE VIZ CONNECTS WITH THE SPINNING BACKFIST AND SENDS WINDGATE TO THE MAT! HE FALLS LIKE A TON OF BRICKS!!!!
Jake Mercer: I can hear Tina singing now!!! THE SONG OF DEFEAT, BABY!!
Flannery McCoy: Viz exits the ring to the apron and climbs to the top rope slowly. It looks like Windgate is completely out of it. Viz gets to the top rope and is standing straight up. Viz is blowing kisses to the non-existent crowd here in Pensacola. Viz looks over to Jalyn Garcia and moves his hips a bit, taunting everyone he can in attendance-
Stew-O: WINDGATE JUST KIPPED UP! WHAT THE HELL?!?! WINDGATE IS BACK TO HIS FEET AND HE RUNS UP THE TURNBUCKLE AND STARTS DELIVERING RIGHT HANDS TO THE FACE OF VIZ! AND A LEFT!
Flannery McCoy: Viz is stumbling back and it looks like he might fall head first onto the mat outside if he isn’t careful!
Stew-O: Windgate grabs a hold of the head of Visual Prophet… HEADBUTT! VISUAL PROPHET JUST DELIVERED A NASTY HEADBUTT TO THE FACE OF JUSTIN WINDGATE, WHO FALLS BACKWARDS RIGHT ON HIS BACK TO THE MAT FROM THE TOP ROPE! AND VIZ FLIES!!!!!!!!
Jake Mercer: BOW TO THE HEART CONNECTS!!! VISUAL PROPHET HOOKS THE LEG OF WINDGATE!!!
DING! DING! DING!
Stephie Love: Here is your winner… VISUALLLLLLLLLLL PROPHEEEEEEEEEETTTT!!!!
Flannery McCoy: My God, what a match this was! I thought Windgate might make a comeback after the Ike Turner special, but Viz connected with a nasty headbutt right between the eyes and then connected with the deadly bow to the heart. Viz is outside now, grabbing that Tag Team Title gold. He passes by Jalyn Garcia who simply ignores him. Jalyn Garcia hops the barricade, though. Oh, man. This might be bad news for Windgate!
Stew-O: Garcia walks over to the time keepers table and rips the New Breed Championship from the arms of Stephie Love, who was going to hand it to Windgate who is still down in the ring. Garcia rolls into the ring, he can’t take his eyes off of that New Breed Championship.
Jake Mercer: Come on! Finish him off, Jalyn! Aim for the ribs, make sure this man can never disgrace this company with another bong hit again!
(The camera zooms in on Jalyn Garcia who’s staring at the New Breed Championship. Garcia bends down to Windgate.)
Jalyn Garcia: (off mic) Pathetic. This is mine. Enjoy it while it lasts, bitch.
Stew-O: Garcia lays the New Breed Championship across the chest of Windgate and walks off in disgust, adding insult to injury here. Justin Windgate comes up short tonight against Visual Prophet and he’s going to need to do everything he can to hold on to that New Breed Championship and continue his impressive reign.
Flannery McCoy: Folks, don’t go away, we have a lot more action for you tonight!!!
(Sarah Price stars in a advertisement promoting her up and coming appearance on Nickelodeon’s PAW Patrol)
(Dynasty comes back on air as the camera pans to Cage walking around backstage with a noticeable scowl on his face as crew workers and backstage officials are parting ways as Cage pushes the camera out of his way and quickly heads into the Interview area where Michael Belfort was standing on his phone as Cage looks him up and down with a scowl and begins circling him as Michael begins to get very uncomfortable as Cage takes out measuring tape out of his pocket)
Michael(nervously): Uh… What are you going to do with that Cage? Always a pleasure to see you, how are you? How are things going in life? You look great. I like the hair, the leather jacket. It fits yo-
Cage: Shut up. How tall are you?
Michael: Uhh… Why?
Cage: ANSWER THE FUCKING QUESTION…
Michael(nervously): I’m about five foot eight okay?
(Cage paces around Michael once again and begins measuring him from his back as Michael stands there very uncomfortable)
(Cage paces around Michael again and measures him from his side)
Cage: Hmm… 33
(Cage proceeds to measure Michael from his hip but Michael looks at Cage)
Michael: Cage, I’m very uncomfortable with what is going on right now
(Cage shoots Michael a violent look before he continues)
(Cage puts the measuring tape back in his pocket before looking at Michael Belfort)
Cage: I suggest you get a microphone, isn’t this your job? I have something to say to the public and to one very special individual.
(Michael grabs his microphone from his pocket as Cage looks at him with a disgusted look)
Cage: First of all, stop putting microphones in your pocket that is weird. Second, I was measuring you because you and Chris Elite are about the same in height measurements and I needed to get it right because I’m going to have to pick the smallest casket possible to put the biggest ego ever inside of. But moving on, I requested this time to say I’m in the Grand Rampage, yay, woo, but I’m the number one entrant now? Because my good friend Chris Elite wanted to put me there to get me and prove some kind of point that he’s in control, he thought he was doing something damaging to me when he delivered that little spoiled brat rant of his. I will say, it felt damn good to drop that coward on his dick-shaped neck with the Murder, death, kill. But it’s going to feel even better to make him look like an idiot when I win the whole thing, I’m going to win the Grand Rampage. I hold the ring, I’ll be the first son of a bitch out there and I’ll be the last son of a bitch walking out and I promise you neither you, Chris Elite, god himself, a coronavirus, or anyone is going to stop that from coming true. Unfortunately, though, I’ve been told that I cannot put my hands on wittle Chris. And I’m not surprised, I’m sure the whole world has heard Chris Elite talk about how he’s looking forward to getting in the ring with me but insist on prolonging it, he could use the contract for anything, instead, he uses the contract to prevent me from touching him.
Cage: Do I look like a man who follows rules? I was causing havoc on this show for weeks looking for this pussy. But it’s alright with me, I’m going to win the Grand Rampage, I don’t give a shit if it’s 30 people, 40 people, 50 people, put the whole damn roster in it, NOTHING is stopping me, and once that business is taken care of, I’m going to take care of the little Chris Elite problem. I’m ahead of the game Michael, he thinks he has it all figured out. He doesn’t know that the position I am in is the position I’ve always wanted. Rex McAllister can talk about how he’s going to win the Grand Rampage, everyone can say what they are going to do inside of the Grand Rampage match but I promise you there’s nobody more designed for the match than me. And when I step inside the ring with TLA tonight, the only thing equivalent to a preview is when my hand is raised after I drop him on his head as well and pin his shoulders to the mat. Thank you for your time you weird midget suit-wearing smelly son of a bitch.
(Cage walks off as Michael looks on in shock)
(“Smells Like Teen Spirit” (Butch Vig Mix) by Nirvana hits, as Cage steps out onto the stage wearing a leather jacket. The atmosphere is definitely different than what Cage is used to, as there are no fans in attendance. Cage looks directly into the camera with a determined expression, then continues to walk down the ramp)
Stephie Love: The contest is a Grand Rampage Preview match that is set for!!!!
(Flannery McCoy is seen looking at both Stew-O and Jake Mercer. She then faces Stephie Love and stands up out of her seat)
Flannery McCoy: ONE FALL!!!!!
(Stephie Love looks down at Flannery McCoy with a smile, as Flannery McCoy smiles back)
Stephie Love: Introducing first, from Edmonton, Alberta, Canada!!!! Weighing in at 227lbs!!! EXPLICIT CONTENT!!!!!! CAGEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!
Jake Mercer: You really wanted to do that didn’t you?
Flannery McCoy: Of course! The “One Fall” is the best part!
Stew-O: What’s going to be better is this upcoming match up right here! We are getting closer and closer to Pain For Pride, and the Grand Rampage match could be the ticket that the both of these guys need in order to find themselves back in the World title picture! Last week we found out that Cage will have to do what is seemingly impossible and try to outlast 29 other elitists if he intends on being the 2020 Grand Rampage winner. He’s entered in at number one, and although the odds are stacked against him, I wouldn’t be surprised if he manages to do it!
Flannery McCoy: Me either! Cage is a special talent that has managed to keep himself at the top of EAW. He’s been here for nearly a decade, and the man still has a lot more left in him!
Jake Mercer: But he still has Chris Elite to worry about. Judging by his actions last week, I can’t see how someone like Cage could possibly pull out a victory at the Grand Rampage. We all saw how he walked out on Chris Elite in their loss against both the New Breed and Specialist Champions. I don’t care what kind of beef he has with Chris Elite, if he goes into The Grand Rampage with that energy, Cage isn’t leaving the arena with a match in the Pain For Pride main event in his future plans.
(Cage is seen walking around inside the ring. He still has a very determined look on his face, as he takes off his leather jacket and tosses it over the ropes as it lands down on the ground at ringside. The Nirvana track cuts, as “Ambitionz az a Ridah” by Tupac hits. TLA steps out onto the stage with a bright smile on his face. He’s wearing bright blue tights along with white boots and a white fedora hat. TLA looks directly at Cage with a smirk, as he makes his way down to the ring)
Stephie Love: And his opponent!!! From THE POON PALACE IN MIAMI, FLORIDA!!! Weighing in at 210lbs!!!! LA PANTERA SEXUAL!!!! T!!!!!!! L!!!!!! A!!!!!!!!!
Stew-O: As much as Cage wants to headline Pain for Pride and earn himself a shot at the world title, you can’t forget about the determination that this man right here has to get himself into that same exact position! TLA lost the EAW World Heavyweight Championship to Drake King back at the King of Elite, then lost in his rematch for the belt at Reckless Wiring a couple of weeks ago. With that said, TLA is now at the back of the line when it comes to World Heavyweight Title opportunities but by winning the Grand Rampage match, he would catapult himself right back into the World Title Picture!
Flannery McCoy: This is a battle between two of Dynasty’s best talents. They both have one goal in mind as we head into The Grand Rampage, and tonight we should get an excellent preview of what these two individuals are willing to put themselves through in order to secure the victory on the 19th.
Stew-O: And these two aren’t strangers to each other at all. The last time that they competed against each other was actually at last year’s Pain For Pride where TLA picked up the victory. These two know what the other brings to the table, and it will be interesting to see how their battle unfolds here tonight.
Jake Mercer: I’ve got my money on TLA. But that money could certainly go towards you Flannery if you show us all those pole dancing skills you’ve been hiding from us.
Flannery McCoy: (Raising her hand as she’s just about to slap the skin off of Jake Mercer’s face.) You remember what happened last week?
Jake Mercer: Never mind.
Flannery McCoy: I thought so..
(DING! DING! DING!)
Stew-O: And there’s the bell! Two of Dynasty’s finest talents are about to square off in that ring! Both TLA and Cage are standing in their corners. They slowly walk to the center of the ring and dap each other up as a sign of respect, before circling around in the middle of the ring!
Jake Mercer: Right hook by Cage! No! It’s dodged by TLA as he ducks underneath the arm! TLA gets behind Cage, as Cage turns around!! Quick kick to the right leg of Cage by TLA! No!! Cage leaps in the air to avoid contact with his lower leg! Cage lands back onto the mat, and connects with a strong knee strike to the stomach of TLA before connecting with a quick side headlock takedown!!
Flannery McCoy: Cage takes the early advantage here, as he’s squeezing the head and neck of TLA! He drives all of his weight into TLA resulting in more pressure on the move!
Stew-O: When facing someone with the high flying luchador style that TLA is known for, grounding him and slowing him down is the best strategy. Cage is doing that perfectly right here!
Flannery McCoy: Cage still has a tight headlock locked in, but TLA is fighting to get himself into a better position. TLA forces himself off of his back, as he turns onto his hands and knees with his head still locked between the arms of Cage! TLA continues to work himself up, as he is now up to his feet. Cage continues to squeeze TLA’s head, trying to cut off all air circulation, but TLA connects with a hard elbow shot that lands right into Cage’s ribs!! Cage’s grip loosens, as TLA connects with another elbow shot! TLA now pushes Cage off of him, as Cage runs to the far ropes!
Jake Mercer: But there’s Cage with a mean shoulder block that brings TLA down to the mat! TLA gets back up to his feet, but is met with a mean back handed slap to the chest by Cage! Cage connects with another! And another! And another! The sound of Cage’s hand smacking against TLA’s chest echoes throughout this empty arena, as Cage again connects with another backhanded slap! TLA clutches at his chest in pain, as Cage takes a step back then connects with a powerful discus lariat that sends TLA right back down to the mat!!
Stew-O: This is a whole different Cage that we are seeing here tonight as opposed to the one we saw last week. Last week it didn’t seem like Cage wanted any part in his tag team match, whereas right now he’s going right at the former World Champion!
Flannery McCoy: TLA rolls over onto his hands and knees, as he’s slowly trying to work his way back up to his feet! But Cage with a powerful kick to the stomach of TLA that forces the luchador to roll to the side of the ring! TLA grabs hold of the ring ropes, as he’s using them to help himself get back up to his feet!
Stew-O: But Cage isn’t wasting any time, as he walks right over to TLA and grabs him by the head and brings him to his feet before TLA could do it himself. Cage walks TLA over to the center of the ring, and connects with a strong knee strike to the abdomen and ribs! Cage turns TLA around, and wraps his arms around his waist! He lifts him up!!! GERMAN SUPLEX BY CAGE!!!
Jake Mercer: NO!!! TLA backflips in mid-air and lands on his feet, as Cage falls straight to his back! TLA quickly runs to the ropes behind him, he rebounds! Cage gets back up to his feet! AND IT’S TLA WITH A RUNNING CLOTHESLINE!!! No!!! Cage ducks underneath it, as he gets from behind TLA! CARTEL KICK BY TLA!!! THE PELE KICK CONNECTS AND IT STUNS CAGE! CAGE IS STILL STANDING ON HIS FEET GROGGY!! BUT TLA GETS BEHIND HIM AND SENDS HIM STRAIGHT DOWN TO THE MAT WITH THE ZIG ZAG!!! Cage is down in the center of the ring, as TLA hops back up to his feet! He stands beside Cage, and connects with a standing moonsault!! TLA hooks the leg!!
Referee: ONEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!! TW-
Stew-O: And there’s the kickout by Cage! TLA gets right back up to his feet and stomps down onto Cage’s stomach! Cage snaps up into a seated position due to the momentum of that stomp before falling right back down to the mat! TLA makes his way over to the side of the ring and exits through the ropes, as he now stands on the ring apron! Cage is still down in the center of the ring, as TLA grabs the top rope and launches himself up!!! SPRINGBOARD SPLASH!!!! NO!!! Cage rolls out of the way, as TLA lands on his feet right past him! TLA stumbles forward for a brief second, but catches his balance!!
Flannery McCoy: Look it’s Cage!! He’s gotten back up to his feet, behind TLA!!! OLD SCHOOL EXPULSION! THE INVERTED NECKBREAKER SLAM CONNECTS ONTO TLA!
Jake Mercer: Cage slowly gets back up to his feet, as he grabs a hold of TLA’s head and helps him up to his feet. Cage lifts TLA up onto his shoulders in a fireman’s carry position!!
Flannery McCoy: This isn’t looking too good for TLA right now!
Stew-O: Cage is walking around the ring with TLA on his shoulders! He stops and launches him in the air!! USHIGOROSHI!!! THE FIREMAN’S CARRY NECKBREAKER!!!! NO!!! TLA managed to push himself off just as Cage was going for the move, and TLA lands on his feet a few feet away! Cage tries to get back on the attack with a right jab, but TLA ducks it, and connects with a right jab of his own! TLA with a left! Now again with his right! Cage fires back with a right hook, but TLA blocks it, keeps the arm, and connects with a right handed Mexican uppercut that stuns Cage!! Cage takes a few steps back as it’s clear that he’s seeing stars after that nasty shot by TLA! TLA runs to the ropes and bounces back!! TILT A WHIRL HEADSCISSORS TAKEDOWN BY TLA!!! IT CONNECTS, AS CAGE GETS LAUNCHES OVER TO THE RING ROPES!! HIS HEAD AND ARMS ARE HANGING OVER THAT BOTTOM ROPE, AS HE FACES THE EMPTY ARENA!!!
Flannery McCoy: We know exactly where this is going!! TLA sees the position that Cage is in, and he charges right in that direction!!! THE 305!!!! TIGER FEINT KI-
Stew-O: CAGE JUST SHOVED TLA IN THE CHEST RIGHT AS HE WAS SPIRALING BACK THROUGH THE ROPES, AND TLA LANDS FLAT ON HIS BACK ON THE RINGSIDE FLOOR!!!! What a counter by Cage!!!
(We see TLA clutching at his lower back in pain down at ringside, as Cage has his left arm and head over the middle ropes watching his opponent struggle to get up on the outside of the ring)
Jake Mercer: Cage stands back up, as he charges for the far ropes! He rebounds!! TLA back up to his feet on the outside!! SUICIDE DIVE BY CAGE!!! BOTH MEN ARE DOWN ON THE OUTSIDE!!!
(Both Cage and TLA are seen lying flat on their backs at ringside.)
Referee: ONE.. TWO… THREE…
Flannery McCoy: There has been so much action going on so far that I can barely even tell that we don’t have any fans in the audience.
Jake Mercer: Really? Well TLA’s known for all of the action he’s apart of inside of his Poon Palace in Mexico. All of those mamacitas!! You know, I think the offer is still on the table if you’re trying to see what kind of action you’re capable of doing Flannery. Those poles won’t dance on themselves.
(Flannery McCoy slaps Jake Mercer right across the face)
Flannery McCoy: I told you it was coming if you didn’t shut it..
Referee: FOUR… FIVE…
Stew-O: And Cage gets up to his feet! TLA is using the ring apron to make his way up to his feet as well, but Cage quickly gets on the attack as he strikes TLA with a strong right handed punch to the top of TLA’s head!! Cage again connects with a strong punch before grabbing TLA! Cage irish whips TLA, as TLA crashes back first against the barricade that separates the ring from this nonexistent audience!!!
Flannery McCoy: AND THERE’S CAGE!! HE CHARGES AT TLA AGAINST THE BARRICADE!!! RUNNING BODY SPLASH!!!!
Jake Mercer: No!! TLA gets out of the way just in time, as Cage crashes chest first up against the barricade! Cage is clutching at his ribs and abdomen in pain, as he walks right into a Swag Shot pimp slap by TLA!!! Cage stumbles over towards the ring, and TLA is right there to connect with some powerful right and left handed punches!
Stew-O: TLA has Cage back up against the ring apron, as he continues to fire away with those quick striking combos!! Cage looks like he may be out of it, as TLA grabs Cage’s head, turns him around, and bashes it up against the ring apron before sliding him into the ring!!!
Flannery McCoy: TLA now climbs up onto the ring apron and makes his way over to the corner turnbuckle! TLA climbs up to the top rope! Cage is lying flat on his back in the ring! TLA leaps into the air!!! BURNOUT!!!! CORKSCREW 360 SENTON!!!!! IT CONNECTS!!!! TLA COVERS!!!
Referee: ONEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!! TWOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! THREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!
Stew-O: NO!!!!!! CAGE GOT HIS FOOT ON THE BOTTOM ROPE!!! THE MATCH CONTINUES!!!! TLA CAN’T BELIEVE IT!!!
Flannery McCoy: I guess when TLA slid Cage back into the ring, he didn’t slide Cage far enough to where Cage wouldn’t be able to reach any of the ring ropes.
Stew-O: It definitely backfired on him, as Cage’s ring awareness was put on full display moments ago!
Jake Mercer: TLA goes back on the attack, as he stays down on one knee to connect some brutal punches to the top of Cage’s head! TLA grabs a good hold of Cage’s head and neck, and slowly brings him up to his feet! And now the Luchador grabs a hold of Cage’s arm, and whips him to the corner, as Cage crashes hard against the turnbuckle!
Stew-O: TLA is charging at Cage in the corner!! RUNNING DROPKICK!!! IT CONNECTS RIGHT ONTO CAGE’S CHEST!! Cage slowly walks out of the corner due to the momentum and impact of that intense dropkick, but TLA pops up to his feet and connects with another Mexican uppercut that sends Cage right back into the corner!!
Flannery McCoy: TLA now walks over to Cage, as he connects with a backhanded slap to his chest, then a kick to his stomach!! TLA grabs Cage’s arm once more, as he whips Cage across the ring!! Cage crashes hard against the opposite turnbuckle!!! TLA is at the other end! He charges at Cage!! RUNNING BODY SPLASH IN THE CORNER!!! NO!!! Cage counters with a back elbow that catches TLA right across the jaw!!! TLA turns around and clutches at his jaw in pain!! BUT CAGE RUNS UP TO TLA!!! DIAMOND CUTTER!!!!! DIAMOND CUTTER CONNECTS ONTO TLA OUT OF NOWHERE!!! THAT’S VINTAGE CAGE RIGHT THERE!!!! CAGE HOOKS THE LEG!!!!
Referee: ONEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!! TWOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! THREEEEEEEEEEEEEEE-
Stew-O: AND TLA KICKS OUT!!!! CAGE CAN’T BELIEVE IT!!!!
Flannery McCoy: Neither one of these men want to lose to the other! For Cage, this is a Pain For Pride rematch where he can avenge his loss against TLA! For TLA, this is an opportunity to show everyone sitting at home that he really is a step above Cage!! Neither one of these two competitors are letting the other get away with the victory!!
Cage (Off-Mic): STAY DOWN!!!
(Cage connects with two right handed punches to the face of TLA)
Cage (Off-Mic): STAY DOWN!!!
Stew-O: It looks like Cage is getting pretty frustrated with the amount that TLA is willing to go through in order to stay in this match. Cage gets up to his feet and he curb stomps TLA right in the head! Another! And another! And another!! CAGE IS GOING NUTS AND IS CONTINUOUSLY STOMPING DOWN ONTO THE HEAD OF TLA!!! CAGE ISN’T LETTING UP! ANOTHER! AND ANOTHER!!! AND ANOTHER!!! 7 repeated Curb stomps!!!!
Flannery McCoy: I don’t know how much more TLA can take!!
Jake Mercer: And there’s Cage with an eighth curb stomp!!!
(Cage takes a few steps away from TLA, as he walks over to the other side of the ring. TLA is down on the mat. He looks lifeless, as Cage looks down at him)
Stew-O: TLA may be out of it right now. I don’t see how any person can take that many stomps to the head like that!
Flannery McCoy: Well there is no movement whatsoever coming from the Mexico’s finest former world champion. The referee is checking up on TLA to make sure that he’s-
Stew-O: AND CAGE CHARGES AT TLA AGAIN AND BEGINS TO STOMP DOWN ONTO HIS HEAD!!! MORE CURB STOMPS!!! CAGE HAS GONE MAD!!!! EIGHT! NINE! TEN CURB STOMPS TO THE HEAD OF TLA!!! Cage hooks the legs! This one’s over!!
Referee: ONEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!! TWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! THREEEEEEEE-
Jake Mercer: BUT TLA KICKS OUT!!!!
Flannery McCoy: NO WAY!!
(Cage is seen rolling off to the side onto his hands and knees. He begins pounding the mat hard repeatedly due to the amount of frustration that has built up)
Stew-O: These two put on an incredible match at Pain For Pride, and their doing the exact same thing right here. This isn’t some showcase for the fans. This isn’t a popularity contest. This is a match that involves two men with one goal in mind! To beat the other person and build some momentum heading into the big event on the 19th!!
(Cage looks over at TLA who’s lying flat on his back, breathing heavy, and showing very minimal movement. Cage walk over to TLA and gets on top of him before firing away with rights and lefts!)
Jake Mercer: This attack by Cage continues on, and I don’t know how much more TLA can take. This is absolutely horrible what Cage is doing! Horrible!
Flannery McCoy: Horrible?! He’s doing whatever he needs to do to win! TLA isn’t a pushover, and it’s obviously going to take extra effort in order to take him down! Isn’t this what you wanted to see from Cage? You were upset with how he didn’t go all in for his match last week, and now your upset that he’s actually doing that?
Jake Mercer: Screw Cage. Screw TLA. I’m not even a fan of either of them. I’m only a fan of what I’ve been seeing inside TLA’s Poon palace, but he’s got everyone quarantined inside, so I can’t even get the experience that I want!
Flannery McCoy: Like they’d let you experience anything at all..
Jake Mercer: Would You? :mjlit:
(Flannery McCoy slaps Jake Mercer across the face once more)
Stew-O: Well while Flannery is beating the hell out of Jake, I think we are seeing the damage being done in the ring! Cage is getting off of TLA after delivering all of those brutal MMA style punches to the face. Cage looks down at TLA, then over to the corner turnbuckle! He looks down at TLA again with a big smirk on his face! What does Cage have in mind here?
Flannery McCoy: I don’t know Stew, but whatever it is, it doesn’t seem like it will favor TLA in any way!
Jake Mercer: Cage grabs TLA by the head. He pulls him up to his feet, as TLA leans up against Cage’s body unable to stand by himself. Cage walks him and TLA over to the corner, as he climbs up to the top rope. He pulls TLA’s head in, as TLA is now on the second rope! Cage hooks the arms!! He’s going for Pepsi Plunge!!! THE WELCOME TO CANADA MOTHERFUCKER!!!!
Stew-O: NO!!! TLA MANAGES TO BREAK HIS ARMS FREE, AS HE GETS A SECOND WIND AND BEGINS THROWING PUNCHES RIGHT TO THE ABDOMEN OF CAGE!!! Cage loses his balance on the top rope, as his legs split the turnbuckle. Cage lands in a seated position on the top rope, as TLA hops off of the ropes, turns around!!! PELE KICK BY TLA THAT ROCKS CAGE RIGHT IN THE SIDE OF THE HEAD!! Cage still sits on the top rope groggy from that kick! TLA looks Cage right in the face!! SWAG SHOT!!! ANOTHER SLAP TO THE FACE BY TLA!!!! TLA is now climbing up the ropes! He hooks Cage’s head!! I think TLA is going to attempt a superplex right here, as he gets Cage to stand up on the top rope!!!
Flannery McCoy: NO!!! Cage pops his head free, as he delivers another vicious punch to TLA that causes him to fall off the ring ropes and land inside the ring on his feet!! BUT TLA CHARGES AT CAGE AND SHOVES HIM OFF OF THE TOP ROPE, AS CAGE CRASHES CHEST FIRST INTO THE BARRICADE SURROUNDING THE RING!!! Cage falls down to the ringside floor, as he clutches at his chest and upper abdomen in pain! He’s kicking his legs up and down here at ringside as he lays on the floor!!!
Referee: ONE… TWO… THREE… FOUR… FIVE… SIX…
Jake Mercer: Meanwhile, in the ring, TLA is sitting up against the turnbuckle that he shoved Cage off of. He’s looking down at Cage confused as ever on what he needs to do to defeat that man!! TLA reaches up and uses the ropes to help assist him to his feet. He stumbles a little bit, as he still needs to use the ropes to keep his balance! Cage is slowly getting up to his feet, using that barricade to help himself up. Cage finally stands up! He turns to face the ring..
Stew-O: SUICIDE DIVE BY TLA!!!! TLA BUILT THE STRENGTH TO RUN TO THE ROPES, REBOUND, AND LEAP OVER THE OPPOSITE ROPES JUST TO LAND ON TOP OF CAGE!!! BOTH OF THESE MEN ARE DOWN!!!!!
Referee: ONE… TWO… THREE… FOUR… FIVE….
Flannery McCoy: TLA is the first one of the two to get up to his hands and knees. He crawls his way over to the ring apron, and struggles his way into sliding back in the ring. TLA lays flat on his back. He looks exhausted!
Referee: SIX… SEVEN…
Flannery McCoy: You don’t think TLA is going to try to win this by count out do you?
Jake Mercer: Who knows? After everything these guys have been putting themselves through, if TLA doesn’t win this right here, he may not even make it to the Grand Rampage!
Stew-O: Cage slowly gets up to his hands and knees. He’s crawling towards the ring.
Jake Mercer: Cage grabs a hold of the ring apron. He uses it to help himself up!
Flannery McCoy: AND CAGE SLIDES BACK INTO THE RING!!! THE MATCH CONTINUES!!!!!
(Cage is seen laying on his stomach, as TLA is laying on his back. Both men are breathing heavily, as they make eye contact with one another)
Stew-O: This is an all out war between two of the best that Dynasty has to offer! It’s a matter who wants it the most!!
(Cage and TLA both use the ring ropes to help bring themselves up to their feet. They both stumble towards one another, and bring their fists up signaling that they’re ready to keep fighting)
Jake Mercer: Who’s going to strike first here!?!
Flannery McCoy: WAIT LOOK!!! IT’S GWYN GILFRIED, MIKE GAMBINO, HEVEL, DRAY FONTANA, and EL LANDERSON!! THEY ALL CHARGE DOWN TO THE RING!!!
(All five Elitists slide into the ring)
Stew-O: And now Gwyn Gilfried and Hevel on Cage as they start throwing punches at the hall of famer! At the other side of the ring Landerson, Dray Fontana, and Mike Gambino are working on TLA!! Kicks and punches are being thrown all over the place, and the referee calls for the bell!!
(DING! DING! DING!)
Flannery McCoy: Gwyn Gilfried and Hevel have Cage corner against the turnbuckle. Still throwing rights and lefts! Cage manage to shove both men off, as they stumble back a few feet! Hevel charges at Cage!! But Cage kicks him in the gut! STUNNER!!!!! HEVEL POPS UP GROGGY, AND CAGE GRABS HIM BY THE HEAD AND TOSSES HIM OVER THE TOP ROPE AND DOWN TO THE RINGSIDE FLOOR!!
Jake Mercer: At the other end of the ring, Dray Fontana and Mike Gambino have both of TLA’s arms! They whip him towards the ring ropes!! TLA doesn’t bounce back however, as he hangs onto the top rope! He’s leaning against those side ropes, as Gambino and Dray Fontana charge right at him with double lariats!!
Stew-O: BUT TLA PULLS DOWN ON THAT TOP ROPE, AS GAMBINO AND DRAY GO FLYING OVER THE TOP ROPE AND DOWN TO THE RINGSIDE FLOOR!!!
Flannery McCoy: And now Gwyn Gilfried is on the attack, as he locks in a tight side headlock on Cage!!
Jake Mercer: LOOK! IT’S LANDERSON ON THE TOP ROPE!! But TLA is up to his feet!! TLA makes his way to Landerson and jumps in the air!!! CARTEL KICK!!! THE PELE KICK CONNECTS ONTO LANDERSON, AND LANDERSON FALLS FROM THE TOP ROPE DOWN TO THE RINGSIDE FLOOR!!!
Stew-O: Cage is still locked in that side headlock, but he manages to elbow Gwyn Gilfried in the stomach to force some separation between the two! Gilfried’s grip is loosened!! AND CAGE CONNECTS WITH ANOTHER STUNNER!!!! GILFRIED POPS UP, AND CAGE TOSSES HIM OVER THE TOP ROPE AND DOWN TO THE RINGSIDE FLOOR!!!!
(Cage and TLA are seen as the only two people left in the ring, as all of the other Elitists are down at ringside)
Stew-O: THESE TWO MEN! THESE TWO MEN ARE DETERMINED TO WIN THE GRAND RAMPAGE!! THEY FOUGHT THROUGH HELL AND BACK WITH ONE ANOTHER! THEY GOT JUMPED BY FIVE ELITISTS WHO MAY ALSO BE COMPETING IN THE GRAND RAMPAGE, AND THEY JUST CLEANED HOUSE!!! THERE IS NOTHING THAT CAN STOP THESE TWO!!!
Flannery McCoy: I don’t even think they can stop each other. After everything these two men have put themselves through, they still stand unbeaten here tonight. If there is anyone that intends on winning the Grand Rampage, this may not be your year if your name isn’t Cage or TLA, because these two men are on a mission!!!!
(Cage and TLA are seen breathing heavily. They stare at one another, as they fully understand that it’s going to take a lot to eliminate the other if they were to see each other in that Grand Rampage match. The screen eventually fades to black)
(Dynasty fades backstage where a victorious Andre Walker is standing by with Michael Belfort. Belfort grins into the camera before he begins speaking.)
Michael Belfort: Earlier this evening, Dynasty newcomer, Andre Walker, picked up a big win over Kasey Kaos in his first match here in EAW. Andre, your arrival has been incredibly hyped, with your first promotional video going viral. The EAW Universe seems extremely excited to have you on Friday nights and you definitely delivered in your first match. How does it feel to get that first win under your belt?
Andre Walker: Fantastic. I knew coming into the match I had the mental and physical advantage over Kasey, not to mention I’m just more talented than she could ever hope to be. I’m not at all surprised that I took care of business in routine fashion, and I look forward to moving on to bigger things here in EAW.
Michael Belfort: When you speak of bigger things, what does that truly mean to you? I assume you have short term and long term goals.
Andre Walker: Of course. I’m an ambitious guy and if I’m going to win one title, I’m going to win them all. I’m always going to give my best effort, and do the work, and I know that’s going to pay dividends for me not just right now, but for the foreseeable future.
(Dainty, lady-like coughing is heard off camera which of course gets the attention of Walker and Belfort.)
Michael Belfort: Are you okay, Kensingten?
(Kensingten Calhoun-Astor strolls into the picture wearing a beautiful pin-up girl style dress, delicate heels, little lace gloves, and of course a lace covered N95 mask to protect her from COVID-19.)
Andre Walker: Should you be walking around backstage if you have a cough? :lupe:
(Kensingten looks down her nose at Walker, clearly stunned someone like him would speak to her. She promptly scoffs and turns her attention to Belfort.)
Kensingten Calhoun-Astor: First of all, Mr. Belfort, that is not the proper way to address a real lady. You will refer to me as Miss Calhoun-Astor, do I make myself clear?
Michael Belfort: Of course, Miss Calhoun-Astor.
(Kensingten smiles sweetly and shoos Walker out of the way so she can be front and center.)
Kensingten Calhoun-Astor: Now, I just could not help but overhear this little conversation and Mr. Belfort, I am honestly stunned. I faced this gentleman last week, so I really can’t fathom why the two of you are speaking as if he just showed up and had his first match. I can only assume that the actual shock over him going an entire week without getting arrested for something is what’s led to this confusion, or… OR! The fact that this man is clearly on the LAM. :lupe:
Michael Belfort & Andre Walker: :skip:
Kensingten Calhoun-Astor: I mean how else can we possibly explain Mr. Henderson’s sudden change in hair color and the fact he suddenly sounds educated this week? He’s clearly ‘frontin’’ as those people would say, but you can’t fool me! I see right through this little ruse! Last week, this man, Mr. Henderson, sexually assaulted me when he placed his hands on my bosom… and… *Kensingten is clearly overcome with emotion* … well you know the rest!
Andre Walker: Lady… my name is An-
Kensingten Calhoun-Astor (looking towards Belfort): Did he just try and speak to me?
(Walker glares at Kensingten, unable to help himself. He feels his patience slipping at the moment.)
Kensingten Calhoun-Astor: You know, it’s just like these people to try and hide from what they’ve done. They have never truly known their places in this world, dating all the way back to you know when. I just can not believe that this company allows such insolence. It hurts my heart, Mr. Belfort, especially when we are in the middle of a pandemic and everything is just so uncertain. For someone such as Mr. Henderson to be allowed to change his hair color, and it is still nappy by the way, and compete under an alias after violating me last week is absolutely ridiculous!
Andre Walker: LADY! I am not SOSA Henderson.
(Kensingten rolls her eyes, but she finally turns around and looks over Andre. She takes a step back and squints, as if she is truly studying him and trying to find some kind of difference between the two. After a moment, the Southern Belle shrugs.)
Kensingten Calhoun-Astor: Oh. Well, all you people look alike anyway with the hair, and the nose, and well… everything else. It’s not like there’s any difference between the two of you. I am sure if you were to step into the ring with me Mister… not SOSA Henderson apparently, you would put your hands on me in an appropriate manner because it’s really all you know how to do when you see a woman such as myself.
(Walker is seething at this point, but he flashes Kensingten a sarcastic smile.)
Andre Walker: I can assure you that the only thing that would happen if the two of us were to step into the ring together is me beating you just like I beat Kasey earlier.
Kensingten Calhoun-Astor (chuckling ever so slightly): I’m sure, sir. Just like I taught Mr. Henderson a lesson in manners last week, I would teach you one as well. As if something such as you could get the better of me.
Andre Walker: Well, let’s put that to the test next week.
Kensingten Calhoun-Astor: … you’re serious?
(Walker stares right into Kensingten’s cruel blue eyes and smirks.)
Andre Walker: Very, and trust me, it’s going to take more than a bag with a brick to get one up over me.
(Walker takes a mocking bow in front of Kensingten before striding off, his challenge for next week put down. Kensingten watches him leave and shudders.)
Kensingten Calhoun-Astor: I need to take a shower now. I just feel the filth. God forgive me for being so ugly, but I will end that man next week.
(Kensingten walks off, leaving Belfort standing there alone.)
Michael Belfort: I guess we have a match for next week. Kensingten Calhoun-Astor versus Andre Walker!
(“Earned It” by Chief Keef hits, as Sosa Henderson steps out onto the stage wearing black sunglasses, black leather gloves, a black leather jacket, and a diamond chain that reads “SOSA” on it to complete the attire. Sosa makes his way down the ramp, as he flaunts his SOSA chain for the camera.)
Stephie Love: The following contest is a triple threat bout set for ONE FALL!!!!!!!!
Flannery McCoy: I guess I couldn’t do it this time..
Stephie Love: Introducing first.. From Hollywood, California!! Weighing in at 191lbs!!! BULLETPROOOOOF!!! HOLYWOOOOOOD SOSSSSAAAAAAA HENDERSON!!!!!!!
Jake Mercer: Now here is a man who has been keeping himself pretty busy since making his return to EAW recently. Sosa Henderson found himself in the opening five elitist match at Reckless Wiring and pulled out the victory against some of Dynasty’s finest young talents. However, last week in his Dynasty return match, he fell to Kensingten Calhoun-Astor after he was nailed by her Chanel bag that looked like it had a massive brick inside.
Stew-O: Sosa Henderson definitely lost a questionable match last week-
Jake Mercer: Questionable? These bitches love Sosa. They don’t love seeing Kensingten cheat to beat someone with as much influence to the culture as Sosa Henderson!
Stew-O: That may be true, but now it’s up to Sosa Henderson to bounce back and show everyone why he is the former New Breed Champion.
Flannery McCoy: He better, because with the amount of trash talking him, Ronan Malosi, and Korey Gaines exchanged last week, you can bet that those guys will have their eyes glued to this match as well!!
(Sosa Henderson is seen in the center of the ring taking his SOSA chain and shades off. He looks over at Stephie Love and gives her a quick wink, as she responds with a brief smile before realizing that they are both on live television. Sosa smirks and takes his leather jacket off, as “Earned It” fades out. “I Gave You Power,” by Nas begins to play, as bright white lights begin to flicker throughout the arena. Impact steps out onto the stage then takes a few steps before closing his eyes. He then opens his eyes back up, as he shows no emotion heading towards the ring. The camera man follows Impact and tries to get him to look at the camera, but Impact pays no attention to the camera and continues making his way to the ring as if the cameraman wasn’t even there)
Stephie Love: And his opponent!!! From Seattle, Washington!!! Weighing in at 240lbs!!! He is the most watched Champion in history!!!!!!!! IMPACCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCT!!!!!!!!!!
Stew-O: Here he is! One of the most decorated wrestlers in not just EAW, but all of wrestling sports entertainment history! Impact!
Jake Mercer: Last week Serena Bennet had a few words to say to and about Impact’s wife, Sienna Jade, however it wasn’t Sienna Jade that came out to defend herself. Instead it was this man right here who stepped out to the ring and told Serena Bennet off. Impact and Sienna Jade weren’t supposed to come back, but I guess Serena’s words were enough to bring the White Mamba back to Friday Nights.
(Impact is seen in the ring staring down Sosa Henderson, as Sosa Henderson doesn’t look to fond of the 9 time World Champion)
Flannery McCoy: Things got pretty heated between Sosa and Impact this week during the buildup for this match. Impact had a few words to say about Sosa’s mentor, Heart Break Boy, and from the looks of it, those words are still impacting Sosa in a negative way.
(Impact and Sosa Henderson start to take a few steps closer to each other as they begin to really stare each other down. The Nas track fades, as “Invincible” by Pop Smoke begins to play throughout the arena. Impact backs away from Sosa Henderson with a smirk on his face, as both competitors look towards the stage. Chris Elite steps out onto the stage wearing red tights with black trim and black boots. Chris walks down the ramp with a smile on his face, as he looks ready to take on both of the men standing in the ring)
Stephie Love: And their opponent!!! From Brooklyn, New York!! Weighing in at 210lbs!!! DETECTIVE SKABLER!!!!! CHRISSSSSSSSS ELITEEEEEEEEE!!!!!
Stew-O: And here’s the man who is the reason why this arena is so empty.
Flannery McCoy: He’s also one of the newest editions to the Dynasty roster. Things weren’t going as planned for Chris Elite on ShowDown, and he made it very clear last week that he’s using Cage as a way to catapult himself back to the top.
Stew-O: It’s to the point where Chris Elite is taking full advantage of his GAWD contract by adding in the stipulation that if Cage touches Chris Elite, he is fired.
Flannery McCoy: Not only that.. You can’t forget that Chris Elite is also the number one contender for Kassidy Heart’s National Elite Championship! Picking up a win here over Sosa Henderson and Impact would be huge heading into his future title match!!
(All three men are seen in the ring staring each other down. After all of the words being traded back and forth throughout the week between these three, you can feel the energy that radiates off of each competitor.)
(DING! DING! DING!)
Stew-O: And there’s the bell! This match starts off, as Chris Elite immediately drops to the mat, and rolls under the ropes to the ringside floor. He faces both Sosa and Impact, as they look back at him from inside the ring.
Sosa Henderson (Off-Mic): Really Nig-
Flannery McCoy: AND THERE’S THE WHITE MAMBA WITH A POWERFUL FOREARM TO THE BACK OF SOSA HENDERSON’S HEAD!! Sosa drops down to one knee. Impact grabs a hold of Sosa’s dreadlocks, as he uses them to keep Sosa in place for him to connect a headbutt! Sosa drops down to the mat instantly.
Jake Mercer: Impact looks over at Chris Elite to make sure Elite doesn’t try to cheap shot him. Elite is just standing on the outside though, as Impact continues his attack on Sosa Henderson. Impact grabs Sosa by the dreadlocks again, and brings him up to his feet. Impact connects with a fierce knife edge chop that smacks against Sosa Henderson’s chest! Sosa takes a few steps back, but is met by another knife edge chop by Impact before being irish whipped to the ropes! Sosa bounces back off the ropes! SPINNING WHEEL KICK BY IMPACT!!!!
Stew-O: NO!!! Sosa Henderson managed to duck underneath the leg and gets behind Impact! Impact turns around. SUPERKICK BY SOSA HENDERSON!!! NO!!! Impact catches the leg and tosses it right to the ground! Sosa stumbles forward due to the momentum, AND IMPACT TAKES HIM DOWN TO THE MAT WITH A RUNNING CLOTHESLINE!!!!!! Impact gets back up to his feet-
Flannery McCoy: IT’S CHRIS ELITE!!! HE SLIDES INTO THE RING AND GOES FOR THE ROLLING THUNDER DDT ONTO IMPACT!!!!!
Jake Mercer: NO!!!! IMPACT KEEPS CHRIS ELITE IN THE AIR, AND TOSSES HIM OVER THE TOP ROPE AND DOWN TO THE RINGSIDE FLOOR BEFORE CHRIS ELITE COULD FINISH THE MOVE!!!!!
(Impact walks over to the ropes and faces Chris Elite who is down at ringside)
Impact(Off-Mic): If you’re going to stay on the outside, then stay on the outside punk!
Jake Mercer: BUT LOOK! IT’S SOSA HENDERSON ROLLING IMPACT UP!!!! THE REFEREE DROPS DOWN FOR THE COUNT!!
Referee: ONEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!! TWOOOOOOOOOOO-
Stew-O: And there’s the kickout by the 9 time world champion! Sosa Henderson almost got away with that one right there!
Flannery McCoy: Sosa gets back up to his feet, as begins throwing right handed punches at Impact as he’s getting up to his feet as well! Impact stands all the way up, and shoves Sosa Henderson back! Sosa falls back against the ring ropes, and bounces back! Impact with another clothesline! NO!!! Sosa Henderson ducks underneath this time and gets behind Impact! Impact turns around!!! SUPERKICK BY SOSA HENDERSON!!! IT STUNS IMPACT, BUT THE HALL OF FAMER IS STANDING!!! Sosa Henderson exits the ring and stand on the apron! He grabs the top rope, and uses it to slingshot himself back into the ring!!! SLINGSHOT DOUBLE FOOTSTOMP ONTO IMPACT!!! IT CONNECTS!!!!!
(Chris Elite is seen getting up on the outside of the ring)
Jake Mercer: And now Sosa Henderson runs to the far ropes!! He bounces back, and runs past Impact!! AND SOSA HENDERSON LEAPS INTO THE AIR AND CONNECTS WITH OVER THE TOP ROPE MOONSAULT PLANCHA ONTO CHRIS ELITE WHO JUST GOT BACK TO HIS FEET!!!! Sosa Henderson has taken full control of this match, as he now begins to stomp down onto the chest of Chris Elite!!
Stew-O: Chris Elite is taking quite a bit damage right now, as each stomp can be heard all the way over here at ringside! Sosa grabs Chris Elite by the head and brings him up to his feet. Sosa then slams Chris Elite’s head onto the ring apron! He does it again!
Flannery McCoy: Wait no!! Chris Elite prevents his head from smacking against that ring apron, as he extends his arms out! Elite now connects with elbow shots to the chest and upper abdomen of Sosa Henderson, as Sosa is forced to back off. Chris Elite turns around, and shoves Sosa as Sosa falls back against the barricade that surrounds the ring!! Elite walks over to Sosa, and begins throwing right handed punches to the top of Sosa’s head!
Stew-O: Chris Elite managed to get some good shots on the former New Breed Champion, but it looks like he wants to take this back to the ring, as he grabs Sosa by the head and slides him back under through the ropes and into the ring. Chris Elite slides in right after!
Jake Mercer: But there’s Impact back on the attack, as he strikes Chris Elite with multiple forearm shots to the back of the head!! Impact grabs Chris Elite and pulls him in!! Impact lifts Chris Elite in the air!!! AND IMPACT CONNECTS WITH A POWERBOMB!!! Impact isn’t done yet though, as he keeps a good hold of Chris Elite and lifts him back up into that powerbomb position!!! AND IMPACT CONNECTS WITH A SECOND POWERBOMB THIS TIME SLAMMING CHRIS ELITE RIGHT INTO THE BODY OF SOSA HENDERSON WHO WAS LYING ON THE MAT BESIDE THEM!!!
Flannery McCoy: Both Chris Elite and Sosa Henderson are down, as Impact runs to the ropes! He leaps up, and does a backflip off the middle ropes!! FLIGHTY SIGHTS!!!! LIONSAULT ONTO BOTH CHRIS ELITE AND SOSA HENDERSON!!!! Impact now grabs Chris Elite and pushes his body off to the side, as he hooks Sosa Henderson’s legs!
Referee: ONEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!! TWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! THREE-
Jake Mercer: And there’s the kickout by Sosa Henderson! Impact has his attention on Chris Elite, as he now hooks Elite’s legs!!!
Referee: ONEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!! TWOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! THREEEEE-
Stew-O: And there’s the kickout by Chris Elite!!! Impact gets back up to his feet, as he grabs Chris Elite and brings him up to his feet as well. Impact connects with a hard knife edge chop before irish whipping Chris Elite to the corner! Elite crashes up against the turnbuckle! AND IMPACT CHARGES AT HIM AND GOES FOR A RUNNING DOUBLE KNEE STRIKE IN THE CORNER!!!
Flannery McCoy: BUT THE DETECTIVE SKABLER GETS OUT OF THE WAY JUST IN TIME, AS IMPACT’S KNEES BASH AGAINST THE TOP TURNBUCKLE BEFORE HE LANDS BACK DOWN ONTO THE MAT!!! Impact is clutching his knees after that move, as Chris Elite uses the side ropes to help bring himself up to his feet!! He now makes his way over to the corner, as he climbs up to the top rope! Impact is still on the ground, as Chris Elite leaps into the air!! BIONIC STOMP!!!!! THE MOONSAULT DOUBLE FOOTSTOMP CONNECTS RIGHT INTO THE CHEST OF IMPACT!!!!
Jake Mercer: But there’s Sosa Henderson! He wraps his arms around Chris Elite! He lifts him up!! BACK SUPLEX!!!
Flannery McCoy: NO!!!! Chris Elite flips in mid-air, as he lands on his feet behind Sosa Henderson and starts to run to the ropes! Chris Elite bounces back, as Sosa Henderson turns around!!! SHOTGUN DROPKICK RIGHT TO THE CHEST!!! Sosa Henderson’s body gets shoved right into the ring ropes by that dropkick, as he bounces back! OPEN YA MATA!!! THE JUMPING BICYCLE KNEE KICK CONNECTS RIGHT ONTO THE FACE OF THE RUNNING SOSA HENDERSON!!!! SOSA FALLS TO THE MAT INSTANTLY!!!!
Stew-O: And now Chris Elite walks beside the downed Sosa Henderson, and connects with a standing shooting star press!! Chris Elite quickly gets back up to his feet, as he walks over to Impact who is just now get up onto his hands and knees after that double foot stomp from earlier! Chris Elite has a good hold of Impact’s head, as he kicks Impact in the gut! He slowly brings impact up to his feet, then connects with two right handed punches! Impact staggers back but is met with a shoot kick to the chest and upper abdomen!! Chris elite now connects with a backfist and finishes it off with a lariat that sends Impact back down to the mat! That’s the 5 Borough Combo right there!!!
Jake Mercer: Chris Elite is really feeling it right now! He’s looking at both Impact and Sosa Henderson who are both trying to get back up to their feet! He’s setting himself up for something big!! Sosa Henderson gets up to his feet!! And Chris Elite goes for the BOX OFFICE SMASH!!!! NO!!!! SOSA HENDERSON DODGES THE SUPERKICK!!! Chris Elite missed Sosa entirely!!
Flannery McCoy: EVISCERATION!!!! IMPACT JUST GOT UP AND HIT THE DOUBLE KNEE FACEBUSTER ONTO CHRIS ELITE OUT OF NOWHERE!!! Chris Elite is stunned, as he walks right into STOLE YO BITCH!!! STOLE YO BITCH BY SOSA HENDERSON ONTO CHRIS ELITE!!!!! HE JUST HIT THAT CUTTER OUT OF NOWHERE AND CHRIS ELITE IS OUT COLD IN THE CENTER OF THE RING!!!!
Stew-O: Sosa Henderson and Impact are staring each other down in the center of the ring! Again these two had quite a few heated words about Sosa Henderson’s mentor and one of Impact’s greatest rivals, Heart Break Boy!! These two get a little closer.. AND SOSA HENDERSON DROPS IMPACT WITH A TACKLE AND BEGINS FIRING AWAY WITH RIGHTS AND LEFTS!! THIS IS FOR HEART BREAK BOY! THIS IS FOR THE DISRESPECT THAT IMPACT HAS SHOWN BOTH SOSA AND THE HEART BREAK BOY THIS WEEK!!! RIGHT! LEFT! RIGHT! LEFT!! SOSA ISN’T HOLDING BACK!!!! IMPACT IS TRYING TO COVER HIS FACE FROM ALL OF THESE PUNCHES, BUT SOSA IS THROWING SO MANY SO FAST THAT IT’S IMPOSSIBLE FOR IMPACT TO BLOCK THEM ALL!!!!
Jake Mercer: Sosa Henderson now stands up, and curb stomps down onto Impact’s head!! Sosa walks over to the corner, and climbs up to the top rope! He sets himself up, as he looks directly at Impact who’s below him!!! Sosa leaps into the air!!! SOSA BOMB!!!!! IT CONNECTS!!! SOSA HOOKS THE LEGS!!!
Referee: ONEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!! TWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! THREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE-
Stew-O: And Impact kicks out!!
Jake Mercer: Sosa Henderson is in shock! He thought he had the victory right there!!
(Sosa Henderson looks up at the referee and begins to argue about the count. The referee informs him that Impact did kick out just before the three. Sosa takes his attention away from the referee as he sees that no amount of arguing will change the call. Sosa rolls under the ring ropes to ringside and begins walking towards the commentary table.)
Jake Mercer: I love ya Sos, but there’s corona going around man. Keep your distance.
Flannery McCoy: He should have been tested and cleared to compete though.
Jake Mercer: Yeah, but you see how many bitches love that man? I wouldn’t be surprised if the corona isn’t the only pandemic virus Sosa’s carrying to be honest with you.
(Sosa Henderson walks right past the announce table, and grabs a steel chair that was set up right beside the ring bell for the person that rings the bell before and after the match. He walks back over to the ring, and tosses the chair over the top rope as it lands inside. Sosa reaches under the ring and grabs another steel chair. This time he slides into the ring with it)
Flannery McCoy: What the hell is Sosa Henderson planning to do here?!?
Jake Mercer: From the looks of it, I think he’s trying to end this once and for all!!!
Stew-O: Chris Elite is down! Impact is down! Sosa has two steel chairs in the ring! This doesn’t look too good for the other two!!
Jake Mercer: Sosa keeps the steel chair in his hands, as he walks over to Chris Elite and jams it into his chest as he lays on the ground!! Sosa now turns over to Impact and does the exact same thing! He walks back over to Chris Elite again!! AND AGAIN HE JAMS THAT STEEL CHAIR INTO THE CHEST AND RIBS OF CHRIS ELITE!!! Elite clutches at his ribs in pain!! Sosa goes back over to Impact! This time he turns Impact onto his stomach, and places the steel chair beneath his head!! Sosa grabs the other chair in the ring, as he places that one on top of Impact’s head!!
Flannery McCoy: Uh-oh..
Stew-O: Sosa Henderson is looking right at Impact with an evil stare. He lifts his foot up! He’s going for that Garnishment Curb Stomp!!!
Flannery McCoy: LOOK! IT’S KOREY GAINES!!!
Jake Mercer: WHAT THE HELL IS HE DOING HERE?!?!
Stew-O: KOREY GAINES JUST RAN DOWN THE RAMP, AND HE’S SLIDING INTO THE RING!!! Sosa sees Gaines, as he isn’t able to attempt a single curb stomp. Gaines charges at Sosa! Sosa with a right jab to the running Korey Gaines!
Jake Mercer: NO!!! Korey Gaines ducks under the arm, as he continues to run to the ropes! Gaines bounces back!! Sosa turns around!! AND KOREY GAINES CONNECTS WITH A DISCUS ELBOW SMASH THAT LANDS RIGHT ACROSS SOSA HENDERSON’S FACE!!! Sosa falls back up against the ring ropes, as Korey Gaines charges at him at full speed!!! AND KOREY GAINES CLOTHESLINES SOSA HENDERSON OUT OF THE RING AS SOSA LANDS ON THE GROUND ON THE OUTSIDE OF THE RING!!! Korey turns around and runs to the far ropes, he bounces back!! Sosa slowly getting up to his feet… SUICIDE DIVE BY KOREY GAINES!!! IT CONNECTS AS HE LANDS ON TOP OF SOSA HENDERSON!!!!
Stew-O: Korey gets right up, as he grabs Sosa by the hair, and brings him up to his feet! Korey with a kick to the midsection! Another! And Another! Korey now with a right hook!!
Flannery McCoy: But Sosa Henderson blocks it and goes for a right hook of his own! It connects!!! Korey and Sosa are trading punches back and forth, as they’re fighting up the entrance ramp!!
(Korey Gaines and Sosa Henderson continue fighting all the way up the ramp and back behind the stage, as the camera focuses back to the ring, where we see Impact looking up at the stage. Serena Bennet steps out onto the stage, as she now walks down the entrance ramp)
Flannery McCoy: AND NOW IT’S SERENA BENNET!! SERENA BENNET IS HERE!!!
Stew-O: And look at Impact! He’s slowly rolling under the ropes to the outside of the ring, as he begins to slowly make his way to Serena Bennet!
Jake Mercer: Impact is tired, but Serena doesn’t care, as she slaps the 9 time world champion right across the face! Serena with a right hand! Impact responds with a knife edge chop! Serena with another right! Impact with another chop! Now these two are going back and forth trading shots with one another! Kicks, punches, everything is being thrown between these two Elitists, as their fighting up the entrance ramp!!!
(Serena Bennet and Impact fight all the way up to the stage, before going behind the screen and taking the fight to the backstage area of the arena. Chris Elite is seen in the ring all by himself. He’s slowly crawling his way to the side ropes, as he uses them to help himself up. Chris Elite looks confused, as he has no idea where his two opponents went)
Chris Elite(Off-Mic): Wh-Where did everybody go? Did I win? Is Dynasty even live still!?!
(“Monster” by Kanye west hits, as Chris Elite is in total shock. He turns his head towards the stage, as he sees none other than the National Elite Champion, Kassidy Heart making her way down to the ring)
Stew-O: Welcome to the party Kassidy!
Flannery McCoy: The National Elite Champion slides under the bottom ropes, as Chris Elite tries to catch her off guard with a roundhouse kick! But no!! The Mauler dodges it, and connects with her own spinning heel kick that catches Chris Elite right across the jaw!! Elite grabs his jaw in pain! Kassidy stays on the attack, as she kicks Elite in the stomach! He falls back against the corner turnbuckle, and Kassidy continues to connect with various kicks to the midsection!!
Jake Mercer: Chris Eilte now fires back with punches! I don’t even think he’s aiming whatsoever! He’s just throwing wild punches hoping they connect!!
Stew-O: And they do!! Chris Elite manages to get Kassidy off of him in the corner, as now both Elitists are throwing punches back and forth!! The referee is trying to get in the middle of this, but there is nothing he can do to save this match!!!
(6 huge security guards storm the ring, as Kassidy Heart and Chris Elite are still going at it! The security guards grab a hold of both competitors and keep them apart. Kassidy is still trying to break free, as she doesn’t feel like she’s dealt enough damage to her number one contender! The security guards look like they’re struggling, but they manage to maintain the champion)
Flannery McCoy: So much is going on right now! So much to keep up with!! But this match has definitely been declared a draw, as there is no way that this match is going to go any longer.
Jake Mercer: Who cares about the match anymore Flannery!?! We just witnessed something wild!!
Stew-O: SOSA AND KOREY! IMPACT AND SERENA!! CHRIS ELITE AND KASSIDY HEART!!! All of the tension between the three elitists who were competing against each other along with the tension that they have with the individuals that invaded this match is insane! This is why Dynasty is the best show in sports entertainment!!
(Kassidy Heart and Chris Elite are seen still being held apart from one another, as the security guards are now walking Kassidy up the ramp, gripping her tight because she still wants a piece of Chris Elite. Elite has a pissed off look on his face, as he wants a piece of Kassidy Heart. The screen eventually fades to black, as the last thing we see is Kassidy staring back at Chris Elite from the entrance ramp)
Stew-O: I haven’t seen this many heavyweight competitors in one setting in a long time! What an explosive night it has been so far! Speaking of heavyweight competitors we have THE heavyweight competitor, our world champion Drake King defends his championship against Ronan Malosi… NEXT!
(The camera cuts to Stephie Love in the middle of the ring)
Stephie Love: Ladies and gentlemen, this is the MAIN EVENT! Scheduled for…
Crowd: ONE FALL!!!
Stephie Love: And it is for… THE EAW WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP!!!
(The camera then pans to before the entrances to the broadcasting booth. Sitting there other than the usual Stew-O, Flannery McCoy, and Jake Mercer is Lethal Consequences. LC is leaning back in his chair as he has a pair of aviators on, it’s hard to tell if he’s awake or not. Stew-O is poking him trying to see if he’s still awake while Jake Mercer is praising him)
Lethal Consequences: Get off me you fucking loser!
Stew-O: Well, welcome to the commentary booth?
Lethal Consequences: :dave:
Jake Mercer: My king has a way with words that is untouchable to anyone else. :blessed:
(The camera then moves away from the broadcasting booth to the stage as ‘Come On’ by Waterproof Blonde plays up as it’s clear who’s music this is. Ronan Malosi makes his way out to the stage with an absolute clear smug look on his face as he struts out with a cocky pip in his step. He lazily throws his head to the side looking around the arena to seeing an empty arena in which he can only give a chuckle in response to, clearly, he’s used to the boos he was going to get if the EAW Universe was filled to the brim in the arena. Along with his regular entrance attire, he’s wearing a custom made “Hot Takes” shirt which he brandishes and shows off to the camera and it’s clear he wears it with pride, especially with the reputation the show even has. He shakes his head as he focuses on the ring and begins to make his way to the ring)
Stephie Love: Introducing first… the challenger… from Cape Town, South Africa… weighing in at 280 pounds… THE CAPE TOWN CRIPPLER… RONAN MALOSI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Jake Mercer: LOOK AT THE ABSOLUTE RECEPTION RONAN IS GETTING!
Stew-O: :skip: Ronan certainly on cloud 9 with the opportunity he’s been given tonight, especially at the caliber it is at. After seemingly days of being disrespected with a reason of course but he doesn’t seem to be seeing that, surprisingly on this random episode of Dynasty he’s managed to crawl himself into a world title opportunity, what gives?
Flannery McCoy: I don’t know, that’s beyond me. But one thing I do know is the fact that despite such a random offering that Ronan is going to make the best of this undeserving opportunity he’s been given by Dynasty and put his best foot forward. Of course, he seems like the “underdog” in this match not truly expected to be the one to win. I don’t expect him to truly win but who knows? We might just be seeing our next World Heavyweight Champion right here. Anything can happen, and we’re at that point where we just have to wait and see.
Lethal Consequences: You really think this vermin is going to win? You absolute idiots.
(Ronan slowly takes his time making his way to the ring as he still brandishes and keeps that smug look on his face as he does so. He takes steps up the steel steps slowly clearly overexaggerating as he can only help but laugh as he does so. He begins to enter the ring and take a few spins around before making his way to the center of the ring and spreading his arms out basking at the moment for a minute as he closes his eyes giving a smirk as he does so. Clearly he’s in the position where even though he lost last week he’s still doing much better than the people that beat him, so he has a “right” to take advantage of that and celebrate for that sole reason. Finally, he makes his way to his corner as he begins to warm up as ‘Come On’ fades out. He takes a look around for a moment before yelling in the air so everyone around the arena and in the backstage area can hear)
Ronan Malosi: HOT TAKE! YOU’RE LOOKING AT YOUR NEXT WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION RIGHT HERE!
(You could practically hear the invisible crowd groan as Ronan speaks. ‘Zero’ by Crown The Empire then plays up as strobe lights begin to flash around the arena. Drake King makes his way out to the stage as the World Heavyweight Championship is slung around his shoulder. Despite everything that happened last week sprinkled with frustration and disappointment, he has a determined look on his face as he begins to make his way to the ring. He stares a hole into Ronan as Ronan easily shrugs it off not worrying about what ‘The Paragon’ has in store for him)
Stephie Love: And his opponent… from Charlotte, North Carolina… weighing in at 220 pounds… He is the WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION… THE PARAGON… DRAKE KING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Stew-O: As for our World Heavyweight Champion coming into this title defense he is fresh off of being a trendsetter in this business. Not only, of course, winning the World Heavyweight Championship from the previous champion TLA, but of course, becoming a triple crown and a double champion at the same time winning the Unified Tag Team Championship in the process. Then proceeding onto the next week defending the title once more in a Dome of Deathmatch.
Flannery McCoy: Truly one of the few workhorses we have in this business. And with that with what he claimed as his own such as the champion titles and the accomplishments over the past few weeks he’s not going to let it burn to dust tonight if he puts up a losing effort, of course, he’s here to win. I wouldn’t take it away from him of course because he’s shown constantly he can live up to expectation, and tonight might just be the night where he shines the brightest.
Jake Mercer: I only let my opinions be based on the special guest’s opinion, what do you think grand overlord LC?
Lethal Consequences: Mr. King is simply keeping that title warm for me, I refrain myself from speaking and dapping him up more than poor Vizzy already does.
Jake Mercer: :wow:
(Drake King swiftly makes his way down the ramp still keeping that determined look on his face as he walks up the steel steps slowly and onto the apron as before he enters the ring he takes a look at the cocky Ronan Malosi who has positioned himself on the opposite side of the ring of the champion. Sure Drake believes that he can beat Ronan but that doesn’t mean he should take this match as a joke, he’s coming in 100% focused like he always is when his championship is put up for grabs no matter who his opponent is. Drake shakes his head as he enters the ring and raises the World Heavyweight Championship high in the air before going to his corner. ‘Zero’ begins to fade out as Drake makes his way to his corner and begins to warm up as he hands the World Heavyweight Championship over to the Ref as he begins to take his vest off. The Ref makes his way to the center of the ring as he raises the World Heavyweight Championship high in the air before peeking his head through the ring ropes and handing the World Heavyweight Championship out of the ring before signaling for the bell getting this title match underway)
(DING! DING! DING!)
Stew-O: Here we go as this World Heavyweight Championship match is officially underway! Drake is quickly circling around as Ronan begins to move out of his corner. RONAN RUNNING RIGHT AT DRAKE AS HE MAULS HIM RIGHT DOWN BARGING HIS SHOULDER RIGHT INTO HIS CHEST! Drake falls back first flat on the ground as he begins to sit up and shaking his head as he quickly gets up to his feet. One thing that hasn’t changed from Malosi is that look that he keeps on his face oozing with confidence, I’m sure he believes he can be the one that comes out with the World Heavyweight Championship tonight!
Flannery McCoy: Ronan quickly beginning to grab him but Drake quickly slides forward and goes under and through ‘The Cape Town Crippler’! Ronan quickly gaining a sense of direction as Drake quickly slides smoothly up to his feet before Ronan can realize what’s coming towards him! DRAKE WITH A MIDSECTION SUPERKICK RIGHT TO THE GUT OF RONAN SENDING HIM BACKWARDS! Ronan is persistent though as he’s quickly pulling himself up to his feet and running towards the World Heavyweight Champion!
Jake Mercer: The 10x Golden Glove Winner is taken right down to the ground by the offense upheld by Drake King tonight! Ronan quickly sitting up as Drake runs to the ropes and back right to Ronan! DRAKE LOOKING TO DRIVE HIS BOOT RIGHT INTO THE FACE OF RONAN BUT RONAN QUICKLY GRABS IT BEFORE IMPACT! Ronan slowly bringing himself back up as it seems Drake is in a rough spot right here! RONAN DRIVING HIS ELBOW RIGHT INTO THE CALF OF DRAKE KING SENDING HIM DOWN TO THE GROUND!
Lethal Consequences: Fucking pussy.
Stew-O: Ronan now quickly grabbing the leg of Drake as he takes advantage of the situation lifting it high in the air! Ronan kicking away now on the back of the leg of Drake as he’s practically just wringing it out right now! Ronan dragging Drake to the center of the ring as there seems to be no escape for the Champ right now! RONAN DROPPING DOWN RIGHT ON DRAKE’S LEG WITH A ELBOW DROP!
Flannery McCoy: Ronan targetting the right leg of Drake King now as Drake is slowly dragging himself to the ropes propping himself up in the corner. Ronan quickly running as Drake doesn’t see it! RONAN WITH A CORNER CLOTHESLINE! BUT DRAKE QUICKLY ROLLING OUT OF THE WAY BEFORE ANY HARM CAN BE DONE! Drake rolling up to his feet as Ronan ricochets off the corner and turns around to face him! PRELUDE TO JUSTICE! NO! RONAN BARELY SLIPPING OUT OF THE DOUBLE UNDERHOOK FACEBUSTER BEFORE DRAKE COULD EXECUTE IT HERE! Drake stumbling backward as Ronan is waiting for him! SLEEPING PILL! RONAN PUSHING FORWARD AND DRIVING HIS KNEE RIGHT INTO THE CRANIUM OF DRAKE KING TAKING HIM DOWN! Ronan quickly falling forward as he goes for a pin attempt on the World Heavyweight Champion!
Jake Mercer: KICKOUT BY KING!
Lethal Consequences: I would’ve taken him out with a single move that’s the dealbreaker that comes with me, I take the title and I embarrass him in the process like the half-witted imbecile he is.
Stew-O: Drake King fighting on as it’s clear frustration is starting to grow on the face of Ronan Malosi as this match progresses on and Drake is continuing with that persistence that is strengthed in him. Ronan quickly grabbing Drake by the neck as he’s dragging him up with rugged force before throwing him into the corner. Drake quickly bounces out though as he’s running towards Ronan! RONAN WITH A CLOTHESLINE! BUT DRAKE DUCKS UNDER AS HE USES THE MOMENTUM TO SWING HIMSELF THROUGH THE ROPES AND ONTO THE APRON TO TAKE FLIGHT! SPRINGBOARD CLOTHESLINE TAKES RONAN DOWN TO THE GROUND!
Flannery McCoy: Drake quickly rolling up to his feet as Ronan is quickly up to his feet yet still stunned. PRELUDE TO JUSTICE! DOUBLE UNDERHOOK FACEBUTER FINALLY CONNECTS OUT OF NOWHERE! RONAN IS TAKEN DOWN AS DRAKE QUICKLY HOOKS THE LEG GOING FOR THE PIN HOPING FOR HIS REIGN TO LIVE ANOTHER DAY!
Jake Mercer: RONAN MALOSI POWERS OUT! THE WIDOWMAKER LIVES ANOTHER DAY AS HE CONTINUES TO FIGHT THROUGH THICK AND THIN!
Lethal Consequences: Yeah c’mon whoever in god’s name you happen to be, win this goddamn match and make the easy pickings even easier when I gain my sweet championship belt.
Stew-O: Drake quickly getting up to his feet as he’s not going to take the time to wait it out and question what went wrong in his attempt to get the win. Drake waiting practically stalking Ronan Malosi at this very moment, lurking for the moment when he gets up to his feet. Ronan on all fours as Drake sees an opportunity quickly rebounding like a boomerang off the ropes and back to the ‘Cape Town Crippler’! DREAM CRUSHER!
Flannery McCoy: DOESN’T CONNECT! RONAN QUICKLY ROLLING AWAY FROM THE STOMP BEFORE IT COULD CONNECT AND POSSIBLY END THIS MATCH! Drake stumbling away caught unprepared by the sudden escape out of the move as Ronan is readying up! THE WIDOWMAKER! FALLAWAY SAMOAN DROP CONNECTS AS RONAN CONNECTS ANOTHER BIG MOVE ON DRAKE ONCE MORE! This could be leading once more to another big move that could end this match by Ronan as Drake is slowly beginning to pull himself up as Ronan looks like a predator stalking the prey! THE SOUVENIR!
Jake Mercer: FAILS TO CONNECT! ‘THE PARAGON’ MANAGES TO DUCK UNDER THE PULL BACK ELBOW STRIKE BEFORE ANY SIGNIFICANT HARM CAN BE DONE TO HIM! Ronan stumbling forward again once more as Drake quickly turns around and waits for Ronan stalking him till his last breath! SUPERKICK! Superkick connects right to the jaw of Ronan Malosi as he spins around dizzied as Drake quickly grabs him once more! DRAKE CONNECTING WITH A GERMAN SUPLEX!
Lethal Consequences: Fucking dropped the ball…
Stew-O: Ronan falling into the corner as Drake gets up to his feet and quickly runs towards him! RONAN WITH A KICK RIGHT TO THE FACE OF DRAKE! Drake stumbling down to a knee as Ronan is quickly climbing up to the top rope looking to fly! But Drake is quickly joining him up there as he quickly climbs the turnbuckles and up to the top rope along with him! Drake and Ronan quickly exchanging fist both of them don’t want to fall to their demise, one of them is going to have to though!
Flannery McCoy: BUT DRAKE RAMMING A KNEE RIGHT INTO THE FACE OF RONAN! Ronan is stunned as he’s clearly perplexed at Drake’s burst of life in this match! Drake quickly grabbing Ronan as this clearly spells trouble for him and this is not good! DRAKE WITH A SUPERPLEX! The World Heavyweight Champion keeping that momentum as he keeps a hold of Ronan and lifts him off the ground! DAWN OF JUSTICE! SINGLE UNDERHOOK BRAINBUSTER CONNECTS AS DRAKE QUICKLY GOES FOR THE PIN-
Jake Mercer: WAIT! RONAN! RONAN WITH A BURST OF LIFE AS HE GRABS THE NECK OF DRAKE AND ROLLS HIM UP QUICKLY! NOT LIKE THIS! NOT LIKE THIS!
Lethal Consequences: Absolute cac…
Stew-O: DRAKE BARELY KICKS OUT! Ronan could not be angrier but he’s not letting that infest him as he’s getting up to his feet looking to use this advantage to the best of his abilities! THE WIDOW’S END! HOLY STUFFING! DRAKE REVERSING THE SWINGING SIDE SLAM INTO A STO OUT OF NOWHERE THE QUICKNESS OF DRAKE! Ronan not taken down as he’s quickly trying to crawl up as he just had the breath taken out of him! WAIT!
Flannery McCoy: DREAM CRUSHER! CURB STOMP OUT OF NOWHERE AS RONAN IS IMPALED RIGHT INTO THE GROUND! DRAKE WITH SUCH QUICKNESS AND CRAFTINESS AS HE QUICKLY ROLLS ‘THE CAPETOWN CRIPPLER’ ONTO HIS BACK AND GOES FOR THE PIN! WILL DRAKE KING KEEP HIS WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP?!
(DING! DING! DING!)
(‘Zero’ plays up as Drake King rolls himself off of Ronan Malosi in pure exhaustion. He lays on his back for a moment and gives a deep breath before slowly beginning to pull himself up with the help of the Ref as he does so. The Ref walks over and takes the World Heavyweight Championship and hands it to Drake as he can’t help but look at it with a smirk. He clutches it close to his chest for a moment as he falls into the ropes before raising it high in the air so the camera can see his crown jewel, his magnum opus, his championship)
Stephie Love: Ladies and gentlemen here is your winner, AND STILL… EAW WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION… DRAKE KING!!!!!!!!!!
Jake Mercer: DAMMIT! NOW, THIS IS A HOT TAKE! RONAN MALOSI SHOULD’VE WON! HE SHOULD’VE TOOK THE CHAMPIONSHIP! THIS IS UNFAIR! BLASPHEMY! I DEMAND A RECOUNT!
Stew-O: :skip: Drake King managing to come out still your World Heavyweight Champion! I will say Ronan put up some impressive effort and managed to push Drake to his limit no matter how unlikely he was to do so. But at the end of the day, Drake managed to take advantage of his craftiness and skillset and come out still your World Heavyweight Champion tonight!
Flannery McCoy: But it seems our special guest commentator has something to say about it. :ohlawd:
Lethal Consequences: Naw, fuck this.
(Lethal Consequences throws his headset onto the broadcast booth as he pushes himself out of his chair and goes onto the apron. Drake King turns still clutching his World Heavyweight Championship as he notices him. LC begins ranting yelling some major profanities as Drake scoffs as he does so. Drake raises the World Heavyweight Championship in a cocky way as LC is enraged by that response by ‘The Paragon’. Dynasty fades out to the last shot of Drake keeping the title raised high in the air as he rolls out of the ring and walks away as the camera finally cuts to black)
(EAW logo buzzes.)