(EAW intro plays.)
(A recap of last week’s Dynasty episode is shown. Veena Adams kicks off the show to announce Dynasty’s biggest acquisition of the Season, which is none other than the EAW Hall of Famer and former World Champion, Vic Vendetta. He hypes up the crowd before being interrupted by Jake Smith. Both of them argue before Vic takes him down with a ‘Raging Bull’ superkick before setting him up for HOV but Jake escapes out of the ring before that can happen. Allen Hunter gets a win over two prospects in the form of ULTIMO and Cash Coleman. While Komatsu Ogawa gets a quick win over the debuting Colt Hendrix. Lethal Consequences vents out his anger in the ring before he’s interrupted by the World Heavyweight Champion, The Visual Prophet. He’s tired of hearing his pity parade and grants him an entry into the Extreme Elimination Chamber at Road To Redemption which LC reiterates and says that he made a mistake joking around with him as he’s going to be the one taking the World Heavyweight Championship away from him. Meanwhile Goldheart get a major win in their tag team debut as Limmy Monaghan and Mason Massacre beat the team of Adam Lucas and the PURE Champion, Dray Fontana. Nina Bravo enters into the office of StarrStan as Starr grants her her reward for her win at House of Glass and being screwed out of her match at Dynasty against Mason Massacre and that was an entry into the Specialists Chamber at Road To Redemption. The New Breed Champion, Andre Walker gets a hard fought victory over one-half of the Unified Tag Team Champions, Harper Lee. Meanwhile MITSUBACHI gets a shocking victory with the help of Komatsu Ogawa over Xander Payne heading into Road To Redemption. The Liquid Swordz regroup after their losses at House of Glass with Molly Waters as they focus their attention on the fact that they’re favorites in the Grand Prix tournament and that they’re going to get their spot in the finals and win the whole thing. And in the main event of the show, The Blicky Boyz, Malcolm Jones and Chris Elite get a win over the House of Leaders, Drake King & Darcy May Morgan to advance to the semi-finals of the tournament to the dismay of Drake & Darcy as the recap ends from there)
(EAW Intro Plays.)
(A recap of the previous episode of Dynasty is shown. We see Veena Adams welcoming the returning Vic Vendetta as he is confronted by Jake Smith. The 2018 Hall of Fame star and the former two time Pure Champion share words before coming to blows. We see a big win for Allen Hunter in the very first match of the evening. Colt Hendrix falls to a motivated Komatsu Ogawa with MISTSUBACHI by his side. After this, we witness a pissed off LC be met by World Heavyweight champion The Visual Prophet as LC and Viz rekindle familiar beef. Viz offers LC a shot at his title via the upcoming Extreme Elimination Chamber at Road to Redemption. A tag team victory is shown as Limmy Monaghan and Mason Massacre known as Goldheart defeat Dray Fontana and Adam Lucas. Next we see Nina Bravo speaking with StarrStan about her entering the Specialist Chamber chamber as a reward for beating Jalyn Garcia at the last fpv. We next are shown highlights of an incredible Andre Walker vs Harper Lee non title bout which sees Andre take the win. After this, MITSUBACHI and Xander Payne have an extreme elimination chamber match up that sees MITSUBACHI pick up the win. We see an incredible interview with The Liquid Swordz as Mr. DEDEDE and Impact let the world know that despite recent losses that they still run the industry and EAW. Lastly, we see the classic main event as the next big Grand Prix match goes off between The Blicky Boyz and The House of Leaders. Malcolm Jones and Chris Elite defeat Darcy May Morgan and Drake King as Jones and Elite left the show after advancing to the next round.)
(The recap ends as the show begins.)
(We see the parking lot of the World 1 Theatre as in speeds a 2020 Lamborghini Huracan EVO. The orange paint job is glaring and eye catching as the super car parks awkwardly not too far from the entrance into the building.)
Jake Mercer: Ah shit, DEDEDE got a new toy I see.
(Suddenly, the suicide door pops up as out steps…Ms. Extreme to a large pop as she is sporting an orange and black outfit. A black mink coat, orange tank top, black denim jeans, a pair of tinted Cartier glasses, and black heels as Ms Extreme walks over to the valet person and tosses her keys as they bounce off his face.)
Ms. Extreme: Take care of my baby, kid. Or else I’ll take care of you. :tyson:
Valet Guy: :will:
(Ms Extreme brushes pass him and confidently walks through the backstage area with tunnel vision as she passes by many Dynasty staff and a few lower famed Elitists.)
Stew-O: Well…this isn’t how I expected this weeks episode of Friday Night Dynasty was going to begin but it looks like we have a motivated and focus Ms Extreme showing up in the flashiest car I’ve seen in a long time!
Flannery McCoy: Stew-O, Flannery McCoy, and Jake Mercer here as we are scheduled to put on a big show tonight as we continue on the path to Road to Redemprion!
Jake Mercer: She threw those keys like Kyler Murray! I hope that kids ok. :wow:
(We see Ms. Extreme approach the guerilla position as she rolls her neck and shakes her wrists.)
Jake Mercer: The gorilla position, named in honor of the late great “Gorilla Man” who died in a tragic match with the also late great Pizza Boy in “Stupid Names Wrestling” promotion a few years back. May they Rest In Peace!
(“Gangster” by New Year’s Day blasts as our steps the hyped up Ms. Extreme. The Voltage star spins around as the crowd cheers and she points to the ring. Ironically, the entire ring is set up exactly like the Blue Carpet Treatment talk show Universal Women’s Champion Serena Bennett hosts but instead of her iconic Crip blue it’s all orange. The carpet is orange, the seats are orange, and instead of Crip-A-Cola bottles on ice they show bottles of “Cam-Soda” with Camille’s face on the bottle. Ms. Extreme walks down the ramp as the crowd continues cheering.)
Jake Mercer: I thought I read the card wrong but indeed it looks like we are getting a new episode of The Orange Carpet treatment!
Flannery McCoy: New episode? Don’t you mean first episode?
Jake Mercer: Oh, naive Flannery!
Flannery McCoy: :thefuck:
Jake Mercer: Ms Extreme has actually been doing Orange Carpet treatment long before Serena Bennett did Blue Carpet Treatments. Thing is, Camille only did it on Telemundo but EAW finally got the rights to the show!
Flannery McCoy: Oh so it’s like Fresh Prince of Bel Air airing on HBO Max huh?
Jake Mercer: Exactly right, Flan-
Flannery McCoy: Man shut the fuck up lying.
Jake Mercer: :will: Man.
(We see all over the ring pictures of matches where Ms. Extreme was victorious and Serena lost. We see the triple threat match Serena lost alongside Ahren Fournier a year ago and the War Games match Serena was the captain of on Dynasty that loses to Ms Extreme and Team Voltage.)
Stew-O: This could be a very spicy segment considering the animosity Extreme and Serena have for one another and with that Universal Women’s title being the prize both covet!
(Ms. Extreme walks in the ring and snatches a microphone.)
Ms. Extreme: Well would you look at this? Not a shabby setup I must say? You guys like what I did with the place? Fancy orange everything, all orange furnishings, oh and the art work! Who doesn’t love the artwork?
(Ms. Extreme points at a few particular images of Serena looking salty, upset, and angry at the losses she sustained against Ms. Extreme in the past.)
Ms. Extreme: Now I know you guys over here in Dynasty are used to the Blue Carpet Treatment. Well, as you can already see, this isn’t that. This is The Orange Carpet Treatment and I’m here as your humble host ready to dish out the tea as they say on Black Twitter and discuss the number one topic at hand. No it isn’t about Birkin bags or the presidential election. No, I’m here to discuss your Universal Women’s Champion Serena Bennett and despite me dominating her repeatedly…her having an inability to keep my name out of her mouth. I’m here to talk about Serena and her being incapable of dislodging my metaphorical dick from her throat. I have heard Cam Newton refer to her as the throat goat and clearly it’s true considering how she can’t seem to leave me and my name alone. Despite her having clearer things she should be focused on, opponents she should be aimed at, and goals she could be keyed into handling…Serena Bennett has found a way to mention me damn near weekly for some time now.
(Ms. Extreme removes her shades and starts pacing.)
Ms. Extreme: I think I have my reasons why Serena Bennett would be so obsessed with not just Ms. Extreme. I have some idea on why Serena can’t keep Camille Jane Fernandez-Ava and all of Ava’s names out of her blue lipstick covered lips. It’s not just because we all do better work. It’s not just because collectively and individually we are better athletes than her. It’s not even the fact that I’m superior to her and have marquee wins against her to cite. It’s because no matter what she has done, no matter what famous athletes and elitists she’s screwed, no matter how much soda she has peddled or gang affiliations she has promoted…she has never been as important as any single Ava sister in her entire career. Not Consuela, not Cam, and especially not me. Besides the fact people are obligated to mention her in promos and by proxy care about her to a degree, she is and never has been as prominent as anyone in my family and it shows. Her insecurity with her placement despite her immense success is disgusting to be frank. Imagine being a TWO TIME Universal Women’s Champion, imagine winning a Grand Rampage winner, yet nobody besides your tag team partner rates you on par with me. That stings because it’s true, doesn’t it? You are on top of the women’s division yet you can’t sleep at night because the family that built this company don’t worship the ground you Crip walk on. You are Universal Women’s champ yet you can’t be happy until you prove yourself to me. So…
(Ms. Extreme turns to the camera.)
Ms. Extreme: I’m finally making your dreams come true, Serena. The holidays are coming up and as everyone knows, Ava Christmas is a lot better than a lot of families Christmas days ever could be. I’m a charitable individual if you guys weren’t aware. I’m all for helping the less fortunate. From the homeless like Mark Michaels to the hopeless like Serena, I just like to give. Maybe it won’t work but…I just like to give! So here I am finally giving Serena the one on one match up she has been panhandling for. For so long you have wanted “this smoke” as you likely would put it. Call me Ms Chimney because I’d love some Serena smoke this holiday season myself. A gift for a gift. You can say you fought me one one one and I can say I’ve defeated you once again! I mean, I could always use more art for my collection and nothing looks better than seeing a bitter, stupid, choke artist Serena Bennett framed and blow up for me and everyone to longingly gaze upon at times of leisure!
(Suddenly, “Surfin’” by Kid Cudi and Pharrell blasts. Serena appears on stage in not the best moods as she is wearing blue jeans, a studded bra, a sheer top, and her hair in an updo. Her championship gold shimmers in the light as she has it across her stomach. Bennet shakes her head and raises the microphone up to her lips.)
Serena Bennett: Ok. First of all…this orange is tacky, lame, corny, and annoying.
Ms. Extreme: To each’s own. Different strokes for different folks.
Serena Bennett: Nah, fuck all that. This is horrendously trash. You really want to take it there with our upcoming match? Because I dissed you a few times? Just because you have unrelated confidence that because you caught me off guard last year that you can do it again this year? Listen, this won’t be the first time in 2020 an Orange racist lost decisively for the entire country to see. Ain’t gonna be no recounting, just a three count and a referee raising my hand while you and that loud mouth of yours is choking on your own blood on your back wishing you never opened Pandora’s box and pissed me off. You hyping up a War Games win when neither of us laid a hand on each other is lame. You bragging about beating me on a team I was the captain of when you refused to even speak on my name in the lead up is cowardly. Maybe you was scared and now you hype off some “Orange Bull” energy drinks, wearing this hideous fake fur coat, and are trying to pick a fight with a girl you never wanted a fight with before for real. You got a win against me in a triple threat and are trying to equate that to challenging me one on one? Is you stoopid, dumb, or stoopid? I’ve beaten one Ava already to defend my title, Camille. Looks like I’ll have the honor and pleasure of putting another Ava in her place as well.
Ms. Extreme: You must have been eating the same grapes your Shea Butter Baby best friend has been because you sound as delusional as him. You got one Ava but now you have to deal with me. You failed as captain of Team Dynasty and had to come back as a surprise member this season where you were put together with Impact and Mr. DEDEDE in order to be carried to a win.
Serena Bennett: Carried? Everyone knows you were carried last year to that fluke ass win! Look at where Team Voltage has fallen this season! Andrea Valentine last important match was getting beaten by that very Shea Butter Babies goat partner of mine, Raven Roberts peaked as a Tag Champion and is AWOL, and you are a fish floundering looking for the last bit of relevancy you can claim besides being the third most popular Ava. All three of you broads WISH you could have the run I’m having now. I’m approaching double champ status while you are out here cosplaying as me. Make that make some sense, bitch!
Ms. Extreme: Making sense of you is illogical. You dick rode Cam Newton then abandoned him the first sign of a decline. You were the captain of the SOSA Henderson hype train, he declined a little, you left him, he comes back and is better than ever. You HATED Viz, he wins the World Heavyweight championship and suddenly you beg him to be your tag team partner. You chase relevancy and clique hop like a groupie the second things get dicey. The irony of a person joining a gang but never exhibiting loyalty to anyone she personally links to.
Serena Bennett: Me and Viz friendship grew and since we both run our divisions, we can relate in ways you can’t understand. You see, this belt is bigger than just the PURE title you used to have. Remember? When Mark Michaels beat your ass as snatched away the crowning achievement of your career? Kind of like when I first lost this Universal Championship minutes after winning it at Pain for Pride previously. Now? Now I’m on top again and I’m never coming down.
Ms. Extreme: Funny gal. When I was PURE Champion running Dynasty, weren’t you and the rest of the girls on Empire crying about your status? While the lot of you were screaming FUCK EMPIRE and still being stuck on Empire, I was on male dominated brands dominating men. We don’t move the same, Serena. You talk the talk but I walk the walk.
Serena Bennett: First of all that wasn’t me, second of all you live off the past. I’m on top of the fucking world RIGHT NOW and I’m never coming down to your level again, scrub ass bitch..
Ms. Extreme: You should be used to stuff coming down considering how much dick you have sucked in your entire career. You sucked every melanated dick this side of the equator and you’re going to have to make room in your anorexic stomach for some crow because that’s what you’ll be eating when we face one another for that Universal Women’s championship. That and another big fucking L to me. But, that’s something you should be used to eating…right Serena?!
Serena Bennett: :tyson:
Ms. Extreme: :adpeek: See you at the ppv, bro!
(Ms Extreme theme hits once again. Serena rushes the ring but Ms. Extreme drops down and evades her. Ms. Extreme rolls out of the ring via bottom rope as Serena rises off the mat and stares her down. Camille mocks Serena by imitating her infamous walk as Serena curses her out.)
Stew-O: Jesus, this blockbuster of a match up that was announced back on Voltage has just gotten even more personal! Ms. Extreme taking on Serena Bennett one on one for the Universal Women’s Championship? Can’t wait to see it!
Flannery McCoy: I’d pay money to see that fight by itself! The rest of Road to Redemption could be just Big Bhampionship matches or Fight Grid exclusives with that as the only main event to be honest!
Jake Mercer: The betting odds for this one is about to be crazy! If I hadn’t bought all that Fisker stock I’d have extra money to put on this potential five star classic! Six if we had it held in the Tokyo dome! I can’t wait to read the dirt sheet posts about this backstage rivalry!
(We see a finally shot of Serena in the ring tearing down the pictures Camille had of her and turns to see Ms. Extreme pointing and laughing as she walks backwards up the entrance ramp.)
(A commercial for stress balls starring Bronson Daniels. Need help coping over a shocking outcome but can’t use your usual “therapeutic” measures to cope with it? Sadly this is all we have left, no weed :mjcry:.)
Stew-O: Welcome back to Friday Night’s Dynasty and do we have a match-up or what next, as the EAW New Breed Champion Andre Walker takes on an interesting prospect in Allen Hunter. Right now, we’re joined by the number-one contender to Walker’s title – Voltage’s Donovan Duke!
Donovan Duke: Good evening Stew, how are you?
Stew-O: Um… I’m great thank you; the more important question is how are you feeling?
Donovan Duke: Ah you know, just enjoying the show we’ve got ahead of us. Also, I’d like to thank you guys for the cup of coffee.
Stephie Love: The following contest is a Non-Title Match and it is scheduled for one fall!
(The sound of the crowd dies as suddenly pyro hits from the top corners of the entrance ramp as ‘Fight Song’ by Marilyn Manson blares through the PA system. The camera pans the crowd and on return to the ramp standing with a scarf draped over his shoulders, head down, he slowly lifts his head looking out into the crowd panning left to right. With a swagger, Allen Hunter begins walking down the ramp as he mouths inaudible words to the crowd.)
Stephie Love: And their opponent… Weighing in at 310lbs… from Denver, Colorado… ALLEN… HUNTER!!!
Jake Mercer: This guy right here is the future of EAW. Did you see how he dispatched of Cash Coleman AND ULTIMO last week?
Stew-O: It was certainly impressive.
Donovan Duke: Yeah, but he’s up against Andre Walker, the New Breed Champion. The difference in quality will be on display tonight.
Jake Mercer: He faced two opponents last week and won with ease, I have no doubts about Allen getting the job done. You know, I bumped into Allen backstage before the show and he’s asked me to do a count for the number of moves he’s going to use before beating Andre Walker.
(“GATTI” by JACKBOYS, Pop Smoke hits as the virtual crowd monitor speakers begin to exhibit cheering noises.)
Stephie Love: And his opponent from Brooklyn, New York…. weighing in at 185 pounds… he is “Friday Night’s Faith” and he is the EAW NEW BREED CHAMPION OF THE WOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRRLLLLLDDDDDDDDDDDD…….. ANDRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRE WALKERRRR!!!!!!!!!!!
(Out comes the favorite Andre Walker, making his way to the ring woo walking as he takes notice of the number one contender to his New Breed Champion. He goes before sliding in under the ropes.)
Flannery McCoy: Out comes the New Breed Champion and I still can’t over that brutal burial of Christian DeMarco at House of Glass.
Donovan Duke: Definitely, that was hell of an interesting match for sure. Performances like that are the reason he’s the champ but nobody’s ever a champion, forever right?
Jake Mercer: And you think you have what it takes to win the title?
Donovan Duke: Well there isn’t any doubt if you ask me, Andre Walker is good but he’s never had a challenge like me before. I might not be as big a name as some of the people he’s beat but everyone’s gotta start from somewhere.
(Andre raises up the New Breed Championship high in the air for all to see on the top turnbuckle. Walker dismounts from the turnbuckles with his prized possession and hits the canvas as the Ref signals for the bell from there quickly.)
(DING DING DING!)
(The bell rings as Andre Walker is stunned as he eats a right-hand shot from Allen Hunter, the former dropping his New Breed Championship outside at ringside.)
Stew-O: Walker is given no time to regroup as Hunter begins delivering further strikes to his cornered adversary with the referee finally deciding to intervene.
Referee: Cut it out Allen! ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR!
Flannery McCoy: Allen is smart enough not to get disqualified as he withdraws from his ambush and backs up into the center of the ring. And now it looks like the champ has been given time to regroup.
Donovan Duke: Certainly an interesting tactic for sure, dirty I can say, but hey can’t blame him. It’s how they go about a match and I’m not going to try to disgrace that, if it’s going to get him the victory hey go for it.
Jake Mercer: Walker’s not going to take advantage of that though and he’s going to come straight at Hunter for that sneak attack and he kicks Hunter in the abdomen.
Stew-O: NO, HE DOESN’T! ALLEN CATCHES THE BOOT AND COUNTERS WITH ‘THE LEGEND’ STUNNER!!!!! LOOKS LIKE HUNTER IS GOING TO GET THE W ALREADY WITH ONE MOVE!!!
Donovan Duke: Is that his finishing move…….
Flannery McCoy: Yes…….
Jake Mercer: The Stunner seems to have minimal damage to Walker who just falls back into the eastern ropes behind him before rebounding and levelling Hunter with a bicycle kick!
Stew-O: The kick sends Allen floundering to his knees. Walker darts to the ropes again, returning to connect with a bicycle knee strike to Hunter’s skull.
Flannery McCoy: He’s not done there – Walker darts to the ropes again and takes to the ground – what a Springboard Moonsault! Look at that, that’s a three-hundred pound man writhing on the mat in pain. Now, what’s he doing?
Jake Mercer: Andre Walker is climbing to the top rope now and I’m not sure how wise this is. He’s giving Allen Hunter time to recover now. The weakened Hunter is using the ropes to guide himself back to his feet as he holds his ribs in anguish-
Stew-O: INCOMING! DIVING METEORA ONTO THE LOOSE SHOULDERS OF HUNTER – ANDRE WALKER IMPALES HIM TO THE CANVAS WITH THAT KNEE ATTACK.
Donovan Duke: Shoulders down Andre going for the pin!
Stew-O: I didn’t know you did commentary?
Donovan Duke: Why not? That’s what I’m here for right?
Referee: ONE!!!! TWO!!!!!
Flannery McCoy: Andre just rolled off of Hunter- Oh boy, looks like he’s going into overkill again. Here’s the thing though. Allen Hunter has a hundred pounds on Walker, there’s not a great deal that Andre can do.
Jake Mercer: He’s dragging that deadweight of Allen Hunter’s toward the eastern side of the ring and he’s going to drape the upper body of his opponent onto the bottom rope. I tell you what, Allen Hunter doesn’t look so bright right now. He can hardly keep his eyes open-
Stew-O: Andre Walker with a Superkick from the outside! And immediately we see a stray tooth of Allen Hunter flying away, oh my god look at the blood beginning to stream out of Hunter’s mouth. Allen catches his breath and immediately sputters as he swallows his own blood, oblivious to how badly he is being beaten.
Donovan Duke: Wait a minute- I think this is more than just a few coughs.
Stew-O: Allen Hunter falls onto his back and he reaches his hand up as he calls out. I think he’s crying out for help.
Allen Hunter: I can’t do this anymore!
Jake Mercer: Andre is standing at ringside and looking disgusted as Allen Hunter is pleading with the referee – I think, to throw the match!
Stew-O: It seems as if Hunter’s pleading has fallen on deaf ears as Walker storms into the ring and begins stomping at the face of the fallen Hunter! Allen is reaching up-
Allen Hunter: I’m sorry! I’m sorry! You win!
Donovan Duke: I don’t know how much of this I can stomach…
Stew-O: Well it appears as if this match is going to stop as the referee calls for the bell!
(Andre continues stomping away at the desperate Hunter as the latter cowers again to the bottom rope, trying to find refuge as Walker continues digging his boot into the back of Hunter’s neck but the referee has already thrown the match.)
(DING DING DING)
Stephie Love: Allen Hunter has forfeited the match. As a result, here is your winner by submission… ANDREEEEEEEEEEEEE…. WALKEEEEEEERRRRRRRRR…
(Allen Hunter slopes the rest of his body over the rope and slithers out of the ring, barely able to cower away from ringside. As he heads away from his victorious foe who is reunited with his New Breed Championship prize.)
Jake Mercer: Well, I didn’t see this coming.
Stew-O: Really? Walker has been on such an impressive roll lately.
Jake Mercer: I meant; I didn’t expect Allen to be a bozo. Well Donovan, it looks like you’ve got a hell of a challenge ahead of you.
Donovan Duke: Well, I expect nothing less from this man, Andre Walker. I’ve got a hell lot of respect for this man and what he’s done over the last several months. Hang on-
(Andre Walker stands atop the turnbuckle – hoisting his EAW New Breed Championship as he fixates on the number one contender Donovan Duke. Allen Hunter scurries to the announcer’s table, babbling as the sharp anguish of his ripped gums takes over his self-restraint and he motions to Donovan Duke.)
Allen Hunter: I’m done with this company; I can’t take it. Say one word about how he’s posted 10 promos and has 50 grammatical errors along with the anger of me double posting him but x2 and you got HR down your throats. Good luck against that son of a bitch, you’re gonna need it-
Donovan Duke: Whatever you just said buddy…
(Donovan Duke whacks his empty coffee mug over the skull of Hunter’s! Allen is left grounded as the ceramic pieces of crockery splint into the skin of Hunter’s. The three commentators – as well as the on-watching Andre Walker are shocked by Donovan Duke’s sudden violent impulse.)
Donovan Duke: What? He brought it upon himself.
Jake Mercer: That’s fair.
(Meanwhile Walker in the ring shrugs his shoulders as Duke points at the man he challenges for the EAW New Breed Championship as the two competitors stare off as the screen fades to commercial.)
(A commercial for Ronan Malosi’s new IPhone app “The Womanizer”, now with the touch of a button, you a woman today)
(Dynasty comes back from commercial break as the camera fades into the backstage area where Nina Bravo is shown standing in front of the Russian flag as their national anthem plays loudly over it.)
Nina Bravo: Good evening you foolish Americans. You think that because you elected the orange man out of office that now you are free from Big Daddy Putin? No of course not just like the Soviet Union he will rise again. Or someone will because it sounds like he is going to be confined to a wheelchair going forward. Which is as good of a transition as any into talking about my announced opponents each of which will most certainly be in a wheelchair as well when I get done with them. Only then will I have that Championship gold around my waist and as I walk around with it all you lowly cripples will look up to me and bear witness to my glory.
(Nina Bravo does a quick spin to show herself off for the camera.)
Nina Bravo: Honestly it makes me sad to think how trash my opponents are. I mean you are putting me into a match with Candice Blair. The adopted Ava. Also Lisa Wren who I didn’t even know was on the roster until today. Let us discuss this adopted bimbo first. In my homeland we would not adopt something so vile like this. We would leave baby Candice outside in the woods for the wolves. It is only natural and only right but Candice is simply too selfish with her American greed and cannot see the bigger picture and the greater good her sacrifice would mean for her country. Don’t worry I will come thru for my American comrades when I rid you of this burden to the state. Mhm maybe I should do the same for the entire Ava family but honestly that is more of a YOU problem and certainly not mine. Awww Candice you mad now hun? Well you are going to be both mad and unable to do anything about it when we step in that hellacious structure together and only one of us walks out.
(Nina Bravo is shown walking as if she was on a cat walk to demonstrate both her beauty and that her opponent will soon not be walking at all.)
Nina Bravo: Then we have Lisa Wren and she is a classic example of the So-Called American Dream in action. She didn’t even used to be relevant and now I actually have to talk about her. This is class mobility at work and we need to put a stop to that real quick. People like Lisa Wren should just be happy where they are and happy to be here. She should just continue collecting a paycheck losing to fine ass wrestlers like myself and stop even trying to make something of herself. But it is all futile in the end anyway because she is going to be the plaything of the Russian Doll. I will make her do everything I say. She will be the puppet on the end of my strings and I will make her dance for me because we all know that when Lisa Wren tries to dance she inevitably trips. She tries so hard! But why? Just to fail inevitably? Don’t worry Lisa I will free you from the burden of trying to be successful and you can go back to doing what you do best. Just doing enough bare minimum to get by.
(Nina Bravo mockingly wipes tears from her eyes as she asks Lisa to the camera “U MAD? U MAD GURL?”.)
Nina Bravo: Then of course we have the champion herself. Kasey Kaos. I’m sure her middle name starts with K too but let’s not get into that right now. Kasey is basically the female Eclipse Diemos except he was actually scary. Kasey is just a try hard and newsflash bitch! Halloween was last month! Get with the times! We all know that you don’t even deserve that gold but apparently we all have to pretend that you are somehow a threat to me. Like as if! I am Nina motherfucking Bravo and you are going to be my bitch just like you are everyone else’s. Of course you will never be a man’s bitch because none of them will touch your creepy ass. If you want to find a man half as fine as Vizzy, maybe drop the whole C-List horror villain makeup, get some implants and actually make yourself desirable. Cuz girl let me tell you ain’t nobody want none of your creepy stalker ass. I bet you were the girl in high school who sat in the corner applying more eyeshadow and slitting your wrists because the entire football team wouldn’t even look at you. They were too busy with the popular girls like myself. I’m sorry Kasey but people like you don’t get to be on top! Time to send you back to the loser’s table to sit alone while the beautiful cheerleader like myself becomes the rightful Queen of this company!
(Nina Bravo places an ornate crown on her head and winks at the camera.)
Nina Bravo: Oh god she so stupid! I will introduce her to Mother Russia because she will never be a mother herself! Really rub it in after I take her title! The gold will be all m-
(Suddenly the lights shut off.)
Nina Bravo: Oh god is this country really so trash you don’t even have functioning electricity? Hahaha how third world this is!
(Suddenly a bright red light begins shining and flashing above Nina and some sort of liquid begins to drip down onto her forehead.)
Nina Bravo: Uh??? AIIIIIIII!!!!! EEEEKKKK!!!
(Nina Bravo tries to wipe the mysterious red liquid off of her but it appears to be sticky and she gets her hand stuck in her hair. She screams and turns around but the lights suddenly shut off and a pair of bright red eyes open up on screen.)
Nina Bravo: HELP! GUARDS! GUARDS! LEAVE ME ALONE YOU PSYCHO BITCH!!!
(A loud female cackling noise is heard as that’s the last thing heard accompanied by the bright red eyes from before as from there the camera fades to black)
(The camera cuts to a commercial for the upcoming EAW Network special about the top 100 Nirvana stans in EAW history.)
(To Hell or the Hangman by Primordial plays in the arena. Cash comes out, looking at the Dynasty crowd for a brief moment as he absorbs the virtual fans’ boos before smirking and making his way down to the ring.)
Stephie Love: The following contest is scheduled for ONE FALL!!!! Making his way to the ring, weighing in at 233 pounds… from Cork, Ireland… He is the Rebel City Reject!! CASH…. COLEMAN!!!
Stew-O: Here comes Cash Coleman, an intriguing prospect who has shown that he has a bright future ahead of him if he keeps at it. Last week, he was unfortunate as of not to win last week’s triple threat at the behest of Allen Hunter… but Coleman was not pinned and tonight he has a chance to pick up where he left off.
Jake Mercer: These men of GAWD are benevolent; you could argue that Cash offered up ULTIMO to Allen Hunter as a gift.
Flannery McCoy: You don’t seriously believe that, surely? Coleman was furious after Allen Hunter stole the win.
(Cash enters the ring, momentarily dropping to his knees as he is in prayer. Somehow the boos manage to get louder as War by Grandson plays. Out comes Jake Smith to a chorus of audience dissent, ignorant of the reception he’s receiving as he looks onward at his adversary tonight.)
Stephie Love: And his opponent! Making his way to the ring, weighing in at 210 pounds… residing from Atlantic City, New Jersey… The Godsend…. JAKE…. SMITH!!!!
Flannery McCoy: It appears Jake Smith is in a bit of a bad mood.
Jake Mercer: Do you blame him? Vic Vendetta is great and everything but Jake felt like he was being given an opportunity to shine when he was traded to Dynasty and now, he sees a former World Champion come back, immediately branded as the acquisition of the season.
Stew-O: This is what we’re referring to when Jake Smith met Vic Vendetta last week.
(We see snippets of Vic Vendetta’s return segment where a bemused Jake Smith came out to interrupt and lament the 2018 Hall of Famer’s presence. Smith had tried ambushing Vendetta with a microphone but the latter connected with the ‘Raging Bull’ Superkick. The picture refocuses on the ring where Jake Smith scowls at the titantron. The music fades away as the bells toll to signify the match commencing)
(DING DING DING)
Stew-O: We’re underway!
Jake Mercer: And Cash Coleman is straight out the gates, charging at Jake Smith! Look at the fire in his eyes, it’s clear he’s in it to win it tonight! And he might just do so, imagine getting the win over an Elitist like Jake Smith-
Flannery McCoy: SUPERKICK!!!!
Stew-O: Smith has just floored Cash Coleman with that sudden Superkick and it’s like he just saw Vic Vendetta instead.
(Jake looks down at him with a cold look on his face as Cash is absolutely shocked. He looks around unknowing of where he is as he crawls up to his knees, using Jake as reliance as he quickly shoves him away and runs past him to the ropes)
Flannery McCoy: SO LONG & GOODNIGHT!
Jake Mercer: THE MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE NAMED SHINING WIZARD CONNECTS ONTO THE BACK OF CASH COLEMAN’S HEAD COMPLETELY KNOCKING HIM OUT COLD!
Stew-O: But oh dear it seems he isn’t done here, he’s grabbing Cash’s arms as he lifts him up just elevated a bit off the ground as he raises a foot up.
Flannery McCoy: HE’S GOING FOR CRUSHCRUSHCRUSH! BUT HE ISN’T STOPPING AT 3! REMINISCE OF WHAT HAPPENED AT GRAND RAMPAGE WHEN HE LET OUT ALL HIS ANGER AT JACOB SENN WHEN HE REVEALED HE WAS SANTO MUERTE! HE’S LETTING OUT ALL THAT ANGER AS HE’S CAVING A HOLE INTO THE FACE OF CASH COLEMAN JUST OBLITERATION HIM AS FINALLY HE THROWS HIM BACK DOWN TO THE GROUND!
(Jake looks up as the crowd showers boos down at him before looking over to the camera as he grabs Cash Coleman and lifts him up once more)
Jake Mercer: WHAT?! JAKE IS LOCKING IN AFTER DARK! THAT’S A FINISHING MOVE OF VIC VENDETTA! MODIFIED DRAGON SLEEPER IS LOCKED IN AS CASH COLEMAN IS ALREADY OUT! THE REF DOESN’T SEE A POINT IN CHECKING ON HIM AS HE’S ALREADY SIGNALING FOR THE BELL! IT’S OVER!
(DING DING DING)
(War by Grandson plays once more as Jake Smith keeps the hold in for a bit longer before shoving Cash away as he gets up to his feet and shakes his head in disapproval, almost shocked how easy it was to put away his opponent tonight. He stands up as his arm is nonchalantly raised in victory.)
Stephie Love: HERE IS YOUR WINNER…. JAKEEEEEEEEEEEE… SMITHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!
Jake Mercer: I expected the Jake Smith Show to run a bit longer tonight, he just laid waste to Coleman without breaking a sweat tonight.
Flannery McCoy: Interesting choice of move from Smith, locking in After Dark, the move of the recently returned Vic Vendetta adding insult to injury as I’m sure he got a message out to the former World Champion and EAW Hall of Famer tonight.
(The last shot seen in the ring is Jake standing with his left heel atop the fallen Coleman as his arm remains raised as Dynasty fades out to commercial.)
(A commercial for the new Land Before Time movie starring Andre Walker where he tries to climb up a dinosaur and do… interesting things to it to say the very least)
(The camera returns from commercial break as PURE Champion Dray Fontana is seen in the ring as ‘Pure Water’ is playing in the background as he paces around the ring with a mic in his hand as ‘Pure Water’ fades out and he begins to speak)
Dray Fontana: You know a lot of people didn’t expect me to be where I’m at now. I was never expected to be PURE Champion, just the cliche successful first title defense sacrifice for Xander. Then, I wasn’t supposed to walk out champion still against Impact. While I can’t say I defeated him due to it being a draw, I CAN confidently say that Impact didn’t beat me either, and the multiple time world champion didn’t have what it took to take the title off of little old me. Now here I am standing in front of you all STILL the PURE Champion. I was doubted then and yet one thing that sticks out like a sore thumb is the fact that I am still doubted now. You know what happens every time I face doubt? I overcome the odds and that’s been the theme for this year and it’ll continue to be the theme. Everyone they put in front of me will face the same fate as the others and that goes for Adam Lucas and Limmy Monaghan as well. You guys will continue to sleep on me and I’m going to keep waking you all up to the point where I’m undeniable and at this rate I feel like I already am. I feel like I can take anyone and I’ll go as far to say I am the BEST champion on this brand and if not… I will be soon. I’m already on track to being the best PURE Champion this company has ever seen, so why not? Because I have a triple threat coming up with “odds” stacked against me as if I haven’t defied odds all season? Adam Lucas can’t hang with me because he can’t handle that pressure. We saw what happened last time he came close to a title shot. He shat the bed. He lost to Sienna Jade just for her to turn around and lose the same title to Myles. Yet he thinks he can beat me? The Prince, Dray Fontana?
(Dray laughs at the thought of Adam Lucas beating him and has he settles down he begins to speak again)
Dray Fontana: The dude who got traded for not even a family sized pack of skittles and some scratch offs is going to beat me? It’s like everyone else has said to you and it’ll continue to stay the same, you have no value in this company. Voltage had no use for you and after I run through you neither will Dynasty. You are going to do what you do best, and fail yet again in a championship match. By the way, you are also the reason we lost to those two nobodies last week when we should’ve won. Speaking of which hey Limmy! Still hiding behind people to make you look better huh? Did it with the Grand Athletes now with Mason Massacre, a name he got at a buffet, not for being a massacre in the ring by the way. See Limmy the Grand Athletes splitting up was supposed to be your breakout moment for you to show what you could do on your own and you got tired of it in like a month and found another partner to do your bidding.
Dray Fontana: That’s why we can never be the same, I am fine by myself and I can do anything by myself and never needed another man to do it for me. Impact didn’t have enough to win the title off of me and you guys really think those two are going to beat me? Those two together aren’t even half the Elitist he is! So again, Adam Lucas and Limmy Monaghan are going to beat me? That doesn’t make any sense whatsoever but that’s just how this company works sometimes right? I’ve proven you idiots wrong time and time again and have beat the odds every time they were against me and still that’s not enough? That still doesn’t mean anything? I warned you already though, keep glossing over me and I’m going to wake you up every single time until you get tired of it and have no choice but to pay attention. I am the elitist to beat right now and not one of you, not the two morons I face at Road to Redemption, not Impact nor any other veteran who steps up to the plate will get the satisfaction of doing so! I am the Prince, I am Dray fucking Fontana and you know what? You can even add Mason to the equation and nothing will change. I walk into Road to Redemption and I will leave as the champion.
Dray Fontana: Nothing will change that because I control my own destiny. With that being said, until I decide I have fulfilled my mission and it’s time to take something from The Visual Prophet, I have a lot of people to knock off. I still have people I want to defend this title against, still have people I’m hoping musters up the courage to challenge me, but until then my focus is on Adam and Limmy, two people who will have to do everything in their power to defeat me and that won’t even be enough. Like I said, if Mason wants to help out trying to play captain save a wasted talent then so be it my win will just be that much better knowing two clowns and outside help from another still wasn’t enough to put me down. I’m so confident Road to Redemption could come early just so I can get it out the way now. Those two don’t deserve to be on one of the biggest shows of the year anyway, especially against the likes of me so how about thi-
Stew-O: IT LOOKS LIKE MASON MASSACRE HAS HEARD ENOUGH AS HE SNEAKS INTO THE RING AND BLASTS DRAY FROM BEHIND!
Jake Mercer: AY FUCKING YO! HOWEVER STEW WAS RIGHT MASON IS GOING TO WORK ON THE PURE CHAMPION RIGHT NOW!
Flannery McCoy: NOW HERE COMES LIMMY TO JOIN IN ON THE ASSAULT! THEY ARE STOMPING HIM INTO THE GROUND!
STEW-O: MASON LIFTS HIM UP FOR THE 562!!! THE FIREMAN’S CARRY SLIDE SLAM RIGHT INTO THE MAT! NOW IT SEEMS TO BE LIMMY’S TURN!
Jake Mercer: WAIT ADAM LUCAS! MASON AND LIMMY SKATE OUT OF THE RING!
Flannery McCoy: Adam stares down the two elitist as they are shown laughing at their actions, Adam proceeds to help up Dray even after all he said about him just moment ag-
Jake Mercer: IT LOOKS LIKE YOU SPOKE TO SOON ADAM THROWS DRAY INTO THE ROPES AND AS DRAY RICOCHETS BACK ADAM CONNECTS WITH A VICIOUS POP-UP POWER BOMB! Sending a message to Dray he proceeds to lift up the PURE Championship over his head and stares at it before laying it down back next to him.
Stew-O: Not a great night whatsoever for Dray Fontana but I can guarantee there will be consequences for all 3 of these Elitists sooner than later!
(The last shot is of Adam holding up the PURE Championship as he looks down at a laid out Dray Fontana as both members of Goldheart are retreating up the ramp as the camera fades out)
(A commercial supporting unionization and how if you express your siding with it publicly, we promise you that EAW won’t release you 5 minutes after :wow:.)
(The camera cuts to Stephie Love in the ring.)
Stephie Love: The following contest is scheduled for one fall!
Virtual Crowd: ONE FALL!!!
(‘It Follows’ by Cane Hill blasts through the speakers as boos rain down from the crowd in response.)
Stephie Love: Introducing first from the exotic lands of Canada weighing in at 250 pounds he is “The Wrestling Genius” XXXXANDDDERRRRR PAYNE!!!
(Xander Payne makes his way to the ring looking bored and like he wants to get this over with.)
Flannery McCoy: Well Xander may seem disinterested but knowing him that is definitely not the case.
Stew-O: Indeed his opponents should not take him lightly. They should definitely take Xander heavily.
Jake Mercer: Why should we care about this match? Because the dirt sheets will give in 8 stars because there are Japanese guys in it? Give me a break!
Flannery McCoy: We apologize to our Japanese viewers Jake’s views do not represent anyone even Jake.
(“The Invisible Wall” By The GazettE blasts across the speakers to a mixed reaction from the crowd.)
Stephie Love: And his opponent from Kabukicho, Tokyo, Japan weighing in at 251 pounds he is “The Ungovernable” KOMATSUUUUUUU OOOOOOOGAWAAAA!!!!
(Komatsu Ogawa is shown with a devious grin on his face as he is accompanied by MITSUBACHI out to the ring.)
Jake Mercer: Ah it would appear they plan to cheat in this match.
Stew-O: Come on Jake that’s not what this means. MITSUBISHI might just be out here for moral support!
Jake Mercer: :usure:
Flannery McCoy: Well I am surprised that Komatsu Ogawa actually weighs more than Xander otherwise I would have said bringing his friend was evening the odds.
Jake Mercer: Flannery agrees with me! Today is a glorious day for Jake Mercer.
(DING! DING! DING!)
Flannery McCoy: We are underway as immediately Xander Payne gets caught with a hard right forearm from Komatsu Ogawa who begins to chop away at his chest. Xander pushes Komatsu back up against the ropes nearly sending him out of the ring but Komatsu bounces back and hits Xander with another heavy forearm this time with a running start. Xander staggers back but then bounces off the ropes himself and takes down Komatsu with a Big Boot to the skull. Komatsu right back up as he begins to trade chops in the ring with Xander. Xander rakes the eyes of Komatsu before biting him in the nose and hooking his head to take his opponent down with a quick DDT. Komatsu is reeling now as Xander runs the ropes and hits an absolutely earthquake causing Running Splash across the ring on Komatsu. Xander now goes for the first cover of this match.
Referee: ONEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!! TWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!! THRRRRRRRRRRRR-
Stew-O: Kick out by Komatsu Ogawa! Xander Payne looks disappointed that this match ins’t already over. I guess he wanted an easy night but you should never expect that from Komatsu. Komatsu back up as he squares off against Xander who tries to hit him with another big boot but Komatsu ducks beneath. He throws some strikes into the gut of Xander but Xander counters them with his arms and grabs Komatsu lifting him up for a quick powerslam. Komatsu rolls thru but this time Xander connects with the Big Boot taking him down as Xander transitions into a cover.
Jake Mercer: Quick kickout by Komatsu Ogawa as Xander Payne grabs his arm wrenching him right on back up to his feet. Xander twists the arm around before driving his shoulder into the shoulder socket of Ogawa. Xander drapes Ogawa’s arm over the top rope slamming it down it repeatedly. Down goes Komatsu as he favors the arm but Xander yanks on it pulling it back up. He hooks the arm as he is going for a Suplex! Komatsu up in the air as Xander has the stalling Suplex going!
Flannery McCoy: NO! Komatsu Ogawa reverses the Stalling Suplex in midair transitioning into a Reverse DDT as he falls behind Xander Payne! Down goes Xander as Komatsu takes advantage with a quick Elbow Drop and a Running Knee Strike to the skull of the downed Xander. Xander in trouble as Komatsu hits another series of elbow drops before going for the pin.
Referee: ONEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!! TW-
Stew-O: Kick out by Xander Payne as Komatsu Ogawa quickly embraces him into a Sleeper Hold. He has it locked tight as Xander sits on his ass in the ring struggling to get out of it. Xander is fading but he is fighting striking away at Komatsu from behind. Komatsu has had enough as he breaks the hold and drives his elbow down hard on top of the head of Xander. Xander rolls into the corner but Komatsu meets him there with a Running Enzuigiri in the corner. Xander staggers out of the corner but catches himself on the top rope following it into the next corner on the other side of the ring. Komatsu follows him over and begins throwing heavy Shoulder Thrusts into the substantial gut of Xander. Xander is reeling here as MITSUBACHI is shown jumping for joy on the outside of the ring. Komatsu taking control here as he continues to gore Xander in the corner. He pulls Xander out as Xander gets in a cheap shot! But Komatsu ducks and hits a Spinning Back Hand to the face of Xander! Xander staggers between the middle ropes nearly diving out of the ring but Komatsu instead rolls out of the ring grabbing his opponent by the head.
Flannery McCoy: Komatsu Ogawa grabbing Xander Payne’s head thru the middle ropes as he yanks him out of the ring. But before he can fully pull him out of the ring he pulls downward driving Xander’s head right down into the hardest part of the ring! Xander falls out of the ring but lands on the apron as Komatsu quickly shoves him back in and goes for the cover!
Referee: ONEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!! THRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR-
Jake Mercer: Kickout by Xander Payne but damn that had to have hurt when he had his head dropped like that! Now Komatsu Ogawa goes in for the Sleeper Hold… NO! Xander Payne grabs Ogawa by the throat! Ogawa hits the hand out of the way but now Xander fighting back with a series of strikes rocking Ogawa back! Ogawa thrown across the ring by Xander who grabs his throat yet again! But Ogawa lands on his feet! He runs up the top rope! Flying Crossbody off the top! But Xander Payne grabs him by the arm in midair taking him into a quick arm drag! Komatsu back up as Xander grabs him by the throat with both hands quickly and throws Ogawa up in the air. Pop Up Powerbomb connects! No! Ogawa in midair counters into a Spinning Arm Takedown with a palm on the back of the head of Xander to push him down to the mat! The cover!
Stew-O: Holy shit! Xander Payne kicks out with authority! Xander kips up to his feet with insane agility as he takes down Komatsu Ogawa with a Running Headscizzors. Xander runs off the ropes and connects with a Springboard Moonsault before mounting Komatsu and delivering a series of punches! Xander pulls up Komatsu into a Piledriver position… he drops Komatsu down on his head with a Sit Down Powerbomb! But Xander is not finished! MITSUBACHI now up on the apron as Xander comes in to smash into him with a Big Boot knocking him off the apron! Xander turns as Komatsu goes in with a Superkick! No! Xander was waiting for him! He dodges it! Komatsu caught by Xander who pulls him up into a Piledriver position! This time he spins it around as he goes down! THE PAYNEKILLER CONNECTS! XANDER GOES FOR THE COVER TO FINISH IT!!! MITSUBACHI IS BACK UP!!!
Referee: ONEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Jake Mercer: MITSUBACHI SLIDES INTO THE RING!!!
(DING! DING! DING!)
Flannery McCoy: But he’s too late!!!
(‘It Follows’ hits once more as Xander Payne gets up to his feet. The Ref comes over to raise his hand in victory but before he’s able to do so Xander is immediately jumped by MITSUBACHI after the bell.)
Stew-O: Oh come on! You were too late buddy! Xander has won! No need to be attacking him like this!
(MITSUBACHI hits a low blow on Xander Payne as Komatsu Ogawa is shown sliding out of the ring to grab a steel chair. Ogawa slides the chair back in the ring.)
Flannery McCoy: Xander is being ganged up on! Komatsu Ogawa is pissed he lost! Wait what the hell?
(Komatsu Ogawa slides the chair into the ring. But he accidentally slid it to Xander instead!!!)
Jake Mercer: Xander Payne swings the chair knocking MITSUBACHI over the top rope and landing on Komatsu Ogawa on the outside! Xander with the chair now begging them to get back in the ring but it looks like Ogawa is carrying MITSUBACHI to the back!
Flannery McCoy: Probably a smart choice!
Stephie Love: The winner of this match… XXXANDER PAYYYYYYYNNNNEEEE!!!!!
(Komatsu Ogawa and MITSUBACHI are shown yelling at Xander in Japanese as they escape to the back.)
Stew-O: They seem vengeful. Xander better watch his back!!!
(The camera cuts to a commercial for the #RecountTheVote movement where past losers of the EAW awards are shown demanding recounts for awards shows dating back to 2007.)
(Dynasty fades back from commercial break, a shot of Stephie love is shown. She’s inside of the ring with a microphone in hand, waiting for the arrival of our next bout’s competitors.)
Flannery McCoy: What a Dynasty it’s been thus far and the action isn’t stopping yet!
Stephie Love: LADIES AND GENTLEMAN, THE FOLLOWING CONTEST IS A SINGLES MATCH, SCHEDULED FOR ONE FALL!!
(‘Survival’ by Eminem begins to play as Adam Lucas enthusiastically makes his way onto the Dynasty stage.)
Stephie Love: INTRODUCING FIRST, WRESTLING OUT OF NEW YORK, USA, WEIGHING IN AT 231 POUNDS!!! ‘THEEEEEEEEE NEXTTTTT LEEVELLLLLL’ ADAMMMMMMMM LUCCCASSSSSSS!!!
Jake Mercer: This young man has become a supernova of potential since arriving on Dynasty, gaming wins over top names and now having that chance in front of him once more, in Chris Elite. A win over Chris Elite would do great things for the momentum of Adam Lucas heading into Road to Redemption, but that;s easier said than done. Chris Elite’s one of the most accomplished and decorated names this roster has, this a true test for Adam Lucas tonight!
‘Invincible’ by Pop Smoke replaces the sound as Chris Elite struts on stage. Brash and confident as usual.)
Stephie Love: AND HIS OPPONENT, WEIGHING IN AT 210 POUNDS! WRESTLING OUT OF BROOKLYN, NEW YORK! CHRISSSSSS ‘MONEY MAKIN’ BHRIS’ ELITEEEEEEE!!!
Stew-O: Chris hasn’t had kind things to say about Adam Lucas and tonight is his chance to make good on his goal of getting back to Dynasty’s throne. Chris Elite’s undoubtedly one of EAW’s most athletic, talented, and accomplished athletes, but Lucas has been on a hot streak of victories recently. Chris Elite sliding into the ring, not wasting time with semantics, he wants to get this match started! Oh, boy! We’re in for a good one!
(DING! DING! DING!)
Flannnery McCoy: Chris Elite and Adam Lucas begin with a collar and elbow tie-up. Chris pressuring Adam back to the corner, quickly Chris Elite gains the edge in this match. Chris releases his hold after the refreer’s count, and slaps Adam Lucas! Chris Elite with the ultimate disrespect to Adam Lucas, who’s been quite vocal in the build up to this match. Lucas looks for a dropkick, but Chris avoids it as Adam hits the canvas hard! Chris drags Lucas back to his feet, The Dickeatery Stopper! That Tyson-like uppercut plants Adam Lucas once more, Chris Elite is off to a fantastic start!
Jake Mercer: Chris is the more experienced of the two, though Adam Lucas is never to be counted out! Lucas on wobbly legs, Chris fires off a punch! Adam Lucas ducks under it, gets behind Chris, he’s looking for a German Suplex on Elite! Chris Elite with a nasty elbow to the head of Lucas, who’s forced to release the hold. Adam back into the corner, Chris charges towards him- BUT LUCAS NAILS ELITE WITH A BIG DROPKICK TO THE FACE! WOW, WHAT ELEVATION! He took Chris Elite to the dentist with that kick, Elite had it telecasted earlier, but Adam Lucas landed it big-time now!
Stew-O: Lucas wasting no time, looking for a sharpshooter! Chris Elite scrambles to the bottom rope, Adam tries to drag him back to the center of the ring, but Chris Elite meets him with an up-kick to the chin! That boot to the face of Adam Lucas, now Chsi Elite back to his feet, rushing Adam Lucas, then sat back down with a big forearm from Adam Lucas! And again! Adam Lucas gaining momentum in this match, NOW HITS CHRIS ELITE WITH A NASTY STEP-UP ENZIGURI! CHRIS ELITE IS STUNNED, HE’S ON WOBBLY LEGS! ADAM LUCAS SENDS ELITE AGAINST THE ROPES AND PLANTS HIM WITH A SPINEBUSTER!!! A BIG SPINEBUSTER FROM ADAM LUCAS! Chris Elite is in trouble!
Flannery McCoy: Now Adam Lucas sees his window of opportunity! Going for the sharpshooter once again! He’s nearly got it in, Chris Elite is fighting his way to the bottom rope! Elite now at the bottom rope, Adam Lucas is forced to release the hold, Chris Elite falls outside of the ring. Wait, Adam Lucas is going to fly! HE’S GOT AN AERIAL ATTACK ON HIS MIND! ADAM LUCAS OVER THE TOP ROPE WITH A SPRINGBOARD FLYING FOREARM! CHRIS ELITE CAUGHT HIM WITH AN UPPERCUT IN MID-AIR! ELITE TOOK OFF LUCAS’ JAW WITH A NASTY UPPERCUT RIGHT IN MID-AIR! WHAT A COUNTER FROM CHRIS ELITE! NOW CHRIS ELITE IS GOING TO BLITZ ADAM LUCAS, BRINGING ADAM TO HIS FEET…..PUNCH, ANOTHER PUNCH, KICK TO THE CALF, A BACKHAND, AND A LARIAT TO CAP IT OFF! WHAT A 5 BOROUGH COMBO FROM CHRIS ELITE!!!
Jake Mercer: Chris Elite with a magnificent counter and combination, displaying why exactly he’’s the dickeater killer! He also goes by ‘Gawd Given Greatness’ but we know him as the dickeater killer! Wait, he’s not done yet, still on the outside, he’’s placed Adam Lucas against the barricade, what has he got in mind now? WAIT, ELITE IS LOOKING FOR THE ‘HAWK EM”! HE WANTS TO DRIVE HIS KNEES INTO THE SKULL OF LUCAS, CHRIS ELITE RUNNING TOWARDS HIM!!! HAWK E- NO!!! CHRIS ELITE HITS THE BARRICADE HARD AS ADAM LUCAS SCURRIES OUT OF THE WAY! CHRIS ELITE’S KNEES DRIVEN INTO THAT BARRICADE AT FULL FORCE, AND ADAM LUCAS WITH A BASEMENT DROP KICK TO THE KNEE OF CHRIS ELITE, DROPPING HIM TO THE FLOOR!!
Stew-O: Adam Lucas picking apart the knee of Chris Elite, a brilliant strategy against this high-flying brash elitist! Both men back in the ring now, Chris Elite on a weak leg, Lucas goes for another enziguri! Chris Elite avoids it, and drops Adam Lucas with a pele kick! An amazing counter from the injured Chris! Trying to lift Adam Lucas up, but Lucas was playing possum! Slipping behind Chris and launching him halfway across the ring with a german suplex! What a move from Adam Lucas, planting Chris Elite with that car crash of a suplex! Up to his feet now, yelling out in a pure rush of adrenaline, Chris Elite certainly had venom in his tongue in the build up to this match, Adam Lucas wants to make him pay for it now!
Jake Mercer: Adam Lucas stomping on the knee of Chris, not allowing big Bhris up to his feet. Adam Lucas now heading to the top rope, he’s got another big move in mind! HE’S IN THE NO-FLY ZONE, HE’S GOING TO DROP FROM THE SKIES ONTO CHRIS ELITE!!!! Wait- Chris Elite rolling to the outside, escaping the imminent threat, BUT FOR HOW LONG!! ADAM LUCAS IS GOING TO FLY TO THE OUTSIDE NOW, SIZING UP CHRIS ELITE! BUT CHRIS GETS TO THE APRON AND STUNS ADAM LUCAS WITH AN ENZIGURI! NOW FOLLOWED UP BY A PELE KICK ON THE APRON!!! WOW!!! CHRIS ELITE SHOCKS LUCAS WITH A SERIES OF KICKS, ADAM IS ON THE TOP TURNBUCKLE STILL, HE’S OUT OF IT!
Flannery McCoy: Look at Chris Elite, man. So inspirational. HE’S ABOUT TO DELIVER ON HIS PROMISE TO DESTROY ADAM THIS WEEK, GOING TO THE TOP ROPE IS CHRIS, GOOD LORD!!! CHRIS ELITE IS SETTING UP ADAM LUCAS, OH NO, CHRIS DON’T!!!! ‘BROOOOKLYNNNNNNNN HIGHHHHHHHHH’ ALL THE WAY FROM THE TOP ROPE!! CHRIS ELITE RIPPED LUCAS DOWN FROM THE HEAVENS WITH A SPANISH FLY, BOTH MEN ARE DOWN! WHAT ATHLETICISM FROM AN ALREADY INJURED CHRIS ELITE! HE’S SOMEHOW FIGHTING THROUGH THE PAIN, NOT ONLY IS HE FIGHTING, HE’S DELIVERING SPANISH FLIES!
Stew-O: Both men beginning to stir, just barely. Though Chris Elite seems to have taken the lesser of the impact, dragging Lucas to the corner now. Elite’s exhausted…BUT HE MANAGES TO DELIVER THE ‘HAWK EM’!!! HE DELIVERS THE DOUBLE KNEES AFTER A PREVIOUSLY FAILED ATTEMPT, ADAM LUCAS DOESN’T KNOW WHERE HE IS! NOW CHRIS BACK UP TO THE TOP ROPE, HE’S ASCENDING THE TURNBUCKLES, ANOTHER AERIAL ASSAULT FROM CHRIS INCOMING! WAIT, HE’S LOOKING FOR THE ‘AIMIN FOR THE MOON’! THAT 630 SENTON THAT’S PUT AWAY SOME OF THE BEST THIS BRAND HAS TO OFFER! CHRIS ON THE TOP ROPE, WHAT THE HELL!?! ADAM BACK UP TO HIS FEET, HIP TOSSING CHRIS OFF THE TOP ROPE, INTO A CRADLE PILEDRIVER!!! HE CAUGHT HIM IN THE PILEDRIVER MID-TOSS, NOW PLANTING CHRIS ELITE ON HIS HEAD WITH A CRADDDLLLEEEE PILEEDRIIIVVERRRRR!!!! IF YOU THOUGHT LUCAS WAS DOWN AND OUT, THINK AGAIN!
Jake Mercer: ADAM LUCAS CRAWLING TOWARDS CHRIS, TRYING TO GET TO ELITE’S BODY! HE MANAGES TO THROW HIS ARM OVER CHRIS ELITE, GOING FOR THE PIN ON CHRIS!! THIS COULD BE IT!
Jake Mercer: KICKOUT! CHRIS ELITE MANAGED TO SHOOT HIS SHOULDER OFF THE CANVAS AT THE VERY LAST SECOND! But Adam Lucas will offer him zero time to recover, he wants to end this match right here and now! He’s signaling for the finish! SENDING CHRIS ELITE OFF THE ROPES, THE POP UP POW- NO, CHRIS ELITE, ‘OPEN YA MATA’ IN MID-AIR! THAT COUNTER KNEE STRIKE FROM CHRIS ELITE FOILS ADAM LUCAS’ PLANS, NOW CHRIS ELITE LIFTS ADAM LUCAS ON HIS SHOULDER, ‘44 BULLDOG’ INCOMING! WAIT, ADAM LUCAS ESCAPES OUT THE BACKDOOR, AND DROPS CHRIS WITH A DISCUS PUNCH! ADAM LUCAS NOW OFF THE ROPES, CHRIS ELITE COMES BACK WITH A ‘BOX OFFICE SMASH’ TO THE FACCEEEE OF LUCAS!!!!! CHRIS ELITE JUST SUPERKICKED LUCAS’ JAW INTO THE NOSEBLEEDS, AND HE’S GOING FOR THE COER NOW, CHRIS ELITE, FOR THE WIN!!
Stew-O: KICKOUTTTTT!! ADAM LUCAS KICKS OUT OF THE ‘BOX OFFICE SMASH’! CHRIS ELITE NEARLY TOOK THE WIN, BUT THIS MATCH ISN’T OVER YET! But Chris Elite has plans to change that! He’s signaling for a big move once more, p[oting towards the top rope! Chris is ‘Aimin’ For The Moon’! HE’S GONNA DO IT, ADAM LUCAS ISN’T MOVING, CHRIS ELITE IS ON THE TOP ROPE, UP TO HIS FEET NOW!!! BLOWS A KISS TO ADAM LUCAS, 63000000 SENTOOONNNNN- NO! NO, NO! ADAM LUCAS GOT HIS KNEES UP AT THE VERY LAST SECOND, HE JUST DROVE HIS KNEES INTO THE SPINE OF CHRIS ELITE, WHO’S YELLING IN PAIN! NOW ADAM LUCAS TO HIS FEET, GET’S CHRIS IN POSITION, SHARPSHOOTER!!!
Flannery McCoy: HE’S GOT THE SHARPSHOOTER IN! HE JUST DESTROYED CHRIS’S BACK AND NOW HE WANTS TO BEND HIS SPINE EVEN MORE! CHRIS IS SCREAMING IN PAIN, HE’S GOT NOWHERE TO GO! CHRIS HAS NO QUIT IN HIM, BUT THIS MIGHT NEED TO BE STOPPED FOR HIS SAKE!! CLAWING HIS WAY TO THE BOTTOM ROPE, HE’S ALMOST THERE! ADAM LUCAS DRAGS HIM BACK TO THE CENTER…AND IT’S IN AGAIN! THE SHARPSHOOTER IS BREAKING HIS BACK!
Jake Mercer: CHRIS ELITE STILL TRYING TO GET BACK TO THE BOTTOM ROPE, BUT HE’s ON AN ISLAND IN THE MIDDLE OF A SEA OF PAIN, HORRIBLE PAIN! CHRIS IS TRYING, DESPERATELY TRYING TO FIGHT HIS WAY TO THE ROPE! CHRIS IS ALMOST THERE….BUT LUCAS AGAIN, DRAGGING HIM TO THE CENTER! WAIT, BUT THIS TIME CHRIS ELITE PICKS THE ANKLE OF ADAM LUCAS, NOW CHRIS ELITE’S LOCKED IN ‘RANSOM’!!! THE ‘RANSOM’ IS LOCKED IN, THAT KOJI CLUTCH MANEUVER HAS ADAM LUCAS ON THE VERGE OF DEFEAT! CHRIS ELITE MANAGED TO TURN IT AROUND, ADAM LUCAS IS FIGHTING DESPERATELY TO GET OUT OF THIS!! ADAM LUCAS GETS TO THE BOTTOM ROPE! CHRIS ELITE QUICKLY GETS HIM ON HIS SHOULDER, HERE IT COMES! ‘44 BULLDOG’ LAWN DART!!!! THE FACE OF ADAM LUCAS DRIVEN INTO THE TURNBUCKLES!
Stew-O: Chris Elite possibly looking for the ‘Long Kiss Goodnight’! This would surely end it right here and now! CHRIS ELITE’S GOT HIM UP- BUT ADAM LUCAS WITH A KNEE TO THE SKULL! A KNEE TO CHRIS ELITE, WHO DROPS LUCAS BACK DOWN TO THE CANVAS! ADAM LUCAS LIFTS CHRIS ELITE INTO THE AIR AND DRIVES HIM DOWN WITH A VICIOUS SPINEBUSTER! HOLY HELL, CHRIS ELITE WAS JUST DEVASTATED BY THAT SPINEBUSTER! NOW ADAM LUCAS SENDS CHRIS ELITE AGAINST THE ROPES, POP UP POWERBOMB- NO, CHRIS ELITE MANAGED TO ROLL HIM UP!!! QUICK PACKAGE FROM MID-AIR BY CHRIS ELITE!!
Flannery McCoy: ADAM LUCAS KICKS OUT AT THE LAST SECOND! ADAM BACK TO HIS FEET, A STEP UP ENZIGURI ONCE AGAIN ROCKS CHRIS ELITE, CHRIS IS STUMBLING, ADAM’S GOT HIM SET UP! ADAM LUCAS SENDS CHRIS OFF THE ROPES, ADAM LUCAS PLANTS HIM WITH A POP-UP POWERBOMB! HE HIT IT, THIS IS IT! ADAM LUCAS INTO THE COVER OF CHRIS ELITE!
(DING! DING! DING!)
Flannery McCoy: WOW! ADAM LUCAS WITH A HUGGEEEE WIN OVER CHRIS ELITE ON DYNASTY, HERE TONIGHT! That makes singles wins over Chris Elite and The New Breed Champion in a matter of weeks! Adam Lucas has some huge momentum going into his Pure title match at Road To Redemption!
Stephie Love: HERE IS YOUR WINNER, ADAM ‘THE NEXT LEVEL’ LUCASSSSSS!!!
Stew-O: Adam Lucas with a big statement tonight, you have to imagine Dray Fontana and Limmy Monaghan are somewhere watching with keen interest. Either way you slice it, this was the most impressive Adam Lucas we’ve seen to date, his performance tonight was nothing short of brilliant.
Jake Mercer: Adam Lucas may very well be our next Pure Champion of the world. He’s proven all the doubters wrong and is only getting better. His future is brighter than bright, he’s going to be a star!
Flannery McCoy: What a match that was, Chris, don’t hang your head, both men left it all out in the ring tonight. But in the end, Adam Lucas walks away with the victory! Congratulations, Adam! Dynasty will return with more action momentarily!
(Adam Lucas is shown celebrating on the turnbuckles, while Chris Elite, shaking his head in anger as he mouths the words “FUCK” as walks up the stage as from there the shot fades to black.)
(A commercial for Xander Payne as he advertises new Gaming PCs and goes through his own computer but accidentally exposes that he has a folder named “xander payne hentai” as he abruptly shuts off the camera.)
(Dynasty comes back from commercial break as ‘Tougher Colder Killer’ by El-P plays up to boos as Lethal Consequences nonchalantly makes his way out to the stage in casual apparel. He looks around with a face of disdain as he makes his way down the ramp as he finds himself at the bottom of the ramp soon enough. He makes his way over to the apron as he rolls into the ring and goes over to the timekeeper’s area and sticks his head through the middle ropes, taking a mic as he makes his way to the center of the ring as ‘Tougher Colder Killer’ fades out and LC begins to speak)
Lethal Consequences: :dave:
(The crowd boos as LC stares straight into the camera, ignoring their negative reaction as he speaks)
Lethal Consequences: It’s been rough, a bumpy road. I find myself in a position where I’m forced to trudge through the mud, let me be the one to say if you didn’t get the clue that I don’t find myself wanting to be here. The constant struggle of getting out of bed in the morning and forcing myself here is not something that is looked over my head everytime I step into that four sided ring. I wasn’t in the mood for House of Glass when I faced Mr. Smith, I wasn’t in the mood at Dynasty when I faced Mr. Car, I’m just not. I don’t find myself holding a grudge against my opponents because I’m more or less holding a grudge against myself. For three years I’ve found myself at a constant struggle to accumulate some sort of success, it’s been rough, and it’s people think they can size with me? Don’t try to pity me.
(LC has a disgruntled look on his face as he paces around the ring as he continues to speak)
Lethal Consequences: Road To Redemption is my chance to get back on track when that fine line is drawn in the sand. The Visual Prophet mistook my anger for depression and that will cost him. Because all this anger? Like daggers piercing into my skin, will be taken out all on him. It’s time to redeem myself, I find myself still seething, absolutely seething, but I have to do this. Taking out each and every bit of my anger onto each and every person in that Chamber, it’s just common knowledge. I’d love to see the look on Viz’s face, the look of anguish, despair, when I hold the World Heavyweight Championship over his rotting corpse, all because he gave me a free pass, and that’s his fault. I’ll give him his own pain to feel, because they can’t understand mine. They call me the Inevitable for a reason because the inevitable is at Road To Redemption when I become World Heavyweight Champion-
(Before long ‘Don Life’ By Big Sean feat. Lil Wayne plays up to cheers as The Visual Prophet makes his way out to the stage before LC can finish his sentence. Viz chuckles as he makes his way down the ramp as ‘Don Life’ fades out and he holds a mic up as he looks at the World Heavyweight Championship around his shoulder before looking back to him as he speaks, before long getting into the ring)
Visual Prophet: Woo… I’m glad you know? Yes yes LC I’m excited, dare I say proud of you! I was able to breathe some new life into your old, senile ass body. I mean that’s just what the Big Bae does, ain’t it? It’s a shame though, after revitalizing you, giving you more life than your 60 year old body can handle and giving your future more light than your chrome top can shine off, that I have to break all of that right back down once I retain my World Heavyweight Championship and successfully, single handedly might I add, eliminate everybody in this weak ass chamber lineup, no filter needed pal. I mean who the hell can take me off my feet, I’m sky high baby, higher than Jordan, and damn sure higher than you. So if you wanna fuck with me be my guest, it ain’t gonna turn out sweet for you. And that’s on Bae-
(Before long another theme interrupts Viz’s sentence as ‘It Follows’ by Cane Hill plays up as Xander Payne makes his way out to the stage and quickly makes his way down the ramp. He enters into the ring and looks at the both of them with complete disgust as ‘It Follows’ fades out and he begins to speak)
Visual Prophet: Did you see a snacky snack in the ring-
Xander Payne: Be quiet be quiet be quiet… BE QUIET! I’m not here to amuse you and frankly I was tired of hearing all this shittalk which at the end of the day will never be true, it’s just beyond belief at this point. You want to say that you’re going to eliminate everyone in that Chamber Viz? Well it’s clear you forgot one person was in that match, and it’s me. Did I not just beat Chris Elite at House of Glass? All of 2020 I have driven my foot into the ground and shown exactly why it’s my breakout year, nothing less. What better way to cap it off? What better way to truly show who the hell I am by taking the World Heavyweight Championship, it ain’t all that farsighted.
(Before long ‘Black Honey’ by Thrice plays up as everyone in the ring gives a collective groan as MITSUBACHI and Komatsu Ogawa make their way out to the ring. They both make their way down to the ring with anger on their faces from the results they were given later in the night as Xander stares a hole into the both of them. Both of them enter into the ring as Ogawa snatches a mic and begins to speak as ‘Black Honey’ fades out)
Komatsu Ogawa: We aren’t done with you Xander. You think you can just beat me and go off without the repercussions? That’s not what a real samurai warrior would do, you think you’re so tough? I can assure you the results that you were given at Road To Redemption, they aren’t going to be the same, because last I checked you couldn’t beat BACHI two weeks ago, I’ll be shocked if that doesn’t stay the same at Road To Redemption, it just sticks.
Visual Prophet: Goddamn do y’all ever shut the fuck up? How many bitches bout to run down here and moan and groan about their problems, I ain’t here for that. I’m not here to whine about some stupid shit that everyone could care less about, I’m here to talk about how I’m able to kick everyone in this rings ass at the same time without breaking even a sweat, got a problem with that honeys?
Lethal Consequences: How stupid can you be? How stupid can any of you be actually? Interrupting my monologue for your own little bickering and banter that I can just bat my eyes to and it wouldn’t make a difference. Well it doesn’t matter anymore, since everyone of you are out here I guess you can hear this. That’s the fact that the cold anger that seeths through my body is the one that will drive me to victory. I wouldn’t be this confident otherwise. It’s stupid, pitiful, actually hypocritical, that I’m being looked at in some pity light. I’m going to find some personal satisfaction in this actually, when I wipe the smirks off your faces and beat the everlasting shit out of every single one of you. I’m the one ending the reign of The Visual Prophet, and it’s actually stupid to think that any of you are going to stop me. These last 2 seasons of fucking around are past me now, because I’m sick of it. If you want to see Lethal Consequences? Then you’re getting him, hell or high water.
Xander Payne: Man shut the fuck up, nobody cared to begin with. Thanks for glossing over me by the way, the best wrestler in this match by the way. Nobody has done what I’ve done, nobody has accomplished how much I’ve done, and at the end of the day, it’ll stay the same. That’s what sets me apart from the rest. I’m tired of people overlooking me, I think it’s stupid, i think it’s time to make sure that the name Xander Payne is embedded into stone, when I carve my own personal image into it. And that’s when I raise the World Heavyweight Championship above my head and finally complete that prophecy that I’ve been waiting to complete for near a year now.
MITSUBACHI: They look at me as the weak link, they look at MITSUBACHI? And they see someone that’s out first elimination, I think that’s tiring. It bores me to think that people really underestimate me that much? Nobody cares what ANY of you have to say, I think it’s time to focus on me for once. I beat Xander Payne last week and if that didn’t show anything? Then I don’t know what to say. At the end of the day as much as I hate to say it, I’m the wildcard, I’m the underdog, and nobody is going to stop me from pulling the heist of the century and winning at Road To Redemption-
(Viz sighs as he rubs his temple hearing everyone speak before…)
Stew-O: VIZ GRABBING MITSUBACHI AND SHOVING HIM INTO THE CROWD OF PEOPLE! FIST ARE BEING THROWN! WE HAVE A BRAWL ON OUR HANDS FOLKS! KOMATSU OGAWA! MITSUBACHI! LETHAL CONSEQUENCES! XANDER PAYNE! ALL OF THEM ARE NOT GIVING IN AS THIS FIST FIGHT IS NOT GOING TO END FOR A MINUTE!
(The Visual Prophet meanwhile rolls out of the ring and shakes his head as he laughs just watching everything go down as before long security quickly runs out to split them all up since nobody else was going to do so as Viz watches with a smirk as he raises the World Heavyweight Championship in the air for the crowd to see as they cheer in response as with all the carnage in the ring, the last shot seen is of the World Heavyweight Champion as Dynasty fades out to commercial break)
(A commercial advising what is and isn’t a promo in EAW. We don’t care if you’ve been alive before the stone age, don’t try to tell us what’s right and what’s wrong fucking bozo)
(The camera fades in to Stephie Love standing at the center of the ring with a smile on her face as she holds a mic up ready to speak)
Stephie Love: Ladies and gentlemen the following contest is a TAG TEAM MATCH! And it is scheduled for…
Crowd: ONE FALL!!!
(‘Collard Greens’ by Schoolboy Q ft. Kendrick Lamar plays up to loud cheers from the crowd as The Visual Prophet and Serena Bennett collectively make their way out to the stage. Viz gyrates his hips with a smirk on his face as the World Heavyweight Championship is on his waist. Meanwhile Serena shows off her jewelry and poses as she holds up the Universal Women’s Championship high in the air. Both of them look to one another with confident looks as they make their way down the ramp and headed to the ring)
Stephie Love: Introducing first… at a combined weight of 378 pounds… the team of THE WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION, THE VISUAL PROPHET!!!!!!!!!! AND THE UNIVERSAL WOMEN’S CHAMPION, SERENA BENNETT!!!!!!!! SHEA BUTTER BABIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Stew-O: As for the Shea Butter Babies they’re making progress throughout the Grand Prix tournament, getting through Team Wilson and now finding themselves as they move onand face whoever wins between The Liquid Swordz and The Mint Lads later in the night and of course if they win that, they’ll be in the finals at Road To Redemption.
Flannery McCoy: That’s why they gotta be looking to build their cred tonight, racking up wins and even if they already are a formidable force already, looking to solidify them to show that they’re going all the way. And while tonight isn’t a Grand Prix tournament match, it is definitely a way to do it.
Jake Mercer: I mean I know we all focus on Serena Bennett and her hips, but let’s admit, have we ever looked at Viz and his hips. 🤤
Flannery McCoy: Go back to your fake wrestling facts Gavin Kirkland.
Jake Mercer: What are you on about? Those facts are real might I add!
Stew-O & Flannery McCoy: :mjpls:
(Serena makes her way down the ramp as she climbs up onto the steel steps and poses on the apron as Viz slides into the ring and poses at the center of the ring behind her as Serena enters and meets up with Viz. Both of them raise their World Championships in their air as they look to one another once more and make their way over to their corner as they prepare in their corner as ‘Collard Greens’ fades out. Before long ‘King’s Dead’ by Kendrick Lamar, Jay Rock, Future & James Blake plays up to boos as the team of Limmy Monaghan and Mason Massacre make their way out to the ring. Both members of Goldheart look to one another as Limmy poses and Mason stands menacingly and shadow boxes at the stage before they both make their way down the ramp at the same time with cocky looks on their face)
Stephie Love: And their opponents… at a combined weight of 480 pounds…the team of LIMMY MONAGHAN!!!!!!!!! AND MASON MASSACRE!!!!!!!!! GOLDHEART!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Stew-O: As for Goldheart they find themselves in a good position too, beating Adam Lucas and Dray Fontana surely proving that they’re a team that shouldn’t be looked over in the long run, but what’s new?
Flannery McCoy: But now they move on to probably fight in the best opportunity they can get as a tag team. Fighting two World Champions on the Dyansty brand, imagine the victory they could get out of this? Imagine how major of a win this could be heading into their consecutive matches at Road To Redemption, it could give them a major boost. And I think they both have the same thoughts that I do and that’s the fact that they both have to win this match, it’s not an option anymore.
Jake Mercer: You know, I can only think of the combined weight of the both of them. So doing quick maths here, if they weigh 480 pounds, then how much does Limmy compare to Mason? Because this logic doesn’t make sense, by the looks of this! Limmy is 80 pounds! The blasphemy!
(Goldheart make their way around the ring before Mason makes his way up the steel steps as Limmy jumps up onto the apron. Both of them enter into the ring at the same time as they look around at the center of the ring before looking to their opponents, jokingly making a Championship gesture as they both make their way to the corner as they talk game plan as ‘King’s Dead’ fades out and the Ref goes to signal for the bell)
(DING! DING! DING!)
Stew-O: Here we go as this tag team match is underway! The Visual Prophet starting off for the Shea Butter Babies and Mason Massacre starting off for Goldheart! Both Mason and Viz are circling around the ring as both of them are looking to lock up, BUT MASON CONNECTS WITH A STIFF FOREARM TO THE FACE OF VIZ SENDING HIM DOWN TO A KNEE! Mason catching Vizzy by surprise as he grabs him and is not wasting any time lifting him off his feet and onto his shoulder, HE’S GOING FOR A SIT-OUT POWERBOMB!
Flannery McCoy: BUT VIZ FIGHTING OUT! Viz sending punches down to the head of Mason as he tries to keep him in the air but Viz is putting up a fight as Mason is forced to bring him down to the ground! Mason stumbling back but he’s taking a swing at him attempting to reel his arm back, AS HE GOES FOR ANOTHER FOREARM! BUT VIZ DUCKS UNDER AS MASON TURNS AROUND! AND VIZ TAKES HIM DOWN TO THE GROUND WITH A QUICK LARIAT TO HIS HEAD!
Jake Mercer: Mason is slowly beginning to get up as he’s back up to a knee, AS VIZ RUNS FORWARD AND ATTEMPTS A KNEE STRIKE TO THE SIDE OF HIS HEAD! BUT MASON PUSHES THE KNEE OUT OF THE WAY! Both of them are up to their feet now as Mason is getting up, AND SENDS A KICK TO THE GUT OF VIZ DOUBLING HIM OVER! Mason grabbing him by the head and turning him around, AS HE GOES FOR A NECKBREAKER! BUT VIZ TURNS HIMSELF AROUND AND PUSHES MASON AWAY! Mason stumbling forward as he leans himself to the left turning himself around, AS VIZ ATTEMPTS TO GO FOR A BACK ELBOW TOWARDS HIS FACE!
Stew-O: BUT MASON DUCKS UNDER AS HE SENDS A SIDE KICK TO THE KNEECAP OF VIZ SENDING HIM DOWN TO A KNEE! Viz trying to get up as Mason runs to the ropes and back, AS MASON LUNGES FORWARD AND TAKES VIZ DOWN WITH A SHOULDER TACKLE! Mason grabbing him by the arm and bringing him up to his feet as Viz is only forced to follow as he’s being pulled up! MASON TAKES HIM DOWN TO THE GROUND WITH A SHORT-ARM CLOTHESLINE!
Flannery McCoy: Mason keeping ahold of the arm of Viz as he sends him into an Irish whip to his corner as Limmy is waiting for the tag there!
Jake Mercer: AND IT’S LIMMY MONAGHAN THAT’S TAGGED INTO THE MATCH!
Stew-O: Mason grabbing Viz by the arm as he sends him into another Irish whip as Limmy runs forward, AND GOES FOR A KNEE TOWARDS HIS GUT! BUT VIZ MANAGES TO MOVE OUT OF THE WAY AND STEP BEHIND HIM AS HE GRABS LIMMY, AND SENDS HIM LAUNCHING UPWARDS WITH A GERMAN SUPLEX!
Flannery McCoy: Limmy taken down to the ground as he falls to a sitting position, AS VIZ LOOKS TO RUN FORWARD AND SEND A BOOT TO HIS FACE! BUT LIMMY GRABBING THE LEG OF VIZ AND TURNING IT AWAY ALLOWING HIM TO GET UP TO HIS FEET! Limmy is up as he’s running forward behind Viz, AND GRABS HIM BY THE HEAD AS HE TAKES HIM DOWN INTO A RUNNING BULLDOG!
Jake Mercer: Limmy quickly getting up as he lifts his leg in the air, AND DROPS IT DOWN ONTO THE HEAD OF VIZ WITH A JUMPING KNEE DROP! BUT NO! VIZ MANAGES TO GET OUT OF THE WAY AS HE ROLLS ONTO A CRAWLING POSITION! LIMMY RUNNING FORWARD AND GOING FOR A PUNT KICK TOWARDS HIS FACE, BUT VIZ RUNS TOWARDS HIM AND ROLLS HIM INTO A SCHOOLBOY PIN!
Stew-O: LIMMY KICKS OUT! But Viz keeping ahold of him as he lifts him into the air from the Schoolboy position! AND SENDS HIM BACK DOWN TO THE CANVAS WITH A ONE ARM POWERBOMB! Limmy bouncing off the ground as he’s retreating out of the ring! Limmy back up to his feet trying to recover as he’s grabbing ahold of the apron and trying to use it as a crutch of sorts to try to keep himself upwards as he looks to roll into the ring, BUT WAIT! VIZ IS ON THE TOP ROPE! AIR VIZZY! HE PROPELS HIMSELF OFF AND LOOKS TO TAKE HIM DOWN WITH A CROSSBODY!
Flannery McCoy: NOBODY HOME! LIMMY MANAGES TO BARELY MOVE OUT OF THE WAY AS VIZ MEETS NOTHING BUT AIR AND DROPS DOWN ONTO THE CONCRETE FLOOR AT RINGSIDE! Viz is down on the ground as Limmy is already bringing him up to his feet and rolling him into the ring as he rolls in as well! Viz is up on a knee as he’s trying to recover in a whole lot of pain missing the top-rope Crossbody to the outside, BUT LIMMY IS RUNNING FORWARD AS HE CONNECTS WITH A KNEE STRIKE TO HIS HEAD SENDING HIM BACK DOWN TO THE GROUND!
Jake Mercer: Limmy already sliding down to the ground, AS HE TRANSITIONS AND BEGINS TO SEND QUICK PUNCHES TOWARDS THE HEAD OF VIZ AS HE’S JUST TEEING OFF WITH RAPID FIRE FISTS TO HIS HEAD! Viz managing to manuever his arms around as he grabs Limmy by the face and shoves him away as both of them are back up to their feet now, LIMMY RUNS TOWARDS HIM! BUT VIZ SIDE STEPS AS HE THROWS LIMMY TOWARDS THE CORNER! BUT LIMMY USING THAT MOMENTUM AS HE KICKS OFF THE THE TURNBUCKLES AND FLIES INTO THE AIR LOOKING TO TAKE HIM DOWN WITH A CROSSBODY!
Stew-O: BUT VIZ CATCHES HIM WITH A SPINEBUSTER TAKING HIM DOWN TO THE GROUND! LIMMY IS DOWN AS VIZ HOOKS THE LEG AND GOES FOR THE PIN ATTEMPT ON LIMMY!
Flannery McCoy: BUT LIMMY KICKS OUT OF THE PIN ATTEMPT!
Jake Mercer: Viz grabbing onto the ropes and using them to pull himself up to his feet as he’s making his way to his corner. Limmy is seeing this as he’s trying to quickly get up and lunge towards him because if Viz manages to tag in this won’t be good for Limmy, LIMMY GRABBING VIZ AND TURNING HIM AROUND! BUT VIZ MANAGES TO PULL HIM IN AND SEND A KNEE STRIKE TO HIS GUT SENDING HIM DOWN TO THE GROUND! VIZ TURNING AROUND AND HOLDING HIS HAND OUT!
Stew-O: AND TAG INTO SERENA BENNETT! Serena climbing up to the top rope as Limmy manages to get up to his feet, AS SHE LAUNCHES OFF AND TAKES HIM BACK DOWN TO THE GROUND WITH A TOP ROPE METEORA! Limmy is taken down to the ground as he sits up in pain, AS SERENA TURNS AROUND AND SENDS A KICK TO THE BACK OF HIS HEAD TAKING HIM DOWN TO THE GROUND!
Flannery McCoy: Limmy attempting to get up to his feet before Serena can do anything else, BUT SHE GRABS HIS ARM AND TAKES HIM DOWN TO THE GROUND WITH A QUICK ARMDRAG! Serena keeps a hold of the arm, BUT LIMMY QUICKLY GRABS SERENA BY THE HEAD AND TAKES HER DOWN INTO AN INSIDE CRADLE AS HE PUSHES HER AWAY QUICKLY ALLOWING HIMSELF TO GET BACK UP TO HIS FEET! Serena turning around as she’s trying to focus her attention back on Limmy, BUT IT’S LIMMY THAT RUNS FORWARD AND TAKES SERENA DOWN TO THE GROUND WITH A QUICK SLINGBLADE TO COUNTER ANY SORT OF OFFENSE THAT SHE HAD!
Jake Mercer: Limmy slamming the mat as he’s back up to his feet and running over, AS HE LANDS ON SERENA WITH A STANDING SHOOTING STAR PRESS! LIMMY TRANSITIONING SMOOTHLY AS HE HOOKS THE LEG AND GOES FOR A PIN!
Stew-O: BUT SERENA KICKS OUT BEFORE THREE!
Flannery McCoy: Limmy back up to his feet as he grabs the head of Serena, BUT SERENA GRABS THE HEAD OF LIMMY IN RETURN AS SHE CONNECTS WITH A EUROPEAN UPPERCUT TO HIS JAW FORCING HIM BACK! She runs forward as Limmy is against the ropes, AS SHE SENDS HIM OVER THE TOP ROPE WITH A CLOTHESLINE! Limmy landing on the apron just barely as she tries to keep herself upright, BUT SERENA GRABS THE ROPES AND CONNECTS WITH A ROPE-ASSISTED ENZUIGIRI SENDING LIMMY OUT OF THE RING AND TO THE RINGSIDE AREA! Serena running to the ropes now as Limmy is grabbing the barricade and trying to recover, AS SHE GOES THROUGH AND GOES FOR A SUICIDE DIVE!
Jake Mercer: BUT LIMMY MOVES OUT OF THE WAY AS HE DIRECTS HER AND SLAMS SERENA BENNETT INTO THE BARRICADE!
Stew-O: Serena crumbling down to the ground in pain as Limmy is rolling her back into the ring, he’s jumping up onto the apron and climbing up to the top rope as he’s bracing himself to fly! AS LIMMY LAUNCHES OFF THE TOP ROPE AND CONNECTS WITH A KNEE TO THE BRIDGE OF SERENA’S NOSE TAKING HER DOWN TO THE GROUND AS HE ROLLS UP TO HIS FEET!
Flannery McCoy: Limmy grabbing Serena by the head now, AS HE THROWS HER TOWARDS HIS CORNER! Serena is backed up as Limmy runs to her now, AND NEARLY TAKES HER HEAD OFF WITH A RUNNING BIG BOOT TO HER FACE! Limmy sees the opportunity as he sends her into another Irish whip and begins to make his way to Mason Massacre as I think he’s going for a tag!
Jake Mercer: AND IT’S MASON MASSACRE THAT’S TAGGED IN! Mason enters into the ring as Limmy holds up Serena and Mason runs to the ropes, AS MASON CONNECTS WITH A BICYCLE BIG BOOT TO HER JAW AS LIMMY DROPS HER AND LEAVES SERENA DOWN ON THE GROUND!
Stew-O: Mason taking his time as he’s grabbing Serena by the head and bringing her back up to her feet as he sets her up, AS HE QUICKLY TAKES HER BACK DOWN TO THE GROUND WITH A SWIFT SLEEPER SUPLEX! Mason taking a more methodical pace as he gets tagged in as he brings Serena back up to her feet, AS HE CONNECTS WITH A STIFF FOREARM TO HER FACE! Serena sent down to a knee as Mason makes his way towards her, BUT SERENA WITH A PUNCH TO HIS GUT FORCING MASON BACK! Serena creating some time for herself as Mason turns his attention back to her and making his way back, BUT SERENA GETS UP AS SHE CONNECTS WITH A QUICK HEADBUTT TO THE HEAD OF MASON SENDING HIM DOWN TO A KNEE! Mason attempting to get up to his feet but resorts to falling to the corner, BUT SERENA RUNS FORWARD AS SHE JUMPS UP AND LAUNCHES MASON UP IN THE AIR, TAKING HIM DOWN WITH SURPRISING STRENGTH AS SHE CONNECTS WITH A MONKEY FLIP!
Flannery McCoy: Mason grabbing his back as he tries to stumble back up to his feet and recover, BUT SERENA RUNS FORWARD AS HE’S ON A KNEE AND CONNECTS WITH A DROPKICK TO HIS HEAD TAKING HIM DOWN TO THE CANVAS! Mason trying to sit up, BUT SERENA TRANSITIONS AS SHE SENDS A KICK TO HIS HEAD! BUT NO! MASON GRABS THE FOOT! Mason slowly getting back up to his feet managing to keep a hold of her leg, AS HE TAKES HER DOWN WITH A DRAGON SCREW!
Jake Mercer: AND TRANSITIONS INTO AN ANKLE LOCK!
Stew-O: MASON LOCKING IN AN ANKLE LOCK AS HE RAISES SERENA’S LEG HIGH IN THE AIR AS HE DOES SO! SERENA SCREAMING IN PAIN AS SHE ATTEMPTS TO CRAWL TO THE ROPES TO ESCAPE! MASON IS IN FULL CONTROL AS HE WRENCHES AT HER LEG TRYING TO GET HER TO TAP OUT TO THE SUBMISSION HOLD! SERENA IS CLAWING AT THE CANVAS AS SHE’S SO CLOSE TO REACHING THEM BUT MASON ISN’T LETTING UP! SERENA IS FINGERTIPS AWAY AT THIS POINT!
Flannery McCoy: BUT MASON PULLS HER BACK!
Jake Mercer: WHICH ALLOWS SERENA TO TURN ONTO HER BACK AND SEND KICKS TOWARDS HIS FACE! SERENA SENDING MULTIPLE KICKS TO THE FACE OF MASON MASSACRE AS HE STILL HAS A HOLD OF HER LEG AS SERENA IS TRYING TO MAKE SURE THAT HE LETS GO FOR GOOD! AND HE DOES! MASON STUMBLES BACK AS HE LET’S GO OF SERENA’S LEG!
Stew-O: Serena is getting up as Mason turns towards him, AS SERENA LAUNCHES HERSELF TOWARDS HIM AND TAKES HIM DOWN WITH A BIG CROSSBODY SENDING HIM DOWN TO THE GROUND! SERENA SENDING PUNCHES DOWN TO MASON AS SHE GETS BACK UP TO HER FEET AND RUNS TO THE ROPES AND BACK BEFORE RUNNING TOWARDS HIM, AS SHE CONNECTS WITH A BASEBALL SLIDE SENDING HIM OUT OF THE RING! SERENA RUNNING TO THE ROPES!
Flannery McCoy: BUT MASON GRABS SERENA BY THE LEGS BEFORE SHE CAN DO SO AS HE PULLS HER OUT OF THE RING! Mason grabbing Serena by the head, AS HE SLAMS HER FACE DOWN ONTO THE EDGE OF THE RING APRON! Mason isn’t done as he keeps Serena up and begins to make his way around the ring, AS HE THROWS HER TOWARDS THE RINGPOST!
Jake Mercer: AND SERENA FALLS TO THE GROUND AS THE REF BEGINS THE COUNT! Serena trying to crawl but Mason is already on the pursuit as he’s grabbing Serena by the head, AND SLAMMING HER FACEFIRST ONTO OUR ANNOUNCERS BOOTH! Mason not letting up one bit as he grabs Serena by the head again, AND LOOKS TO SLAM HER BACK INTO THE ANNOUNCERS DESK FOR GOOD MEASURE!
Stew-O: BUT SERENA HOLDS HER HANDS OUT BEFORE IMPACT AS SHE SLAMS AN ELBOW INTO HIS GUT FORCING HIM BACKWARDS!
Flannery McCoy: Mason now moving back as he tries to move forward and take a running start! BUT WAIT! SERENA GOING FOR CAPTAIN HOOK! BUT MASON SLIPS OUT OF THE WAY AND USES HIS LEG TO SWEEP UNDER HER! BUT SERENA DUCKS UNDER AS SHE ROLLS INTO THE RING! Mason trying to follow as he rolls back in as well as the count ceases!
Jake Mercer: MOONLIGHT! RUNNING NECKBREAKER TAKES MASON DOWN TO THE GROUND! SERENA HOOKING THE LEG AND GOING FOR THE PIN ATTEMPT ON MASON MASSACRE!
Stew-O: LIMMY MONAGHAN LEAPS OFF THE TOP ROPE WITH A DIVING KNEE DROP TO THE BACK OF SERENA BENNETT BREAKING UP THE PIN! Serena retreating away as Limmy is helping Mason up but quickly rolls out of the ring as The Visual Prophet is looking to move as well. Serena grabbing onto the ropes as Mason is back up to his feet, AS MASON GOES FOR A RUNNING KNEE STRIKE!
Flannery McCoy: WHICH CONNECTS ACROSS THE JAW OF SERENA AS MASON GRABS HER BY THE ARM AND SENDS HER INTO AN IRISH WHIP TOWARDS THE CORNER AS HE RUNS TOWARDS IT! AND CONNECTS WITH A EUROPEAN UPPERCUT!
Jake Mercer: BUT SERENA MOVES OUT OF THE WAY AS SHE GRABS MASON BY THE ARM AND SENDS A KNEE TO HIS GUT! Mason sent down to a knee as Serena grabs him and sends him into an Irish whip, AS SHE PULLS HER INTO THE CAPTAIN HOOK UPPERCUT!
Stew-O: BUT MASON DUCKS UNDER! BUT THAT DOESN’T STOP SERENA AS SHE SHOVES MASON INTO THE CORNER AND RUNS FORWARD!
Flannery McCoy: AND TAGS IN THE VISUAL PROPHET! Serena grabbing Mason, BUT MASON WITH A BIG FOREARM TAKING HER DOWN TO THE GROUND AS SHE RETREATS OUT OF THE RING! AS VIZ ENTERS IN AND SENDS A STIFF ELBOW TO THE SIDE OF HIS FACE! Viz grabbing Mason and pushing him down to the center of the ring as he climbs up to the top rope as Mason turns around, AS VIZ LAUNCHES OFF AND TAKES HIM DOWN TO THE GROUND WITH A AXE HANDLE!
Jake Mercer: BUT MASON DUCKS UNDER AS HE SENDS A PUNCH TOWARDS THE GUT OF VIZ TAKING HIM DOWN TO A KNEE! Mason shoving Viz down to the ground as he runs to the ropes and back, AS MASON LEAPS UP AND GOES FOR A RUNNING SENTON! BUT VIZ MOVES OUT OF THE WAY AS HE RUNS TO THE ROPES AND GOES FOR A RUNNING LEG DROP!
Stew-O: BUT MASON MOVES OUT OF THE WAY AS VIZ SITS UP IN PAIN, AS MASON CRACKS A KNEE ACROSS HIS FACE! Mason connecting with the knee as he runs to the ropes and back, AS THIS TIME HE CONNECTS WITH THE RUNNING SENTON! SECOND TIMES A CHARM! Mason back up to his feet as he grabs Viz by the arm and sends him into an Irish whip to the ropes and back, AS HE RUNS FORWARD AND CONNECTS WITH A RUNNING BACK ELBOW TO TAKE HIM DOWN TO THE GROUND!
Flannery McCoy: Mason taking the time to catch his breath as he makes his way towards Viz once more, AS HE SLAMS A BOOT INTO HIS GUT! Mason driving his foot into his gut as he continues to keep it down as Viz tries to pry it off of him, AS MASON LIFTS IT UP AND DRIVES IT BACK DOWN ONTO HIS GUT FOR GOOD MEASURE AS HE MOVES AWAY! Mason with a smirk on his face is strutting over to his corner as he seems very confident as Limmy is mirroring the same look on his face as he’s holding out his hand.
Jake Mercer: AND TAG IN TO LIMMY MONAGHAN! Limmy entering into the ring as Viz is slowly crawling up to his feet as Limmy is making his way towards him, BUT VIZ SENDS A ELBOW TOWARDS HIS GUT WHICH SENDS LIMMY DOWN TO A KNEE! This allowing Viz to get back up to his feet as Limmy recovers, BUT VIZ GRABS HIM BY THE HAIR AND SLAMS HIM DOWN TO THE GROUND! Limmy sitting up as Viz turns around, AND LOOKS TO SEND A KICK TOWARDS HIS BACK!
Stew-O: BUT LIMMY MANAGES TO MOVE OUT OF THE WAY AS HE GRABS VIZ FROM BEHIND AND GOES FOR A GERMAN SUPLEX TO LAUNCH HIM OFF OF THE GROUND!
Flannery McCoy: WHAT?! VIZ LANDS ON HIS FEET AS BOTH OF THEM RUN TOWARDS EACH OTHER! AND BOTH CONNECT WITH DOUBLE CLOTHESLINES TAKING BOTH OF THEM DOWN TO THE GROUND!
Jake Mercer: The crowd is having a heart attack as both of them are getting back up to their feet now, AS VIZ BOOSTS UP TO HIS FEET AND ATTEMPTS A CLOTHESLINE! BUT LIMMY DUCKS UNDER! HE STEPS BACK AS THE WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION TURNS ON HIS HEELS!
Stew-O: ARMOR BREAKER! SUPERKICK OUT OF NOWHERE TO THE JAW OF VIZZY AS LIMMY FALLS DOWN TO THE GROUND AS HE HOOKS THE LEG!
Flannery McCoy: VIZ BREAKS OUT OF THE PIN!
Jake Mercer: Limmy standing up in anger as he’s grabbing Viz and throwing him towards his corner as he makes his way forward, I think he’s looking to finish this by getting the tag in to Mason!
Stew-O: AND MASON IS TAGGED IN! It seems that Goldheart is ready to finish this as Mason is lifting Viz up to an Electric Chair position and lifting him up as Limmy is climbing up to the top rope and preparing himself, AS HE LEAPS OFF! HE’S GOING FOR THE MUSHROOM STOMP! #RIPBOZO!
Flannery McCoy: WAIT! SERENA! SERENA GRABBING VIZ AND PULLING HIM OFF THE SHOULDERS OF MASON AS MASON STUMBLES BACK! AND LIMMY ACCIDENTLY LANDS THE MUSHROOM STOMP ON MASON TAKING HIM DOWN TO THE GROUND! Limmy is confused as he doesn’t know what just happened, BUT SERENA RUNS FORWARD AND TACKLES LIMMY OUT OF THE RING SENDING BOTH OF THEM TUMBLING DOWN TO THE GROUND!
Jake Mercer: Mason is down on the ground as Viz sees the opportunity, he’s climbing up to the top rope and prepping as he stands! HE LEAPS OFF!
Stew-O: BOW TO THE HEART! DIVING ELBOW DROP TO THE CHEST OF MASON MASSACRE AS VIZ HOOKS THE LEG AND GOES FOR THE PIN!
(DING! DING! DING!)
(‘Collard Greens’ plays up to cheers as The Visual Prophet gets up to his feet with a smirk on his face as he dusts his hands and looks down at Mason Massacre. Serena Bennett slowly rolls into the ring as Viz helps her up as the Ref hands them both their significant titles as they raise each others hands and hold them high in the air as they begin to celebrate around the ring)
Stephie Love: Ladies and gentlemen here are your winners, the team of the WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION THE VISUAL PROPHET AND THE UNIVERSAL WOMEN’S CHAMPION SERENA BENNETT… SHEA BUTTER BABIES!!!!!!!!!!!
Stew-O: What a match that we’ve just seen tonight. Both teams gave it their all knowing the stakes at hand for the both of them. Goldheart knew they were at a significant disadvantage but that didn’t stop them from going through all the hoops to make sure that they pulled off the shock win against two World Champions and imagine what that could’ve done for their career?
Flannery McCoy: Of course but at the end of the day Shea Butter Babies after a hard fought battle just narrowly escaped this match with the victory, that’s why we gotta congratulate them for their victory tonight, and could this be a scene that we could see at Road to Redemption?
Jake Mercer: But it looks like the Coconut Oil Babies are not done yet as they have some unwelcome guests.
(Both members of the Shea Butter Babies turn to the stage as suddenly, MITSUBACHI and Komatsu Ogawa are seen making their way down the ramp, still in ring attire but having smirks on their faces as they do so. Serena looks at Viz as Viz looks at Serena as both of them look in confusion at the abrupt arrival of the tag team as they enter into the ring. Both of them look at one another before…)
Stew-O: OGAWA JUST SPIT RED MIST INTO THE FACE OF THE WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION!
Flannery McCoy: SERENA SEES THIS AS SHE LUNGES FORWARD AND GOES FOR THE TEAM OF TWO! BUT THEY SLIDE OUT OF THE RING BEFORE SHE CAN DO ANYTHING!
(Serena ignores the two of them as she makes her way over to tend to Viz as she looks to help Viz up to his feet)
Jake Mercer: TWIST OF FURY!
Stew-O: IT’S MS. EXTREME! SHE CONNECTS WITH THE SPINNING NECKBREAKER TAKING SERENA BENNETT DOWN TO THE GROUND! Ms. Extreme looks with fiery intention in her eyes down at her Road To Redemption opponent as now she’s making her way up to the top rope and positions herself as she looks to fly!
Flannery McCoy: A BLIND FURY!
(The Diving Double Foot Stomp connects onto the chest of Serena Bennett completely taking the air out of her as Ms. Extreme is already back up to her feet as she looks up to the crowd with a smirk on her face. She exaggeratingly dusts her shoulders before dropping down and rolling out of the ring as she makes her way up the ramp and past Ogawa and MITSU with a smirk on her face as the last shot is the downed bodies of the Shea Butter Babies as the camera fades out and Dynasty goes to commercial break)
(A commercial for a reboot of F.R.I.E.N.D.S. starring The Mint Lads, Jamie O’Hara & Ahren Fournier)
(Dynasty comes back from commercial break as it fades in to see Molly Waters sitting on a chair in the designated interview area with a grin on her face as she begins to speak looking towards the camera)
Molly Waters: Last week on Dynasty we saw the long awaited return of one of the most polarizing names in EAW history as Dynasty’s biggest acquisition of SZN 14; and right now I’d like to invite him over to have a little chat.. Ladies and Gentleman.. Vic Vendetta.
(Vic Vendetta walks into frame, and you can hear the loud cheers from the arena booming through the walls of the interview area backstage as he takes a seat across from Molly)
Molly Waters: Vic it’s been a long time since the EAW faithful has seen you on a weekly episodic show in EAW, and I gotta know. How did it feel?
(A smile comes across the face of Vic Vendetta before collecting his thoughts enough to talk)
Vic Vendetta: Well I tried to soak it all in you know? The words are indescribable. You go through it in your mind over and over again before it actually happens. You think of what to expect, and try to run through all the scenarios, it’s nerve racking really. But it’s just one of those things that you can’t anticipate, being in an EAW ring again it’s just… It’s really a dream come true honestly. I’m glad everyone remembered who I was; and gave me such a warm reception.. But that was just the beginning, and that feeling of cloud 9 can only last for so long. Now is the time that I get to work, and show that I still have it.
Molly Waters: Speaking of.. When do you think you’ll get back into competing in that ring?
Vic Vendetta: Wellll.. I’m real antsy to just jump right in honestly, I’ve waited years to get to this point right now, but I’m going to be smart about it. My heart says go out there tonight, but my head says… Wait for something big. I’m excited to get back in the ring and prove that I still have IT… and what better place to do just that than at Road To Redemption. I believe that is the day, that this dream becomes reality. Road To Redemption is one of the biggest FPV’s of the year, and there’s just something about that FPV that really has always stood out. I don’t know if it’s because of the holiday spirit that’s in the air, or the fact it’s the end of the year, and we’re just at the cusp of new beginnings… But it just feels right.
Molly Waters: Have any matches in mind?
(Vic turns to face the camera directly head on)
Vic Vendetta: The World Heavyweight Championship….
(The crowd responds with loud cheers once more as he shakes his head and gives off a smile and turns back to Molly)
Vic Vendetta: Nah I’m just playing. I know I have to work my way back to that level; but honestly anything that gives me a good fight, a challenge. I know that EAW has changed a lot since the last time I’ve been here, and I know there’s a lot of guys I’d like to have the opportunity to get in the ring with.. But as for someone in particular? Eh… Not really.
(Molly sees who’s coming and scurries away)
Jake Smith: No one in mind huh? Well just who the hell put you in charge? What makes you think you would even GET the choice of choosing your opponent.
(Vic sighs and turns around to face Jake Smith as he walks into frame and as Molly retreats away, he instead takes her seat and looks towards him)
Vic Vendetta: Oh hey Jake, I should’ve known you were lurking around from the slime trail that was on the ground..
Jake Smith: Huh?
Vic Vendetta: Your hair.. It’s greasy… Anyway it doesn’t matter.. What are you doing here? Are you trying to sneak attack me again? Because I get massive little dick energy from you not gonna lie. Always the first to open his mouth and try to prove something, when in reality he’s just not as good as his mouth makes him out to be. How did Reasonable Doubt go by the way? Not well huh? Because I don’t see that World Championship you were talking about around your waist.. Huh it’s… It’s not over your shoulder either. Weird, you said you were going to win the World Championship… Did… Did that not happen? After all that shit you were talking, you really painted yourself into a corner huh? But that seems to be the common theme with you, isn’t it Jake?
(A scowl comes across Jakes face which completely changes his tone from the grin he had as he entered into the scene)
Jake Smith: Funny.. Yeah you’re real funny, real class act. It’s not my fault that I was distracted by the two bimbos in the match.. But that doesn’t even matter because I’m more confident in my ability to ruin the failed return of yet another veteran. Let’s stick to the topic at hand Victor, You’re no World Champion anymore, you can hold onto that claim real tight like you’re the same person from an alternative life. It might as well be because when you won that title, it might as well have been a whole life time ago. EAW has had enough failed veteran runs ok? We don’t need another old man trying to relive his glory days. I will not be a stepping stone for your narrative. Isn’t that sad.. I would be your stepping stone, you mean nothing to me. I don’t know how much you’ve paid attention to EAW, but vets haven’t been having a good time around here.. Can’t seem to keep up with the new generation, especially when they come into my path. Ask Jacob Senn if you can even find him. Last I heard he was in some second rate reject company filled to the brim with EAW’s trash. You can join him, I’m sure they’re taking applications, and you fit the mold. Semi successful run in EAW.. Utter shit now.. Yeah you’ll do just fine over there; and I can help you get there…
(Jake stands up and moves closer to Vic as Vic stands up as well to level with him)
Jake Smith: Honestly.. You should’ve just returned to one of those places with the rest of your peers, and most likely friends, let’s be real. You just don’t belong here anymore. There’s no place in EAW for failed overrated bums like you. You are from a weak disgraceful time in EAW, and that was your prime, that was where you flourished. Unfortunately for you, EAW has moved past the dark ages, and is in a Golden Era… A Jake Smith Era.. And as this is the Jake Smith Show.. I think it’s only fair that I get to tell you.. Your services are no longer required.. You bum.
(Vic takes a step to Jake)
Vic Vendetta: You know what? You got your match…
(Vic walks past Jake shoulder bumping him in the process. Jake looks back at Vic with a smile on his face as that’s the last shot seen as the camera fades to black)
(Another commercial for Health Care starring the members of the Armageddon Hell In A Cell match, maybe none of the brands are safe from this; we’ve had 3 commercials for all 3 Free-Per-Views concerning the health of the Elitists around here :lupe:)
(‘We Major’ by Kanye West and Nas hits, as the virtual crowd in the arena erupts into boos. The team of Impact and Mr. DEDEDE step out onto the stage as they look extremely focused. The two continue to make their way down to the ring.)
Stephie Love: The following contest is set for… ONE FALL!!! And it is a Grand Prix Quarterfinal Match!! Introducing first, they are the team of Impact and Mr. DEDEDE… LIQUID SWORDZ!!!!
Stew-O: The Liquid Swordz have been on an absolute tear this season so far and are only continuing that trend here in the Grand Prix. They defeated PRIDE & HONOR in the first round, but can make some major noise with a victory of Mint Lads tonight.
Jake Mercer: The Wet Daggers truly are a treat to watch. From their performance in the War Games match to the Grand Prix, these two are seemingly unstoppable.
Flannery McCoy: Wet Daggers?
Jake Mercer: They haven’t earned the name Liquid Swordz from me yet.
Flannery McCoy: You just said they are seemingly unstoppable?
Jake Mercer: Seemingly Flannery. I never said they were definitely unstoppable..
Flannery McCoy: :russwtf:
(‘My Best Friend’ by Weezer hits, as Ahren Fournier and Jamie O’Hara step out onto the stage. Jamie has his Answers World Championship wrapped around his waist as he looks to add more gold to his resume by winning this Grand Prix and defeating the reigning champions with Ahren. The two continue down to the ring)
Stephie Love: And their opponents.. The team of Ahren Fournier and Answers World Champion, Jamie O’Hara.. MINT LADS!!!!!
Stew-O: Here are Mint Lads. These two had a pretty impressive first round match and earned their way into the second round. The question now is whether Jamie O’Hara is fully capable of competing after enduring the grueling Armageddon Hell in a Cell Match less than a week ago.
Flannery McCoy: I think he’ll fare pretty well. He is the Ace after all, and we know how big this match is for him seeing how he’s facing two familiar foes in Impact and Mr. DEDEDE. Plus with Ahren by his side, the two have great chemistry.. I wouldn’t doubt Mint Lads for one second, because they are just as dangerous of a duo as Liquid Swordz are.
(DING! DING! DING!)
Stew-O: Here we go! Mint Lads vs Liquid Swords in this Grand Prix Quarterfinals is underway! Impact starts it off for the swords while Ahren Fournier starts off the match for the Mint Lads. Both lock up in the center of the ring as Impact quickly transitions into a standing side headlock onto Ahren! Impact squeezes tightly, but Ahren manages to shove him off and towards the ring ropes! Impact hits the ropes and bounces back! RIGHT JAB BY AHREN! No! Impact manages to avoid that jab by ducking under the arm! Ahren quickly turns around, but is hit with a chop to the chest! Another shot by Impact! He goes for a third, but his arm gets caught by Ahren! Ahren keeps a hold of Impact’s arm with his left hand then drops his elbow down onto it with his right! His elbow just pierced into Impact’s arm as it forces the former world champ to stumble forward on his feet!
Flannery McCoy: BACK ELBOW TO THE SIDE OF THE FACE BY AHREN!! That shot pops Impact back as Impact clutches at his jaw in pain, but that leaves enough room for Ahren to connect with a jab to the abdomen! Another! And another! Impact now clutches at his abdomen, but Ahren switches back with a forearm to the face of Impact! He then follows that up with a right hook to the face that forces Impact to stumble back towards a neutral corner where he leans up against the turnbuckles!!
Jake Mercer: That hard hitting combination of strikes by Ahren really showcase the brawler inside of him. If the Mint Lads win tonight, I have to treat them to a night at the bar in hopes of witnessing a bar fight with Ahren in it.
Flannery McCoy: :dahell:
Stew-O: Impact is back up against the corner as Ahren makes his way over to him. KNEE STRIKE TO THE ABDOMEN!! Another one by Ahren, as he backs out of the corner. Impact slowly steps out as well towards Fournier, but is kicked directly in the abdomen! Ahren reaches his arm around Impacts head.. SNAP SUPLEX!!!
Flannery McCoy: NO!! Impact is leaning back and putting pressure on Ahren’s thigh to prevent The GOAT from lifting him up in the air… AND IMPACT REVERSES IT WITH A SNAP SUPLEX OF HIS OWN!! Ahren hits the canvas hard, but quickly pops up to his feet! Impact is already up to his own, as Ahren charges at him!! SPINNING WHEEL KICK RIGHT ACROSS THE FACE OF AHREN FOURNIER!!! Ahren is stunned right now and barely able to stand on his feet as he leans up against the side ropes!! He’s trying to get the stars from out of his head after that massive kick! Meanwhile, Impact makes his way over to the side ropes! He grabs onto them as Ahren slowly gets his balance back and walks towards Impact.. SPRINGBOARD DROPKICK BY IMPACT CONNECTS ONTO AHREN FOURNIER AND SENDS HIM RIGHT DOWN TO THE CANVAS!!! Impact gets back up to his feet then makes his way over to Mr. DEDEDE before tagging him in!!
Jake Mercer: Here comes Mr. DEDEDE!!! You know, they call him DEDEDE because those were the grades he got in school. Straight D’s.
Flannery McCoy: I doubt that was the case in literature, because that man’s promos :whew:
Stew-O: Mr. DEDEDE quickly makes his way over to Ahren Fournier! He lifts him up and brings him up to his feet before delivering massive body shots!! RIGHT HAND!! LEFT!! RIGHT! LEFT!! ALL OF THESE PUNCHES ARE CONNECTING ONTO AHREN RIGHT NOW!! Ahren is forced to bend over and clutch at his abdomen to protect it, but Mr. DEDEDE grabs at his head and runs him over to a neutral corner where he bashes Fournier’s head right onto the top turnbuckle!! DEDEDE now switches back over to the body shots as he connects with not one, two, but three powerful shots to the stomach of his opponent!! Ahren grabs the corner ropes with one arm as he grabs at his stomach in pain with the other. Meanwhile, Mr. DEDEDE backs up towards the corner at the opposite end of the ring. He’s looking directly at Ahren who is clearly in pain right now.. AND MR. DEDEDE CHARGES AT HIM AT FULL SPEED!!! RAPTURE!!! RUNNING BOOT TO THE FACE OF AHREN IN THE CORNER CONNECTS!!! Mr. DEDEDE backs away as Ahren instantly falls down to the canvas of the ring!! DEDEDE then turns him over and goes for the pin!
Jake Mercer: And there’s the kick out by the GOAT!!
Stew-O: Mr. DEDEDE gets up to his knees as he turns his head and smirks over at the reigning Answers World Champion, Jamie O’Hara. Don’t forget. These two have quite the history with one another and put on one hell of a match at Pain for Pride. There’s a big chance that we can see a Pain for Pride rematch unfold here tonight if these two end up going head to head in the center of the ring!!
Flannery McCoy: Mr. DEDEDE gets back up to his feet and grabs Ahren Fournier by the head before lifting him up to his feet as well. DEDEDE grabs Fournier’s arm and irish whips him over to the far ropes!! Fournier bounces off of the ropes and back towards DEDEDE!! SCOOP SLAM!! MR. DEDEDE JUST PLANTED AHREN INTO THE MAT WITH THAT FEROCIOUS SCOOP SLAM!!! Mr. DEDEDE now pops up to his feet. He looks down at Ahren, then quickly runs to the ropes! He rebounds back.. CORKSCREW ELBOW DROP BY THE GAWD!!!
Stew-O: NO!!! AHREN MOVED OUT OF THE WAY AS MR. DEDEDE BASHES HIS ELBOW RIGHT DOWN ONTO THE MAT!! Mr. DEDEDE quickly curls up into a ball as he clutches at the back of his elbow in pain. Meanwhile, Ahren is slowly working up to his feet. Mr. DEDEDE is still down, clutching at his arm in pain, until he finally begins to work up to his feet as well.. KICK TO THE STOMACH BY AHREN FOURNIER!! Ahren now grabs Mr. DEDEDE and lifts him upside down.. PILEDRIVER BY AHREN FOURNIER CONNECTS AS HE DRILLS MR. DEDEDE’S HEAD RIGHT INTO THE CANVAS OF THE RING!!! Ahren gets back up to his feet and reaches his arm out to tag in the Answers World Champion, Jamie O’Hara!!
Flannery McCoy: Jamie now scales himself up to the top rope as Mr. DEDEDE is still down in the center of the ring.. What could he be thinking!?! TOP ROPE DOUBLE FOOTSTOMP BY JAMIE O’HARA!!! IT CONNECTS AS HIS BOOTS DRIVE RIGHT INTO THE STERNUM OF MR. DEDEDE!!!
Jake Mercer: Jamie O’Hara walks off to the side of Mr. DEDEDE as The GAWD is seen turned over onto his stomach, kicking his feet up and down after being drilled by that brutal double foot stomp. There is no doubt that Mr. DEDEDE is in tremendous pain right now!! He’s slowly working himself up to his feet.. WAIT NO!! JAMIE O’HARA QUICKLY GETS BEHIND HIM BEFORE DEDEDE COULD FULLY STAND UP AND DEADLIFTS HIM OFF OF THE GROUND… THEN SLAMS HIM BACK WITH A HIGH ANGLED GERMAN SUPLEX!!! Mr. DEDEDE hits the canvas hard with the back of his neck and upper back, as he rolls over to the side of the ring!!
Stew-O: Jamie O’Hara quickly stands up as he sees where DEDEDE is positioned.. His head is under the bottom rope and hanging over the ring apron. Jamie walks his way over to the side ropes, then steps through as he manages to make his way onto the ring apron. He’s staring down at Mr. DEDEDE as the GAWD slowly raises his head.. PENALTY KICK TO THE HEAD BY JAMIE O’HARA ON THE RING APRON!!!!
Flannery McCoy: NO!!! Mr. DEDEDE MANAGED TO BACK HIMSELF BACK INSIDE THE RING AS JAMIE O’HARA MISSED ENTIRELY!!! The Ace nearly loses his balance on the ring apron after putting so much force into that kick, but luckily for him, he was able to grab onto the ring ropes to prevent himself from falling off!! Mr. DEDEDE slowly grabs the ropes in front of him and uses them to get up to his feet where he stands toe to toe with Jamie O’Hara! O’hara on the ring apron, while DEDEDE is in the ring!! RIGHT HAND BY DEDEDE!!! RIGHT HAND BY O’HARA!! DEDEDE WITH ANOTHER RIGHT HAND!!! O’HARA WITH ONE OF HIS OWN IN RESPONSE!!! DEDEDE WITH A LEFT!! NOW A RIGHT FROM THE GAWD AND THAT ONE NEARLY DROPS JAMIE DOWN TO THE RINGSIDE FLOOR!!! BUT JAMIE HOLDS ONTO THE TOP ROPE AND USES IT TO LAUNCH HIMSELF FORWARD TO CONNECT WITH A MASSIVE FOREARM SHOT TO THE FACE OF MR. DEDEDE!!! ANOTHER FOREARM BY JAMIE!!! AND ANOTHER!!! That last shot caught Mr. DEDEDE right across the face, as he turns all the way around and clutches at his jaw!!! Jamie O’Hara quickly enters the ring, and runs to the far ropes! He bounces back towards Mr. DEDEDE… SLINGBLADE!!!!
Stew-O: NO!!! COMBAT ROLL EVASION BY MR. DEDEDE AS HE MOVES OUT OF THE WAY!! Jamie hits the canvas hard, but quickly gets back up to his feet and faces Mr. DEDEDE… BUT HE WALKS RIGHT INTO THE DEMOLITION CUTTER BY MR. DEDEDE!!! THE ACE’S FACE GETS PLANTED RIGHT INTO THE CANVAS OF THE RING!!! Mr. DEDEDE pops up to his feet as the momentum has definitely shifted back over to the Swords!! Mr. DEDEDE quickly makes his way over to a neutral corner! He’s bent down in an athletic stance! He’s waiting for Jamie O’Hara to make it to his feet.. Jamie slowly works himself up… SPEAR!!! SPEAR BY MR. DEDEDE!!!!!
Flannery McCoy: NO!!! JAMIE SIDE STEPS AS MR. DEDEDE MISSES!! DEDEDE slows down after he missed Jamie, but it’s O’Hara who gets behind him!! VISUAL IDENTITY!!!! BELLY TO BACK SUPLEX INTO A PILEDRIVER CONNECTS BY JAMIE O’HARA AND BOTH MEN ARE DOWN!!!
Jake Mercer: The Gawd and The Ace are both down in the center of the ring. Mr. DEDEDE may be out cold as O’Hara is breathing heavily right now and staring up at the ceiling. This virtual crowd is louder than ever after witnessing these two legends go back and forth with one another yet again tonight. Jamie slowly begins to crawl his way over to Ahren Fournier who has his arm extended out, trying to make the tag! Meanwhile, Mr. DEDEDE is slowly raising his head and looking over at Impact who is just as desperate to get tagged back into this match as Ahren! Mr. DEDEDE now begins to crawl his way over to Impact!! Both of these men know how important it will be to make this tag…
Flannery McCoy: AND AHREN HAS JUST BEEN TAGGED BACK INTO THIS MATCH!!!
Stew-O: AND SO HAS IMPACT AS MR. DEDEDE LEAPED HIS WAY OVER TO TAG HIM IN!!!
Flannery McCoy: Impact charges in at Ahren!! STEP UP ENZUIGIRI!!! NO!! Fournier ducks underneath the leg as Impact falls to the canvas!! He quickly rises to his feet, but Ahren is right behind him!! BELLY TO BACK SUPLEX CONNECTS BY FOURNIER!! Impact hits his head up against the canvas hard, but slowly works his way up to his feet! Ahren quickly shoots in on Impact’s leg, but Impact sprawl out to prevent himself from getting taken down! Ahren adusts and comes off to the side where he lifts Impact leg up in the air and stands up with it! Impact is hopping on one leg with his other being fully controlled by Ahren!! Impact with a forearm to the face of Fournier!! Another!! And another!!! BUT FOURNIER QUICKLY TAKES IMPACT DOWN BY SWEEPING HIS HOPPING LEG WITH A MASSIVE KICK!! IMPACT HAS BEEN TAKEN BACK DOWN TO THE MAT!!!
Stew-O: Impact is trying to get up, but Fournier quickly stomps down into the center of his back!! Impact again tries to get up, but this time Ahren runs to the ropes! He bounces back as Impact is now up to his feet.. RUNNING KNEE TO THE FACE BY FOURNIER!!! HE THEN FOLLOWS IT UP WITH A NECKBREAKER THAN SNAPS IMPACTS NECK RIGHT DOWN TO THE CANVAS OF THE RING!!! Impact clutches at his head in pain as Ahren hooks hooks the legs!!
Jake Mercer: NO!! There’s the kickout by Impact!!
Stew-O: Ahren quickly rises back up to his feet. He makes his way over to a neutral corner where he climbs himself up onto the second rope. Ahren looks down at Impact… DIVING DOUBLE FOOTSTOMP FROM THE SECOND ROPE BY AHREN FOURNIER!!!
Flannery McCoy: NO STEW!! Impact rolls out of the way as Ahren stumbles on his landing!! Impact gets up to his feet behind Ahren!!! THE HAIL MARY!!! FULL NELSON FACEBUSTER CONNECTS AS AHREN’S FACE GETS DRIVEN INTO RING!!! Impact quickly gets back up to his feet as he kicks Ahren in the side and forces him onto his back!! Impact runs to the ropes.. FLIGHT SIGHTS!!! LIONSAULT BY IMPACT CONNECTS!!! Impact goes for the pin!!
Stew-O: NO!! There’s the kickout by Fournier!!! Impact gets back up to his feet and reaces down at Ahren’s legs!! What is this.. He’s going for the… THE WALLS OF IMPACT!!! HE’S GOT THE WALLS OF IMPACT LOCKED IN THE CENTER OF THE RING!! AHREN IS SCREAMING IN PAIN!!! HE’S TRYING ALL HE CAN TO GRAB THE ROPES IN FRONT OF HIM, BUT IMPACT ISN’T ALLOWING IT!!! AHREN NEEDS TO TAP OUT AND HE JUST MIGHT RIGHT HERE!!! IMPACT IS LEANING BACK INTO THIS SUBMISSION HOLD AND APPLYING SO MUCH PRESSURE DOWN ONTO THE LOWER BACK OF HIS OPPONENT!! THE GOAT NEEDS TO DO GOAT THINGS RIGHT NOW IF HE INTENDS ON BREAKING OUT OF THIS HOLD!!!
Jake Mercer: HE IS!!! LOOK!!! He raises his head and is screaming in pain!! He actually sounds like an actual goat :goat-1: !!! BUT IT’S THOSE SCREAMS IN PAIN THAT BRING OUT HIS STRENGTH!! Ahren is now on his forearms and army crawling his way to the ropes!! He’s almost there! He’s crawling, and inching his way over to those ropes… His arm is extended out.. AND HE GRABS IT!!! AHREN GRABS THE ROPES!!!!!
Stew-O: Impact is frustrated as he releases his submission hold. He looks disappointed because that could have been the deal breaker right there!! Impact rises up to his feet and clutches at his head as he looks down at Ahren who is holding his lower back in pain. Ahren is slowly using the ropes to assist himself up to his feet.. Meanwhile, Impact backs away as he has his mind fully set on taking Ahren out.. Ahren stands up…
Flannery McCoy: Mr. DEDEDE just tagged himself in by tapping Impact on the back!! Impact has no idea!! Neither does Ahren… AND IMPACT CHARGES IN AT AHREN FOURNIER WITH THE FIST OF FURY!!!!!
Stew-O: NO!!!! AHREN DUCKS UNDERNEATH THE ARM AS IMPACT CONNECTS THE KNOCKOUT PUNCH RIGHT ONTO JAMIE O’HARA IN THE CORNER BEHIND HIM!!! THAT SHOT SENDS O’HARA DOWN TO THE RINGSIDE FLOOR. Impact is in shock that he missed as he turns around.. PROTECT YA NECK!!!! CLOTHESLINE FROM HELL FROM AHREN FOURNIER CONNECTS AS HE GOES DOWN FOR THE PIN!!!!!
Flannery McCoy: BUT THE REFEREE IS INFORMING AHREN THAT IMPACT ISN’T THE LEGAL MAN ANYMORE!!! Ahren looks confused, then turns his head..
Stew-O: IT’S MR. DEDEDE SQUATTING DOWN IN AN ATHLETIC POSITION IN THE CORNER!!! HE CHARGES AT AHREN AT FULL SPEED JUST AS AHREN WAS GETTING UP!!!!! SPEAR!!!!! SPEAR CONNECTS BY THE GAWD!!!! Ahren is out cold and Mr. DEDEDE hooks the legs!!!!!
(DING! DING! DING!)
(‘We Major’ by Kanye West and Nas hits, as Mr. DEDEDE rises up to his feet. He quickly goes over to Impact who is clutching at his head and neck in pain. DEDEDE explains what just happened to Impact as Impact responds with a satisfied smile on his face as the Liquid Swordz managed to advance onto the semi finals)
Stephie Love: Here are your winners and advancing onto the Grand Prix Semi Finals.. The Team of Impact and Mr. DEDEDE… LIQUID SWORDZ!!!!!
Stew-O: What an incredible match between these two teams. We all knew this match would be a treat for all of us seeing how high the level of competition in this match was.
Flannery McCoy: That’s for sure! It was a great effort by Mint Lads, but unfortunately for them, they weren’t enough to conquer this team that has proven to be seemingly unstoppable this season.
Jake Mercer: The Wet Daggers really did well tonight, and that quick tag at the end by Mr. DEDEDE was calculated perfectly.
Stew-O: It’s moves and calculations like that that could be the reason why they could potentially win this entire tournament. Remember, these two have some unfinished business with Sierra Bradford and Harper Lee after firing their best friend, Sarah Price and taking her Specialists title away. This win right here only brought them one step closer to completing their mission.. It must feel good to get this one out of the way. But anyways, that’s all for tonight folks. We’ll keep you updated as the Grand Prix continues on. See you all next time and have a wonderful night!
(Mr. DEDEDE and Impact are seen celebrating in the ring as Jamie O’Hara clutches at his Answers World Championship while assisting Ahren Fournier at ringside after their recent loss as the screen then fades to black)
(EAW Logo Buzzes)