John Helms
(EAW Logo Flashes)
(The footage opens with scenes of various landmarks in Alexandria, Egypt. It shows The Lighthouse of Alexandria known as Pharos, the Great Library and the beautiful sea port. But then it transitions to its history and Alexander The Great, the city founded by him….)
Narrator: Destiny. With one step closer to the showcase of the immortals, there is one final stop that will mold the rest of the season. We have seen Kings and Queens crowned, champions anointed and others forever etched in the annals of the EAW through a Hall of Fame. But for some, this is only the next chapter of their journey. Whatever the status, legendary, an old face, a new one, they are all here to make their mark…..
(The scene then switches to Astraea Jordan, Sienna Jade, Amber Keys, Sheridan Muller, Madison Kaline and finally Kassidy Heart.)
Narrator: But not everything will be preserved for the next generation to follow. There are those who will never go down fighting no matter the consequences.
(It transitions to Mr. DEDEDE snarling as SOSA Henderson is laughing. Haircare Kings, The High Rollerz and Off-Brand Amphetamines. Then it switches to Jay Jerry Johnson and Lucas Johnson.)
Narrator: But as Alexander the Great would go on to conquer such lands and stand against mighty Elephants, there are those who believe they can overcome any obstacle put in their way.
(Now the footage shows TLA holding up the Answers World Championship. Theron Nikolas looking on, then switching to Jon Kelton facing Alex Meyers. Finally it shows Drake King laugh while Brian Daniels shakes his head and smirks.)
Narrator: But in order to be the greatest, one must first test their might against those that want the exact same things. The Pharaohs believed the weakest to be executed. Is there such a thing in the battles which rage on as the lines are drawn in the sand?
(Charlie Marr is shown hugging the Hardcore Championship and then Ronan Malosi eyeing it carefully surrounded by the Rogues Gallery. Then it shows Jake Smith pointing to himself while Ronn Banks stands stoic, glaring at him.)
Narrator: For those who survive will forever be remembered like Alexander the Great and those who don’t? Will blow away like sands in the wind… looking for a path to Pain for Pride for this will forever be remembered as the Battle of Egypt III and who will Rise and who will Fall in Alexandria.
(The final picture shows an air shot of Alexandria.)
https://i.ibb.co/LZHb2jX/CCPOSTER4.png
Narrator: AND NOW PRESENTED BY ELDEN RING! THE LAST STOP BEFORE PAIN FOR PRIDE! EAW BRINGS TO YOU LIVE FROM BORG EL ARAB STADIUM… BATTLE OF EGYPT III: ALEXANDRIA FALLS!
(“Fall” by Daft Punk plays throughout the arena as the crowd around the stadium cheer in unison, up on their feet. The pyro goes off as the camera pans to the announce team of Dynasty’s Stew-O, Showdown’s Gavin Kirkland, and Voltage’s Persephone.)
Stew-O: WELCOME EVERYONE TO BEAUTIFUL ALEXANDRIA, EGYPT! THE EAW IS WELL REPRESENTED TONIGHT! I AM STEW-O FROM DYNASTY AND I AM JOINED BY GAVIN KIRKLAND REPRESENTING SHOWDOWN AND THE LOVELY PERSEPHONE REPRESENTING VOLTAGE AND WHAT A STACKED SHOW DO WE HAVE FOR YOU TONIGHT, NINE HUGE MATCHES WITH PAIN FOR PRIDE IMPLICATIONS! INCLUDING THE HUGE LADDER MATCH BETWEEN SIX LEGENDARY WOMEN THAT WILL DETERMINE WHO FACES ANDREA VALENTINE FOR THE UNIVERSAL WOMEN’S CHAMPIONSHIP IN LAS VEGAS!
Gavin Kirkland: SIX OF THE SEXIEST MILFS AND COUGARS! BUT WE ALSO HAVE FOUR CHAMPIONSHIP MATCHES WITH A TRIPLE THREAT TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP! NEW BREED TITLE ON THE LINE BETWEEN CHAMPION JON KELTON AND ALEX MYERS! THE HARDCORE TITLE IS ON THE LINE BETWEEN RONAN MALOSI AND CHARLIE MARR! THE ANSWERS WORLD TITLE WILL BE ON THE LINE AS THERON NIKOLAS FACES TLA! AND…. NO MORE LADIES MATCHES?! WTH!?!
Persephone: THEY WILL BEHEAD YOU HERE FOR GROPING WOMEN, GAVIN! ANYWAY, DON’T FORGET OUR FOSSIL OWNER, MR. DEDEDE TAKES ON SOSA HENDERSON IN WHAT SURE IS BET TO BE A SNOREFEST! ANOTHER DINOSAUR, BRIAN DANIELS IN WHAT SEEMS TO BE HIS LAST MATCH AGAINST THE OLDEST VIRGIN ON THE EAW ROSTER, DRAKE KING! FINALLY, THE JURASSIC TRIFECTA SEES RONN BANKS TAKE ON THE POOR SAP WHO HAS TO WRESTLE TWICE TONIGHT IN JAKE SMITH…. HOW “EXCITING ”… OH AND THE BATTLE OF THE JOHNSON’S… THAT SOUNDS SO DIRTY.
Stew-O: WITHOUT FURTHER ADO, LET’S KICK THINGS OFF WITH BATTLE OF EGYPT III: ALEXANDRIA FALLS!
(The camera cuts to Bella Braxton who is standing in the middle of the ring, ready to announce our next match.)
Bella Braxton: Ladies and Gentlemen! This tag team contest is a TRIPLE THREAT MATCH and it is scheduled for… ONE FALL!!
Crowd: ONE FALL!
Bella Braxton: And it is for your ELITE ANSWERS WRESTLING UNIFIED TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIPS!
(The crowd cheers loudly at the announcement that the next match is a title match.)
Bella Braxton: In this match, the first member of a team to pick up a pinfall or a submission will win the match for their team and the Tag Team Championships, and the champions do NOT have to be involved in the decision for the titles to change hands.
(“A&D” by YNL Jordan starts to play as Solomon Stane and Kirk Redwood enter the stadium to boos from the crowd. Kirk quickly polishes off a bottle of beer before they head to the ring. )
Bella Braxton: Introducing the CHALLENGERS! First, making their way to the ring and accompanied by Trixie Stane. At a total combined weight of 476 pounds. Here is the team of KIRK REDWOOD AND SOLOMON STANE! THE OFF BRAND AMPHETAMINES!
Stew-O: Here come the first of three teams for this Tag Team Title match. This team is considered the dark horse in this match because of the fact that they are the least established team in this match.
Persephone: What I want to know is how the hell that boozer got beer out here to ringside. Isn’t it illegal to do shit like that? Now let’s see if Mr. Chugs a Lot can make it to the ring without falling. Seriously? What the hell kind of tag team name is that? Off-Brand Amphetamines? Sounds like something you take for a crappy high.
Gavin Kirkland: Name kind of fits. Both of these men were part of separate tag teams. One team plagued by an unfortunate injury. The other team flat out hated each other. These two are looking to turn bad situations into good one by winning this match tonight.
Stew-O: What they lack in experience, they make up for in power. Solomon Stane is the biggest man in this matchup. Kirk Redwood is a former bare knuckle brawler who knows how to take a beating. Will that help them in this match as we bring out the next team.
(Solomon and Kirk enter the ring and take their place as the first of three teams in this match as the music fades off. A few seconds later, “I Get Money” by 50 Cent starts playing as Jack Ripley and David Davidson enter the stadium to a mixed reaction from the crowd before heading to the ring.)
Bella Braxton: Their opponents! First, making their way to the ring. At a total combined weight of 417 pounds. Here is the team of JACK RIPLEY AND DAVID DAVIDSON… THE HIGH ROLLERZ!
Gavin Kirkland: Here comes the team that many are considering the favorites in this match. We talked about how Stane and Redwood were the least experienced team, The High Rollerz are the most experienced team in terms of being a team. They are looking to prove that they most definitely still got it as they head to the ring.
Persephone: Why the hell are they here? I can smell them all the way over here. They smell like cheap booze and cheap prostitutes. Those idiots need to go back to the dumpster where they belong.
Stew-O: The High Rollerz hold the record number of reigns as a team as former 3 time champions. They are looking to climb to the top of the Tag Team division together for the fourth time in their careers. If they win this match, they will extend the team record, but they will also find themselves tied for the individual record as well.
(Jack and David take their corner and send a smirk over Kirk and Solomon’s way as their entrance theme fades out. Seconds later, “Shake It” by Metro Station starts playing throughout the stadium as Jake Smith and Chris Elite enter with the crowd going wild with cheers. They hold their Tag Team Titles high in the air before making their way to the ring.)
Bella Braxton: Finally, making their way to the ring. At a total combined weight of 420 pounds. Here are the REIGNING AND DEFENDING ELITE ANSWERS WRESTLING UNIFIED TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS! JAKE SMITH! CHRIS ELITE! THE HAIRCARE KINGS!
Stew-O: Here come the reigning Tag Team Champions. The team that most people didn’t even expect to get anywhere near the Tag Titles have had a virtual stranglehold on this division since they won the titles back in December.
Persephone: Oh yay. Everybody needs to give a round of applause. The team sponsored by step ladders and Rogaine for men are here. What is this? Be nice to dumbasses day?
Gavin Kirkland: They are here to defend their Tag Team Titles in a few moments. This won’t be the only time we will see Jake Smith in action here tonight. Later on, he will be facing the legendary Ronn Banks in singles action. Jake would love to get some momentum started with a victory here tonight.
Stew-O: He certainly would. The Haircare Kings have held the titles for 153 days. That stat right there should be enough to eliminate the doubt in anybody’s minds about their strength and success as a tag team. If there are still any doubters, winning this triple threat match will help their cause. The champions are tough, but you can’t discount the challengers. Who will leave Egypt with the Tag Team Titles? We’re about to find out.
(The referee tries their best to keep all three teams separated and get them all into their neutral corners. It takes a whole bunch of effort and trying, but it is accomplished. Chris and Jake give the referee the Tag Team Title belts and the referee holds them in the air before showing them to champions and challengers. The referee hands the belts over to the timekeeper before calling for the bell.)
(DING! DING! DING!)
Stew-O: Here we go! Match is underway! Tag Team Titles are on the line in a triple threat match. Sudden death rules are applied in this match as first pinfall or first submission wins the match and the titles. So the champions’ reign is in bigger jeopardy than usual.
Gavin Kirkland: That’s right. Chris and Jake don’t even have to be involved in the decision to lose the titles. With this very unique match, there comes very unique rules. In this match, one member of all three teams will be in the ring at the same time.
Stew-O: That’s right. Also, this is not Texas Tornado style. Teams MUST tag in and tag out of the match. Speaking of that rule, we have Jake Smith starting off for the champions, Jack Ripley for the High Rollerz, and Kirk Redwood starting off for the Off-Brand Amphetamines.
Persephone: You’re going to need some amphetamines after you get a headache trying to say that whole damn team name. Hopefully this doesn’t mean that the match will stretch out longer than absolutely necessary because I am already sick of looking at all of them. Couldn’t we just skip this match and move on with our lives. Especially since we’re starting off with Mighty Midget, The Boozer, and a mutant front the smoked filled casinos of Las Vegas. Beautiful.
Stew-O: No we absolutely can’t skip this match because we’ve already started. KIRK AND JACK ARE GANGING UP ON JAKE TO START THIS MATCH! SMART STRATEGY BY THE CHALLENGERS TO TAKE THE CHAMPION OUT EARLY TO GUARANTEE THE TITLES CHANGE HANDS!
Gavin Kirkland: Kirk and Jack are working together for the time being and take Jake down with a double suplex. Both men are now trying to mount Jake and beat down on him more, BUT LOOK HOW QUICKLY THE ALLIANCE BROKE DOWN! KIRK TRIED FIRST, BUT HE WAS PULLED RIGHT OFF BY JACK! NOW JACK AND KIRK ARE GLARING AT EACH OTHER!
Persephone: Now the boozer and the casino rat are shoving at each other. Surprise surprise. I thought Jake would be the one to backstab an alliance first in this match. But of course you can’t have friends in this match. One winner. Stupid idiots.
Stew-O: KIRK JUST SLAPPED JACK IN THE FACE AND THAT DID NOTHING MORE THAN JUST PISS JACK OFF! JACK JUST THREW A PUNCH RIGHT IN THE JAW OF KIRK AND THAT STAGGERED KIRK! Jack grabs Kirk and whips him into the corner of the High Rollerz and follows quickly behind with a clothesline. Kirk stumbles out of the corner and Jack tags in David.
(TAG!)
Gavin Kirkland: David Davidson is now in the match AND THE HIGH ROLLERZ HIT THE DOUBLE TEAM CLOTHESLINE TO THE BACK OF KIRK’S HEAD! KIRK IS DOWN AND THE HIGH ROLLERZ ARE IN CONTROL!
Stew-O: David is now on the back of Kirk and he is just firing elbow after elbow to the back of Kirk’s head. HOLD ON A SECOND! HERE COMES JAKE SMITH TAKING DOWN DAVID WITH A FLIPPING NECKBREAKER! The action is going to be fast and furious in this match. You can’t take your eye off either opponent for a second.
Persephone: They’re all going to have trouble in that department. High Rollerz are surrounded by casino smoke. The Drunks probably see doubles of everybody so that’s already tough for those dumbasses. Then we have baldy and the midget… don’t even get me started.
Stew-O: Jake has David and he rolls him over on his stomach AND HE IS JUST DELIVERING PUNT AFTER PUNT TO THE RIBS! JAKE JUST TRYING TO WEAKEN HIS OPPONENTS IN ANY WAY HE CAN!
(TAG!)
Gavin Kirkland: UH OH! DAVID AND JAKE ARE FIGHTING AMONGST EACH OTHER AND THEY DIDN’T SEE THAT THEY LET KIRK TAG IN SOLOMON STANE! JAKE WAS BRINGING DAVID TO HIS FEET AND THEY BOTH HAVE THE SAME LOOK OF “OH SHIT!”.
Stew-O: We might be about to see another quick alliance in this match because Solomon is the biggest man in this match and they need to try to neutralize him as quickly as possible. They both run in for the attack AND SOLOMON CLOBBERS THEM BOTH WITH A DOUBLE CLOTHESLINE!
Persephone: BAHAHAHA! That’s what I like to call a 2 for 1 special. Tall drunk took out two idiots with one shot. Now hurry up and finish this match. This is so boring. Should have brought a pillow because I am about to fall asleep.
Stew-O: That’s what they need to worry about. Not letting Solomon Stane get an opportunity to show off his power and that is exactly what is about to happen. Jake and David are back to their feet. SOLOMON GOES FOR A BIG BOOT THAT DAVID DUCKS, BUT JAKE DOESN’T AND HE JUST GETS CLOBBERED BY THE BOOT AND JAKE IS DOWN AGAIN! JAKE ROLLS AWAY FROM THE ACTION AND NOW SOLOMON FOCUSES ON DAVID!
Gavin Kirkland: David drug back up to his feet by his hair and SOLOMON JUST DELIVERED A HEADBUTT TO DAVID! DAVID MIGHT BE OUT ON THIS FEET AS SOLOMON KICKS DAVID IN THE GUT AND HOISTS HIM UP IN THE AIR!
Stew-O: LOOK AT THE POWER OF SOLOMON STANE! HE’S HAD DAVID UP IN THE AIR FOR A FEW MOMENTS ALREADY! THE BLOOD HAS TO BE RUSHING TO DAVID’S HEAD!
Persephone: Better than the smell of smoke and prostitutes that he’s usually engulfed in. He can come down now! No need to stretch this any longer than necessary, you talk drunk!
Stew-O: He must have heard you because HE JUST DROPPED DAVID WITH THE DELAYED VERTICAL SUPLEX! SOLOMON HOOKS THE LEG FOR THE FIRST COVER OF THE MATCH!
ONNNNNNNNNEEEEE!
TWWWWWWOOOOO!!
Gavin Kirkland: David kicks out after two and it will take much more than that to take out a former 3 time Tag Team Champion and I think Solomon Stane knows that.
Stew-O: Solomon picks up David again and has him on his shoulders. SOLOMON LOOKING FOR A SAMOAN DROP–
Gavin Kirkland: JAKE SMITH JUST PULLED DAVID FROM SOLOMON’S SHOULDERS! SOLOMON GOES FOR ANOTHER DOUBLE CLOTHESLINE BUT THEY DUCK IT AND HIT THE ROPES!
(TAG!)
Stew-O: DAVID AND JAKE GO FOR A DOUBLE DROPKICK, BUT SOLOMON GRABS DAVID AND HAS A HOLD OF HIM! SOLOMON USES DAVID AS A WEAPON AND TAKES JAKE BACK DOWN! BUT HE DOESN’T REALIZE THAT CHRIS ELITE MADE THE TAG IN AND IS ON THE TOP ROPE AND HE JUST DELIVERS A MISSILE DROPKICK TO THE BACK OF DAVID TAKING BOTH MEN DOWN TO THE MAT!
Persephone: Don’t rock the big dumb idiot too much because if he rocks a lot he might puke from all the booze he drank. Then that skank wife of his can clean up the mess when she’s down playing the part of Kitty Litter sliding up and down the shiny pole.
Gavin Kirkland: You are just jealous that he’s married and you’re not.
Persephone: Fuck off, you obnoxious prick!!
Gavin Kirkland: Anyways, the force of the dropkick sends David rolling to the ropes and Solomon slow to get back to his feet. BUT CHRIS ISN’T GOING TO LET THAT HAPPEN! CHRIS GRABS THE HEAD OF SOLOMON AND TAKES HIM BACK DOWN WITH A SNAP SUPLEX! CHRIS HITS THE ROPES AS SOLOMON TRIES TO GET BACK UP AND CHRIS CLOCKS HIM IN THE BACK OF THE HEAD WITH “DREAMING”! HE GOT ALL OF THAT AND CHRIS GOES FOR THE COVER!
ONNNNEEEEEEEE!
TWWWWWOOOOO!!
TTHHHRRREEE-
Stew-O: SOLOMON KICKS OUT BEFORE THREE!! BUT DAMN! DID YOU SEE SOLOMON THROW CHRIS HALFWAY ACROSS THE RING WHEN HE KICKED OUT?
Persephone: He must have borrowed Mighty Midget’s cape because Baldy sure as hell flew. All they need is some stupid superhero theme song and we have a cartoon for morons. You know? Something you two idiots can watch together.
Stew-O: Being thrown doesn’t stop Chris in the slightest because HE JUST CAUGHT SOLOMON WITH A LOW VERSION OF THE PELE KICK! HEAD SHOT CONNECTS! AND HE DRAGS SOLOMON TO HIS CORNER AND TAGS JAKE BACK INTO THE MATCH!
(TAG!)
Gavin Kirkland: Solomon brought back to his feet and the Haircare Kings whip him to the ropes. Chris grabs him off the rebound taking up for the flapjack, BUT THERE’S JAKE CATCHING SOLOMON AS HE COMES DOWN AND PLANTS HIM WITH THE CUTTER! BEAUTIFUL DOUBLE TEAM MOVE BY THE TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS AS JAKE GOES FOR THE COVER!
Stew-O: WAIT A SECOND! THERE’S DAVID DAVIDSON! WHERE THE HELL DID HE GO? HE CATCHES JAKE FROM BEHIND AND ROLLS HIM UP! WILL DAVID STEAL THE TITLES RIGHT HERE?
ONNNNNNNNEEEEEEE!
TWWWWWWWWOOOO!!
THHHHHHRRRRREEE–
Gavin Kirkland: JAKE ROLLED THROUGH BEFORE THE THREE COUNT! THAT’S PULLING A CARD FROM YOUR SLEEVE BY DAVIDSON! Jake is back to his feet and David goes for an elbow, BUT JAKE DUCKS IT AND GRABS DAVID’S ARM AT THE LAST MOMENT AND PULLS DAVID DOWN INTO A BACKBREAKER! CREATIVE COUNTER BY JAKE!
Persephone: Don’t give that microscopic pain in the ass any credit! His ego will swell up and be bigger than he is. That’s the last thing we need to happen since everybody has spent all season deflating his ego.
Stew-O: HERE COMES SOLOMON STANE WITH AN ELBOW STRIKE TO THE BACK OF THE HEAD! JAKE IS ON SPAGHETTI LEGS AS SOLOMON TAGS IN KIRK!
(TAG!)
Stew-O: Kirk Redwood back in the match as Solomon Stane picks up Jake AND DROPS HIM WITH THE STUN GUN THROAT FIRST ACROSS THE TOP ROPE AND KIRK FOLLOWS THAT UP WITH A NICE UPPERCUT TO THE CHIN! AMAZING DOUBLE TEAM ACTION WE HAVE BEEN WITNESSING IN THIS MATCH!
Persephone: Will you shut up? If they keep doing these double team moves, then the match will have to go on because they want to win the titles or some bullshit and that is going to just drive me crazy! Stop being so efficient. I hate it!
Gavin Kirkland: Efficient as always, my queen.
Persephone: Unless you are Rex McAllister, which you aren’t, you need to stop all this crap you creepy bastard!
Gavin Kirkland: :mjcry:
Stew-O: Once again, I am the sanest one at the broadcast booth. Kirk is the only one standing at the moment and there is nothing pretty about Kirk Redwood’s offense.
Persephone: There’s nothing pretty about Kirk Redwood, period. He can’t even make himself look prettier with all the booze he drinks.
Stew-O: Oh shut up! I was going to say that his offense is VERY effective. All he wants to do is hurt somebody and unfortunately it’s Jake in his sights. Kirk brings Jake back to his feet and STARTS THROWING JAB AFTER JAB INTO JAKE’S FACE, TURNING JAKE INTO A PUNCHING BAG!
Gavin Kirkland: This is probably the biggest opportunity in Kirk’s career and he is not going to let it slip through his fingers as he backs Jake into the corner AND DELIVERS A KNIFE EDGE CHOP TO THE CHEST! HOLY SHIT! YOU COULD HEAR THAT ALL THE WAY IN THE PARKING LOT!
Persephone: Excuse me! Have you found Mighty Midget’s chest muscles? They flew out like the socks he uses to stuff his boots to make him taller. BAHAHAHAHAHA!
Stew-O: DAMN! ANOTHER CHOP BY KIRK AND JAKE IS STARTING TO LOOK LIKE A TOMATO WITH HOW RED HIS CHEST IS GETTING AFTER TWO CHOPS! Now Kirk picks up Jake and he is sitting on the top turnbuckle! Kirk climbs up to the top AND HE IS LOOKING FOR A SUPERPLEX!
Gavin Kirkland: JAKE IS BLOCKING IT! JAKE DOING EVERYTHING HE CAN TO NOT GET HIT WITH THE SUPERPLEX AND NOW KIRK IS NOW JUST POUNDING JAKE’S BACK TO STOP HIM FROM BLOCKING AGAIN!
Stew-O: Kirk is going to try again with the superplex, BUT WAIT! HERE COMES DAVID DAVIDSON TO THE TURNBUCKLE! HOW THE HELL DOES HE KEEP RANDOMLY APPEARING! KIRK FINALLY HAS JAKE UP BUT HIS EYES GO WIDE WHEN HE REALIZES THAT HE’S MOVING TOO! DOWN THEY GO!!
Gavin Kirkland: SUPERPLEX POWERBOMB COMBO! THE TOWER OF DOOM HAS FOUND ITS WAY INTO THIS TITLE MATCH! AND JAKE SMITH GOT THE WORST OF IT BEING AT THE TOP OF THE TOWER!
Stew-O: DAVID IS THE ONLY ONE MOVING AND HE IS GOING TO TAKE ADVANTAGE! DAVID SCRAMBLES OVER TO JAKE AND GOES FOR THE COVER! DO WE HAVE 4 TIME CHAMPIONS ON THE WAY?
ONNNNNNNNNNEEEE!
TWWWWWWWWOOOO!
THHHHHRRRREEEEEE!!
Persephone: Damn! The midget kicked out and now the gambling fog is trying going over to get the cover on the boozer and trying this shit again with the pin. I want it to work but we all know how it’s really going to go!
ONNNNNNNNNNNEEEE!
TWWWWWWWOOOOOO!!
THHHHHHRRREEEEEEEE–
Stew-O: HERE COMES SOLOMON STANE TO BREAK UP THE PIN WITH A BOOT TO DAVID’S HEAD!
Persephone: Told ya. I hate being right in these situations.
Stew-O: HERE COMES JACK RIPLEY AND HE IS TRYING TO GET HIS HANDS ON SOLOMON! THE REFEREE IS NOW HAVING A HARD TIME GETTING THEM BACK TO THEIR NEUTRAL CORNERS–
Gavin Kirkland: WHAT THE HELL IS CHRIS ELITE DOING? THE REFEREE’S BACK IS STILL TURNED AND HE JUMPS OFF THE TOP ROPE AND TAKES DAVID DOWN WITH A SPRINGBOARD TORNADO DDT! DAVID PLANTED ON HIS HEAD AND CHRIS FOUND A GOLDEN OPPORTUNITY TO GET INVOLVED IN THE MATCH!
Stew-O: Chris Elite just slid out of the ring and nobody noticed what just happened and the referee just barely managed to get Solomon and Jack back to their corners. David is in a hard way and he really needs to get a tag into Jack Ripley.
Persephone: Or how about not? That means the match can end much quicker and then I can go back to fantasizing about Sexy Rexy in a Pharaoh’s costume.
Gavin Kirkland: You are one deprived bitch.
Persephone: Shut your fucking mouth unless you want to leave Egypt with your teeth in a jar.
Gavin Kirkland: Anyways, David realizes that he needs to make a tag and he’s doing everything he can to get to his corner. DAVID IS ABOUT AN ARM LENGTH AWAY FROM JACK, BUT KIRK STOPS THAT THOUGHT OFF REAL QUICK WITH A HEADBUTT TO JACK RIPLEY, KNOCKING HIM OFF THE APRON!
Stew-O: THE CROWD DIDN’T LIKE THAT ONE BIT AND THEY ARE LETTING KIRK HEAR IT! BUT KIRK DOESN’T CARE! He just drags David back into the center of the ring and just starts mauling him!
Gavin Kirkland: This isn’t some bareknuckle street fight, but Kirk is certainly making it seem like that right now bashing his fists into David’s poor skull. David doing the best he can to block the punches being fired at him.
Persephone: That nitwit should get punched in the head. It might help knock some sense into that smoke filled head of his. Now hurry up and finish this match so I can go back to thinking about my Sexy Rexy!
Stew-O: You don’t need the match end to be thinking about him. Your brain must be affected with all the hair dye you use or you were never right in the head to begin with.
Persephone: Shut your damn mouth, old fuck! Thank gawd you’re on Dynasty because if I had to work with you every week, I’d be knocking your fake teeth out every time I saw your stupid face.
(TAG!)
Stew-O: JAKE SMITH JUST TAGGED BACK INTO THE MATCH AND HE HITS THE SO LONG AND GOOD NIGHT! BOMAYE KNEE TO THE SIDE OF KIRK’S HEAD, BUT LOOK AT KIRK! HE IS STILL ABLE TO MAKE IT TO HIS FEET! HE’S NOT CARING TO WAIT AS JAKE SHOVES KIRK DOWN AND GOES FOR THE COVER!
ONNNNNNNNEEEEE!
TWWWWWWOOOOO!!
THHHHHHRRRRRR–
Gavin Kirkland: DAVID BREAKS UP THE PIN AS THE REFEREE WAS COMING DOWN FOR THE THREE! JAKE AND DAVID SHOVE KIRK INTO THE CORNER! THEY BOTH GO TO CLOTHESLINE KIRK–
Persephone: The Drunk comes out of the corner and goes for a clothesline of his own. Big shocker that he can walk a straight line right now. Look what he did, the big lush! He missed one! He got the midget, but missed the fog.
Stew-O: BUT JAKE HOLDS ONTO KIRK’S ARM TO STAY ON HIS FEET! JAKE GETS HIS SENSES QUICK ENOUGH TO SLAP KIRK IN THE FACE–
Gavin Kirkland: THEY DON’T SEE DAVID ON THE APRON AS HE JUMPS TO THE TOP ROPE! SPRINGBOARD 450! BUT WAIT HE GRABS BOTH JAKE AND KIRK’S HEADS AND PLANTS THEM BOTH WITH A MODIFIED TORNADO DDT!
Stew-O: THAT IS VERY INNOVATIVE OFFENSE BY DAVID DAVIDSON! HE TURNED HIS ACE IN THE HOLE MOVE, THE SPRINGBOARD 450, INTO A TORNADO DDT IN A FRACTION OF A SECOND!
Persephone: Look! Another 2 for 1 special on idiots! Around this place, this won’t be the last time we have discounted specials on stupidity!
Stew-O: How could you call any of the people in this match stupid? They are putting their hearts, their souls, and their bodies on the line in order to leave as Unified Tag Team Champions. Regardless of what the crowd thinks of them personally, they are all amazing competitors.
Persephone: Talk with James Peters sometime. He will explain to you the awesomeness that is Persephone.
Gavin Kirkland: As Persephone was flirting with another man around her–
Persephone: Go fuck yourself, pervert.
Gavin Kirkland: Don’t interrupt, bitch. As I was saying, all three men are down and doing their best to crawl to their respective corners. All three men have had their bells rung so it will be interesting to see who gets tagged in first.
Persephone: They are all crawling on the mat like a bunch of sadsacks and it looks like it’s going to be Drunky tagging in his buddy the Tall Drunk first.
(TAG!)
Stew-O: Solomon Stane back in and he grabs David’s ankle. DAVID HOPPING ON ONE ANKLE BEFORE CATCHING SOLOMON IN THE SIDE OF THE NECK WITH AN ENZUIGIRI AS HE MAKES THE LAST LEAP TO TAG IN JACK RIPLEY!
(TAG!)
Gavin Kirkland: HE GOT THE TAG!! JACK HAS BEEN WAITING A VERY LONG TIME TO GET BACK INTO THE MATCH AND HE’S READY TO CAUSE SOME TROUBLE, BUT THEY LEFT JAKE ALL BY HIMSELF TO CRAWL TO THE CORNER TO TAG IN CHRIS! SOLOMON CAUGHT JACK WITH A RIGHT HAND BEFORE CATCHING JAKE ABOUT TO REACH THE CORNER, BUT IT MIGHT BE TOO LATE–
(TAG!)
Stew-O: IT WAS TOO LATE! CHRIS ELITE HAS BEEN TAGGED BACK IN THE MATCH! ELITE SPRINGBOARDS IN LIKE A HOUSE OF FIRE AND HE TAKES SOLOMON DOWN TO THE MAT WITH A POWERFUL LARIAT!
Gavin Kirkland: RIPLEY FIRES AN ELBOW BUT ELITE DUCKS IT AND DROPKICKS DAVID’S ANKLE AND SENDS HIM CRASHING TO THE FLOOR! RIPLEY GRABS CHRIS AND GOES FOR THE DOUBLE KNEE BACKBREAKER–
Stew-O: ELITE HELD ONTO THE ROPES SENDING JACK CRASHING TO THE MAT! JACK GETS BACK TO HIS FEET AND ELITE CATCHES HIM WITH A KNEE UNDER THE CHIN! OPEN YA MATA CONNECTS!
Gavin Kirkland: BUT HE DOESN’T GET A CHANCE TO ENJOY IT AS SOLOMON STANE KICKS CHRIS ELITE RIGHT IN THE FACE WITH A BIG BOOT SENDING CHRIS TO THE APRON!
Stew-O: STANE BRINGS RIPLEY BACK UP TO HIS FEET AND BUT HIM ON HIS BACK WEARING JACK RIPLEY LIKE A BACKPACK! SOLOMON STANE IS GOING FOR THE SOUND OF SILENCE! BACKPACK STUNNER ON THE WAY! BUT JACK MANAGES TO SLIDE OFF SOLOMON’S BACK BEFORE HE GETS STUNNED!
Persephone: Stupid moron! He had a chance to win the match and he completely screwed it up once again. No wonder all these nitwits can’t get the job done! Now just hurry up and end this match.
Stew-O: RIPLEY NOW BEHIND SOLOMON AND RIPLEY DELIVERS A DROPKICK TO THE BACK OF SOLOMON’S KNEES SENDING HIM DOWN TO THE GROUND! RIPLEY HITS THE ROPES AS FAST AS HE COULD AND HE JUST CLOBBERED SOLOMON WITH THE POINT OF HIS KNEE!
Gavin Kirkland: DAYLIGHT SLAYING TIME! HE GOT ALL OF IT RIGHT TO SOLOMON STANE’S TEMPLE. SOLOMON FALLS TO THE MAT AND RIPLEY GOES FOR THE COVER! LEG HOOKED!
ONNNNNNNNNNNEEEEEE!
TWWWWWWWOOOOOOO!!
TTTHHHHHHRRRREEEEEE!!
Stew-O: KIRK COMES IN TO BREAK UP THE PIN AND HERE COMES EVERYBODY ELSE! IT TOOK LONG ENOUGH FOR THIS TO HAPPEN, BUT WE HAVE A BRAWL PICKING UP RIGHT NOW! ALL SIX MEN ARE IN THE RING GOING AFTER EACH OTHER!
Persephone: Why couldn’t we just do this from the very beginning! It would have made things so much simpler and so much quicker! I hate it when people make things much more complicated than necessary. They should have just rang the bell and let them kill each other.
Stew-O: I THINK THE REFEREE HAS GIVEN UP ALL HOPE ON TRYING TO KEEP CONTROL OF THIS MATCH AND IS JUST GOING TO LET THEM FIGHT IT OUT! I DON’T THINK THE CROWD MINDS BECAUSE LISTEN TO THEM GOING ABSOLUTELY CRAZY!
Crowd: LET THEM FIGHT! LET THEM FIGHT! LET THEM FIGHT! LET THEM FIGHT!
Persephone: Of course they are going to chant that! No matter where we go, the crowds always chant like sheep! How about everybody just be quiet and just let this match just end.
Stew-O: JACK IS FIGHTING CHRIS ELITE! SOLOMON AND DAVID ARE GOING AT IT! THAT LEAVES JAKE AND KIRK FIGHTING! SPEAKING OF KIRK! HE JUST HIT JAKE WITH A HIGH KNEE THAT SENDS JAKE TO THE ROPES! KIRK TRIES FOR A EUROPEAN UPPERCUT BUT JAKE GETS THE BOOT UP–
Persephone: Of course it didn’t work! Drunky catches the boot before it catches him in the face and he sends Mighty Midget flipping backwards over the top rope and trying to send him to the floor. With all the double vision that drunken nitwit has had, I’m surprised he picked the right boot.
Gavin Kirkland: HE PICKED THE RIGHT BOOT AND HE TRIED TO SEND JAKE TO THE FLOOR BUT JAKE LANDED ON THE APRON AFTER BEING THROWN BACKWARDS BY KIRK! KIRK FIRES OFF A RIGHT HAND, BUT JAKE IS ABLE TO BLOCK IT! JAKE CATCHES KIRK IN THE TEMPLE WITH A KICK, BUT HERE COMES SOLOMON STANE WITH A HEADBUTT KNOCKING JAKE LOOPY.
Persephone: The headbutt didn’t do that. That midget has always been a few fries short of a Happy Meal. Must have been when he was a child. He was so small that he fell through the netting and crashed in a ball pit. :mjlol:
Stew-O: Jake manages to keep his balance on the apron, but what is Solomon doing? SOLOMON HAS JUST PICKED UP HIS OWN TAG TEAM PARTNER! WHAT IS GOING TO DO WITH KIRK?
Gavin Kirkland: HOLY SHIT! SOLOMON JUST USED HIS OWN TAG TEAM PARTNER AS A PROJECTILE AND THREW HIM OVER THE TOP ROPE TAKING JAKE SMITH OFF THE APRON AND DOWN TO THE FLOOR!
Persephone: What an idiot! Yeah, he took out Mighty Midget, but he also took out his tag team partner as well. Now he’s fighting the rest of this match on his own because of the way his tag partner landed on the outside. Stupid!
Gavin Kirkland: Solomon is smirking at the splatter he made of Jake on the floor outside, but he is completely sidetracked with his handiwork THAT HE DOESN’T SEE CHRIS ELITE RIGHT BEHIND HIM! SOLOMON TURNS AROUND AND HE JUST GOT UP CLOSE AND PERSONAL WITH GAWD GIVEN GREATNESS! BOX OFFICE SMASH CONNECTS RIGHT ON THE JAW! SOLOMON CAUGHT ALL OF THAT KICK!
Stew-O: SOLOMON STANE IS OUT COLD AFTER THE BOX OFFICE SMASH SUPERKICK! CHRIS ELITE PROUD OF HIS HANDIWORK AND HE HAS NO IDEA THAT JACK RIPLEY IS RIGHT BEHIND HIM!
Gavin Kirkland: Chris Elite just turned around AND HE IS MET WITH A SUPERKICK OF HIS OWN TO THE FACE! YOU’LL FLOAT TOO! BY JACK RIPLEY! TURNABOUT IS FAIR PLAY! CHRIS ELITE HAS GOT TO BE ON DREAM STREET AFTER HE GOT A TASTE OF HIS OWN MEDICINE WITH THAT KICK!
Persephone: Dream Street? That bald weirdo has been on Dream Street ever since he started teaming with Mighty Midget Jake Smith. So what else is new? I’m surrounded by morons.
Stew-O: JACK RIPLEY MAKES HIS WAY TO THE TOP ROPE AND DAVID HAS HOLD OF CHRIS’ NECK! JACK RIPLEY JUMPS OFF THE TOP TURNBUCKLE AND CATCHES CHRIS WITH A CROSSBODY AS DAVID CATCHES HIM WITH THE NECKBREAKER! DANGEROUS DOUBLE TEAM MOVE!
Gavin Kirkland: OF COURSE IT’S DANGEROUS! THAT’S THE JACKPOT! HIGH ROLLERZ JUST HIT THE JACKPOT! AND THE JACKPOT MIGHT BE THE TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIPS! JACK RIPLEY SCRAMBLES BACK ON TOP OF CHRIS AND GETS INTO THE COVER! LEG IS HOOKED! ARE THE HIGH ROLLERZ ON THEIR WAY TO BECOMING 4 TIME TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS?
ONNNNNNNNNNNNEEEEE!
TWWWWWWWWWOOOOO!!
THHHHHHHHRRRRRRRREEE!!
…
…
Stew-O: WHAT IN THE HELL IS GOING ON? JACK RIPLEY HAD THE MATCH WON FOR THE HIGH ROLLERZ!!! THE MATCH WAS JUST ABOUT TO END, AND JACK RIPLEY WAS PULLED OUT OF THE RING!!!!!
Gavin Kirkland: HOLY SHIT! WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT? WE WERE LESS THAN A SECOND AWAY FROM NEW TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS AND NOW THIS HAPPENS!?!?
Persephone: Aw. How cute. Now the smoky gambler’s buddy is looking at the situation all confused. He turned around and now David was just pulled out of the ring as well. Fitting. Tag team partners suffering the same fate.
Gavin Kirkland: THEY ARE SUFFERING THE SAME FATE! BOTH OF THE HIGH ROLLERZ ARE PULLED OUT OF THE RING JUST AS THEY WERE ABOUT TO WIN THE UNIFIED TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIPS, AND NOW THEY’RE BOTH SENT CRASHING INTO THE STEEL STEPS!!!! THE HIGH ROLLERZ WERE JUST SCREWED OVER, AND LOOK WHO IT IS!!!!!
(The camera closes in on the Jaded Hearts, Kassidy Heart and Sienna Jade, wearing matching gear appropriate for the Battle of Egypt event, as well as the new Jaded Heart exclusive beanies available on the EAW Shop, covering their hair so it can’t be seen. The crowd is freaking out after seeing the Jaded Hearts do that to the High Rollerz, knowing that doing something like that really isn’t allowed.)
Stew-O: WHAT DID THE JADED HEARTS JUST DO??? KASSIDY HEART AND SIENNA JADE JUST THREW THE HIGH ROLLERZ INTO THE STEEL STEPS, THEY JUST SCREWED THE HIGH ROLLERZ OVER!!!
Gavin Kirkland: :will: Why won’t Kassidy Heart just go away? It’s bad enough I have to see her once, now she’s showing up to other matches uninvited???
Persephone: Now you know how I feel like literally every episode of Voltage.
Stew-O: The Jaded Hearts have entered the ring and they look pretty proud of what they’ve done to the High Rollerz, meanwhile everyone else in the match looks lifeless! So much has happened in this match, and thanks to the Jaded Hearts there’s not really anybody that can capitalize!
Gavin Kirkland: Oh no, LOOK AT KASSIDY! CHRIS IS DOWN AND SHE PICKS HIM AND TOSSES HIM TO SIENNA JADE! DON’T TELL ME THESE TWO ARE STILL HOLDING A GRUDGE AGAINST CHRIS ELITE FROM SEASON 13 :noah: KASS IS DOWN ON ONE KNEE AND SIENNA RUNS WITH CHRIS! WHAT IS SHE DOING??? HAVEN’T THEY DONE ENOUGH??
Stew-O: SIENNA JADE JUST SENT CHRIS’ HEAD RIGHT INTO THE POINT OF KASSIDY’S KNEE! THAT’S THE BEAUTY KILLER! WE HAVEN’T SEEN THAT FOR A WHILE! AND CHRIS ELITE IS DONE FOR!
Persephone: Beauty Killer? Nothing beautiful about either of these sluts! What the hell are those two dumb bitches think they are accomplishing pulling this stunt? I just hope this match just ends as fast as possible because I am sick of looking at all this stupidity.
Stew-O: WHAT THE HELL ARE THEY DOING? SIENNA AND KASSIDY SPOT SOLOMON LAYING OFF TO THE SIDE AND THEY BOTH PICK HIM UP AND JUST TOSS HIM ON TOP OF CHRIS! THE JADED HEARTS JUST LEFT THE RING AS THE REFEREE GOES FOR THE COVER! COME ON! NOT THIS WAY! THIS ISN’T FAIR!
ONNNNNNNNNNNEEEEEE!
…
TWWWWWWWWOOOOOO!!
…
THHHHHHHRRRREEEEEEE!!
…
…
…
(DING! DING! DING!)
(“A&D” starts playing again as the Egypt crowd gives off loud and resounding boos as they start to realize what just happened.)
Bella Braxton: Ladies and gentlemen! The winners of this match… AND NEEEEEEEEWWWWWW ELITE ANSWERS WRESTLING UNIFIED TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS! KIRK REDWOOD! SOLOMON STANE! THE OFF BRAND AMPHETAMINES!
Stew-O: Holy shit! What did we just witness? Of course we just witnessed an amazing match between three great teams, but it’s safe to say that the team that was the least likely has done the unlikely and we have new Tag Team Champions. History has been made in Egypt. What an upset!
(Solomon has just slowly rolled off of Chris as Trixie comes back and hands Solomon his half of the Tag Team Titles. Now Kirk slowly rolls into the ring and helps Trixie get Solomon to his feet. Once he’s up, the referee raises the arms in victory of the new Unified Tag Team Champions.)
Gavin Kirkland: Yeah, thanks to Sienna Jade and Kassidy Heart, the biggest rookies in the match walk away with the gold and Showdown still gets NOTHING! THIS SUCKS!
Persephone: Will you shut the fuck up? This is a fucking nightmare. The boozers hold the gold. Oh shit! Does that mean these two morons might be walking into Pain for Pride as the Tag Team Champions? I think I might puke.
Stew-O: Why? You hate all three of these teams, so why should you care? Can’t you be happy that two young stars have finally achieved their first taste of gold in this company. Their work has paid off.
Persephone: Yeah. Hard work. Whatever. But these two are the worst. They are so drunk that they probably won’t remember this moment. But on the bright side, the foggy team and team baldy midget are leaving with nothing.
Stew-O: Of course you would. But this match was an amazing match with so much hard hitting action. Just because of the circumstances surrounding this match doesn’t mean we shouldn’t discount their victory. They showed the world that they can hang with some of the best EAW has to offer and these two young guns just won their first titles in EAW.
Gavin Kirkland: Even though nobody here is on Voltage, we have to give credit to all the teams in this match.
Stew-O: That’s right. They all put their hearts and souls in the hopes that they would walk out with the gold. High Rollerz showed that they most definitely still got it and the Haircare Kings showed why exactly they ruled the tag division for so long. But you have to figure that this is just the beginning of something big. I highly doubt this will be the last time we will see these four teams beat the hell out of each other.
Persephone: Will you two just shut up, damn it? I’m sick of hearing all this happy. As far as I’m concerned, six losers were in this match and two new losers won the titles. Can we just move on with the show?
Stew-O. Of course you would act like this. But regardless. We once again offer our congratulations to Kirk Redwood and Solomon Stane. The Off-Brand Amphetamines are leaving Egypt as the NEW Unified Tag Team Champions.
(The final shot shows Kirk and Solomon celebrating their victory with Trixie at the bottom of the entrance ramp. Jake has slowly rolled into the ring and helping Chris sit up as he hasn’t fully come around yet. Jake has a look of frustration and sullenness due to the fact that their title reign is over before cutting to ringside floor where Jack and David are glaring daggers up to the top of the entrance ramp where their attackers who screwed them out of the Tag Team Titles, Kassidy and Sienna, are standing watching with smirks on their faces at the chaos they caused before the camera cuts elsewhere.)
(Battle of Egypt III: Alexandria Falls, fades into show the next match graphic which flashes across the screen.)
(The camera then goes back to the arena where the shot focuses in to show Bella Braxton who is standing at the center of the ring. She has a smile on her face as she brings her microphone up to her mouth and begins to speak from there.)
Bella Braxton: The following SINGLES MATCH is a bout scheduled for…
Crowd: ONE FALL!!!
(‘Cold War’ by Hans Zimmer begins to blare through the speakers of the arena causing the crowd to erupt into absolutely deafening boos. The camera then goes over to show Drake King beginning to make his way out from the backstage area. He has a disgusted look on his face, mixed in with the slightest of a scowl looking around at the crowd who shower him in a negative reaction. He then looks towards the ring, bowing his head down while he begins to make his way down the ramp.)
Bella Braxton: Introducing first… residing in the Dead Sea… weighing in at 220 pounds… he is… DRAKE THE REDEEMER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Rich Russillo: From one brutal and bloody match to what should be another, Drake King has been a man on a mission these past couple of weeks. Now he sets his sights on one Brian Daniels, someone who he has shown his dissatisfaction for this week. One of his main reasons being the fact that he simply does not like him.
Gavin Kirkland: I wouldn’t be surprised if he was out to end his career here tonight, especially after everything he’s said. But I wouldn’t know, we wrestle on Showdown so evidently that makes us the better brand. 😌
Persephone: Virgin.
(‘Backseat Freestyle’ by Kendrick Lamar then begins to play up following that with the crowd giving a mix of cheers and boos in response. The camera goes over to show Brian Daniels making his way out from the backstage area, more serious than ever as he remains laser focused on the ring. He stands at the center of the stage, not looking at the crowd or anything, instead taking a moment to close his eyes and take a deep breath. From there, he then begins to make his way down the ramp.)
Bella Braxton: And his opponent… from New York City, New York… weighing in at 195 pounds… BRIAN DANIELS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Stew-O: Well from what seemed like a clear road to Pain For Pride for Brian Daniels, now seems to be going nowhere. :lupe: Of course, the news that tonight would be Brian’s last match ever is something that sent shockwaves throughout the entirety of EAW. Especially considering he just competed for the EAW World Championship.
Gavin Kirkland: Well who knows, nonetheless this is the Brian Daniels-
Persephone: THE BRIAN DANIELS PACK WATCH PARTY! YEAHHHH LET’S GOOO! WOOO!!!!!
Stew-O: :whoa: Calm down, nonetheless, we still have to see whether or not he’s going to end his career on a high note… or defeat. Regardless, this is going to be a match that you want to see ladies and gentlemen.
(DING! DING! DING!)
Persephone: The bell has rung, and 40 minutes of excruciating pain has begun in a “match” where two out-of-shape neckbeards do what they call “wrestling”.
Gavin Kirkland: What?! Nobody told me Jake versus Banks was on, I thought that was the main event!
Stew-O: :francis: Anyway, regardless of what my broadcasting partners may think, this is going to be one hell of a match between two legends of the business. Drake King and Brian Daniels, infamous for one reason or the other, clashing tonight, and I don’t think they want to waste much time! Both of them have instantly directed themselves towards the center of the ring, locking horns in a vicious collar-and-elbow tie-up! They begin to jockey for position, with Brian beginning to gain some ground pushing Drake against the ropes! But Drake swings them around 180° before pushing Brian into the turnbuckle padding! He keeps him there, before the referee comes in and barks at them to break it up. Surprisingly clean break coming from Drake and Brian- NEVERMIND! DRAKE SHOVING BRIAN’S FACE! WHAT DISRESPECT!
(Drake treads backward instantly, leaving Brian with his head tilted upward, with contempt on his face in response. With that, it doesn’t help the matter he has to listen to Drake belittling him.)
Drake King: (Off-Mic) You are everything wrong with this godforsaken company!
(Brian begins to approach him and get up in his face, before…)
(SLAP!)
Gavin Kirkland: DRAKE JUST SMACKED THE SHIT OUT OF HIM! He ruffled Brian’s sexy beard, I’m disgusted!
Persephone: Why did they make me commentate with him again…
Drake King: (Off-Mic) You shouldn’t have come back! Now I have to bury you along with your career, and that stupid Strong Style-
Stew-O: BRIAN HAS HEARD ENOUGH! HE NAILS DRAKE WITH A FOREARM SENDING HIM BACK! Drake firmly plants his feet to the mat, ONLY FOR BRIAN TO GRAB HIM AND THROW HIM INTO THE CORNER BEFORE UNLOADING ON HIM WITH RAPID-FIRE KICKS TO THE CHEST! At this moment, Drake has to be regretting pushing Brian’s buttons, and that’s only solidified with Brian grabbing him by his head… BEFORE YANKING HIM OUT OF THE CORNER AND SENDING HIM FLYING THROUGH THE AIR WITH IMMACULATE STRENGTH! Drake is sent tumbling down to the ground and this is the type of energy that Brian said that he was going to come into this match with, a means of venting his anger and letting out all of his aggression as well!
Persephone: Well as long as it makes this match end quicker, fine by me. I simply don’t have time today, if I ever did to begin with…
Gavin Kirkland: Drake slowly begins to rise back up to a kneeling position, while Brian turns around… TAKING A HUGE STEP FORWARD AND CONNECTING WITH A KICK TO THE SIDE OF DRAKE’S HEAD! Despite the impact echoing throughout the arena, Drake narrowly manages to keep himself upright which is something that Brian notices taking a step back… GOING FOR ANOTHER KICK- NO! Drake stops it just in time by grabbing a hold of the right leg! Brian hobbles on one foot, with this giving Drake the opportunity to get back up to his feet, BEFORE PLANTING HIM DOWN TO THE CANVAS WITH A DRAGON SCREW! Drake isn’t done though, continuing to keep a hold of that leg, BEFORE CONNECTING WITH AN ELBOW DROP AGAINST IT!
Stew-O: Drake realizes that the brunt of Brian’s attacks are coming from his legs, with kicks that can knock out an opponent in one fell swoop, which is why he’s found his target and is now going to take advantage of the matter. Drake uses his elbow to dig into the kneecap of Brian, leaving him to scream in pain, BUT BEFORE HE CAN GO ANY FURTHER BRIAN USES THE OPPOSITE LEG TO BOOT HIM AWAY! Drake rolls away quickly, scrambling up to his feet while Brian does the same, LEAPING INTO THE AIR AND GOING FOR A HIGH KNEE TO THE HEAD OF DRAKE- But Drake manages to grab the knee and shove away leaving Brian to stumble back, ALLOWING DRAKE TO SPIN AROUND AND CONNECT WITH A DISCUS ELBOW! The move brings Brian down to a knee, LEAVING HIM IN PRIME POSITION FOR DRAKE TO EXECUTE A SUPERKICK TO THE JAW!
Gavin Kirkland: Brian falls onto his back :mjgrin:, while Drake approaches him and grabs a hold of both his legs- But Brian pushes him away- BUT DRAKE PERSISTS KEEPING A HOLD OF THE RIGHT LEG BEFORE DROPPING DOWN AND WRAPPING HIS LEGS AROUND BRIAN’S LOCKING IN A HEEL HOOK! This is what we should’ve expected! The aggression! The vigor! Drake King knows how to tap into that other side and tear his opponent limb from limb! Brian is screaming in pain, stretching his arms out and trying to pry Drake off of him but his grip is simply too strong right now! He knows that if he lets Drake keep this hold cinched in for long, even if he isn’t going to submit, it’s still going to do some immense damage to that right leg! Brian instead of trying to escape the hold now brings his head upward and stretches his arms towards the bottom rope! Brian seems inches away, AND HE GETS EVEN CLOSER BRINGING HIMSELF UP AND DRIVING HIS ELBOW INTO THE LEG OF DRAKE BEFORE TAKING ONE FINAL BURST AND CLUTCHING ONTO THE BOTTOM ROPE WITH HIS FINGERS!
Referee: (Off-Mic) Alright Drake, release the hold! One! Two! Three! Four-
(Drake, reluctantly, at the count of four lets go of the Heel Hook submission while Brian clutches onto the ropes for dear life. Drake gets back up to his feet, glaring at the referee with disdain on his face, before turning to face Brian once more, who is using the ropes to slowly prop himself up to a vertical base.)
Persephone: He looks like a troll.
Stew-O: Brian leans against the ropes trying to recuperate, but Drake simply is not going to give him that time, beginning to approach him and grab him by the arm before sending him towards the ropes into an Irish whip, waiting for him to rebound… BEFORE RUNNING TOWARDS HIM AND LEAPING INTO THE AIR GOING FOR A SLINGBLADE TO TAKE HIM BACK DOWN TO THE MAT- BUT THAT DOESN’T HAPPEN! Instead, Brian manages to grab a hold of the ropes leaving Drake to stumble forward! BUT THAT DOESN’T STOP DRAKE FROM RUNNING TOWARDS HIM- ONLY FOR BRIAN TO CONNECT WITH A BOOT TO THE FACE USING THE ROPES TO SEND HIM BACKWARD! You can see Brian wincing in pain, Drake certainly did the job targeting that right leg earlier in the match. Drake is stunned for a moment but that doesn’t stop him from continuing to approach Brian, ONLY FOR BRIAN TO SLIP THROUGH AND DRIVE A KNEE STRAIGHT TOWARDS THE ABDOMEN OF DRAKE! Drake slides down to a seated position while Brian turns around and runs to the ropes… CONNECTING WITH A PENALTY KICK TOWARDS THE CHEST OF DRAKE TO FOLLOW UP!
Persephone: By the looks of things that hurt Brian more than it did Drake. :mjlol2: Has he ever heard of the concept of alternating legs?
Gavin Kirkland: In the heat of the moment you gotta do things to keep yourself on your feet. I mean, I can relate, in the bed-
Persephone: SHUT THE FUCK UP AND COMMENTATE YOU STUPID SHIT.
Gavin Kirkland: :whoa: Alright I’m doing it I’m doing it! Brian is back up, grabbing Drake and pressing him up against the turnbuckle padding, BEFORE BEGINNING TO TEE OFF ON HIM WITH KICKS TO THE CHEST JUST LIKE WHAT HAPPENED IN THE BEGINNING OF THIS MATCH! Drake’s chest is beginning to turn beet red, and you have to wonder whether or not that’s a target for Brian in this match in retaliation against what Drake is doing! Brian finally relents, leaving Drake to slide down to a seated position in the corner, a pained expression beginning to become evident on his face. Brian now clutching onto the ropes, BEFORE BEGINNING TO STOMP DOWN REPEATEDLY ON HIS ABDOMEN! If I was in Drake’s position, I’d hurl. 🤢🤢🤢
Persephone: Yeah, because you’re a fucking pussy. But hey, maybe you should be in Drake’s position right now getting the shit beat out of you.
Stew-O: Brian’s assault must’ve been a means of softening him up for something bigger, as he takes a step back and begins to ramp up a running start… LAUNCHING INTO THE AIR AND CONNECTING WITH A HUGE HESITATION DROPKICK TOWARDS THE CHEST OF DRAKE! WHICH CONNECTS! If Brian’s barrage wasn’t enough, that certainly did the trick as he grabs the arm of Drake and drags him towards the center of the ring. BRIAN DROPPING DOWN AND HOOKING THE LEG FOR A PIN ATTEMPT! COULD WE BE SEEING THE BEGINNING OF THE END RIGHT HERE?!
OOONNNEEE!!!
TTTTWWWWOOOO!!!!!
Gavin Kirkland: BUT DRAKE KICKS OUT BEFORE THREE! It’s going to take a lot more than that to take down a former EAW World Champion! Brian is back up to his feet, limping around trying to get some feeling back for sure, who knows how long this match is going to go on for and who knows how much each of them will have to put out there right now. Drake in the meantime is beginning to get himself up to a kneeling position, ONLY FOR BRIAN TO STEP FORWARD AND CONNECT WITH A KICK TO THE CHEST! Drake manages to keep himself upward, BUT BRIAN MAKES SURE TO CONNECT WITH ANOTHER ONE FOR GOOD MEASURE- BUT DRAKE GRABS THE LEG! Drake pushes it away forcing Brian backward… BEFORE DRAKE GOES UNDER AND SWOOPS IN WITH A CHOP BLOCK TO THE RIGHT KNEECAP OF BRIAN DANIELS DROPPING HIM DOWN!
Stew-O: Just when he thinks he’s safe, Drake King reminds Brian Daniels just how malicious he can be in matches like these. Brian is like a wounded animal right now, clutching at that right leg like Drake is ten seconds away from amputating it in the emergency room. But he still pushes on! He still continues! Contrary to what everyone believed would happen, Brian Daniels is still in this matchup! Brian stumbles up to his feet and turns around… ONLY FOR DRAKE TO GRAB HIM AND PULL HIM IN FOR ‘ASCENSION’! THE DOUBLE UNDERHOOK FACEBUSTER CONNECTS TAKING BRIAN DOWN TO THE MAT! BRIAN IS DOWN AS DRAKE ROLLS HIM ONTO HIS BACK AND HOOKS THE LEG GOING FOR A PIN ATTEMPT NOW!
OOONNNEEE!!!
TTTTTWWWWOOOO!!!!!
TTTTTTTHHHHHRRRRRRR-
Persephone: But the King of Strong Style manages to kick out, and unfortunately, this match continues onward.
Gavin Kirkland: Drake doesn’t look all that happy about the fact that this match continues, but that isn’t going to exactly stop him either. Drake is beginning to get back up to his feet, meanwhile Brian is still planted on the ground more focused on getting his bearings rather than lead himself right into Drake’s hands. Brian clutches onto the ropes and leans against them while helping himself up, meanwhile Drake makes his way towards him- BUT BRIAN OUT OF NOWHERE JUST WENT UNDER AND GRABBED DRAKE BEFORE LAUNCHING HIM OVER HIS HEAD AND OVER THE TOP ROPE AND TO THE RINGSIDE AREA!
Stew-O: Drake tumbles down to the ringside area, clutching at his head while using the barricade to get back up to his feet. But I don’t think he sees Brian roll out of the ring and begin to make his way towards him, grabbing him by the head… BEFORE THROWING HIM INTO THE BARRICADE SPINEFIRST! Drake gives a cry of pain instantly shoving away and beginning to retreat, realizing the danger that he’s in right now. But Brian is approaching him once more, grabbing him by the head, BEFORE SLAMMING HIM FACE FIRST AGAINST THE EDGE OF THE APRON THIS TIME! Drake is stunned while Brian keeps a hold of his head, LOOKING TO SLAM HIM AGAINST THE APRON ONE MORE TIME- BUT DRAKE MANAGES TO PLACE HIS HANDS ON THE APRON TO HOLD HIMSELF BACK BEFORE GRABBING BRIAN INSTEAD AND RETURNING THE FAVOR SLAMMING HIS HEAD AGAINST THE APRON INSTEAD!
ONE!
TWO!
THREE!
Persephone: FOURFIVESIXSEVENEIGHTNINETEN! DING! DING! DING!
Gavin Kirkland: The count has begun but I don’t think it’s going to last that long, while Drake might’ve gotten the upper hand then and there, it looks like Brian has other plans connecting with a back elbow towards the chest of Drake! Drake is forced backward but quickly approaches once again- BUT BRIAN GRABS AROUND HIS WAIST AND RUNS HIM FORWARD BRUTALLY PUSHING HIM INTO THE RINGPOST SPINEFIRST!
FOUR!
FIVE!
Stew-O: Brian isn’t done though as he turns Drake around… DRAGON SUPLEX ONTO THE RINGSIDE AREA! DRAKE IS DOWN ONCE AGAIN COURTESY OF ONE OF BRIAN’S BIG MOVES! And while you may think Brian is just going to leave him be and enter back into the ring, that doesn’t look to be the case with Brian approaching Drake and bringing him back up to his feet before looking to roll him back into the ring- BUT DRAKE MANAGES SHOW SOME LIFE AS HE GRABS BRIAN AND THROWS HIM FACE FIRST INTO THE RINGPOST!
(Brian stumbles down to the mat, putting his hand against his head before looking at it and seeing the blood that’s painted on his palm. The impact of the steel to his skull left him with a crimson mask while Drake is seen rolling back into the ring to catch his breath. Drake isn’t exempt from having battle wounds either, somewhere throughout the match a large gash right across the bridge of his nose is seen, and that’s slowly begun to drip down. Drake knew that was the moment he needed to create some distance between the two of them, but Brian isn’t going to let him have that benefit though.)
Gavin Kirkland: Brian slides back into the ring- ‘JUDGEMENT DAY’! DRAKE WITH THE CURB STOMP AS BLOOD SPLATTERS ACROSS THE CANVAS FROM THE HEAD OF BRIAN DANIELS! BRIAN IS OUT COLD AS DRAKE DROPS DOWN AND PINS HIS SHOULDERS TO THE MAT! PIN ATTEMPT! COULD THIS BE THE END OF BRIAN DANIELS’ CAREER RIGHT HERE?!
OOONNNEEE!!!
TTTTWWWWOOOO!!!!!
TTTTTTHHHHHRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!
…
…
…
Stew-O: WAIT! WAIT! THE REFEREE STOPS THE COUNT AND POINTS TOWARDS THE ROPES SHOWING BRIAN WITH HIS FOOT PROPPED UP ONTO IT! DRAKE LOOKS ABSOLUTELY IRATE NOW BUT THERE’S NOTHING HE CAN DO, THIS MATCH CONTINUES HERE TONIGHT!
Persephone: :francis:
(Drake sits up, and looks like he’s about ten seconds away from strangling the referee, but instead, he closes his eyes. He takes a few deep breaths, composing himself, before beginning to get back up to his feet.)
Gavin Kirkland: Drake knows how close he was to winning this one, but Brian continues to persist. The fact that he’s not staying down has to boil Drake’s blood right now especially after everything that he’s put him through in return.
(Drake approaches Brian and grabs him by the hair, beginning to tug him upward with a scowl on his face while Brian’s eyes begin to flutter in response. His eyes look up at the near sadistic expression on the face of Drake King right now, before Drake grabs him by the head and pulls him upward…)
Stew-O: DRAKE GOING FOR ‘OVERHAUL’! SWINGING REVERSE STO TO PLANT BRIAN DOWN TO THE CANVAS!
Gavin Kirkland: BUT BRIAN JUST TURNED IT AROUND AND DROPPED DRAKE TO THE MAT! BRIAN LOCKING IN ‘THE FOURTH SEAL’! OMOPLATA CROSSFACE LOCKED IN OUT OF NOWHERE AND I DON’T THINK DRAKE REALLY EXPECTED THAT TO HAPPEN! DRAKE SCREAMING AT THE TOP OF HIS LUNGS TRYING TO FIND A WAY OUT OF THIS SUBMISSION MANEUVER! HE’S STRETCHING HIS ARMS OUT IMMEDIATELY HOPING TO REACH THE ROPES BUT RIGHT NOW THAT’S PROVING INSUFFICIENT! HE MIGHT JUST HAVE TO TAP OUT TO THE OMOPLATA RIGHT HERE!
Persephone: Unfortunately, Drake is a stubborn man bitch, so as much as you want that to happen I don’t think that is. That makes me sad because that means this match is going to have to unfortunately continue in the process.
Stew-O: Drake’s hands have clenched into fists, no matter how unbearable the pain may be for him at the moment he simply refuses to tap out to the submission! Brian continues to reel back on the head of Drake and push all his weight down on him, but right now I think Drake’s will is beginning to outweigh even that right now! Drake is clawing at the canvas, inching closer and closer towards the ropes! BUT BRIAN RELEASES THE HOLD AND CLUTCHES AT THE ARM OF DRAKE BEFORE PULLING HIM TOWARDS THE CENTER OF THE RING AND PULLING HIM INTO THE OMOPLATA AGAIN!
(For the first time in this match, a look of desperation begins to show on the face of Drake, with Brian continuing to keep ‘The Fourth Seal’ submission hold cinched in tight. He knows for certain that he’s not going to be one to tap out, but if Brian keeps this submission locked in any longer this might result in Drake ultimately passing out due to the excruciating pain. His eyes look around, trying to see if there is anything that can help him out of the situation that he’s in right now. Before long, the sound of the referee asking him if he’s going to tap makes him bat his eyes over towards him.)
Referee: (Off-Mic) DRAKE DO YOU TAP- HEY! HEY! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!
Gavin Kirkland: DRAKE JUST GRABBED THE REFEREE BY THE COLLAR USING HIS FREE HAND! WE SAW THIS HAPPEN AT ODYSSEY 2020 WHEN CHRIS ELITE FACED MR. DEDEDE! NOW IT SEEMS LIKE DRAKE HAS RIPPED A PAGE OUT OF THE CHAIRMAN’S BOOK TRYING TO GET HIMSELF OUT OF THIS GRUESOME SUBMISSION HOLD! THE REFEREE LOOKS ABSOLUTELY DISGUSTED RIGHT NOW AS BLOOD IS SMEARING ALL OVER THE BEAUTIFUL BLACK AND WHITE SHIRT THAT HE HAS ON RIGHT NOW! HE’S TRYING TO GET DRAKE OFF OF HIM BUT WHAT HE DOESN’T REALIZE AS HE’S DOING SO IS THE FACT THAT HE’S INCHING DRAKE CLOSER AND CLOSER TO THE ROPES AND BRIAN SEES THAT AS WELL! NOW THERE’S A LOOK OF DESPERATION ON THE FACE OF BRIAN DANIELS NOW, REALIZING HOW FAR HE’S GONE AND HOW CLOSE HE’S GOTTEN TO VICTORY AT THIS EXACT MOMENT! ALL FOR DRAKE KING TO STOMP ALL OVER IT AND KEEP THIS MATCH GOING! THE REFEREE FINALLY GETS DRAKE TO LET GO! BUT THE DAMAGE MIGHT’VE ALREADY BEEN DONE AS DRAKE REACHES OUT!!!
…
…
…
Persephone: NO!!!
Stew-O: DRAKE CLUTCHES ONTO THE ROPES! DRAKE CLUTCHES ONTO THE ROPES JUST IN TIME AND THIS MATCH CONTINUES!
(Brian is shocked, he immediately lets go of the ropes and makes his way towards the referee, clutching at his collar as he desperately pleads his innocence. Brian is obviously unhappy that he played a part in that and allowed Drake to reach the ropes, but in the end, unnecessary arguing, he realizes, is not going to get him anywhere. He lets go of the referee and turns around, grabbing the head of Drake and bringing him up.)
Gavin Kirkland: Well it looks like that aggression being shown by Brian Daniels only led him into trouble, as that allowed Drake enough time to recover, AND LAUNCH INTO THE AIR CONNECTING WITH A HIGH KNEE! Drake falls back down to a knee again while Brian falls against the ropes, SPINNING AROUND AND GOING FOR A DISCUS LARIAT! But Drake manages to duck under that before running to the ropes… BEFORE GRABBING BRIAN BY THE HEAD AND GOING FOR A TORNADO DDT- BUT BRIAN MANAGES TO LIFT HIM OFF THE GROUND BEFORE SLAMMING HIM BACK DOWN TO THE CANVAS!
Stew-O: Brian jumps up to the top rope- ONLY FOR DRAKE TO SHOOT UP TO HIS FEET AND JOIN HIM! Both of them find themselves in the high rent district and that’s only ever trouble, with Drake and Brian now beginning to absolutely unload on one another with repeated lefts and rights! They’re not willing to give an inch right now especially knowing the type of damage their opposition can do in an elevated position! Drake! Brian! Drake! Brian! Drake! Brian! Drake! Brian! But Drake breaks through the defenses, CONNECTING WITH A HEADBUTT TO THE SKULL OF BRIAN DANIELS! That takes Brian off guard, allowing Drake to slip through and beginning to slam forearm after forearm towards his face to soften him up even more! Possibly so that whatever the hell he has up his sleeve right now works to the utmost efficiency! Drake grabbing Brian into a front facelock, and this definitely isn’t going to be good… DRAKE LIFTING BRIAN UP INTO THE AIR AND DROPPING HIM DOWN INTO A SUPERPLEX OFF OF THE TOP ROPE!
Gavin Kirkland: NO! NOT TODAY! Brian begins to slam repeated punches into the abdomen of Drake trying to get him to release the hold that he has on him before matters become worse! If there’s something I’m sure of, it’s the fact that Drake didn’t expect Brian to turn this around on him so quickly! But that doesn’t mean he’s just going to let it happen, releasing the Superplex position that he has him in before throwing a punch towards his head- But Brian manages to block it just in time! Brian isn’t done though, REELING HIS HEAD BACK AND CONNECTING WITH A HEADBUTT OF HIS OWN TOWARDS HIS SKULL! Brian now pressing his palm against the chest of Drake, BEFORE SHOVING HIM OFF OF THE TOP TURNBUCKLE AND SENDING HIM TUMBLING DOWN TO THE CANVAS!
Stew-O: Drake quickly scrambles up to his feet, and you can see the urgency plastered on his face upon realization that this match has turned back around into Brian’s favor. Drake turns around… ONLY FOR BRIAN TO LEAP INTO THE AIR AND CONNECT WITH A DIVING MISSILE DROPKICK TO THE CHEST OF DRAKE TO DROP HIM DOWN TO THE CANVAS! Drake is hurt right now and Brian looks to take advantage of the matter, getting back up to his feet and turning around waiting for him to do the same. Drake though has been through a lot in this match, so it’s not going to be as easy as anticipated for him as he gets himself up to a kneeling position on the canvas, shifting his body to face Brian…
Gavin Kirkland: BRIAN GOING FOR ‘CAUSTIC ECHO’! SPINNING ROUNDHOUSE KICK TO THE TEMPLE OF DRAKE KING TO FINISH THIS MATCH OFF FOR GOOD!
Persephone: CAUSTIC DEEZ NUTS BITCH!
Stew-O: BUT DRAKE JUST BLOCKED THE KICK WITH HIS FOREARM SENDING A WAVE OF PAIN THROUGH THE LEG OF BRIAN ONCE MORE! Brian is left stumbling backward, dipping down to a knee even unable to keep his balance! BEFORE DRAKE STEPS FORWARD AND CONNECTS WITH A KNEE STRIKE TO THE HEAD OF BRIAN! DRAKE KEEPS BRIAN UP THOUGH AS THIS TIME HE CONNECTS WITH A KICK! BEFORE CONNECTING WITH ANOTHER KNEE! AND ANOTHER KICK! DRAKE NOW JUST ALTERNATING BETWEEN KNEES AND KICKS AS THIS LOOKS ODDLY FAMILIAR ESPECIALLY FOR BRIAN RIGHT NOW!
Gavin Kirkland: BRIAN IS FORCED DOWN TO THE MAT WHILE DRAKE TRANSITIONS OVER TO RAINING DOWN REPEATED STOMPS WHICH DRILL THE HEAD OF BRIAN DANIELS INTO THE CANVAS! THIS IS WHAT BRIAN CALLS THE ‘EYE OF AGAMOTTO’ AND RIGHT NOW DRAKE IS USING IT AGAINST HIM! AND IF WE KNOW WHAT THIS MOVE ENTAILS WE HAVE A CLUE OF WHAT’S UP NEXT FOR BRIAN! DRAKE NOW DROPPING DOWN AND TRAPPING HIS ARMS WITH A CRUCIFIX BEFORE HAMMERING ELBOWS INTO HIM! TALK ABOUT INSULT TO INJURY! DOES THIS MAN HAVE NO SYMPATHY?!
(Drake does not give an inch in this brutal assault, as some members of the crowd are seen looking away in horror. Blood splatters everywhere while the referee practically cowers in the corner, contemplating whether or not it would be in his best interest to step in and put an end to this before this gets out of hand. Ultimately, he does.)
Referee: (Off-Mic) ALRIGHT DRAKE THAT’S ENOUGH! LET HIM GO!
(Drake connects with a few more hard elbow shots towards the head, before surprisingly letting go and stepping back. He wipes the hair from his face, smearing a mix of his and Brian’s blood on his face in the process. The referee drops down and checks on Brian who is unresponsive on the ground before looking back at Drake to make sure that he’s keeping his distance while he does so. The crowd is dead silent at this point, with the only thing being heard a distinguishable mumble from Drake while he presses himself up against the corner, staring at Brian who is being helped up slowly by the official trying to check on him.)
Drake King: (Off-Mic) No, no it’s not…
Stew-O: NO! NO! DRAKE DON’T DO IT!
Persephone: YES! YES! PLEASE DO IT!
Gavin Kirkland: ‘BOOK OF DRISTIANITY’! PUNT KICK CONNECTS AS BLOOD FLIES FROM THE HEAD OF BRIAN DANIELS AND HE DROPS BACK DOWN TO THE MAT!
(The sheer impact of the kick sends Drake falling against the ropes while the crowd’s silence turns to absolutely thunderous boos. The referee begins to berate Drake, yelling at him and practically saying that the damage has already been done… but Drake doesn’t hear that. In fact, it seems that Drake doesn’t hear anything, it goes through one ear and out the other, he simply doesn’t care. He then turns around and drops down, hooking the leg of Brian Daniels while the referee, who looks absolutely disgusted at the matter, hesitantly drops down and begins to count the pin.)
OOONNNEEE!!!
TTTTWWWWOOOO!!!!
TTTTTTHHHHHHRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!
…
…
…
(DING! DING! DING!)
(‘Cold War’ begins to blast through the speakers now with the crowd continuing boo thunderously at the man who’s standing tall at the center of the ring. The camera goes over to show a broken and beaten Drake King pulling himself slowly off of the body of Brian Daniels. He clutches onto the bottom rope and pulls himself towards them, directing himself towards the turnbuckle padding which he uses to prop his battered body up against in a seated position. With blood splattered everywhere from head to toe on his body, his eyes barely manage to stay open. He is just seen instead staring off into the abyss, as once again, Drake King fulfills another mission put forth, and does so with perfection.)
Bella Braxton: Ladies and gentlemen, here is your winner… DRAKE KING!!!
Stew-O: I… wow… What a gruesome scene to end an otherwise great match. Both Elitists gave it their all in this one, with each of them having their own reasons to step into this match and do so. Drake King despises everything about Brian Daniels and desired putting all of this to an end tonight, meanwhile Brian walked into this one knowing that this was going to be his last match, and was going to vent all of his anger out on this very one at the expense of Drake King, and we knew what happened in the very end…
Gavin Kirkland: Now their beautiful hair is dyed a crimson red and one of them might very well be dead! Is this what you sickos do on Voltage??? You maniacs?! God…
Stew-O: Well nonetheless consider this a statement made amidst the Pain For Pride match between Drake King, Minerva, and Myles for the EAW World Championship. Congratulations to Drake, and as for Brian… :lupe:… Congratulations to Drake.
(The camera goes over to see medical officials who have run down to check on Brian, setting up the stretcher so they can lift him out. While that’s happening, Drake simply stares at the scene, a blank and emotionless, yet judgemental, look present on his face. All of that is wiped away in favor of disdain though, as he simply turns around and leaves the ring. The last shot seen is Drake making his way up the ramp, head bowed down ignoring everything that’s happening around him. From there, Battle of Egypt III: Alexandria Falls then begins to fade elsewhere.)
Bella Braxton: Ladies and Gentlemen, the following contest is scheduled FOR!!!
Crowd: ONE FALL!!!
Bella Braxton: And the winner will be one of Voltage’s representatives to fight Cash In The Vault at this year’s PAIN… FOR… PRIDE!!!!!
( “REBOUND!” By JPEGMAFIA (ft. DATPIFFMAFIA) plays throughout the arena as Jay Jerry Johnson slowly walks out to a mix of cheers and boos. The man is laser-focused on the ring in front of him, the crowd reacting to him not phasing him whatsoever showing just how concentrated he is on the task at hand. )
Bella Braxton: INTRODUCING FIRST! Billed from Yokohama, Japan but residing in Chicago, Illinois! Weighing in at 198 pounds. He is The Immortal Exception; JAAAYYYYY JEERRRYYYY JJOOHHHNNNSSOONNNN!!!!!!!
Stew-O: Needless to say this man is on a quest for revenge! His protector got attacked and vanished and the one responsible was his very own tag team partner! Jay has a score to settle and he is looking for blood!
Gavin Kirkland: Let’s not forget the stakes of this match as well! It’s already personal but a spot in Cash in the Vault during Pain for Pride is given to the winner! This oughta be double the motivation for this Johnson!
Persephone: Speaking of his name; Has he ever talked about why he uses the name Johnson and not his real name?
( “Ready To Die” by The Notorious B.I.G. Is next, and Johnson’s out with a mixed reaction himself, flanked by Jay Jerry Johnson, carrying a look of determination in his eyes. )
Bella Braxton: And his opponent! Hailing out of Long Island, New York, weighing in at 210 pounds, accompanied to the ring by Jay Jerry Johnson…HE IS THE WRESTLING MACHINE…LUCAS JOHNSON!!
Stew-O: Here is the mastermi-
Persephone: Don’t even think about using Mastermind and Lucas Johnson in the same sentence.
Stew-O: Well it’s true! It was Lucas who orchestrated the assault on Fitzgerald along with the betrayal of his own tag team partner who he faces tonight!
Gavin Kirkland: Seems like he felt Jay Jerry was not going to help him go where he wants to be so he cut ties before anything else could happen. Lucas has been trying to get his career to take off for a long time and tonight could open the door to what he is looking for should he wins against the other Johnson.
( Ding! Ding! Ding! )
Stew-O: And Here We GO! This triple threat match is officially underway! Let’s not forget folks; The winner of this match becomes one of the Voltage competitors that will be part of this year’s Cash In The Vault match at Pain For Pride so this is more than personal between these two! Both of them are staring at each other in their respective corners, you could cut the tension with a knife and if they had those in their possession it feels as though they would use them on each other!
Persephone: It sure would make that match more interesting.
Stew-O: WAIT A SECOND!!!! JAY JERRY JOHNSON SENDS LUCAS OUT WITH A CLOTHESLINE!!! JAY JERRY JOHNSON BEGINS TO RUN THE ROPES!!!!!
Gavin Kirkland: JAY JERRY JOHNSON JUST LEAPED OVER THE ROPES, OVER THE OFFICIAL, AND ONTO LUCAS TO THE OUTSIDE!!!!! JAY HAD ENOUGH OF LUCAS AND HIS BULLSHIT AND HE LETS HIM KNOW BY THROWING A SLEW OF PUNCHES OVER THE FACE NEAR THE RING APRON UNDER THE CHEERS OF THE CROWD!! Jay Jerry then shoves Lucas into the ring, rolling along with him before standing and waiting for his opponent to get back up.
Stew-O: Lucas is vertical soon after and is getting verbal against Jay Jerry who is trash talking as well. Both meet up at the center of the ring AND THEY BEGIN TO THROW HAYMAKERS AT ONE ANOTHER AND HITTING HARDER AND FASTER AT EACH OTHER UNDER THE CHEERS OF THE CROWD!!! Jay Jerry is getting the upper hand as Lucas is backing himself into the ropes BUT HE DRIVES A KNEE TO TRIPLE J’S MIDSECTION CREATING SEPARATION BETWEEN THE TWO! Jay is holding his head a moment and shakes the cobwebs off before charging at Lucas WHO DUCKS AND WHIPS HIM OUTSIDE OF THE RING! Lucas is still inside the ring moving for a suicide dive BUT JAY DRIVES A HIGH KNEE TO HIS FACE WHILE LUCAS WAS MID FLIGHT!! THAT HAS TO HURT!!
Gavin Kirkland: Jay Jerry isn’t done he in fact just begun as he grabs his opponent by the back of the neck AND WHIPS HIM AGAINST THE BARRICADE NEAR OUR ANNOUNCE TABLE!!! AND HE THEN BEGINS TO SLAM LUCAS’ BACK OF THE HEAD AGAINST THE BARRICADE! TRIPLE J IS LETTING OUT SOME FRUSTRATION HERE TONIGHT! AND HE THEN WHIPS LUCAS AGAINST OUR TABLE!!
Persephone: WHY IS NO ONE LISTENING WHEN I TELL THEM TO STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM OUR GOD DAMN TABLE?!?!?!?!?
Gavin Kirkland: Triple J grabs hold of Lucas’ head BANGING IT ONTO OF OUR TABLE!! And he then whips Lucas into the ring to continue the match to the inside before the official could begin to start counting them out. Lucas rolls on the outside apron just as Jay was getting up in the middle of the ring. Both are up AND LUCAS GUILLOTINES JAY WHO FALLS ON HIS BACK WHILE HOLDING HIS THROAT! Lucas snakes inside the ring throwing fists down on Triple Jay before getting him vertical and whipping him to the ropes AND TRIPLE JAY LANDS A SPINNING HEEL KICK! DOWN GOES LUCAS! JAY WITH A COVER!!
OOONNNEEE!!!
TTTTWWWWOOOO!!!!
Stew-O: And Lucas with the shoulder up after two!
Persephone: As if Lucas was not going to kick following that weak sauce move!
Gavin Kirkland: Lucas retreats against the ropes but that doesn’t stop Jerry from throwing a few kicks while Lucas tries to get to his feet. Lucas is helped up by Jay.
Stew-O: But Lucas throws a quick thumb to the eyes which stops the momentum Jay was gathering just now! He follows it with a series of quick-paced uppercuts until he had Jerry in a corner AND THEN JUMPS UP STRIKING AT TRIPLE J WITH A SHINING WIZARD!!
Gavin Kirkland: That move could shatter skulls if done wrong! Jay Jerry looks in trouble early on in this match as Lucas hoists him up so he could stand straight. A few jabs to the jaw connect on Jay Jerry before he gets whipped into the ropes. Lucas charges forwards SHOULDER TACKLING JAY! Jerry is getting up just as Lucas bounces off the ropes AND CLIPS HIM WITH A CLOTHESLINE!! JAY SPUN BEFORE LANDING ON THE GROUND THAT WAS A BIG RUNNING CLOTHESLINE!!
Stew-O: Lucas always had a high view of himself, let’s see if his actions will allow him to win tonight or if he is punching over his weight class so to speak. Speaking of him he is moving to Jay Jerry, a few kicks to his sides before he brings Triple J back to his feet, AND TAKES HIM DOWN WITH A SWINGING NECK BREAKER! Lucas looks for his options before going up to a turnbuckle standing atop of it quickly BEFORE LEAPING UP INTO A SHOOTING STAR PRESS! AMAZING EXECUTION BY LUCAS WHO LANDS THE MOVE PERFECTLY! HE GOES FOR A COVER!!
OOONNNEEE!!!
TTTTWWWWOOOO!!!!
Persephone: COME ON, WHY IS THIS MATCH STILL GOING?? LOOK AT THEM!!!
Gavin Kirkland: Jay Jerry managed to escape the pin and this match will resume! Lucas stares at the official who points out that this is a two count, not a three, and the veteran Johnson moves to his feet behind Jay Jerry who is on his knees now AND HE LOCKS IN THE COQUINA CLUTCH ON TRIPLE JAY!!! THE SUBMISSION MANOEUVER IS LOCKED IN TIGHT WILL THIS BE THE END OF JAY’S HOPES TO MAKE IT TO CASH IN THE V-NO! HE GRABBED HOLD OF THE NEARBY ROPES!! The official orders Lucas to break the hold which he does!
Stew-O: He indeed does but Lucas grabs at one of Jay’s arm dragging him to the center of the ring, AND LUCAS APPLIES AN ARM TRIANGLE TO HIS OPPONENT!! JERRY’S SCREAMING ENDS UP MUFFLED AS LUCAS TRANSITIONS FROM THE TRIANGLE TO A CROSSFACE!! HE IS LITERALLY OVER JAY AND IS PULLING WITH EVERYTHING HE’S GOT! HE COULD BREAK JERRY’S NECK WAY BUT THE CHARISMATIC ARTIST IS ACTUALLY CLAWING FORWARD AND TOWARDS THE ROPES! HE IS … YES HE IS CARRYING LUCAS ON HIS BACK AND HE MANAGED TO GRAB ON!! HE HAS THE ROPES!! BUT LUCAS KEEPS THE CROSSFACE ON AS THE OFFICIAL COUNTS HIM!!
OOONNNEEE!!!
TTTTWWWWOOOO!!!!
TTTTTHHHHHRRRRREEE!!!!
FFFFFFFOOOOOOOUUUUURRRR!!!!!
Gavin Kirkland: And just before the count of five Lucas let’s go of Jay but how much damage did he get in as a result of this crossface? How will it affect TripleJay from here to match end? The camera is focused on Jay’s pained expression as he is belly first on the ring floor BUT IT DOESN’T SEE LUCAS WHO’S ON THE NEARBY TOP TURNBUCKLE!!! HE LEAPS INTO A FROG SPLASH CRASHING ONTO JEREMY’S BACK!!! HE ROLLS HIM OVER AND GOES FOR A COVER!!
OOONNNEEE!!!
Stew-O: JAY SHOVED A HAND OVER LUCAS’ FACE BREAKING THE COUNT!! Not only is he showing he ain’t done but he has enough arrogance to do it by showing a hand across Lucas’ face which seems to annoy him greatly! Lucas moves to a vertical base, bringing Jay with him as he lifts a leg and drops him with a Gator roll takedown! A few forearms smashes for good measure BEFORE LUCAS GOES FOR THE CHICKEN WING SUBMISSION!! BUT JAY MOVES A FOOT TO THE NEARBY ROPES!!
Gavin Kirkland: Seems evident more and more that Lucas needs to be more mindful of where he performs certain moves and make sure Jay isn’t able to grab or touch the ropes to save himself! AND HE GOES FOR AN ANKLE LOCK SUBMISSION SQUARE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE RING!!! HE HAS THE ANKLE TWISTED AT A NASTY ANGLE AND JAY JERRY IS SCREAMING HIS LUNGS OUT!!!
Stew-O: IS THIS IT FOR JAY JERRY!! HE HAS A HAND RAISED THE HAND IS SHAKING HE’S FIGHTING THE URGE THE INSTINCT TO BE FREE OF THE PAIN! HIS HAND GOES DOWN BUT IT’S TO LIFT HIMSELF OFF THE GROUND WITH BOTH HANDS!! JAY JERRY IS RED IN THE FACE FROM THE PAIN AND HE SUDDENLY TUCKS AND ROLL WHICH FORCES LUCAS TO GET GO OF THE HOLD AND LAND ON THE ROPES!!! LUCAS WAS SO CLOSE TO WINNING THIS ONE! SO DAMN CLOSE as he gets to his feet and turns to look at Jay Jerry who’s standing and begs him to come at him!
Gavin Kirkland: Lucas obliges! Throwing in a clothesline but Jay blocks it trying to go for a superkick but Lucas parries and brings him down with a double leg takedown!! AND THEN HE GOES FOR A TRIANGLE CHOKE!! BUT JERRY ROLLS AND ENDS UP OVER LUCAS AND DRIVES SOME ELBOWS TO THE SIDE OF HIS FACE YET LUCAS DOESN’T LET GO! BOTH MEN ARE GETTING UP! JAY KEEPS THROWING ELBOWS AND LUCAS ENDS UP SENDING HIS OPPONENT OVER HIS HEAD WITH A GERMAN SUPLEX!! Just when you thought Jerry was going to get on the dishing end of this match he is sent back to the receiving end and this time the back of his neck is paying for it!
Stew-O: Lucas doesn’t seem to be done yet but he is taking his time, stalking Jay Jerry BEFORE GOING FOR A BELLY-To-BELLY SUPLEX THAT LANDS HARD ON THE FLOOR! COVE BY LUCAS!
OOONNNEEE!!!
TTTTWWWWOOOO!!!!
Persephone: Nope, there’s another stupid kickout in this stupid match.
Stew-O: But at this pace, if Jay doesn’t find a way to get back into this fight he surely won’t be lasting much longer! Lucas is watching him from a standing position, trying to ‘encourage’ him to get up and he slowly does. Jay is on his knees now, getting smacked in the face and insulted by Lucas but he keeps getting up! He’s Standing! HE SWINGS AT LUCAS BEFORE GOING TO THE ROPES BUT HE GETS TAKEN DOWN WITH LUCAS’ HURRICANRANA!!! WHICH HE FOLLOWS WITH A BOSTON CRAB!!!
Gavin Kirkland: But JAY MANAGES TO GET TO HIS FEET! HE IS PIGGY-BACKING LUCAS ON HIS BACK AND SAMOAN DROPS HIM TO THE GROUND!!! This is an opportunity for Jerry as he is on his knees now holding his back while Lucas is moving to his own knees as well! The two begin to throw down at one another BUT SUDDENLY LUCAS HOPS TO BOTH FEET AND SUPERKICKS JERRY!! HE FOLLOWS IT QUICKLY WITH A MOONSAULT OFF THE SECOND ROPE AND GOES FOR A COVER!!
OOONNNEEE!!!
TTTTWWWWOOOO!!!!
Persephone: And again…
Stew-O: Lucas is denied victory once more as Jay kicks out at two!! Lucas groans, in pain but moves to his feet and drags his opponent up along with him before whipping him to a corner! Jay smacks his back to the corner but begins moving forward! Lucas with a few jabs to his jaw of Jerry and then gets a boot to the gut which allows Lucas to lift him up AND DRILL HIM HEAD FIRST INTO A BRAINBUSTER!!!! This could scramble Jay’s brain right here this could mean serious trouble!
Persephone: Pin him Lucas! Come on finish this so we can do something else for fuck sake!
Gavin Kirkland: Lucas is looking our way, at Persephone but then looks back at Jay Jerry and throws a few kicks to his ribs BUT JAY HANGS ONTO LUCAS’ LEG TRYING TO BRING HIM DOWN BUT LUCAS MANAGES TO FREE HIMSELF! He stumbles into the ropes, Jay makes his way to him throwing punches but Lucas quickly drives a knee to the midsection of Jerry before grabbing his head AND DRIVE IT TO THE MAT INTO A D… T… T!!!!!
Stew-O: Jay is flat on the ground at this point he must be concussed with that DDT and the Brainbuster shortly before that and Lucas doesn’t appear to be done! He grabs Jay by the waist, deadlifting him to his feet before grabbing him a different way and LIFTS HIM UP INTO A GUTWRENCH POWERBOMB!!! This is an opportunity for Lucas to put Jay away but he doesn’t go for a cover!!
Persephone: WHY??!?!?!!?!?
Gavin Kirkland: He clearly has an idea in mind as he makes his way past the ropes and stands on the apron looking in. He has his sights on Jay who’s still on the mat and Lucas thrust himself to the top rope with his arms AND LANDS ATOP OF JAY FOLLOWING A PICTURE PERFECT 450 SPLASH!!! NOW HE GOES FOR THE COVER!!!
OOONNNEEE!!!
TTTTWWWWOOOO!!!!
TTTTTHHHHHRRR-
Gavin Kirkland: JAY JERRY JOHNSON BY SOME MIRACLE LIFTED THE SHOULDER UP JUST BEFORE THE OFFICIAL’S HAND COULD STRIKE THE MAT!!! LUCAS DOESN’T BELIEVE IT!!! WE DON’T EITHER!!! Lucas is looking a bit frustrated as he smacks the mat with a closed fist before moving to get Jay Jerry up!
Stew-O: Lucas throws in a punch but It is evaded by his opponent! Jay Jerry throws in a forearm smash that connects to the side of Lucas’ head! Lucas is reeling while Jay is pressing the offensive forward! Lariat elbow brings Lucas down followed by a snappy rolling elbow smash landing on Lucas! AND JAY WITH A BACK KICK to the gut of his enemy as Lucas now grabs at his stomach in pain! Jerry seems happy but he shrugs it off as he moves to get Lucas back to a vertical base!
Gavin Kirkland: An Irish whip sends Lucas back first into the turnbuckles, Jay moves close, pushing Lucas’ arms to the side clearing the front, AND THROWS IN A STIFF SMACK TO THE CHEST!!
Fans: WOOOOOOO!!!
Gavin Kirkland: Lucas took the full blow of it and looks like it hurts as-
SMACK!!!!
Crowd: WOOOOOOO!!!
Gavin Kirkland: Jay throws another one! Perfectly done the smack is heard all over the arena as then Jerry begins to throw chops and punches in rapid succession finishing it with a headbutt that forces the Wrestling Genius down on his ass AND HERE GOES JAY WITH A HARD MUDHOLE STOMPING WITH A FOOT AND HE IS HELPING HIMSELF WITH THE TOP ROPES TO HIT HARDER!! THE CROWD LOVES IT AS HE IS GOING AT IT LIKE A WILDMAN!! He grabs at Lucas, throwing him into the ropes the man bounces back and HE BRINGS HIM DOWN WITH A SOCCER KICK!!
Stew-O: Lucas is down but he is picked back up quickly, thrown into the ropes, AND TAKEN DOWN ONCE AGAIN WITH A ROUNDHOUSE KICK EXPERTLY DELIVERED BY JAY!! Lucas is down and Jay tries for a cover!
OOONNNEEE!!!
Persephone: Bitch, please…
Stew-O: Not enough! Jerry kicks out before the official smacks the mat for a two-count! Triple J grunts in mild annoyance seeing Lucas is not yet put away then again no one ever lost to a roundhouse kick.
Persephone: Yet!
Gavin Kirkland: The action continues as Jay lifts Lucas up and body slams him harshly down on the ground, he gets him up once again, throwing a few slaps to the chest before going low with a leg sweep which knocks Lucas down. Jay drives an elbow to the spine of Lucas before moving him up and whips him into a corner. He throws in a series of slaps to both sides of Lucas’ face along with some stiff elbows AGAIN AND AGAIN AND AGAIN!! He’s Enraged!!! AND HE FINISHES IT WITH A STANDING DROPKICK THAT HAS LUCAS CRASH DOWN ON HIS ASS! The fans love this!
Stew-O: And so does Jay who smirks looking down on Lucas and then begins to back away slowly just as Lucas crumbles forward landing on his hands and knees. Jay a few steps away, moving his hands forth sizing up Lucas! Are we going to YES WE DO! MY GOD JAY JERRY JUST PUNT-KICKED LUCAS’ HEAD AND THE VETERAN JOHNSON DROPS LIKE DEAD WEIGHT TO THE GROUND! JAY GOES FOR THE COVER!!
OOONNNEEE!!!
TTTTWWWWOOOO!!!!
Persephone: Great, Lucas kicked out again!
Stew-O: Indeed he did! He is showing resiliency tonight which will be required and more if he wants to leave tonight’s event with the chance to participate at Cash in the Vault in Vegas next month! Things are not looking up at the moment but this match isn’t over. Jay goes to a knee and begins to pummel Lucas with strikes to the face until the official orders him to get off his opponent. He goes so reluctantly before looking behind him. He bolts to his feet, running to the ropes he jumps on the second one AND DELIVERS A PERFECTLY EXECUTED ASAI MOONSAULT!! SQUARE ACROSS LUCAS’ CHEST!! Lucas is holding his upper body but Jay doesn’t allow him any respite as he picks him up and whips him hard into a corner. Jay with elbows to the face then sits Lucas on the top turnbuckle.
Gavin Kirkland: What does Jay Jerry have in mind how as he talks smack to Lucas for a few moments. Lucas tries to swing at Jay who ducks by stepping back BUT HE SUDDENLY CHARGES FORTH AND GOES FOR A SPRINGBOARD ENZUIGIRI NAILING LUCAS WHO’S IN AN ELEVATED POSITION!! Lucas crashes down to the ground. Lucas is then picked up and moved to his feet by Jay who taunts him all the while throwing a jab or two square on the button of Lucas! The veteran swings a blind swipe at Jay with force, enough for him to spin and have his back facing Jay WHO LIFTS LUCAS UP IN A TORTURE RACK POSITION BEFORE SPINNING AND DRIVING HIS OPPONENT DOWN WITH A NECK BREAKER!!!
Persephone: Oh look at that arrogant prick now! He’s doing push-ups right next to Lucas! PIN HIM AND FINISH THIS MATCH YOU FUCK!
Stew-O: Jay Jerry Johnson clearly with the upper hand at the moment as Lucas is looking to be in a world of hurt, he is trying to get on his face as Jay Jerry is playing with a crowd that seems to be on his side tonight. Lucas is up, he tries to locate Jay but Jerry moves and spins Lucas around! Kick to the midsection forces the former Lion’s Cup winner to bent forward AND JERRY FLIPS THE MAN OVER!! LUCAS IS UPSIDE DOWN AND JAY DELIVERS AN INVERTED BELLY-TO-BACK SLAM THAT SMUSHES LUCAS FACE FIRST ON THE GROUND!! JAY JERRY WITH A COVER ATTEMPT!!
OOONNNEEE!!!
TTTTWWWWOOOO!!!!
TTTTTHHRR-
Persephone: Really?
Gavin Kirkland: It appears so! Lucas lifts the shoulder up in what looked like a rather arrogant pin from Jay Jerry! He looks at the official, motioning for three but the official confirms his call was a two and he is sticking to it! Jay looks a bit furious but he then stomps to a corner and hops on the top turnbuckle looking down on Lucas yelling at him to get up which he does slowly. What is Jay Jerry going to do? He is waiting for Lucas to be upward and he is! Jay Jerry takes it to the skies going for a diving blockbust-NO WAIT!!! LUCAS REVERSED IT INTO THE BLUEPRINT!! THE CUTTER FROM LUCAS JOHNSON WHO CRAWLS OVER JAY JERRY!! IS THIS HOW THIS MATCH WILL END??
OOONNNEEE!!!
Persephone: Please make it so!
TTTTWWWWOOOO!!!!
Persephone: Please God!
TTTTTHHRR-
Persephone: :will:
Stew-O: What a counter by Lucas Johnson! The desperation maneuver almost paid off something big he was a hair away from making it to Pain for Pride as a Cash in the Vault participant!!! Both men are looking toward the Egyptian skies as neither wants to relinquish the win to his opponent! This is how much they both want to this this is how badly they both want this! Jay Jerry a bit fresher than Lucas is up first with the former New Breed Champion not far behind. Lucas is on his knees now AND GETS TAKEN DOWN BY JAY JERRY WITH A RUNNING LEG LARIAT!! Lucas tries to get back to a vertical base, Jay Jerry helps him up before whipping him to the ropes AND TAKES HIM DOWN WITH A SPINNING URANAGI!!!! DOWN GOES LUCAS AGAIN!
Gavin Kirkland: At this point, you have to wonder what will Jay Jerry need to do in order to keep Lucas down on the mat for three seconds! He’s been dishing punishment upon his opponent for a good while now yet Lucas keeps resisting the offensive drive he is at the receiving end of by his former partner! Lucas is brought to his feet, Jay dashes to the ropes. Lucas attempts a clothesline but it is ducked by Jay WHO CONNECTS A FOREARM TO LUCAS’ FACE WITH A LEAPING FOREARM SMASH! DOWN GOES LUCAS ONCE MORE! Lucas is getting dragged to the center of the ring and then Jay Jerry goes to a corner, he is looking to go airborne AND HE LEAPS HIGH INTO THE AIR WITH A SENTON B-BOMB THAT IS EVADED BY LUCAS!!! LUCAS ROLLED OUT OF THE WAY AND JAY JERRY CRASHED AFTER HAVING GONE WITH GREAT ELEVATION WITH THE MOVE!!
Stew-O: This is an opportunity for Lucas to gain the upper hand in his match as he is trying to move to his feet while staring at Jay who’s down on the floor holding his stomach. Jay is slowly going to his knees as Lucas is waiting for him to be fully up, he’s on the opposite corner seems obvious he will try for The Lightswitch on Jay this could be a turning moment in this match folks! He is calling for it with his fingers!!!
Crowd: THREE!!! TWO!! ONE!
Stew-O: Lucas charges at Jerry WHO SPEARS LUCAS!!! THE SPEAR BY JAY TAKES DOWN LUCAS!!! JAY HOOKS THE LEGS!!!
OOONNNEEE!!!
TTTTWWWWOOOO!!!!
TTTTTHHRR-
Persephone: HOW DOES HE FUCKING EVEN????
Stew-O: Somehow, someway, Lucas managed to KICK OUT of that thunderous spear!!! Un-BELIEVABLE!!!
Gavin Kirkland: Both men are giving an amazing performance here for us tonight it’s hard to say who will emerge victorious after all that we’ve seen so far! Jay Jerry looks a bit exhausted, and so does Lucas who’s looking forced for wear as he is getting picked up by Jay Jerry BUT LUCAS GETS A KNEE TO JAY’S GUT! HE SETS HIM UP FOR THE KILLSWITCH!! THE SKULL-CRUSHING FIN-NO!!!!! JAY JERRY COUNTERED WITH LUCAS’ OWN BLUEPRINT!!! HE USED THE SIGNATURE CUTTER ON LUCAS!!! LUCAS LOOKS DOWN AND OUT!!!
Jay Jerry Johnson: (off-mic) THIS IS FOR FITZ YOU BITCH!!!
Gavin Kirkland: JAY JERRY PICKS UP LUCAS AND FLIPS HIM UPSIDE DOWN BEFORE DRIVING HIM DOWN WITH THE ALT-F4!!!!!!! JAY’S PATENTED DRIVER CRUSHES LUCAS TO DOWN TO THE GROUND!!!
Stew-O: Jay Jerry Johnson for The Cover! PERHAPS THE WIN!!
OOONNNEEE!!!
TTTTWWWWOOOO!!!!
TTTTTHHHHHRRRRREEE!!!!
( DING! DING!! DING!!! )
Bella Braxton: Ladies And Gentlemen The Winner Of This Bout AND CASH IN THE VAULT PARTICIPANT: JERRY… JAY… JOHNSON !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Stew-O: WHAT A SPECTACULAR ENDING TO A SPECTACULAR MATCH!!! THESE TWO JOHNSONS GAVE ALL OF THEMSELVES FOR THE SAKE OF REVENGE AND VALIDATION!! AND NOW JAY JERRY JOHNSON HAS A TICKET FOR CASH IN THE VAULT AS ONE OF THE VOLTAGE REPRESENTATIVES DURING PAIN FOR PRIDE!!!!
Gavin Kirkland: Lucas showed us that he wanted this opportunity just as much as his former partner but tonight was not meant to be! An incredible effort by the Wrestling Machine which will not be forgotten but tonight the win was not meant to be! Lucas did good, very good even but Jay Jerry Johnson did a bit better and the win ended up to his name!
( “REBOUND!” By JPEGMAFIA (ft. DATPIFFMAFIA) plays throughout the stadium as Jay Jerry Johnson is getting his lead arm raised in victory by the official. The camera pans down to Lucas who is rolling to the outside of the ring, obviously deflated by the loss. As Jay Jerry Johnson continues to celebrate his victory, Battle of Egypt fades away from ringside.)
(We cut to the back where Kyra Phillips is standing by microphone ready for her interview.)
Kyra Phillips: What a raucous night it has been so far, and with still so much to come. However, right now I have with me none other than the legendary former World Champion, Cameron Ella Ava.
(The camera pans out a little to reveal Cameron, a huge roar heard from the capacity crowd. This reaction makes Cameron smile, and she nods her head appreciatively.)
Kyra Phillips: One of the loudest reactions of the night thus far Cameron. That must feel good.
(Cameron turns to face Kyra, already nodding her head and answering.)
Cameron Ella Ava: Of course. It goes without saying that the EAW fans are the very best in the world, and they appreciate talent when they see it.
Kyra Phillips: And a lot of love in the room for you?
Cameron Ella Ava: I don’t know, you’d have to ask them that. What I will say is that I have always enjoyed performing in this country and having the opportunity to show what we can do in the ring. It still gives me goosebumps all down my back, recalling last year when we were here, and I was fighting Darcy May Morgan for the Universal Women’s Championship. Darcy and I put on a show that evening, one that I will forever remember, and I’m sure these fans do too. It was an absolute honor to be able to represent women in this part of the world, whilst at the same time giving something back for their support. They don’t get to see us as often as they probably would like, so it’s up to us that whenever we are in Egypt, we do the absolute best that we can.
Kyra Phillips: So, I’m sure you have a lot of interest in the match that will decide the Number One Contendership to the Universal Women’s Championship tonight?
(A smirk forms on Cameron’s face, a mischievous grin even.)
Cameron Ella Ava: Honestly Kyra, I am so proud of what the EAW is doing, putting the Championship on a pedestal in exactly the way it should be. There are many amazing matches on the card tonight, but quite rightly the six women involved in that Ladder Match are going to go all out to steal the show, so that they can face Andrea at Pain for Pride. I might be disappointed that I didn’t become champion at Grand Rampage, but I’m still keeping a close eye on what happens.
Kyra Phillips: So you’d still like to become Champion?
Cameron Ella Ava: Of course, but I am more than aware that there is a hungry Doctor waiting in the wings for her chance, and sooner or later whoever heads out of Pain for Pride with the title is going to have to deal with her. It’s an exciting time for the Women’s divisions with a level of talent that is truly off the chart. I’m going to do all that I can to ensure that one day very soon, I am the standard for the division. And once again have a championship strap around my waist.
Kyra Phillips: So, all that said, who is your pick to walk away tonight with that opportunity. Who does Cameron Ella Ava see climbing that ladder to success?
(Cameron puffs out her cheeks, looking unsure as to her opinion.)
Cameron Ella Ava: It might sound like I am sitting on the fence, but truthfully, I don’t know. Every single woman in that match has claims to that contendership, and it is just too hard, too close to call. I don’t see an underdog or a favorite, the fact is they ALL have a chance to win. The best advice I can give is that we all just sit back and enjoy the ride, knowing that whoever wins will be one heck of an opponent for the Champion, and that we will be guaranteed one of the best Universal Women’s Championship matches of all time.
Kyra Phillips: Of course, that Ladder match isn’t the only match on the card, and right here in Egypt the main event see’s Answers World Champion TLA, fresh off what seems like a multitude of defenses in a short space of time, face Theron Nikolas who has been eager for this opportunity for some time. Care to give your prediction for this one?
(Cameron tilts her head slightly to one side, obviously giving the question some thought.)
Cameron Ella Ava: Well, as everyone knows, TLA is a friend of mine, and I am so proud of all that he has achieved of late. However, Theron is obviously a legend around here, and should always be treated with respect for everything that he has achieved. They both deserve this moment, and I’m really looking forward to this match, but Theron is…
(Theron Nikolas pushes past Kyra and into shot, the crowd greeting him with a chorus of boos. Cameron backs off a little, looking shocked by the interruption and more than a little unnerved by his demeanor. Theron is dressed ready for battle tonight and looks incredibly focused on what he needs to do.)
Theron Nikolas: I expected better of you Cameron, and yet here you are, just being like everyone else and sharing their flawed opinions.
Cameron Ella Ava: I…
Theron Nikolas: Don’t try and deny it, you’re counting me out tonight and don’t believe for one second that I can beat TLA tonight and go on to face Impact in the Main Event at Pain for Pride. And you know what, that’s fine, but there are going to be a lot of disappointed people. I used to think you were OK, but just recently I’ve lost a ton of respect for you, because you’re just like the other sheep, a talking piece for the company. It’s pathetic Cameron, and just like them, I’m going to make you eat your words.
(Cameron can’t believe this verbal assault, especially as she’d never said such a thing.)
Theron Nikolas: Tonight, I’m going to take Hawk’s script, rip it up and rewrite it in front of the world… while once again becoming the Answers World Champion. And you, nor anyone else can do a damn thing about it.
(Theron stares at her for a moment, before leaning in closer.)
Theron Nikolas: Cunt.
(Theron walks away, Cameron completely speechless and stunned by what had just happened. She looks at Kyra who is also lost for words, as the scene cuts.)
(Battle of Egypt III: Alexandria Falls is seen fading in as another shot of the backstage area is seen. The crowd is then seen roaring in approval upon seeing Alex Myers make their way towards Gorilla Position, getting ready for their match for the New Breed Championship. They looked as focused as ever, looking to finally end their journey. They walk through Gorilla Position, and as they are about to walk through the curtain..they are stopped. As Alex turns around, they are greeted by a very familiar face..)
ARIA: Alex…
Alex Myers: …What are you doing here-
(ARIA would immediately cut off Alex..as she embraces them with a hug. Alex, confused on what to do, just let it happen..as they even hug her back. They just embrace for a few moments, before breaking the hug. ARIA would then reach over, grabbing a Notebook-like object..revealing the Journal that Alex had given to her.)
ARIA: I-..I just wanted to show you something.
Alex Myers: Huh?
(ARIA would then open up the Journal, and begin to flip through the Pages. She eventually stops on one, and slowly turns the Journal for Alex to see, and in the Journal, it states..)
(“Become the New Breed Savior.” – Alex Myers, August 2021.)
(All Alex could do is crack a very vague smile, as ARIA looks up at them, and gives them a nod of approval.)
ARIA: I believe in you, Alex. Go win that New Breed Championship.
(Alex’s smile grows even wilder, as ARIA once again embraces Alex with a hug. Alex pats ARIA on the back a few times, before breaking up the hug as they walk over to the curtain..)
Alex Myers: I will..thank you.
ARIA: And one more thing…remember that the change was worth it.
(Alex Myers would nod at ARIA, before taking a deep breath, grabbing their Skateboard, and putting their hood up as they would walk through the curtain.)
(The camera cuts to Stephie Love in the ring.)
Stephie Love: The following contest is scheduled for…
Crowd: ONE FALL!!!
Stephie Love: Introducing first..
( ‘End of Heartache’ by Killswitch Engage hits!!!!)
Stephie Love: The challenger! They are “The Unknown Joker” ALEXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX MYERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!
(The crowd begins to cheer loudly as ‘The Unknown Joker’ Alex Myers makes their way to the ring on a skateboard. Alex has their entire face painted in preparation for this championship match. Alex takes a seat in the corner waiting for their opponent to arrive.)
Stew-O: Alex Myers has been on a determined path to win the EAW New Breed Championship from Jon Kelton and that is not going to be an easy task whatsoever. Alex’s goal is to elevate the prestige of the New Breed Championship and has even claimed to be the Savior of the New Breed division.
Gavin Kirkland: Does that mean that Jon Kelton is holding the New Breed division back? He seems to be a pretty good champion to me. Not to mention Londyn :whew:
Persephone: Well if Alex can win this match quickly then I will definitely have more respect for them. They can save this division by saving me from having to watch it. 💯
Stew-O: If Alex Myers wins the championship they will put their money where their mouth is. If Alex thinks they can save this division and make it thrive under their leadership then by all means that is what EAW is about. Step up to the plate and change this place for the better.
( ‘Heart-Shaped Box’ by Nirvana hits!!! )
Stephie Love: And their opponent from Toronto, Ontario, Canada weighing in at 208 pounds they are “The Chosen One” JEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEON KELTONNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(Jon Kelton makes his way to the ring as he stomps down hard on Alex Myers’ skateboard breaking it in disrespect before entering the ring. The crowd gives off a mixed reaction not pleased with the disrespect. Kelton is shown making out with his valet/manager/girlfriend Londyn Zelaya in the ring as Alex Myers watches on.)
Gavin Kirkland: Damn the shots fired. But Alex Myers is not responding at all as they just sit motionlessly in the corner waiting for the match to begin. But damn leave her alone! She’s mine!
Persephone: Unlike me and Rex Gavin will be forever alone. You hate to see it.
Stew-O: I’m not even sure why she’s out here. Alex Myers had the good sense to not bring ARIA out here after we saw them backstage together. But I guess Jon Kelton needs that moral support. She has been at his side from day one and I can respect that. They are a team!
Gavin Kirkland: True. But this is a Handicap Match. Maybe I should take her back to safety in my dressing room backstage. It’s not really a room actually. More like a basement but I’m sure she will be safe there.
Stew-O: Nah you are staying here. We already had the officers investigate that place earlier and clear it out.
Gavin Kirkland: YOU WHAT?!?!?
Persephone: Now it is officially time for the worst part of the night. Where the match begins. :scusthov:
(DING! DING! DING!)
Persephone: And the match is over!!! DING! DING! DING!
Stew-O: Nice try, it is just starting actually.
Persephone: :noah: !
Gavin Kirkland: A mixed reaction from the crowd who is split evenly it seems between both of these competitors. Could we be witnessing a new champion tonight? Or will Jon Kelton’s reign continue?!?! Kelton plays to the crowd showing off his confidence as Alex Myers just glares intently from across the ring. Myers waits patiently as they crouch into a grappling position looking to lock up with Kelton. It looks like Myers does not want to waste any time and is one hundred percent focused on the wrestling aspect here. Kelton’s overconfidence may be his undoing if Myers is truly as prepared for this match as they seem to be. The intensity is off the charts as the crowd is on their feet for this one they feel that change could be in the air here tonight in Egypt.
Persephone: Ideally they would change the game by ending the match early. However, it looks like Jon Kelton is noticing Alex Myers intensity and Kelton is not backing down. Kelton now looks more serious as he goes to lock up with Myers and may be falling into their trap. And just as expected Myers charges Kelton back throwing him back first into the corner with a hard shove while grappling aggressively in the ring. Kelton gets up in the ropes and the referee now forces the break but the referee should also force the match to end. Just disqualify him.
Stew-O: That’s not how it works and you know it. Jon Kelton tries to get a thumb to the eye on Alex Myers as they break the grapple. But Myers is too quick and they jump backwards across the ring to avoid the cheap shot as Kelton smirks across the ring completely unashamed of his actions. Myers not letting Kelton get them heated however as they maintain their composure looking to get right back on up into the action. Myers stalks forward right back into a grapp-
Gavin Kirkland: No! Alex Myers ducks behind Jon Kelton going for a German Suplex! But Kelton manages to sandbag and falls down on their legs as Myers tries to maintain control. But Myers grabs the leg of Kelton trying to flip them over only for Kelton to leap over Myers’ arm. Kelton grabs on top of Myers tackling them to the ground maintaining control of the match using his weight to press down on Myers keeping them trapped beneath. Myers quickly transitions into the Dawn of Torment!!!-
Persephone: No! Jon Kelton quickly drags himself across the ring desperately grabbing for the ropes which he manages to reach dragging Alex Myers along with him. Myers has their arms wrapped tightly around the legs of Kelton but the referee demands a break immediately counting to five to force the break.
Referee: ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! FIVE! Enough!
(The referee points menacingly towards the ring bell as Alex Myers releases Jon Kelton from their grasp.)
Stew-O: Jon Kelton kicks Alex Myers away from him as he holds onto the ropes and drags himself into a corner in a seated position to catch his breath. Kelton with a look of rage on his face as you can see him suddenly realize the challenge imposed on him tonight. Myers backs off with a cold look in their eye as it may have just set in for Kelton that this is going to be a hard fight. Kelton leans back before kipping up in a show of athleticism, the smirk gone from his face as he prepares for his next move against Myers. Myers advances once more as Kelton almost looks apprehensive to lock up again.
Gavin Kirkland: But Jon Kelton does indeed lock up again with Alex Myers and quickly manages to transition into a side headlock. Myers tries to throw Kelton off of them by hitting the ropes but Kelton drags Myers down to the mat still holding the headlock as Kelton really wrenches on that neck transitioning into a Sleeper Hold from behind. Time for Myers to say goodnight!
Persephone: No! Alex Myers pushes themselves back up and gores Jon Kelton back into the corner but Kelton still maintains the headlock. Kelton in the ropes as the referee demands a break once again and Kelton showing great ring awareness as he seems to realize that Myers has a strategy in mind to end his reign and Kelton is not going to allow that to happen. Myers angrily breaks up once again storming across the ring and Myers looks like they are about to lose their cool. Myers visibly annoyed by Kelton’s mind games in the early goings of this contest. Myers slaps themselves in the head as they psych themselves back up to get back into gear.
Stew-O: What an unhinged lunatic. Jon Kelton now looking to lock up with Alex Myers once again. But Myers with immense speed tackles the leg of Kelton taking him down to the mat slamming him hard backwards on the back of his neck. Kelton with a bad fall there but Myers going for the leg and possibly a submission once again only for Kelton to worm his way back to the ropes. Myers slams Kelton’s legs down repeatedly in frustration against the mat before backing away. As soon as Myers gets a move in on Kelton the champion just worms his way into the ropes and they are losing it. Myers screaming at Kelton to fight them and advances forwards but Kelton holds onto the ropes kicking Myers away.
Gavin Kirkland: Jon Kelton rolls out to the apron as Alex Myers advances punching him in the face. Alex hooks the arm as they look to Suplex Kelton back into the ring. No! Kelton manages to pull himself back down to the apron and punches Alex in the face in revenge! But Alex retaliates with a series of hard forearms nearly knocking Kelton off the apron! But Alex grabs the arm of Kelton and pulls him forward… Suplex into the ring as Alex goes back first into the ring mat! Kelton now with a big chance to take control of this match as he awaits Alex getting back up in the ring. The New Breed Champion has his prey in sight!
Persephone: Alex Myers back up… they duck beneath a Superkick from Jon Kelton! Alex kicks Kelton hard in the gut before grabbing the arm and whirling Kelton around in a complete 360 degree motion before whipping him at high speed into the corner. Kelton goes back first and falls forward on his face from the impact of that whip. Smartly now Kelton rolls out of the ring to the outside to catch his breath. Eventually Kelton returns to the ring-
Stew-O: But Alex Myers is waiting for him! Charging Clothesline! But Jon Kelton ducks beneath! Kelton with a Superkick to the face of Alex nearly knocking them the fuck out! Alex falls forwards but Kelton moves out of the way and Alex flops to the mat. Kelton hoists himself up on the middle ropes and dives off as Alex gets back up… FLYING CROSSBODY THROUGH THE AIR!!!!!
Gavin Kirkland: But Alex Myers catches Jon Kelton in midair and spins him around with a Spinning Side Slam right down to the mat! Alex with the first cover of this match as they look to put Kelton away and become the NEW New Breed Champion!!! What a high impact maneuver!!!
Referee: ONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNEEE!!!!!!!!!!!
Referee: TWOOOWWWWWOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
Referee: TTTTTTHHHHHHRRRRRREEEEEEEEE—
Persephone: Jon Kelton kicks out before three! Alex Myers staying focused now as they don’t want to lose control of the match and deep down he probably knew that wouldn’t be enough to win the championship. There is more work to be done and Alex is right back on the attack. Kelton crawls away from Alex beneath the bottom rope but Alex stomps hard on his hand preventing Kelton from leaving! Alex drags Kelton back into the ring as Kelton shoves them away pulling himself up on the ropes! Kelton charges in but Myers ducks the clothesline! Alex leaps and connects with a Cutter driving Kelton face first into the ring mat! Myers has had enough of Kelton’s mind games and dodging tactics and they are looking to make sure there is no escape for the champion when it comes to the punishment they are here to dish out!
Stew-O: Jon Kelton lying motionless in the ring now as Alex Myers takes in the response from the crowd. Myers taking a quick breather in control of this match as they soak in the energy of the Egyptian fans before signaling to the crowd! Myers possibly has some move in mind to end things here and get that championship around their wais-
Gavin Kirkland: But that move will have to wait until later as Jon Kelton rolls out of the ring! But Alex Myers not letting him go as they are in pursuit of Kelton outside the ring and grabbing the hair of the New Breed Champion! Kelton turns around with a Superkick but Alex dodges it! Alex with a Bicycle Kick to the face drops Kelton who collapses motionless on the floor. Myers just kicked Kelton’s head clean off!!! Myers not done either as they bash Kelton’s head repeatedly into the steel steps before realizing the referee is counting! Myers tosses the motionless Kelton back into the ring and goes for the cover! Could that severe head bashing cause enough trauma to put Kelton away???
Referee: ONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNEEE!!!!!!!!!!!
Referee: TWOOOWWWWWOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
Referee: TTTTTTHHHHHHRRRRRREEEEEEEEE—
Persephone: Jon Kelton kicks out! It looks like the head trauma was not enough to put him away! Alex Myers immediately back up as they stomp angrily on Kelton as if to punish him for daring to kick out. Myers shouting something that I am sure is not very nice but also we can’t really hear it very well at their opponent. Myers taunting Kelton here while enjoying this moment of dominance in this match. Kelton managed to avoid their wrath for awhile but now Alex is in full control and the New Breed Champion is going to have to find a way to turn this around or we are going to get a new champion here before you know it. Kelton can only take so much damage and he is taking about fifty stomps to his body right now from Alex. Alex drags Kelton up to his feet. They grab the hair of Kelton and toss him across the ring like a ragdoll. Kelton in a sad state as Myers yanks the leg of Kelton back into the middle of the ring!
Stew-O: Alex Myers now stomping on the leg of Jon Kelton preventing him from getting back up. And a hard boot from Alex as they stomp right on the nose of Kelton busting him wide open. Alex breaking one of the fragile bones inside Kelton’s nose and showing no mercy as they kick the face of Kelton again and again with their boot. Alex grabbing Kelton’s leg as it looks like they intend to lock in the Dawn of Torment and get it in this time officially! No remorse whatsoever from Myers as Kelton tries to squirm away and not get stuck in the hold. Myers drops their elbow down across the knee of Kelton before climbing on top of the champion. Myers now raining down punches over and over taking out that frustration on Kelton here tonight! Kelton’s face being beaten into a bloody pulp and the referee may have to stop this as Kelton is really being battered and this could cause serious permanent brain damage at this rate.
Gavin Kirkland: Alex Myers moving slowly as they slap the back of Jon Kelton’s head toying with him. Alex wrenches the arm of Kelton dragging him up to his feet and twisting the arm all the way around. Alex twists the arm all the way to the back of Kelton’s head but Kelton grabbing the leg of Alex and lifting them up high in the air! Alex drops back down! But wait Londyn is up on the apron! Londyn is giving Alex the finger as they are distracted! Kelton grabs the leg of Alex and throws them back with a Back Drop right onto the top of their head! Alex gets back up holding their head in pain as Kelton grabs them and tosses them between the middle ropes to the outside. Look at Londyn looking all proud of herself! Get her out of here she is interfering! And by get her out of here I mean get her up to my hotel room. Daddy will be coming later. Sorry Kelton it’s time she learns what a REAL man is like! :mjlit:
Persephone: Gross. How have you not been cancelled or sued into oblivion for sexual harassment? EAW should be ashamed for leaving you on the air for all of these years. And speaking of years that is how long this match feels like it has been going on. And now they are fighting outside the ring which is a place they can’t even end the match. Well maybe the referee will just count them both out and we can all go home. Just start the countout for the next match too immediately after the bell rings for this match too. Just count quickly so they can’t make their entrances in time.
Referee: ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! FIVE! SIX! SEVEN! EIGHT! NINE! TE-
Stew-O: But both Alex Myers and Jon Kelton jump back up into the ring in time! Wait no Alex Myers rolled back out to get a breather as the count starts up again! But here comes Kelton! KELTON FLIPPING OVER THE TOP ROPE!!! TOPE CON GIRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Gavin Kirkland: Jon Kelton with no fucks given as he takes out Alex Myers on the outside! Kelton grabs the head of Myers and repeatedly bashes their skull into the barricade at ringside before tossing them back on up into the ring. Kelton with the cover!!!
Referee: ONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNEEE!!!!!!!!!!!
Referee: TWOOOWWWWWOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
Referee: TTTTTTHHHHHHRRRRRREEEEEEEEE—
Persephone: Alex Myers kicks out! Jon Kelton is appalled and has had enough! Kelton with a hard bitch slap to the face of Alex! He really just slapped the shit out of him! And another one!
Jon Kelton: https://i.imgur.com/6V6HKmll.jpg
Stew-O: Jon Kelton is slapping away at Alex Myers who is just being beaten and battered by these high speed bitch slaps. Kelton is ruthless with them slaps as he puts palms to face. Myers can’t seem to find any way to avoid them.
Jon Kelton: (Off-Mic) Who betta than Kelton?
Gavin Kirkland: You can literally see the palm marks on the face of Alex Myers as Jon Kelton continues to repeatedly bitch slap the shit out of him. Myers slowly gets back up but Kelton now with a spinning motion as he moves towards Alex to slap him again.
Persephone: SPINNING SLAP TO THE FACE!!! ALEX MYERS COLLAPSES TO THE GROUND MOTIONLESS! THEY HAVE JUST BEEN KNOCKED UNCONSCIOUS BY THE FORCE OF THAT BITCH SLAP! KELTON WITH THE COVER!!!
Referee: ONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNEEE!!!!!!!!!!!
Referee: TWOOOWWWWWOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
Referee: TTTTTTHHHHHHRRRRRREEEEEEEEE—
Stew-O: Alex Myers survives! I’m not sure how they survived that onslaught of bitch slaps! Jon Kelton is dumbfounded he thought he had the title retained and the match won!
(Alex Myers stands up and throws several punches at Jon Kelton knocking them backwards.)
Gavin Kirkland: :eek:h: !
Persephone: Dammit I thought they were about to lose the match. :noah:
Stew-O: Alex Myers with the will to keep fighting here! Alex won’t back away regardless of the odds regardless of Londyn’s interference!
Crowd: ALEX! ALEX! ALEX!
Gavin Kirkland: Alex Myers continues to throw punches at Jon Kelton seemingly not showing any reaction to the crowd getting behind them but deep down you know that it has to be fueling them! This sudden burst of energy, how else could you explain it!
Persephone: But the backhand slap to the face from Jon Kelton staggers Alex Myers back! No! They manage to stay on their feet. Alex charges forward with a barrage of hard forearms to the face, splattering blood from Kelton’s nose all over the ring! Kelton goes flying out of the ring to the outside! What is Alex doing now?!?!?!
Stew-O: ALEX MYERS CHARGES ACROSS THE RING LEAPING UP TO THE MIDDLE ROPE AND THEN LEAPING UP TO THE TOP ROPE!!! ALEX STOPS FOR A SECOND TO SOAK IN THE CROWD WHO IS ALL CHEERING AND ALL ON THEIR FEET!!!
Alex Myers: BEHOLD THE NEW BREED SAVIOR!!! :blessed: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(Jon Kelton is shown staggering around ringside before collapsing on the Egyptian commentary table.)
Gavin Kirkland: ALEX MYERS OFF THE TOP ROPE!!! FLYING LEG DROP FROM THE TOP ROPE TO THE OUTSIDE!!!! BAH GAWD ALMIGHTY ALEX JUST CRASHED DOWN ON KELTON AND THE ENTIRE COMMENTARY TABLE EXPLODED! PIECES FROM THE TABLE WENT FLYING EVERYWHERE!!!
Persephone: Eeew it got in my hair! What the hell is that table even made of?!?!? Why is there an Egyptian commentary table is that even an actual language?
Stew-O: We may never know now that it has been destroyed. The commentators are deceased and will never be seen again. But somehow in the rubble Alex Myers is still moving.
Referee: :francis:
Gavin Kirkland: The referee is sick of this shit. The count out has begun!
Persephone: Good good.
Referee: ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! FIVE!!!
Stew-O: Alex Myers is slowly returning to their feet! Alex making their way towards the ring!!
Referee: SIX! SEVEN! EIGHT!
Gavin Kirkland: But Alex Myers realizes that they can’t win the title via count out! Alex grabs Jon Kelton and is dragging him back to the ring! Kelton sandbagging and not making it easy for Alex as Kelton may be deceased here tonight!!!
Referee: NINE!!!
Persephone: Alex Myers shoves Jon Kelton back into the ring just in time to defeat the ten count!
Referee: TEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Stew-O: FUCK ALEX MYERS HAS BEEN COUNTED OUT! JON KELTON WINS AND RETAINS THE TITLE!!!
Persephone: DING! DING! DING!
Gavin Kirkland: NO! Alex Myers jumped in themself at the last millisecond! The match continues!
Persephone: https://www.reactiongifs.com/wp-content/gallery/no/angry-no.gif
Stew-O: Alex Myers throws their arm over Jon Kelton for the cover!
Referee: ONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNEEE!!!!!!!!!!!
Referee: TWOOOWWWWWOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
Referee: TTTTTTHHHHHHRRRRRREEEEEEEEE—
Gavin Kirkland: But Londyn places Jon Kelton’s leg on the ropes!
Alex Myers: :comeagain:
Persephone: Damn she cheated. Guess this will have to end in a disqualification. Too bad the referee saw her.
Referee: OUT! OUT! OUT!
Stew-O: The referee is ejecting Londyn from ringside! She is livid and kicking things! But she has no choice but to leave.
Jon Kelton: (Off-Mic) Get your ass back here.
Gavin Kirkland: She has no choice but to leave despite whatever Jon Kelton may want! He is now all alone with Alex Myers! Alex mocking Londyn as she heads backstag-
Persephone: WAIT JON KELTON FROM BEHIND WITH THE ROLLUP!!!
Referee: ONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNEEE!!!!!!!!!!!
Referee: TWOOOWWWWWOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
Referee: TTTTTTHHHHHHRRRRRREEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Stew-O: NO! ALEX MYERS BACK UP!!! JON KELTON CHARGES FORWARDS WITH A CLOTHESLINE! BUT ALEX DUCKS BENEATH! ALEX WITH A DIVING CLOTHESLINE TAKING KELTON DOWN!!! KELTON BACK UP!!!!
Gavin Kirkland: FINAL SYMPHONY!!! ALEX MYERS CONNECTS WITH THE CRUCIFIX DROPPED INTO A LUNGBLOWER!!! IT’S OVER! NEW CHAMP! NEW CHAMP! THE COVER OMG!!!
Referee: ONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNEEE!!!!!!!!!!!
Referee: TWOOOWWWWWOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
Referee: TTTTTTHHHHHHRRRRRREEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Persephone: NO! JON KELTON GETS THE SHOULDER UP! HOW DID HE SURVIVE?!?!?!?!
Stew-O: Such audacity shown by Jon Kelton here tonight. He is the third longest reigning New Breed Champion in EAW history and he intends to be the longest of all time!
Gavin Kirkland: Alex Myers immediately grabs the leg of Jon Kelton and wrestles him into the Dawn of Torment! The Arm trap cross-legged STF has been locked in! Kelton has no choice but to tap out! Kelton is screaming as he tries to reach the ropes! Kelton has been using the ropes as a safe haven all night but now the ropes are his only chance of survival! Kelton lunges forward-
Persephone: Jon Kelton makes it to the bottom rope! Kelton filled with determination not to tap out here tonight! Kelton pulls himself up in the corner as Alex Myers charges in! But a hard boot to the face from Kelton sends Alex staggering back holding their jaw in pain. Alex falls to their knees as Kelton hops up to the middle rope. Kelton flies through the air! Kelton flips over top of Alex! SUNSET FLIP!!! BUT ALEX ROLLS THROUGH-
Stew-O: No! Jon Kelton manages to hang on to Alex Myers despite them rolling through the Sunset Flip! Kelton lifts up Alex high into the air!!! THE SIT DOWN POWERBOMB CONNECTS!!! Kelton now stalking Alex looking to finish things off with one move or another here tonight. Alex back up…
Gavin Kirkland: ANTI-LIFE EQUATION!!! KELTON CONNECTS WITH THE FUTURE SHOCK DDT!!! THE COVER!!! KELTON RETAINS! KELTON RETAINS!!!
Referee: ONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNEEE!!!!!!!!!!!
Referee: TWOOOWWWWWOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
Referee: TTTTTTHHHHHHRRRRRREEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Persephone: BAH GAWD ALMIGHTY THE MATCH HAS NOT ENDED BUT I SHALL END MY LIFE SOON IF IT DOESN’T!
Stew-O: :whoa: Let’s not go too far. But Jon Kelton is going to have to go farther than that to retain his championship! How many have fallen to the Anti-Life Equation? Jon Kelton may need to find an even more drastic method of putting Alex Myers to their death here tonight at Battle of Egypt. Kelton pulls Alex back up…
Gavin Kirkland: FINAL ATONEMENT!!! THE STANDING SPINNING HEEL KICK CONNECTS!!!-
Persephone: No! Alex Myers ducks it! Alex grabs Kelton…
Stew-O: FINAL SYMPHONY!!! ALEX MYERS GETS ALL OF IT ONCE AGAIN! PIN HIM!! WIN THE TITLE!!!
Gavin Kirkland: But Alex Myers is not done yet! Alex runs the ropes… RUNNING KNEE STRIKE CONNECTS!!!
Stew-O: That wasn’t just any Running Knee Strike! That was the J4A!!! The shoutout to ARIA!!!! :wow: !!!!!!!!!!!!! Alex is going to win the championship using ARIA’s finishing move!!!-
Gavin Kirkland: NO! Alex climbing the top rope! Alex going high risk! This may not be a good idea! They had the match won! Alex just pin Kelton and get that gold! Don’t throw it all away!!!
Persephone: Alex Myers standing atop the top turnbuckle as they look around the arena before leaping off!!
Stew-O: SACRIFICE OF EUPHORIA!!!! THE TOP ROPE DOUBLE FOOT STOMP CONNECTS RIGHT TO THE BACK OF JON KELTON’S NECK! KELTON’S NECK SNAPS SIDEWAYS AS THE FORCE OF ALEX’S BOOTS CONNECTS TO THE BONE!!! BAH GAWD ALMIGHTY HE KILLED HIM!!! ALEX WITH THE COVER!!!
Referee: ONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNEEE!!!!!!!!!!!
Referee: TWOOOWWWWWOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
Referee: TTTTTTHHHHHHRRRRRREEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(DING! DING! DING!)
Stephie Love: Here is your winner… and the NEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW EAW NEW BREED CHAMPION…. ALEXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX MYERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(‘End of Heartache’ hits as the crowd explodes both literally and metaphorically.)
Stew-O: O SHIT ALEX MYERS DID IT! WE HAVE A NEW NEW BREED CHAMPION! THE KELTON ERA HAS ENDED! AOAPJFPOAJOFPJ_AS)_$JA_)JF_)ASJ_OP$ASLJFMA
Persephone: The match has ended! AJPJFOAJSPFOJAS_FJ)_SAJF)_SAJF_)AS
Gavin Kirkland: Londyn is coming back out to ringside! JPAJFOAJS+FJ+ASJ+FSAP{JFMANPOHO)S_AU)_$SUAJOFSAFAS
(Alex Myers is shown falling to their knees in gratitude as they are awarded the EAW New Breed Championship by the official as the crowd gives a standing ovation.)
Stew-O: The childhood dream has come true for Alex Myers! All of the hard work has paid off! We have a new New Breed Champion! We have crowned a New Breed Savior here tonight in Egypt!!!
(Alex Myers is shown standing on the top turnbuckle throwing the EAW New Breed Championship high into the air in celebration as Londyn checks on an unconscious Jon Kelton on the mat.)
Gavin Kirkland: Jon Kelton was a phenomenal champion and it took one hell of an athlete to defeat him. I am sure that will not be the last time that Kelton has gold around his waist and if Alex wants to have a long and prosperous reign it is probably a good idea not to give Kelton a rematch in the near future.
Persephone: Oh god the match just ended. Don’t talk about rematches around me.
Stew-O: The new era for the New Breed has begun here tonight at Battle of Egypt. Jon Kelton almost made it to Pain for Pride but instead it looks as if Alex Myers will be the one representing the New Breed division at the show of shows this year!!! The Myers Era has begun!!!
(The camera fades to black as Alex Myers is shown heading backstage with the championship as officials check on Jon Kelton in the ring helping him back up.)
(The camera cuts to a commercial featuring Lisa Wren and Serena Bennett leaving their titles on the desk and walking out in the middle of the show. :periodt:)
(Slowly, from darkness, the camera would fade into view with a long shot of the Borg El Arab Stadium from the outside. Seconds later, it would crossface to the inside, as we get a long shot of the ring, with Bella Braxton standing in the center of it. However, before she announces the next match, the graphic would play on screen…)
Crowd: WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
(The camera would then pan forward to Bella Braxton, holding an EAW-branded microphone in her right hand.)
Bella Braxton: The following contest is scheduled for ONE FALL…
Crowd: ONE FALL!!!
Bella Braxton: And it is for the E…A…W… HARDCOOOOOOOOOORE CHAMPIONSHIIIIIIP!!!!!!!!!!!!
(‘Praise The Lord’ by Bandokay would flood through the sound system, as the crowd would be split between cheers and boos. The titantron would display the Hardcore Championship, as the text “Man of Always” displays over it. A multitude of seconds later, it would swiftly change to “Charlie Marr” as none other than the Champion himself would walk out onto the stage. Given it’s a Hardcore Championship match, he would be wearing tights instead of trunks to suit the match style, as there is a camouflage design in the colors of the Saudi Arabia flag. Raising up the EAW Hardcore Championship, Charlie Marr would sadistically smile at the Championship, before walking down the ramp.)
Bella Braxton: Introducing first… representing the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia… weighing in at 240 pounds… THE EAW HARDCORE CHAMPION… CHARLIEEEE MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRR!!!!!
Stew-O: And here comes Big Match Charlie!!! Just two months ago at Dia Del Diablo, in the main event of Night One, Charlie Marr came successful over former Hardcore Champion Limmy Monaghan, and ever since then he has been on a tear! He defended his title against Amir Yusuf, he competed in the Grand Rampage match, but somewhere along the way he became rivals with his opponent tonight, Ronan Malosi! His and Ronan’s beef escalated so badly, that Charlie ended up THROWING HIM OVERBOARD on the cruise ship just a few weeks ago! Now, though, they both come to a stop before Pain For Pride, with Charlie’s title on the line!
(Charlie Marr would walk up the steel steps, before entering the ring. He drags the title across the floor, before facing the ropes at the side of the Hard-Cam. Charlie stares directly down it, before raising his title up high, once again smiling at his accolade – an accolade of many. He places the Championship over the turnbuckles, before he rests in the corner, and his theme song would fade out.)
Persephone: Finally that British garbage is off.
(Moments later, the lights would fade out, and an engine would be heard. A white Rolls Royce would drive onto the stage, with the only thing lighting said stage up being the headlights on the vehicle. The Rolls Royce would park on the stage, before the engine begins to rev – the driver obviously showing off. Soon, the engine would then stop, alongside the headlights, as the arena goes dark…)
Crowd: …
(“I holla money and the money holla me back
I love the ladies and the ladies love me back
I know Gs and the Gs know me back
Don’t hate – no, we don’t need that!”)
Ronan Malosi: :singing:
(Suddenly, ‘Mo Money’ by Ben McLusky would hit the speakers, as the EAW audience would boo at the over the top, unnecessary entrance. Ronan Malosi would step out of the Rolls Royce, before he twirls, and extends his arms – a visible mic in his hand. Ronan slowly removes his versace shirt, before he begins to walk down the ramp. )
Bella Braxton: And his opponent… as the note says – he is hailing from MONEYVILLE… your SOON TO BE Hardcore- no, MILLION DOLLAR CHAMPION…. ROONAAAAAAAAAAAAAN MAAAALOOOOSIIIIIIII!!
Persephone: Million Dollar what now?
Stew-O: :skip:!!!
Gavin Kirkland: YES! He’s here to bring a new era to the Hardcore Championship! Anyone who knows Ronan knows that this scrap wrestling isn’t what he likes. He has technical prowess, something not a lot of people have – and he’s going to treat this title like a million dollars, rather than $10! As stated earlier, Charlie Marr threw him overboard, but now it’s time for Ronan Malosi to throw his Championship reign overboard, as the Prince of Pennies, the Cash Captain, the Jackpot Jesus is here to be great! He’s radiating that BIG DEAL ENERGY!
(Ronan Malosi walks down to the bottom of the ramp, before his theme song would stop. He stands up on the apron, and begins to talk through the microphone.)
Persephone: Sigh.
Ronan Malosi: SHOOOOSH! I’m talking!
Crowd: :francis:
Ronan Malosi: Now, Charlie – don’t get the wrong idea. I know we’ve had our differences, after all a Million Dollar Megastar such as myself doesn’t get by without making a few enemies, but I wanted to let you know something. I’m proud. No, seriously, I am proud of you. Because, while some of the bozos in that locker room wouldn’t do it, you had the balls to show up tonight! Some of the losers back there would simply no show this match, because they revere my ability too much, and they know they would be outclassed. But you, Charlie, you still had the balls to be a man and accept your loss on the chin!
(Ronan grins as the crowd boos. He would step into the ring.)
Ronan Malosi: So, before we start, I would like to offer you a gentleman’s handshake! No tricks, no pranks. Just a good old fashioned, honorable handshake! What do you say… little man?
(Charlie Marr stares at Ronan with intensity in his eyes. He walks up to Ronan, near to the mic…)
Charlie Marr: I’m going to end the fucking match, right now.
Stew-O: OH SHIT! CHARLIE MARR WITH A RIGHT HAND TO RONAN! HE DROPS THE MIC, AND HIS FADORA FLIES OFF INTO THE CROWD! These two begin to trade blows, as the bell rings!
(DING! DING! DING!)
Gavin Kirkland: And we are underway here tonight, as these two rivals are already at it! In the center of the ring, they’re trading blows, as Charlie seems to have the upper hand! He punches Morbius’ #1 fan backwards into the ropes, before delivering some pretty brutal overhand strikes right onto his chrome dome! Charlie continues to unload on Ronan Malosi right here, already trying to weigh him down, despite the fact the bell has only just rung – hell, they were fighting even before that – which could prove detrimental if Charlie really is trying to end it here! Charlie grabs Ronan by his wrist and presses him off the ropes!
Stew-O: Ronan hits the other side of the ring, as the ropes bend back beyond the post! That large figure of his stretched the ropes as far back as possible, also showing off how far and how hard he was thrown by Charlie! Ronan rebounds here, as Charlie lifts up his leg and connects with a huge big boot! Ronan stumbles back into the ropes, holding onto his jaw, and it’s obvious that he was damaged by Charlie’s attack! Very good shit from Charlie here, but it’s not enough to keep Ronan Malosi off his feet! He has to do more!
Persephone: They need to do less so we can get this match over with quick and easy, much like Gavin’s love life!
Gavin Kirkland: :mjcry: And more he shall do, as Baldy McBitch uses the power of beans on toast to hit a back elbow into Ronan’s head! Ronan drops down to his knees, absolutely stunned following that huge attack to the jaw, and now that means Charlie is in complete control! There’s not an awful lot you can do from this position aside from hoping, and that’s what he’ll be forced to do here as Charlie Marr pulls a U-Turn, and faces the opposite direction – clearly seeking to hit the ropes and dish out even more damage against his kneeling opponent right here! Charlie Marr sprints to the other side of the ring, before he comes back and returns with a HUGE running knee lift to the head!
Stew-O: But Ronan Malosi had some quick thinking, sliding underneath the bottom ropes! The crowd begins to boo!
Crowd: COOOO-WARD! COOOOO-WARD!
Ronan Malosi: (off-mic) Coward? :mjlol: I’m what you call a tactician! Read the room, scrubs-
Stew-O: BUT HERE COMES CHARLIE MARR WITH A SLIDING BASEMENT DROPKICK TO THE BACK OF RONAN’S HEAD! RONAN GOES STUMBLING FORWARD INTO THE CURVATURE OF THE BARRICADE, HOLDING ONTO HIS NECK! Ronan Malosi is stunned on the outside of the ring here, whereas Charlie Marr has all of the advantage! Charlie, now sitting on the apron, stares at Ronan with a sadistic grin on his face! He could be setting him up for something huge, as Marr slips off the apron here, to the outside of the ring, where Ronan doesn’t see him coming! Charlie Marr charges it up… BEFORE GOING FOR A HUGE RUNNING KNEE LIFT INTO THE BARRICADE!!!
Gavin Kirkland: DENIED! RONAN MALOSI MOVES OUT OF THE WAY, AND CHARLIE GOES KNEE-FIRST, BEFORE RONAN HITS A HUGE THROAT STRIKE, SENDING CHARLIE MARR STUMBLING BACK TO THE APRON! RONAN THROWS HIM INSIDE!
Persephone: Charlie is stupid enough to let Ronan rub those two brain cells he calls a brain together, leading him to fucking fail. BUT YEAH! LET’S GO! BROKE BOI GETTING A WEAPON FROM THE RING!
(Ronan kneels down, looking to get a weapon…)
Ronan Malosi: (off-mic) NAH!
Crowd: BOOOOOOO
Ronan Malosi: (off-mic) A man with my technical prowess doesn’t need this baloney! Charlie can keep his backyard wrestling to himself!
Persephone: :francis: Nevermind.
Stew-O: Ronan dunking on the Championship he’s competing for is something else, but I’m not going to fault him given he has done so numerous times in the past! Ronan slides into the ring, before looking down at Charlie…
Ronan Malosi: (off-mic) As for you – you rat-toothed, santa beard looking mofo; that Championship isn’t going to be the Hardcore Championship any longer! When I take you A-Town Down, that’s gonna become the MILLION DOLLAR CHAMPIONSHIP! :drakelike:
Gavin Kirkland: The crowd dislikes everything Ronan Malosi is saying right now… and they’ll dislike him even more, as he locks in his dreaded headlock! This is a man hell bent on using rest holds like the Debbie Downer he is, BOO THIS MAN-
Stew-O: BUT CHARLIE FIGHTS BACK! CHARLIE SWINGS HIM AROUND, BEFORE HITTING A HUGE UPPERCUT TO THE JAW! Ronan Malosi stumbles back, his entire weight pressing up against the ropes, before he stumbles forward in a daze! Charlie Marr is able to take advantage, and lift up the 285 pound stature of Ronan Malosi high off the ground, swinging him around with a complete 180, before SLAMMING him into the ring mat with a devastating spinebuster! He calls that one ‘The Headmaster Ritual’, as he is now able to slide over and enter the lateral press, covering Ronan Malosi!!!
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
TTWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-
Gavin Kirkland: But given how little damage has been done to Ronan Malosi, he kicks out at one! We’ve seen his resilience in the past, even with signature manuevers, so I wouldn’t be too shocked right here! Ronan Malosi slides to the corner, as Charlie gets back up to his feet! I wouldn’t be surprised if Charlie has something up his sleeves right now, as he has been eyeing up his opponent ever since he got out of the pinfall! Charlie Marr may be looking to hit that unfinished running knee lift to completely crack Ronan’s egg, as he charges-
Stew-O: BUT RONAN ATTEMPTS TO USE THE SELF-PROCLAIMED “KEY TO VICTORY” – THE KEYS TO HIS ROLLS ROYCE – WITH A PUNCH TO CHARLIE’S EYE!
Persephone: :comeagain: I understood none of what that meant.
Gavin Kirkland: It doesn’t work! Charlie is able to sidestep out of the way, before grabbing his wrist! Charlie begins to turn the keys around, attempting to gouge Ronan’s eyes out with them… but Ronan yanks his arm back! He elbows Charlie in the chin, before sliding over the middle rope! Ronan is escaping from Charlie Marr right now, however, it may be no use! Charlie grabs him through the ropes, before trying to exit the ring-
Stew-O: BUT RONAN IS ONE STEP AHEAD, AS HE PULLS THE MIDDLE ROPE UPWARD DIRECTLY INTO CHARLIE’S TESTICLES! A HUGE LOW BLOW TO THE HARDCORE CHAMPION, CAUSING HIM TO DROP DOWN ONTO HIS KNEES, OUTSIDE ON THE MAT! RONAN MALOSI IS MAKING SURE THAT MAN STAYS DOWN, MAKING SURE THAT CHARLIE’S MARRS ARE IN PAIN! THAT’S THE MOST SENSITIVE AREA ON THE MALE BODY, AND RONAN IS TREATING IT LIKE A BULLSEYE! OH NO, HE’S NOT DONE! HE GRABS CHARLIE BY THE ANKLES, BEFORE HITTING ANOTHER STRIKE TO THE BALLS – A KNEE DROP! LOW BLOW, RONAN! LOW HANGING FRUIT!
Persephone: I don’t think Ronan gives a fuck about you Stew, and for the first time ever I agree with him. He just wants to win this as much as I want this match over, but I don’t think he’s really doing much of a benefit to him if he’s leaving right now.
(The camera pans from a grounded Charlie Marr, clutching his crotch-area, to Ronan Malosi who is exiting up the ramp. Charlie Marr tried to drown him a few weeks ago, and is now trying to damage him with those knee strikes. He seems fed up of this match already.)
Ronan Malosi: (off-mic) This dude is crrrrazy.
(Ronan continues to walk up the ramp, past his Rolls Royce.)
Ronan Malosi: (off-mic) I’m outta her-… wait a second. :mjlit:
Stew-O: What the hell has Ronan Malosi got planned…? Oh… oh… OH MY GOD…. NO RONAN, NO! HE JUST SAID CHARLIE MARR WAS CRAZY, NOW HE HAS SOMETHING EVEN MORE INSANE SET IN MOTION!
Gavin Kirkland: He’s pulling the key to victory back out yet again…
Stew-O: AND HE’S UNLOCKING HIS CAR DOOR!!!
(Ronan opens up the door to the Rolls Royce, before sitting in the drivers seat. He tells the cameraman to get into the passengers seat, which he does, before the engine starts.)
Stew-O: OH MY GOD, CHARLIE MARR IS ON A KNEE RIGHT NOW, AND RONAN MALOSI HAS STARTED HIS ROLLS ROYCE! HIS CAR! THIS IS ABOUT TO BE VEHICULAR MURDER, WE ARE ABOUT TO SEE CHARLIE’S TITLE REIGN END VIA LITERAL DEATH! RONAN MALOSI IS EITHER A NEXT LEVEL COWARD, OR A NEXT LEVEL PSYCHOPATH, AS HE STARES AT THE BOTTOM OF THE RAMP AT CHARLIE… AND A FEW SECONDS LATER, HE PRESSES HIS FOOT ON THE GAS PEDAL!
(Suddenly, the car accelerates, and begins to speed down the ramp.)
Gavin Kirkland: HE’S BRINGING A WHOLE NEW MEANING TO “KEY TO VICTORY” AS HE INTENDS TO END CHARLIE MARR’S LIFE! THE CAR GOES STEAMROLLING DOWN THE EXTENDED RAMP, HIS HEADLIGHTS GLOWING CHARLIE MARR UP, AS HE LOOKS TO COMMIT A HIT AND RUN WITH HIS ROLLS ROYCE!
Stew-O: THAT CAR GOES TUMBLING DOWN THE RAMP… BEFORE… SPLAT! HE JUST HIT CHARLIE MARR WITH HIS ROLLS ROYCE! RONAN MALOSI HAS JUST ENDED A LIFE ON TELEVISION, HERE AT BATTLE OF EGYPT! OUR UPCOMING PAIN FOR PRIDE EVENT MAY HAVE JUST BEEN CANCELLED, RONAN HAS MURDERED SOMEONE ON TV!!!
(**CRASH!**)
Gavin Kirkland: OH GOD! AT THE LAST SECOND, CHARLIE MARR WAS ABLE TO MOVE OUT OF THE WAY, AND THE CAMERAMAN JUST WENT STRAIGHT THROUGH THE WINDSHIELD, AS RONAN WAS SAVED BY THE AIRBAG! CHRIST ALMIGHTY! THAT CAR CRASHED INTO THE LED APRON BILLBOARD
Stew-O: RONAN’S PLAN BACKFIRED! CHARLIE IS ALIVE! HE LIVES! RONAN MALOSI IS STUCK IN HIS CAR, AS CHARLIE MARR LOOKS UP AT THE CARNAGE… WITH A SMILE ON HIS FACE! HE IS SMILING! ZERO FEAR, ZERO SHOCK, ZERO TRAUMA – HE LIKES HOW INSANE THIS MATCH IS GOING, AND HE’S GOING TO ELEVATE THAT INSANITY! CHARLIE MARR USES THE APRON TO STAND UP!
Persephone: NOOOO!!! I WANTED TO FUCKING WITNESS MURDER! WHY DO I NEVER GET WHAT I WANT?!
Stew-O: Jesus, Charlie just dodged a bullet there, and knowing him he’s going to make that bullet worse. Ronan begins to crawl over onto the passenger seat, with glass getting stuck in his hands, while Charlie Marr climbs up onto the hood of the car – something Ronan has no idea is happening! Last year at Grand Rampage, he ran away from Bronson, only for a kangaroo to bring him back down. Ronan made steps in the right direction by coming back down on his own, but it all blew up in his face! Charlie Marr is back in control, as Ronan looks at the windshield…
Ronan Malosi: (off-mic) What in the sam hell-
Gavin Kirkland: SHOOT KICK TO RONAN’S FACE! Ronan just fell back into the seat, before going head-first onto the glove compartment! He’s dazed, as Charlie grabs him by the ears! He’s about to pull him- DRAG him over that shattered glass, directly onto the hood beside him! Ronan is slightly bleeding on his right arm, with multiple cuts and scratches due to the glass, and I’m sure it’s going to get worse! Charlie lifts Ronan up, before throwing him to the ropes! Charlie pushes him through into the ring, before hooking his head once again, in an all too familiar position… a position that isn’t going to end well for Ronan in the slightest, as he has him set up for what could be the most dangerous version of… THE LAST JUDGEMENT! APRON HUNG DDT ONTO THE CAR!!!!!!
Stew-O: RONAN MALOSI JUST GOT HIS HEAD SPIKED ONTO THAT GLASS-COVERED CAR HOOD, RONAN’S BLOOD BEING STAINED ON THE WHITE PAINT OF THE CAR! THAT’S GOING TO COST A SHIT TON IN REPAIR DAMAGE, BUT MORE THAN LIKELY NOT AS MUCH AS HIS HEALTH CARE BILL! CHARLIE MARR COULD HAVE JUST GIVEN THAT MAN A CONCUSSION! HE ROLLS HIM INTO THE RING, BEFORE COVERING!
OOOONNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!
TTTTTTTTWWWWWWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!
TTTTTTTHRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!
Gavin Kirkland: But Ronan has the shoulder up! I have no idea how he was able to power out of it, but he was! I was convinced that was all over for Ronan Malosi, but it seems he has more to him than meets the eye! Ronan Malosi is fighting to stay in this one, even though he could’ve deemed it to be all over, he could’ve just walked away! He’s not here to lose!
Stew-O: However, neither is Charlie! He picks Ronan Malosi back up, before hitting him with a forearm directly to the jaw! Ronan’s knees fold, and he slowly falls to the ground, giving Charlie even more time to plan ahead! Charlie, grabs Ronan by the pants, before pulling him up – behind him this time – looking to connect with a HUGE half-and-half suplex, spiking Ronan back onto his neck! Ronan immediately bounces to his knees, not on his own tuition however, as Charlie then gets to his knees… AND GRABS A GLASS SHARD FROM THE CAR! HE TURNS TO RONAN AND LOOKS TO DRIVE IT INTO HIS SKULL-
Gavin Kirkland: ELBOW FROM RONAN! The glass shard lands on the mat, as Ronan hits the ropes- KNEE TO THE HEAD FROM CHARLIE! Ronan stumbles back, before Charlie is able to pick him up for a sidewalk slam… DROPPING HIM DIRECTLY ONTO THE GLASS! THE SHARD SHATTERS ALL OVER THE RING, AS RONAN BEGINS TO HOLD HIS BACK! THAT HAS GOT TO BE PAINFUL FOR THE MILLION DOLLAR MEGASTAR, AS CHARLIE MARR ONCE AGAIN SLIDES BACK INTO THE COVER, PERHAPS GOING TO END IT THIS TIME AROUND!
OOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!
TTTTTTTWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
TTTTTTTTTTTTHREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!
Persephone: Unfortunately, Ronan kicks out.
Gavin Kirkland: Charlie attempted to get another pinfall in following that move, however, it didn’t work the way he wanted it to. Regardless of that fact, though, Ronan Malosi is down once again, and Charlie can do whatever he wants! He brushes it off, before choosing to slide out underneath the bottom rope. He could be finding something to deal a large amount of damage to his opponent here tonight! Charlie begins to search under the apron… before shaking his head. He turns to the ring steps, before kicking them! A few kicks later, the top step falls off… what the… what’s that?
Stew-O: I think… I think that’s a box cutter Gavin! Yeah! That’s a damn box cutter! Charlie Marr has found a BOX CUTTER, and I can only assume he was the one to place it there given we don’t usually find weapons underneath the steps! Regardless, though, that’s going to be pretty useful against Ronan Malosi here, as it would be against LITERALLY ANYBODY! Charlie Marr has a sadistic grin plastered across his face, before he rolls underneath the bottom rope, straight into the ring! Ronan is picking glass shards out of his back, before Charlie forearms him in the shoulder bridge!
Gavin Kirkland: Ronan appears to be in even more pain now, dropping down to his knees, holding onto his back! However, Charlie DOES NOT want him down there, he wants him in the corner! He grabs him by the chin, before SLAPPING HIM IN THE THROAT! Ronan is wincing in pain right now, before Charlie is able to slam him back-first into the corner! Yikes! The slices and gashes on Ronan’s back have got to be hurting right now… BUT CHARLIE HAS SOMETHING WORSE IN MIND! HE OPENS UP THE BOX CUTTER, AND SLICES OPEN THE RONAN MALOSI-BRANDED TANK TOP, REVEALING HIS BARE CHEST! HE’S GOING TO GIVE HIM ANOTHER TATTOO, AS HE BEGINS TO CARVE HIS INITIALS INTO HIS LEFT PECTORAL MUSCLE!
(Ronan screams in painful agony, as Charlie slowly carves “C.M.” into his chest – blood quickly gushing out and dripping down his torso. Ronan tries to push Charlie away, and succeeds, accidentally leaving a large line in his chest following the M. The upper left side of his torso is now covered in crimson.)
Stew-O: RONAN MALOSI IS NOT FEELING GREAT RIGHT NOW, AS HIS OPPONENTS’ INITIALS ARE SCARRED ONTO HIS BODY!
Gavin Kirkland: And Charlie is boasting that fact! He raises the box cutter into the air, as all of the anti-Ronan Malosi haters in the arena cheer, while the anti-Charlie Marr haters boo! Charlie uses his hand to clean the blood off of the box cutter, throwing the cutter to the opposite corner, before spreading the blood across his own chest as if it was a war trophy! Charlie Marr is wearing Ronan Malosi’s blood, as he now turns to Ronan –
(**SMASH!**)
Gavin Kirkland: – EATING THE STEEL STEPS DIRECTLY TO THE HEAD! CHARLIE DROPS TO HIS KNEES, AS RONAN PLACES THEM DOWN ON THE GROUND! THE MAYOR OF MONEYVILLE PLACES CHARLIE’S HEAD ONTO THE STEEL STEPS, BEFORE LEAPING INTO THE AIR… AND STOMPING HIS HEAD ONTO THE STEEL! CHARLIE IS OUT COLD, AS RONAN SHOVES HIM ONTO THE MAT! COVER!
OOOOONNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
TTTTTTWWWWWWWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
TTT-
Gavin Kirkland: BUT CHARLIE MARR IS ABLE TO ESCAPE AT TWO! RONAN MALOSI’S PATENTED ‘SLEEPING PILL’ WITH AN EXTRA LEAP WASN’T ENOUGH TO TAKE OUT CHARLIE MARR, EVEN AFTER THE STEEL TO THE HEAD, BUT IT’S A STEP IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION! RONAN MALOSI WAS SO CLOSE TO WINNING THIS MATCH, BUT NOT CLOSE ENOUGH! IT CONTINUES!
Stew-O: That stomp with extra velocity did some damage to Charlie, but the blood-covered Ronan Malosi will need an extra bit of sauce to do the trick. Ronan knows exactly what he needs to do in order to succeed here, as he slowly slides underneath the bottom rope, presumably looking for another weapon! He looks underneath the bottom rope…
(…)
Persephone: Is that a fucking boombox?
(Yes Persephone, it’s a boombox.)
Stew-O: Ronan Malosi has a boombox!!!!
Gavin Kirkland: Is he gonna play his soundcloud mixtape?
(Ronan Malosi slides into the ring, holding the boombox in hand, before using it to push himself up. He raises it in the air, looking to slam it down on Charlie, before gaining an idea.)
Gavin Kirkland: Oh God he’s gonna play his soundcloud mixtape isn’t he?
(Ronan Malosi places the boombox on the ground, before clicking the green button. Those who have seen Ronan’s social stream will be familiar with the song playing…)
(“Ain’t nobody dope as me; I’m dressed so fresh, so clean
So fresh and so clean, clean
Don’t you think I’m so sexy? I’m dressed so fresh, so clean
So fresh and so clean, clean
Ain’t nobody dope as me; I’m dressed so fresh, so clean
So fresh and so clean, clean
I love when you stare at me; I’m dressed so fresh, so clean
So fresh and so clean, clean”)
Gavin Kirkland: Isn’t that the song Ronan did a Tik Tok with? :francis:
Ronan Malosi: (off-mic) :singing: SO RELATABLE!
Crowd: :madstare:
Ronan Malosi: :man_dancing:
Stew-O: BUT WAIT! NO! RONAN MALOSI ENDS HIS TUNES EARLY, AS HE GRABS THE BOOMBOX ONCE MORE… HE SLAMS IT, THIN SIDE FACING CHARLIE, DIRECTLY ONTO MARR’S SKULL – AND THE BOOMBOX FUCKING SHORT CURCUITS! THE SONG STOPS PLAYING, AND PIECES OF IT FLIES OFF INTO THE RING! RONAN WITH THE COVER!!
OOOOOONNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
TTTTTTTTWWWWWWWWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
TTTTTHRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!
…
Stew-O: CHARLIE MARR POPS THE SHOULDER UP! CHARLIE IS ABLE TO KICK OUT OF THE BOOMBOX BEING SLAMMED ONTO HIS HEAD, EVEN THOUGH THERE ARE NOW PATCHES OF BLOOD DIRECTLY ON THE TOP! CHARLIE MARR GOT WRECKED BY THAT BOOMBOX, AND NOW RONAN KNOWS WHAT HE HAS TO DO! HE SLIDES OUT OF THE RING! AND HE’S COMING OVER HERE!
Persephone: NONONONO! THIS MATCH CAN’T GO ANY WORSE THAN IT ALREADY IS GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE!
Stew-O: Ronan Malosi grabs not one, not two, but three chairs from beside us, and he looks to be in a rush! Earlier in this match he was hesitant to do anything Hardcore, he was cowardice, but right now he is hell bent on making sure Charlie Marr stays down for good! Ronan Malosi is trying to prove that he is, in fact, Hardcore – that he has the “minerals” for that Championship as Charlie Marr would phrase it, and what better than going to the classics? You can be creative, but at the end of the day, a good ‘ol steel chair is going to do the job, especially three of them! Ronan Malosi has something grand in mind!
Gavin Kirkland: Ronan slides back into the ring, before placing two of the steel chairs in the corner! Right now, all he needs is one! He sets up the steel chair by extending the seat, and standing it on its legs! Ronan has him set up for devastation, and it could very well be the end of the match! Ronan grabs Charlie by his wrist, and faces him away from the chair… oh my… OH MY GOD! RONAN MALOSI LOOKS TO HIT A TWISTING DEATH RO INTO THE CHAIR! HE PULLS HIM BACK, AND TWISTS IN THE AIR!
Stew-O: BUT CHARLIE BACKFLIPS OUT OF IT! KICK TO THE GUT! ‘THE QUEEN IS DEAD’!!!! THE BUTTERFLY DDT STRAIGHT ONTO THE FUCKING CHAIR, AND IT BENDS UNDER RONAN’S WEIGHT! COVER!!!
OOOOOOOONNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!
TTTTTTTTTTTTWWWWWWWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
TTTTTTTTTTTTTHRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
…
…
…
Stew-O: WHAT!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!? RONAN MALOSI KICKED THE FUCK OUT!!!!
Gavin Kirkland: I CAN’T BELIEVE IT! RONAN MALOSI JUST KICKED OUT OF CHARLIE’S FINISHING MOVE… ON A CHAIR!
Persephone: Maybe this just means he needs to get a new finisher.
Stew-O: THAT IS INSANE! RONAN MALOSI IS BRINGING A NEW LEVEL OF GREATNESS TO THIS MATCH – SOMETHING WE HAVEN’T SEEN FROM HIM IN… WELL… EVER! THIS MAY BE THE BEST VERSION OF RONAN MALOSI SO FAR!
(The camera pans in on Charlie Marr’s slightly bloody face, bug eyed as he’s shocked Ronan kicked out. The camera then pans out, as it transitions to the replay.)
(REPLAY: https://64.media.tumblr.com/a3a1ddddad8fa9744d086ad588713bf0/tumblr_onu4l2UQ3t1s05wxzo1_400.gif)
Gavin Kirkland: Charlie Marr is genuinely shocked right now! Not because the impossible has happened, but because RONAN MALOSI has done that. When Charlie won the Championship, it took a lot out of Charlie to defeat Limmy, but that isn’t an Elitist Charlie underestimated. We may have seen that here tonight! We may have ALL underestimated exactly what Ronan is capable of. Not a single person actually expected a performance such as this one from him. Not a single person actually expected this. Ronan Malosi has turned a new leaf, and for the better! However, I don’t think Charlie entirely sees this…
Stew-O: Charlie Marr slides underneath the bottom rope, now looking for another weapon! He lifts the apron up from the ground, and takes a peek underneath, looking for what he can grab… and he certainly sees a lot! First he grabs a plastic bag… then BARBED WIRE… and to top it all off, a fucking SHOVEL! He has just introduced a collage of items he can use to damage Ronan Malosi in this match up, and I’m sure if used right, they can be fucking brutal! Beyond a shadow of a doubt, Charlie KNOWS how to make those useful!
Gavin Kirkland: Charlie Marr re-enters the ring, as he grabs the shovel in his hand upon doing so! Ronan Malosi is barely getting up to his knees, as he grabs onto the camouflage tights of Charlie Marr! He’s using Charlie to keep himself up, he’s really turning a new cheek! Charlie Marr raises the shovel… but stops. He notices Ronan hanging onto his attire, and lowers the shovel down, inevitable dropping it. Charlie Marr grabs Ronan by the chin, before punching him directly into the damn cheek!
Charlie Marr: (off-mic) You are a JOKE Elitist.
Gavin Kirkland: Punch!
Charlie Marr: (off-mic) You don’t have the minerals to become Hardcore Champion, you’re a laughing stock.
Gavin Kirkland: Another punch!
Charlie Marr: (off-mic) We are here to watch you fail yet again, and you’ll make all the excuses in the world because of it.
Persephone: Punch yet again! This is fun!
Charlie Marr: (off-mic) You’re proud I showed up? Be proud that this place still WANTS you here.
Persephone: PUNCH!
Charlie Marr: (off-mic) You think Ryan Adams re-signed your contract expecting greatness? You’re here so **I** look better.
Persephone: PUNCH!
Charlie Marr: (off-mic) Stay.
(**PUNCH!**)
Charlie Marr: (off-mic) The fuck.
(**PUNCH!**)
Charlie Marr: (off-mic) DOWN!
(**PUNCH-**)
Stew-O: RONAN MALOSI WITH THE COUNTER! KEY TO VICTORY! HE USES THE ROLLS ROYCE KEY TO JAB CHARLIE STRAIGHT IN THE EYE, BEFORE SWINGING HIM AROUND FOR THE ‘VERTIGO’ DEEP SIX DIRECTLY ONTO THE ROLL OF BARBED WIRE!!!! COVER!
OOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!
TTTTTTTTTTTTTTTWWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
Gavin Kirkland: KICK OUT! KICK OUT FROM CHARLIE-
Stew-O: CROSSFACE! RONAN MALOSI LOCKS IN THE CRIPPLER CROSSFACE! SHADES OF HIS 2019 PERSONA HERE UNDER THE GUISE OF THE CAPE TOWN CRIPPLER! HE BROUGHT OUT A BRUTAL SIDE OF HIMSELF JUST FOR THIS MOMENT! CHARLIE IS TRYING TO CRAWL AWAY, BUT THERE ARE NO ROPE BREAKS! CHARLIE GRABS THE SHOVEL-
Gavin Kirkland: SHOVEL ASSISTED CROSSFACE! RONAN IS USING THE WOODEN HANDLE TO BREAK CHARLIE’S NOSE, ALONGSIDE THE CROSSFACE! A NEW MOVE FOR RONAN MALOSI HERE, WITH THE VISCIOUSNESS HE USED TO HAVE! CHARLIE MARR IS STRUGGLING TO GET AWAY NOW THAT THE SHOVEL IS THERE – HOWEVER, HE’S TRYING! HE’S TRYING TO PUNCH RONAN IN THE STOMACH, OR CHEST, TO MAKE HIM BACK OFF! THEY AREN’T LANDING THOUGH! RONAN’S ARM LENGTH AND WEIGHT DIFFERENCE IS ENOUGH TO STOP CHARLIE FROM MANAGING TO ESCAPE… BUT HE COMES UP WITH A NEW METHOD! CHARLIE ROLLS ONTO HIS BACK!
Stew-O: WITH THE CROSSFACE STILL APPLIED, CHARLIE ROLLS ONTO HIS BACK BEFORE KICKING RONAN IN HIS! HE BEGINS TO HIT SHOOT KICKS THAT LOOSENS THE GRIP… BEFORE IT BREAKS! THE CROSSFACE IS BROKEN! CHARLIE RIPS THE BARBED WIRE DIRECTLY OUT OF HIS BACK, BEFORE GETTING UP ONTO HIS FEET! CHARLIE TRIES TO PLACE THE BARBED WIRE ONTO RONAN’S HEAD-
**CRACK!**
Stew-O:- BUT RONAN SWINGS THE SHOVEL INTO CHARLIE’S STOMACH! CHARLIE FALLS ONTO HIS KNEES, BEFORE RONAN KICKS HIM BACKWARD! NO! NO WHAT IS HE DOING??? NO! RONAN PLACES HIS FOOT ON CHARLIE’S CHEST, BEFORE LIFTING THE SHOVEL UP INTO THE AIR! DON’T DO IT!
Ronan Malosi: (off-mic) Ya goof ass tryna trash talk? :mjlol2:
Persephone: HE DRILLS THE SHOVEL STRAIGHT INTO CHARLIE’S THROAT! CHARLIE IS ROLLING AROUND IN AGONY AND I FUCKING LOVE IT!!!
Stew-O: FOR THOSE WHO HAVEN’T BEEN HIT IN THE THROAT, DO NOT TRY IT! ESPECIALLY WITH A FUCKING SHOVEL! THE AMOUNT OF PAIN CHARLIE MUST BE IN RIGHT NOW IS IMMEASURABLE! AND IT’S ONLY GOING TO GET WORSE FROM HERE! RONAN MALOSI GRABS CHARLIE MARR BY HIS WRIST, AND BEGINS TO PREPARE FOR THE END! HE’S LOOKING TO FINISH THIS ENTIRE MATCH RIGHT NOW! RONAN MALOSI BEGINS TO ELBOW CHARLIE IN THE EAR, OVER AND OVER, TO WEAR HIM DOWN EVEN MORE!
Gavin Kirkland: THOSE ELBOWS CONTINUE, AS CHARLIE IS GETTING MORE AND MORE LIMP IN THE LEGS, AND EVENTUALLY, HE HAS TO STOP! HE IS EXTREMELY CLOSE TO FINISHING THIS ONE UP! RONAN MALOSI HITS ONE FINAL ELBOW, BEFORE DRAGGING CHARLIE BACK OVER TO THE STEEL STEPS! IT’S ALL OVER! HE PUSHES HIM BACK BY THE FACE, BEFORE USING HIS ARM TO REEL HIM IN… DEATH RO!!!!! DEATH RO CONNECTS DIRECTLY ONTO THE STEEL STEPS, AND CHARLIE IMMEDIATELY BOUNCES OFF ONTO THE MAT! HE’S OUT COLD! RONAN MALOSI IS CHAMPION ONCE AGAIN! RONAN MALOSI IS CHAMPION IN EAW FOR THE SECOND TIME!!!!
Stew-O: RONAN IS LYING ON THE STEEL STEPS DUE TO THE LANDING, ESPECIALLY CONSIDERING THE CUTS ON HIS BACK, STRUGGLING TO ROLL OVER INTO THE COVER… BUT HE’S GOING TO TRY! HE PEELS HIS BACK OFF OF THE STEEL, BEFORE FLOPPING DOWN ON TOP OF CHARLIE’S BODY! HE’S LAYING OVER HIM RIGHT NOW, IT COULD ALL BE OVER! THE COVER IS IN! THE COVER IS IN! THREE MORE SECONDS AND RONAN COULD VERY WELL BE CHAMPION ONCE MORE IN THIS COMPANY!
OOOOONNNNNNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!
TTTTTTTTTTTWWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
TTTTTTTHRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!
Persephone: DING! DING! DING!
Stew-O: WAIT JUST A SECOND GAVIN! CHARLIE WAS ABLE TO POP THE SHOULDER UP AT THE LAST SECOND!!!!
Persephone: : (
(The camera cuts to a slow-motion replay, as the referee’s hand is about to hit three, Charlie Marr pops his left shoulder up off the mat. Just for a split second, Ronan believed he had it won, until the referee told him no.)
Ronan Malosi: (off-mic) Are you KIDDING ME right now?
Referee: (off-mic) It was a 2 count, big homie.
Ronan Malosi: https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/569475698050465832/977561265964732506/video0_85.mov
(The camera cuts away from Ronan yelling at the referee, to Charlie Marr – clenching his fist as he tries to gather feeling back in his body. The Death Ro was enough to keep him down, but he begins to stir. Ronan sees this, and turns around. Charlie crawls towards Ronan…)
Ronan Malosi: (off-mic) Ah fuck! Stay down ya Saudi apologist!
Gavin Kirkland: Ronan Malosi punches Charlie in the head, before he begins to pull him back up to his feet! Ronan places Charlie in the Butterfly position… we’ve seen this move before! We’ve seen Ronan do this in the past! Is he bringing out the old guns- NO!
Stew-O: CHARLIE MARR SLIPS OUT SLOWLY, BEFORE JAMMING THE BARBED WIRE INTO HIS FOREHEAD! RONAN DOES A 180 AFTER CHARLIE RIPS IT OUT, AND NOW HE PLACES THE PLASTIC BAG WITH ZERO BREATHING HOLES OVER RONAN’S HEAD! TO MAKE MATTERS WORSE, HE WRAPS THE BARBED WIRE AROUND IT! HE SEALS IT SHUT WITH FUCKING BARBED WIRE! NOT ONLY CAN RONAN NOT BREATHE, BUT THAT BARBED WIRE IS PIERCING HIS SKIN! RONAN IS IN DIRE TROUBLE RIGHT NOW, IF HE CAN’T FIND A WAY OUT OF IT, IT’LL ALL BE OVER! RONAN DROPS TO HIS KNEES!
Gavin Kirkland: COQUINA CLUTCH FROM CHARLIE! THAT’S ONE OF RONAN MALOSI’S FINISHING MOVES FROM 2019!!! ONE OF HIS OLD MOVES! HE IS SUCKING THE LIFE OUT OF RONAN EVEN QUICKER THAN WITH THE PLASTIC BAG OVER HIS HEAD! A STANDING COQUINA CLUTCH HAS RONAN GASPING FOR AIR, WITH NONE REACHING HIS LUNGS! HE IS CUT OFF FROM ANY AND ALL OXYGEN, AND HIS BEST HOPE IS IRONICALLY THE BARBED WIRE MAKING A HOLE THAT DOESN’T CUT HIM! IT DOESN’T SEEM TO BE THE CASE THOUGH! RONAN MALOSI MAY HAVE JUST LOST! RONAN MALOSI IS ABOUT TO FADE OUT OF THE TITLE PICTURE, AND THE MATCH ITSELF!
Stew-O: RONAN IS TRYING WITH ALL HIS MIGHT TO GET CHARLIE’S ARMS OFF OF HIM, BUT THE ODDS ARE STACKED AGAINST HIM! CHARLIE ATTEMPTS TO FALL BACK WITH THE COQUINA CLUTCH JUST LIKE RONAN USED TO DO, AND AFTER SOME STRUGGLING, IT WORKS! HE METAPHORICALLY BREAKS RONANS ANKLES, AND RONAN FALLS BACK! HE HAS NOWHERE TO GO! IT’S OVER FROM HERE RONAN! IT’S ALL OVER! CHARLIE MARR IS ABOUT TO RETAIN! RONAN’S ARMS ARE GOING LIMP… RONAN’S ARMS ARE FLOPPING TO THE GROUND! IF HE PASSES OUT IT’S ALL OVER! IT’S ALL OVER!
…
Stew-O: HE DIRECTS HIS ARM TO HIS FACE! RONAN TEARS A PIECE OF THE PLASTIC BAG FREEING HIS MOUTH! HE HAS AIR! HE HAS AIR!
Gavin Kirkland: RONAN TWISTS HIS BODY TO FACE CHARLIE, BEFORE HEADBUTTING HIM! THE BARBED WIRE STICKS TO THE TWO TOGETHER! THEY ARE LITERALLY STUCK BY THEIR HEADS!
(Ronan Malosi and Charlie Marr both wrestle on the ground, before slowly and eventually getting to their knees. They trade body shots, after all, there is nothing more they can do. Their heads are stuck together due to the barbed wire – blood brothers in war.)
Stew-O: RONAN AND CHARLIE TRADING UPPERCUTS TO THE GUT, OVER, AND OVER, AND OVER! THESE TWO AREN’T GOING TO STOP, AND SO, CHARLIE HAS TO TAKE MATTERS INTO HIS OWN HANDS! HE RIPS THE PLASTIC BAG OFF OF RONAN’S HEAD IN ORDER TO RELEASE THEIR SITUATION! HE GOT RID OF HIS OWN TRAP SO HE COULD CONTINUE!
Gavin Kirkland: BUT A BIG BOOT FROM RONAN CATCHES CHARLIE OFF GUARD!
Stew-O: OR SO YOU THOUGHT! CHARLIE CATCHES HIS FOOT, BEFORE LOCKING RONAN IN THE ANKLE LOCK! PTSD RUNNING THROUGH THE BUILDING, AS THIS IS THE MOVE THAT BRONSON DANIELS WAS ABLE TO BEAT RONAN WITH JUST ONE YEAR AGO!!!!
Gavin Kirkland: RONAN MALOSI IS PANACKING IN THE RING, AS HE TAPPED OUT TO THIS MOVE LAST YEAR AT GRAND RAMPAGE – THE DIFFERENCE HERE IS THERE ARE NO ROPE BREAKS TO EVEN ASSIST HIM! IF HE CAN’T ESCAPE THE MOVE HE POPULARIZED, ONLY TO FALL TO, THEN CHARLIE COULD HAVE THIS ONE IN THE BAG! RONAN IS SCRATCHING AND CLAWING FOR SOME TYPE OF WEAPON, BUT CHARLIE HAS THIS HOLD LOCKED IN PERFECTLY!
Stew-O: RONAN MALOSI HAS NOWHERE TO GO! THIS IS THE SECOND SUBMISSION IN A ROW THAT HAS BEEN INVOLVED WITH HIS PAST, AND HE JUST BARELY GOT OUT OF THE LAST ONE! RONAN MALOSI MAY BE DONE HERE! HE’S TRYING SO HARD NOT TO SUBMIT TO THIS SUBMISSION MOVE, HE’S TRYING SO HARD NOT TO LET CHARLIE GET THE BETTER OF HIM, BUT HE IS BADLY FAILING! HIS ARM IS JUST A FEW METERS OFF THE GROUND, AND HE CONTINUES TO THINK ABOUT SUBMITTING! HE’S SO CLOSE TO TAPPING! HE IS SO CLOSE! … IT’S OVER! RONAN MALOSI TAPS TO THE ANKLE LOCK! HE LOSES TWO YEARS IN A ROW TO THE ANKLE LOCK!
Persephone: LMAOOOOOOOOOOO-
Stew-O: NO! HE DIDN’T TAP! HE USED THAT MOMENTUM TO ROLL HIS BODY, AND FLICK HIS RIGHT BOOT OFF! CHARLIE STUMBLES OVER THE STEEL STEPS, HOLDING RONAN’S BOOT, CONFUSED! OH MY, RONAN IS A GENIUS! HE THREW THAT KICK SO CHARLIE WOULD CATCH IT! THE BOOT WAS ALREADY LOOSENED! NOW RONAN REACHES INTO HIS SOCK AND GRABS SOMETHING, THOUGH, IT MAY BE TOO LATE! CHARLIE SPRINTS AT RONAN MALOSI, LOOKING TO CATCH HIM OFF GUARD, LOOKING TO KNOCK HIM OUT COLD-
Gavin Kirkland: BUT RONAN MALOSI IS ABLE TO DO THE OPPOSITE! HE PUNCHES CHARLIE IN THE SKULL, AND HE HAD THE BRASS KNUCKLES ON HIS HAND! HE HID BRASS KNUCKLES IN THAT FOOT HE ALLOWED THE ANKLE LOCK TO BE APPLIED TO! HE’S SHOWING THE WORLD JUST HOW MUCH HE’S IMPROVED SINCE LAST YEAR, BY OUTSMARTING CHARLIE TWICE OVER! HE TRICKED HIM INTO APPLYING A HOLD, THEN HE TRICKED HIM BY GETTING OUT OF IT! RONAN MALOSI JUST MESSED CHARLIE’S SHIT UP!
Stew-O: BUT HE’S NOT DONE THOUGH! HE LIFTS CHARLIE MARR UP TO HIS FEET, BEFORE GOING BACK INTO THE BUTTERFLY POSITION! ‘FEAR FACTOR’!!!! AN OLD MOVE OF RONAN’S – THE FUTURE SHOCK DDT! HE HAS ENDED MULTIPLE MATCHES WITH THAT MOVE, AND NOW AS A LAST RESORT, HE USES IT!!!! COVER!
OOOOONNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
TTTTTTTTTWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
TTTTTTTTTTTTTHRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!
Stew-O: KICK OUT FROM CHARLIE!
Crowd: :damn:!!!!!!!!
Persephone: :noah:!!!!!!!
(Ronan Malosi rolls off of Charlie Marr, exhausted, and tired. After a good 20 seconds of breathing on the ground, he begins to roll; going to the corner of the ring, before exiting completely. He kneels down on the outside, lifting up the ring mat. He has an expression on his face that screams “I want to end this” – and so, he grabs three items. A bunch of light tubes, a door, and a ladder.)
Gavin Kirkland: :lupe: I don’t like what he has in mind here!
(Ronan slides the light tubes into the ring, alongside the ladder, before bridging the door on the barricade and the apron.)
Stew-O: :lupe: I don’t like what he has in mind with that DOOR!
(Ronan then slides back into the ring; firstly setting up the light tubes, wedging them into the corner of the turnbuckles. He then picks up the ladder, slowly, and extends it. Ready to be climbed on. He looks to turn to Charlie, until…)
Stew-O: CHARLIE SMOTHERS RONAN WITH HIS VINTAGE VERSACE SHIRT! IT’S COVERED WITH BLOOD NOW! STAINED! HE’LL NEVER GET THAT CLEAN!
Persephone: RONAN SHOVES CHARLIE OFF LIKE HE’S A HOMELESS MAN ASKING FOR CHANGE!
Ronan Malosi: (off-mic) YOU KNOW HOW MUCH THAT COST ME, MAFAKA??? C’MERE!
Gavin Kirkland: RONAN CHARGES… STRAIGHT INTO A HEADBUTT! CHARLIE MARR ISN’T DONE THOUGH, AS HE LOCKS HIM IN THE BUTTERFLY POSITION… BEFORE GOING STRAIGHT INTO THE SUBMISSION THAT ENDED AMIR YUSUF! THE BUTTERFLY DDT LOCK! CHARLIE UNFORTUNATELY DOESN’T HIT ‘THE QUEEN IS DEAD’ THIS TIME AROUND, BUT HE STILL LOCKS IN THE SUBMISSION MOVE! RONAN MALOSI COULD BE OUT OF IT HERE! THIS IS THE THIRD ONE IN A ROW! CHARLIE MARR IS TRYING HIS HARDEST TO MAKE THIS MAN SUBMIT! CHARLIE IS WRENCHING AT HIS THROAT!
Stew-O: BUT RONAN ISN’T HAVING IT! THE ADRENALINE THAT IS COURSING THROUGH HIS VEINS ALLOWS HIM TO STAND UP BEFORE IT CAN BE FULLY LOCKED IN! RONAN SLOWLY PICKS CHARLIE OFF THE GROUND, BEFORE TURNING AROUND… AND SLAMMING HIM INTO THE LIGHT TUBES! CHARLIE FALLS TO THE GROUND, AND RONAN COVERS HIM!!!
OOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
TTTTTTTTTTTWWWWWWWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!
TTTTTTTTTTTHRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
…
Stew-O: CHARLIE MARR IS ABLE TO KICK OUT ONCE MORE! NEITHER OF THESE TWO MEN ARE GIVING UP! NEITHER OF THESE TWO MEN ARE TAKING NO FOR AN ANSWER! WHAT A MATCH!
(Ronan Malosi rolls off of Charlie. Tired, bloodied, battered. Barely moving. He stares up at the lights, wondering what it’ll take to put the former EAW World Champion away. Ronan wipes the blood out of his eyes, before pushing himself off the mat.)
Stew-O: What a war between these two men! There is nothing that is keeping the other down, they continue to push forward! I’m beginning to wonder if these two are even human! This is by far the strongest we’ve ever seen Ronan Malosi, and for good reason. This is his REDEMPTION moment. This is the moment where he can finally recover from all of the hardships sent his way. Where he can finally bounce back from the losses people try to hold against him. But this is also Charlie’s big moment too! He could walk into Pain For Pride as Hardcore Champion. He could prove to the world exactly why he’s the perfect fit for it. He could show the entire industry that the barbaric nature of his personality isn’t one to be taken lightly, and that every single doubter he has is idiotic. These two are FIGHTING for something, but only ONE of them can gain it. That’s the beauty of competition, that is why these two are bleeding right now!
Gavin Kirkland: That was perfectly said! These two Elitists are bleeding heavily for their own cause. These two are leeding for their own goals. They’re giving it all, and leaving nothing behind, just so they can walk out as Hardcore Champion. Just as Limmy Monaghan, and Adam Lucas did before them! Charlie Marr is carrying that legacy onward, and Ronan Malosi may jus the the next torch bearer! He’s proven himself capable here, without a shadow of a doubt. There’s nothing you can take away from this man. Win, lose, or draw, he is a threat in EAW and people need to open their eyes! If they don’t, then he is about to have the most surprising season ender, and unrightfully so. It shouldn’t be a surprise anymore! Ronan Malosi has proven to the entire world that he is that damn good. Charlie Marr, on the other hand, is BACKING IT UP. As these two bash heads, and begin to stand back up on their feet, that couldn’t be any more evident! LET THEM FIGHT MORE!
(Charlie Marr and Ronan Malosi go forehead to forehead, before they begin to trade elbows!)
Crowd: RO-NAN! RO-NAN! CHAR-LIE! CHAR-LIE! :clap::clap:
Stew-O: Ronan with the forearm! Charlie with the uppercut! Ronan! Charlie! Ronan! Charlie! Ronan! Ronan! Ronan…. RONAN! RONAN WITH A FOREARM THAT FORCES CHARLIE TO THE MAT! He’s not done, though, as he begins to roll Charlie out onto the door that is bridged on the apron and barricade! He sends him outside, before he stumbles over to the ladder!
(Ronan Malosi lazily, weakly, and tiredly begins to climb up the ladder. One step at a time, he slowly makes his way to the top, ready to dive off…)
Gavin Kirkland: I don’t know if my eyes deceived me or if Ronan Malosi was actually heading to the top of a ladder on purpose, BUT IT LOOKS LIKE IT’S NOT GONNA MATTER ANYWAY AS CHARLIE MARR JUST RUSHED UP TO THE TOP OF THE LADDER!!! CHARLIE MARR IS AT THE TOP OF THE LADDER WITH RONAN MALOSI!!!!
Persephone: Oh my God this is gonna be good!!! RONAN MALOSI JUST SWUNG AT CHARLIE, BUT CHARLIE DUCKED UNDER IT BEFORE HEADBUTTING RONAN!!!! CHARLIE MARR IS HOOKING RONAN’S ARM OVER HIS HEAD NOW!!!
Stew-O: OH MY GOD!!! SUPERPLEX OFF THE LADDER, THROUGH THE DOOR!!!!!!!!
Gavin Kirkland: CHARLIE MARR JUST PUT BOTH HIMSELF AND RONAN MALOSI THROUGH THE DOOR ALL THE WAY OUT AT RINGSIDE!!!!! THESE TWO ARE LEGITIMATELY KILLING EACH OTHER, ALL FOR THE HARDCORE CHAMPIONSHIP!!!!
Persephone: Yeah, and it’s amazing! WE NEED MORE OF THIS!!!! These two can barely move, isn’t it great?
Stew-O: These two are hurting badly, and you have to wonder how they’re even living at this point!
(It takes a while, but somehow Charlie Marr is the first to stir. Charlie slowly begins to drag something out from underneath the ring – it being none other than a small, inflatable swimming pool with water inside. He takes a bit of time to bring it into the ring, before Charlie reaches back under…)
Gavin Kirkland: Charlie Marr just grabbed an EXPOSED FAN WITH RAZOR BLADES ON THE PROPELLERS… and… IT’S NOT EVEN THE MOST INSANE THING IN THERE!
Stew-O: YOU’RE RIGHT GAVIN… HE JUST GOT A CAR BATTERY AND TWO CABLES!!!! CHARLIE SLIDES THE CAR BATTERY INTO THE RING, BEFORE ATTACHING THE CABLES TO IT! HE PLACES THE OPEN ENDS IN THE WATER… OH MY GOD… SOMEONE IS GOING TO GET ELECTROCUTED HERE! SOMEBODY IS ABOUT TO LAND IN THAT POOL, AND THEY’RE GOING TO GET ELECTROCUTED! THAT IS ABSOLUTELY FUCKING INSANE!
Gavin Kirkland: BUT HERE COMES RONAN! HE GRABS CHARLIE BY THE BOOT, AND PULLS HIM OUTSIDE THE RING! HE BEGINS TO HIT HIM WITH RAPID FOREARMS TO THE BACK OF THE HEAD, OVER AND OVER! RONAN IS WEIGHING HIM DOWN HERE, MAKING SURE THAT HE DOESN’T GET TO DO WHAT HE WANTS TO DO-
Stew-O: BUT CHARLIE COUNTERS WITH A HUGE RIGHT HOOK TO RONAN’S JAW! RONAN STUMBLES BACKWARDS, BLEEDING FROM THE MOUTH! I THINK CHARLIE JUST KNOCKED A TOOTH OUT! I THINK CHARLIE JUST KNOCKED A TOOTH OUT OF RONAN MALOSI’S MOUTH! BLOOD IS TRICKLING OUT OF IT, AND RONAN IS REACHING INSIDE! HE HAS LOST A TOOTH! THAT PUNCH WAS SO DEVASTATING HE LOST A TOOTH! BUT THAT’S NOT ALL THOUGH! HE’S ABOUT TO GET SOMETHING EVEN WORSE! CHARLIE MARR GRABS THE DESK FAN WITH THE RAZOR BLADES, BEFORE PRESSING THE BUTTON THAT SAYS THREE! IT IS SPINNING OUT OF CONTROL, AS HE SWINGS IT AT RONAN’S BACK!
Persephone: YEHSHSHAHAHABEHWBWJWNWKWNWOE!!!!
Stew-O: THAT IS DISGUSTING! CHUNKS OF SKIN AND BLOOD ARE NOW FLYING ALL OVER CHARLIE’S CHEST, AND ALL OVER THE GROUND! CHARLIE RELEASES THE FAN FROM RONAN’S BACK, AS RONAN DROPS TO HIS KNEES! JESUS FUCKING CHRIST! CHARLIE IS ACTUALLY TRYING TO KILL RONAN! HE IS ACTUALLY TRYING TO END HIS LIFE! RONAN MALOSI’S BACK IS COVERED IN BLOOD, ALMOST LIKE IT WAS A VAN GOGH PAINTING AND HIS BACK WAS A CANVAS! CHARLIE MARR GRABS RONAN BY THE BOTTOMS, BEFORE ROLLING HIM INTO THE RING! HE QUICKLY SLIDES IN BEHIND HIM!
Gavin Kirkland: CHARLIE MARR IS LOOKING TO END RONAN MALOSI RIGHT HERE! CHARLIE MARR ISN’T JUST LOOKING TO END THE MATCH, HE’S KILLING HIM! THAT ELECTRIC SWIMMING POOL IS DIRECTLY NEXT TO THEM, AND CHARLIE MARR IS NOW SETTING UP FOR A HUGE FALLING POWERBOMB DIRECTLY INTO IT! CHARLIE PICKS RONAN UP TO HIS FEET AND KICKS HIM IN THE GUT… BEFORE HE LIFTS HIM OFF THE GROUND… NO! THE FIRST ATTEMPT FAILED… RONAN KICKED HIS FEET DOWN… BUT THE SECOND WORKS! HE PICKS RONAN UP OFF THE MAT, AND TURNS HIM TO FACE THE POOL! OH MY GOD, HE IS GOING TO END HIS LIFE-
Stew-O: RONAN SLIPS OFF OF CHARLIE’S SHOULDERS! HE LANDS ON HIS FEET, BEFORE CHARLIE TURNS AROUND… ‘DREAM CRUSHER!’ THE RIGHT HOOK CONNECTS ON CHARLIE’S JAW, AND CHARLIE FALLS TO HIS KNEES! RONAN IS GOING TO END IT HERE! HE GRABS CHARLIE BY HIS WRIST, BEFORE PICKING HIM OFF THE MAT… DEATH RO!!!!!! THE DEATH RO CONNECTS DIRECTLY ONTO THE MAT, THIS IS OVER! IT’S ALL OVER!
Persephone: Ronan Malosi is about to become a Champion again. Charlie Marr should just retire now!
(Ronan slides away from a downed Charlie, looking at him. He could pin him… but he chooses not to. Ronan turns his head to the turnbuckles. The crowd instantly knows what he has in mind.)
Stew-O: Oh my God… he’s not pinning! He’s not going for the cover! Instead, he has something even more brutal in mind! Even more devastating! He’s looking for the move that WON HIM THE INTERWIRE CHAMPIONSHIP! THE AVALANCHE DEATH RO! Ronan grabs Charlie by his beard, before lifting him up off the ground! He is losing blood by the second, however, it does not matter! Ronan is looking to win this Championship! Ronan places Charlie on the top rope, before he begins to scale them too! These two men are on the top turnbuckles right now!
Persephone: I think the Hardcore Championship is my favorite title. Even Ronan Malosi is putting on a passable match!
Stew-O: And Ronan is looking to wear Charlie down even more! Ronan starts hitting him with huge knuckle arrows – those overhead punches – right onto where the boombox cut Charlie open! There’s no jokes here! No comedy! He’s looking to end a life, as he opens up that gash! Charlie Marr is lifeless on the top rope right now, as Ronan is dealing some major damage! He’s about to take him out, and badly! Ronan stops with the punches, before standing up on the top rope! He lifts Charlie up too! This could all be over in a matter of a few seconds!
Gavin Kirkland: Ronan Malosi lifts Charlie up into the fallaway slam position, however, he’s not going to hit one! We’ve seen him perform the Death Ro with this alternate variant a few times before, and now he’s going to end it all right here! Ronan Malosi stands up straight… BEFORE RELEASING HIS LEGS AND SWINGING HIM AROUND! HE HITS AN AVALANCHE DEATH RO, STRAIGHT INTO THE ELECTRIC POOL!!!!! NEW HARDCORE CHAMPION!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Stew-O: CHARLIE HOOKS HIS LEG ON THE TOP ROPE, AND RONAN MALOSI FALLS DIRECTLY ON THE EDGE OF THE POOL! CHARLIE WAS ABLE TO SLIP DOWN AT THE LAST SECOND, AND REMAIN ON THE OUTSIDE OF THE RING, WHEREAS RONAN IS IN IMMINENT DANGER! RONAN WAS SO CLOSE TO BECOMING HARDCORE CHAMPION, BUT HE WASN’T CLOSE ENOUGH! RONAN HITS HIS HEAD ON THE MAT, AND HE’S DAZED! ADJUSTING HIMSELF TO TRY AND STAND UP, RONAN MOVES BACKWARDS, BUT HE DOESN’T SEE THAT THE POOL OF WATER IS DIRECTLY BEHIND HIM! HE’S IN DANGER HERE! HE’S IN GREAT DANGER! CHARLIE MARR CLIMBS UP THE TURNBUCKLES ONCE AGAIN, BEFORE STANDING ON THE TOP ROPE!!! RONAN MALOSI HAS GOT TO THINK QUICKLY, BECAUSE THIS COULD ALL BE OVER IN JUST A FEW SHORT SECONDS! RONAN, ACT FAST! NO! NOOOOOOOO!!!!
Persephone: :oh:!!!
Stew-O: CHARLIE MARR STANDS UP TALL, BEFORE LEAPING HIGH INTO THE AIR! HE PLACES HIS FEET RIGHT IN FRONT OF HIS CHEST, BEFORE HE DRILLS THEM STRAIGHT INTO RONAN’S! ‘SIN SALIDA’ CONNECTS, AND RONAN MALOSI FALLS BACKWARDS INTO THE ELECTRIC POOL! HE’S BEING ELECTROCUTED AS WE SPEAK RIGHT NOW, WHEREAS CHARLIE MARR ROLLS BACKWARDS TO SAFETY! RONAN IS STUCK IN THE POOL, BEING FRIED RIGHT NOW! IT’S OVER! RONAN IS DONE FOR! CHARLIE USES THE ROPES TO PULL HIMSELF UP, BEFORE HE GRABS ONTO RONAN’S FOOT WITH ONE HAND, AND PULLS HIM OUT OF THE POOL! THE CAR BATTERY IS SMOKING RIGHT NOW, BUT THAT ISN’T A WORRY!
Gavin Kirkland: THE SIN SALIDA DIVING FOOT STOMP JUST SENT RONAN INTO BEING ELECTROCUTED, AND NOW IT’S ALL OVER FOR HIM! HIS DREAMS OF BECOMING CHAMPION YET AGAIN IN THIS COMPANY ARE GOING TO BE CRUCIFIED, REDUCED TO NOTHING, WHEREAS CHARLIE MARR IS ABOUT TO RETAIN! HE SLOWLY DROPS DOWN TO HIS KNEES, BEFORE PLACING A SINGULAR ARM OVER RONAN’S CHEST! IT’S ALL OVER! THE REFEREE COULD COUNT TO TEN! WE NEED MEDICAL ATTENTION OUT HERE FOR RONEY!!!
OOOOOOONNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
TTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
TTTTTTTTTTHRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!
(DING! DING! DING!)
(‘Praise The Lord’ by Bandokay hits the speakers, to a hugely mixed reaction. Even the announcer, Bella Braxton, is shocked – no pun intended. Charlie Marr slowly rolls away, as officials rush down to remove the car battery from the pool of water. The entire arena is in disbelief at what they just witnessed. The camera pans back over to Charlie, who is barely on his feet – only standing with assistance from the top rope – and he has a satisfied grin on his face, knowing that he won. He would later be handed the Hardcore Championship from the referee.)
Bella Braxton: HERE IS YOUR WINNER… AND STIIIIIILL EAW HARDCORE CHAMPION…. CHARRLIEEEEEEEEEE MAAAAAAAAARRRRR!!!
Stew-O: What… what did we just witness? This entire match was completely brutal, however, that ending was next level. Moreover, Ronan Malosi is lucky to be ALIVE right now! Our great EAW doctors are going to be given a challenge tonight, but let’s just hope Ronan is in good shape for next week! However, we can’t gloss on Ronan’s health right now. This is the Hardcore Championship we are talking about. Elitists must do anything and everything in order to come out on top, and that is exactly what Charlie Marr did. He did EVERYTHING. Razor blades on desk fans, plastic bags and barbed wires, even using Ronan’s mistake with his car against him! Ronan was able to keep up, but nobody has been able to out-Hardcore Charlie Marr. Not in the slightest.
Gavin Kirkland: It pains me to say, but nobody has. Other than my Limommy but we don’t need to talk about that! Charlie has been bringing the heat when it comes to these matches, and after that finish, I’m not sure who can top him when it comes to the psycho factor! There’s not a single Elitist on this brand who is more sadistic – barbaric – than Charlie Marr! That’s why he is the Hardcore Champion STILL after a hellatious battle with Ronan Malosi! Ronan did great tonight, but it wasn’t good enough to knock down The Man of Always!
Stew-O: Expanding on that though, Gavin; let’s not take anything away from Ronan! Countless people have named him a laughing stock, but after this performance, those claims are absolutely obsolete, and anybody who disagrees is simply wrong, and trying to bandwagon. He just pushed a surefire future Hall of Famer to his limits, and almost took his title on multiple separate occasions! Not to mention he started this match as he usually does, cowardly. But he was FORCED to fight, and still kept up. That is the foundations for a great Season 16, and Ronan Malosi is undoubtedly set for the rest of this one. Nobody can tell him that he hasn’t stepped up, even if he walked out the loser. Regardless, though, congratulations to Charlie Marr!
Persephone: That match was a classic! That was the best match I’ve seen in a while! Seriously, can we have more matches like this?
(As Charlie Marr stands in the center of the ring, Charlie raises his Hardcore Championship high in the air. The camera would slowly zoom in on them, before fading out to darkness.)
(A commercial for Ronan Malosi’s pronunciation classes plays, where he pronounces “Ether” as if he were saying “Heather”; “DEDEDE” as if it was “Da Deed”, and “Monaghan” as if it was “Moan Again.” Ayo.)
(Battle of Egypt III: Alexandria Falls fades to the backstage area of the Borg El Arab Stadium to show Friday Night Dynasty’s head interviewer Michael Belfort standing by. He’s in front of a generic EAW backdrop with a smile on his face as he begins to speak.)
Michael Belfort: What a night it has been here in Alexandria and the thrill of it all is that there’s more to come as the night goes on. But right now, please welcome my guest at this time, he is “The Barbaric Carnivore”, Terry Chambers!
(The crowd gives a cheer as Terry Chambers enters the shot. He’s dressed with a casual attire fitted on him, as he gives a nod to Michael.)
Terry Chambers: What’s up Mike?
Michael Belfort: Well firstly, going back to what happened two weeks ago, we saw that you were the first entrant in the Grand Rampage match. You then damn near went all the way lasting until the very last entrant. Any thoughts on that?
Terry Chambers: Well, what is there really to say? It is what it is, I wanted that match more than anything. I wanted that full circle moment of me conquering those demons on a stage that has haunted me in the past. I wanted to walk out of Pain for Pride with my second World Championship, but it just wasn’t meant to be as of this moment. I’m not mad about it either because one or two is a tough spot to be in and I made the most out of it and showed just how much of a threat I still am on this roster. It’s done now and there’s no need to cry over spilled milk, am I going to be angry that I came up short? Nah, just learn to live with it and keep grinding towards that second World Championship. Who knows, maybe if I had a Myles or Minerva in there to watch my back throughout, things would have been different In the end :mjgrin:
Michael Belfort: This season has been somewhat of a rocky road to say the least for you. Since your return at Territorial Invasion 2021 after a short hiatus post Pain For Pride, most things haven’t gone your way. Do you want to comment on that?
Terry Chambers: When I came back, my one and only goal was to become World Champion again, because I had so much to prove after my first reign. And, I will admit people were right in saying I came back too soon. That performance in Grand Warfare could have been a lot better, then suffering losses to Johnny and such, it fucking sucked. But at Road to Redemption, it felt like a switch just flipped in me. I was confident enough to challenge Viz, and I gave fellow Detroit man a match he won’t forget at King Of Elite, and one I didn’t either because once again, I somehow snatched defeat from the jaws of victory. Alex Myers questioned my legacy and wanted to be the one to take me out, and they found out why that wasn’t as easy a task as they thought as I broke my FPV dry spell hitting two birds with one stone. After that of course, Grand Rampage, impressive performance or not, I came up short, as I watched my goal slip away from me. Again, I’m not mad because I had my chances this season, and I just flat out came up short, but it’s not going to stop me in my quest long term. And with the goal of the world championship gone at least for this season, it seems I’m at a crossroads on what my path to Pain for Pride is.
Michael Belfort: What is that path you think?
Terry Chambers: Well, my focus now is just trying to bookend this rocky season on a great note, while also rebounding from that humiliation last year. We all saw how things went for me at Pain for Pride against Ahren. To this day it leaves me with a sour ass taste in my mouth. I let my incredible season come to a close like that and I vow to bounce back this year by any means necessary. Over the past few months. I’ve just been finding that spark inside me again, something I feel I lost around this time a year ago, and most importantly, just having fun again and taking pride in what I do. For quite a bit of time, it felt like. I was just “here.” I was becoming someone I hated, and I knew changes had to be made. The classic saying goes, it’s about how you finish, and I WILL finish this season strong. At Pain for Pride, it’s quite simple really….I wanna fight. I want somebody to bring me that fight. I want to get that door taste out of my mouth from last year. I’m throwing out an open challenge to anybody in the locker room to fight me at Pain for Pride.
(The crowd gives a roar of approval.)
Terry Chambers: I don’t want somebody just looking to be on the card and accepting only because they have to settle, because if that’s the case, they’re going to get ran the fuck over. I want somebody desperate to create a moment for themselves on the biggest stage possible. With how things went for me last year and the roll I’ve been on lately, I will accept nothing less than victory and show just how dangerous I plan to be next season, with capturing my second world championship still in front of me. So in closing, I’ll leave everybody off with this, if you don’t wanna fight, don’t bother wasting my time.
Michael Belfort: Wow! Well, thank you for your time tonight and best of luck to you at Pain for Pride.
Terry Chambers: Pleasure Mike.
(Terry gives another nod before walking out of the frame.)
Michael Belfort: You heard it here first. Terry has thrown out an open challenge with the main message being if you aren’t ready for a fight, don’t waste his time. Who’s going to answer it? We’ll find that out in due time but right now, we take you back down to ringside for our next match!
(The camera transitions back to the ringside area.)
Bella Braxton: The following contest is scheduled for one fall! AND IT IS FOR THE EAW ANSWERS WORLD CHAMPIONSHIP!!
( The crowd explodes in joy following the announcement. “The Rumbling” by SiM begins to play and the Borg El Arab Stadium is filled to the brim with boos. The camera zooms in on the stage where Theron Nikolas slowly walks into the frame. Red patterned leather coat and pants, Nikolas stands stoically on the stage sporting his usual cold smirk. He takes a couple of seconds to observe the atmosphere before making his valiant march down the ramp. )
Bella Braxton: INTRODUCING THE CHALLENGER! From Edmonton, Alberta, Canada, weighing in at 224 pounds…. THERON… NIKOOOOLASSS!!
Stew-O: It has been roughly over a year since Theron Nikolas made his return in the Grand Rampage. The EAW Universe has witnessed Nikolas go through a myriad of wins and losses. This is a man that has been able to maintain his position in the upper echelons. He has been in the main events, the marquees, but the hunt for the EAW Answers World Championship has been the death of him. Nikolas has been given multiple opportunities to add to his decorated career, but he has been unable. Some say that Nikolas is out of his element, but I have to believe that Showdown holds the best world championship competition. It is all about mentality, and Nikolas must be psychologically superior to his opponents. Kassidy Heart was a cerebral assassin. Almost nobody could poke through the grand vanity of The Mauler, but Nikolas stands across the ring from the man who could solve that puzzle. TLA, a man who ias nonchalant as he is dangerous inside that squared circle, is the man that Nikolas needs to beat to climb that pinnacle once again. Can Theron Nikolas do it?
Persephone: This is a question that has popped up several times this season. Loss after losses, Nikolas’ mindset seems to be more conflicted than ever. It seems to be more lost in limbo than ever. He vowed that he will not walk out of this match as the same person he walked into it as. Without the EAW Answers World Champion, Saturday nights will be subject to a different Theron Nikolas. I am sure TLA recognizes the weight of a message so ominous. Nikolas intends on exercising his demons. This is a man who is hell bent on being world champion. He has nothing to lose. This might be his last stand. This might be his last world championship opportunity for the time being. Nikolas believes he doesn’t deserve this world championship, but you best bet that doesn’t imply that he will not be at his best game. Nikolas is going to give it all, but the question still remains. Can Theron Nikolas do it? Can Theron Nikolas’ perform at a level where it will bring him success?
Gavin Kirkland: I will give you an answer so we don’t keep you two waiting. He won’t. Theron Nikolas simply does not have what it takes anymore. It is that simple.
( Theron Nikolas stops leaning against the corner turnbuckles and waits in the center of the ring. He rolls his eyes to the thunderous pop that is prompted by “Ambitionz az a Ridah” by Tupac. TLA quickly hops onto the stage, sporting Egyption flag colors and holding the EAW Answers World Championship around waist. TLA unhooks the championship and raises it overhead as he makes his way down towards the squared circle. )
Bella Braxton: AND HIS OPPONENT! Residing in The Poon Palace, weighing in at 210 pounds.. HE IS THE EAW ANSWERS WORLD CHAMPION… “LA PANTERA SEXUAL,..” T…. L….. A!!!!
Stew-O: Being the first individual to pin Kassidy Heart for what felt like an eternity, TLA has been quick to establish himself as the new face of Elite Answers Wrestling. He has accomplished what people have deemed impossible. He has defended it in that life-threatening Towering Inferno. He has already defended it against the likes of Adam Lucas and Limmy Monaghan. His one final stop before defending the world championship for the first time in his career at Pain For Pride is Theron Nikolas. TLA wants the best version out of him. Rain or shine, Nikolas will bring the best version of himself, but it is up to Nikolas whether he wants to do that or not. TLA is in his prime. He is on the run of his life. The desire to enter Pain For Pride as world champion is strong within him. TLA was inducted into the Hall of Fame long ago, but we have come to learn that he has a desire to keep moving forward and expanding his portfolio. TLA wants to defend this championship at Pain For Pride. He wants to move on and shut Impact once and for all, but Theron Nikolas stands in his way.
Gavin Kirkland: I might be the first to say this. TLA is one of the greatest professional wrestlers of all time. I don’t say that because he was responsible for freeing Showdown from Kassidy Heart’s reign of terror, but because he brought me over to The Poon Palace to meet all of the hoes and shit. TLA is the greatest of all time for that, and he should have no problem beating the has-been that is Theron Nikolas. People are forgetting TLA is the Baddest Hombre on the Planet! He is The Franchise! He is EAW! TLA is automatically the greatest EAW Answers World Champion of all time, but that is until Limmy Monaghan takes it from him. I say Hurricane Hawk, give Monaghan another title shot! Please? You know what the match rating was for the Super Showdown match? Five stars! Five stars! Come on!
Persephone: There is a lot of controversy surrounding what happened with TLA’s last championship defense. TLA was able to pin Adam Lucas down at Grand Rampage, but the referee did not notice that Lucas’ foot was on the ropes. TLA has since moved on, but who knows because Adam Lucas might be looking at this match. The land of Elite is extremely unpredictable. TLA and Theron Nikolas are fighting for the opportunity to walk into Pain For Pride as the world champion. TLA wants to make history and main event Pain For Pride for the very first time.. Nikolas wants to get another taste of that sweet nectar. This is the last stand between both individuals. It is up to whoever wants it most.
( DING! DING! DING!)
Stew-O: The EAW Answers World Championship is up for grabs. TLA versus Theron Nikolas. A match of the year candidate coming right up. Who wants the championship more? Who wants to main event Pain For Pride as world champion more? Who will Impact face at Pain For Pride? We are about to get those answers as TLA and Theron Nikolas aren’t in a hurry and walk around the ring. No immediate need to get into the thick of things as they bask in the. “T! L! A” and “LET’S GO THERON!” chants going back and forth.
Gavin Kirkland: Hurry the fuck up already! The champion and challenger engage in a collar-and-elbow tie-up. Nikolas overpowers TLA and LEANS THE CHAMPION DOWN INTO AN INVERTED STO! GOD’S REQUIEM ALREADY! THIS COULD ALREADY BE IT! NO WAY!
Stew-O: NO! TLA IMMEDIATELY DROPS TO THE GROUND AND ROLLS OVER TO THE CORNER IN RETREAT! Theron Nikolas crouches down and gestures with his fingers that TLA’s EAW Answers World Championship reign could have been crushed in the matter of seconds! TLA looks down and back up with a smirk on his face. In a matter of seconds, TLA’s championship reign could have poofed into dust right there! Nikolas with a little mind games, but TLA quickly mentally shakes it off and both competitors meet in the center of the ring again. They grab each other’s arms for a potential test of strength, but TLA suckered him and twisted his wrist. Nikolas rolls into the ground, gets back up and reverses the wrist lock into a standing headlock. TLA pushes Nikolas into the ropes and off Nikolas goes! NIKOLAS REBOUNDS OFF THE ROPES AND FLOORS TLA WITH A SHOULDER BLOCK! Nikolas smirks down before running the ropes! He jumps over TLA and rebounds off the topes towards a leapfrogging champion!
Persephone: TLA leapfrogs over Nikolas! Nikolas stays right behind TLA! HE YANKS DOWN ON THE CHAMPION’S HAIR!! AND GOES THE BACK OF HIS HEAD ON THE CANVAS WITH A HUGE THUD! Nikolas hovers over TLA, but TLA gets both of his feet up and thrusts Nikolas away. Both competitors get up to their feet! TLA floors Nikolas with a drag, but the dexterity of Nikolas ashe counters the arm drag last second into a headlock. Headlock takedown from the challenger as the champion now is up on a vertical base. Nikolas continues to wrench him with headlock before TLA presses down his left foot onto the back of his left knee. AND THEN TLA SUDDENLY LIFTS NIKOLAS INTO THE AIR!! BACK SUPLEX!! NO! NIKOLAS REVERSES IT BY CAPTURING HIS LEGS WITH A LEG SCISSOR AND TRAPS THE CHAMPION INSIDE OF A HEEL HOOK!
Gavin Kirkland: Theron Nikolas with a reversal to a reversal, but TLA answers back and quickly escapes out of the heel hook, and he holds TLA by the head! AND HE LOOKS TO CINCH IN A DRAGON SLEEPER!! BUT NIKOLAS QUICKLY GETS TO A VERTICAL BASE AND THROWS TLA OVER HIS HEAD!! AND HE PICKS TLA UP IN A WAIST LOCK!! TLA WITH A STANDING SWITCH! NIKOLAS TRIES TO ESCAPE AS HE RUNS INTO THE ROPES WITH TLA AROUND HIS WAIST!! AND TLA BRINGS NIKOLAS DOWN WITH AN O-CONNOR ROLL!! AND TLA BENTS INTO A SEXY ARCH TO PIN BOTH SHOULDERS DOWN TO THE MAT!!
ONNNNEEE!!
Stew-O: THERON NIKOLAS GRABS HIS LEGS AND SHOVES HIM OFF!! AND TLA FALLS RIGHT BESIDE HIM!! AND NIKOLAS QUICKLY CAPITALIZES AND HOOKS BOTH ARMS!! CRUCIFIX PIN!
ONEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
Stew-O: IMMEDIATE KICK-OUT FROM THE CHAMPION! BOTH COMPETITORS EMERGE TO THEIR FEET! NIKOLAS STRIKES FIRST WITH AN ELBOW SMASH THAT TAKES BACK THE CHAMPION A COUPLE OF STEPS! Nikolas twists his arm and Irish whips TLA into the ropes! Nikolas looks to choreograph a back body drop! TLA athletically hovers and spins overhead and off his shoulders. Nikolas turns around and tries to rectify his mistake with a clothesline! TLA ducks it and rebounds off the ropes! HE GOES FOR A HURRICANRANA! NIKOLAS PUSHES HIM OFF HIM AT THE LAST SECOND!! TLA LUCKILY LANDS ON HIS FEET, BUT NIKOLAS KICKS THE MIDSECTION AND GETS THE FRONT FACE LOCK! SNAP DDT!! NO!! TLA GRABS HIS ARMS, TWISTS OUT OF THE DDT AND CONNECTS WITH A ROUNDHOUSE KICK TO THE CHEST! Nikolas is staggered as TLA now goes for a suplex! He has him up! Nikolas tilts to the side and avoids the suplex. Nikolas wraps his arms around the shoulders! GERMAN SUPLEX! TLA SLAPS THE WRISTS AWAY! AND HE GOES FOR A BACK ELBOW!! TLA MISSES AS HE LUNGES RIGHT INTO AN INVERTED STO SIDELOCK!! AND NIKOLAS DRIVES HIS BACK INTO THE KNEE WITH A STO BACKBREAKER!!
Persephone: Theron Nikolas does not go for a cover as he acknowledges that it will definitely not be enough to win him the world championship. Nikolas holds his wrist and brings him up to his feet. Nikolas with a kick to the midsection, a kick to the face, and then followed by a forearm smash to the head. Nikolas picks him up into a fireman’s carry! TLA WITH ELBOWS TO THE BACK OF THE HEAD! TLA gets off his shoulders and goes for a Mexican uppercut! Nikolas reverses it and tries to ground him with a backslide pin! BUT TLA SOLELY HOOKS ONE OF THE ARMS FIRST AND BRINGS HIM DOWN WITH AN ARM DRAG!! AND TLA TRIES TO TRANSITION IT SEAMLESSLY INTO THE CROSSED PATHS! CROSS ARMBREAKER INBOUND, BUT NIKOLAS ROTATES AND GOES FOR A DEADLIFT GERMAN SUPLEX!! TLA WITH ELBOWS TO THE FACE, BUT NIKOLAS ABSORBS THEM AND THROWS HIM DOWN ANYWAYS!! GERMAN SUPLEX!
Stew-O: TLA COUNTERS IT WITH A WHEELBARROW SCISSORS! AND NIKOLAS GOES FACE FIRST AND IS NOW SLUMPED UP AGAINST THE MIDDLE ROPE!! EVERYONE HERE IN EGYPT KNOWS WHAT COMES NEXT AS TLA RUNS THE ROPES!! AS HE LOOKS TO DIAL UP THE 305! NO!! NIKOLAS REVERSES THE TIGER FEINT KICK BY FALLING TO THE CANVAS! TLA SWINGS THROUGH THE ROPES AND MEETS A SWINGING ENZIGURI TO THE FACE ON THE APRON FROM INSIDE THE RING!! TLA IS STUNNED AGAINST THE ROPES AS NIKOLAS STEPS ONTO THE SECOND ROPE AND LOOKS TO BRING THE CHAMPION BACK INTO THE RING WITH AUTHORITY!
Persephone: I BELIEVE THE CHAMPION MAY BE AIMING FOR A DEADLIFT SUPLEX FROM THE APRON INTO THE RING!! BUT TLA SLINGSHOTS HIMSELF UNDER THE BOTTOM ROPE AND SLIDES INTO THE RING!! AND NIKOLAS IS DISCOMBOBULATED BY HIS HASTE MOVEMENT!! AND TLA QUICKLY COMES FROM BEHIND AND LOOKS TO TAKE THE FOUNDATION BENEATH HIS FEET!! BUT NIKOLAS ONE STEP AHEAD WHEELS HIS FOOT AND SMACKS TLA IN THE HEAD! TLA IS STILL ON HIS FEET AS HE REELS BACK IN!! AND NIKOLAS WITH ANOTHER KICK TO THE FACE THAT DOES THE DAMAGE AND LAYS TLA ON HIS BACK!! WHAT WILL NIKOLAS DO AS THIS DOOR OF OPPORTUNITY IS WIDE OPEN FOR THE CHALLENGER!
Stew-O: NIKOLAS JUMPS FROM THE SECOND ROPE AND SPRINGS OFF THE TOP ROPE!! AND HE TURNS DIRECTION IN MID-AIR!! AND HE LANDS A TWISTING VARIATION OF THE SIX-STAR FROG SPLASH ONTO THE CHEST!! A MODIFIED FROG SPLASH AS NIKOLAS DRIVES THE AIR OUT OF THE STOMACH OF THE REIGNING WORLD CHAMPION! THERON NIKOLAS PULLING OUT NEW MOVES OUT OF HIS ARSENAL AS HE HOOKS BOTH LEGS!! FOR THE EAW ANSWERS WORLD CHAMPIONSHIP!
ONEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!
TWOOOOOOOOOOO-
Gavin Kirkland: TLA THROWS HIS SHOULDER UP AT TWO! Theron Nikolas quickly brings TLA up to his feet and presses him up against the ropes. He hooks his left arm over the top rope, trapping it temporarily! AND HE BEGINS TO STOMP THE LIVING SHIT OUT OF THE MIDSECTION OUT OF THE WORLD CHAMPION!! THERON NIKOLAS PUTTING SOME HATER ENERGY INTO THESE STOMPS AS HE IS CAVING IN A MUDHOLE INTO THE WORLD CHAMPION!! COME ON!! TLA!! DO A BACKFLIP EVASION OUT OF THIS!! I KNOW YOU GOT THIS IN YOU CHAMP!! TLA begins to be subjected to these continuous stomps to the midsections before the referee finally takes these matters into his own hand and separates the champion! Nikolas composes himself after unloading those strikes before he zones in on TLA using the ropes to get up to his feet. AND THERON NIKOLAS LOOKS FOR A BIG SHOOT KICK IN THE CORNER!
Stew-O: TLA SNATCHES HIS FOOT!! HE WHIPS IT TO THE SIDE AND GETS THE FOOT STUCK ON THE TOP ROPE!! AND TLA JUMPS IN ROTATION!! AND DRIVES HIS FOOT INTO THE BACK OF THE CHALLENGER’S HEAD WITH A JUMPING SPINNING HEEL KICK!! THERON NIKOLAS GETS TAKEN OFF HIS FEET AND IS NOW RIGHT DOWN IN FRONT OF THE CORNER TURNBUCKLES! TLA WITH A METAPHORICAL LIGHT BULB POPPING UP OVER HIS HEAD AS HE NOW PLACES HIS HANDS ON THE ROPES IN THE CORNER TURNBUCKLES!
Gavin Kirkland: WHAT IS THE WORLD CHAMPION THINKING HERE!?!? TLA ELEVATES INTO A HEADSTAND ON THE TOP TURNBUCKLE!! WHAT THE HELL IS HE THINKING HERE!?!? OH MY GOD!! HE TRANSITIONS THE CORNER HANDSTAND INTO A SPLIT-LEGGED MOONSAULT ONTO THE CHALLENGER!! TLA SHOWCASING HIS LUCHADORE ROOTS FROM MEXICO AS HE LANDS THAT SENSATIONAL VARIATION OF THE MOONSAULT!! TLA FLATTENS THE CHALLENGER BEFORE HE IMPLEMENTS A SIDE COVER!
ONEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
TWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!
Stew-O: KICK-OUT! TLA quickly engages a seated wrist lock smack dab in the center of the ring. Nikolas begins to fight out of it by getting up to a vertical base and directing blows to the side! TLA stops his resistance with a knee strike to the midsection. He scoops him up for a slam! Nikolas hovers over his shoulders and throws him into the ropes! TLA FLIPS INTO THE ROPES AND RESTS HORIZONTALLY ACROSS THE SECOND ROPE!! THERE IS THE SHOWMANSHIP OF THE WORLD CHAMPION AS HE JUST TAUNTS THE CHALLENGER FROM THE ROPES!!! AND NIKOLAS LOOKS TO BLINDSIDE HIM!! BUT TLA GETS OFF THE ROPES, CATCHES HIS ARM OVER THE ROPES AND APPLIES A ROPE-HUNG ARM TRIANGLE!! THE REFEREE COUNTING TO FIVE AS NIKOLAS SCREAMS IN PAIN!
Persephone: TLA lets go of the arm triangle and climbs onto the apron. Nikolas holds onto his left arm, which is ironically the same arm that Kassidy Heart nearly torn off earlier this season. TLA springboards onto the top rope! AND HE GOES FOR A MISSILE DROPKICK TO THE BACK!! AND IT SENDS NIKOLAS TOWARDS THE MIDDLE ROPE!! THE CROWD GETS CRAZY AS TLA SIGNALS FOR IT YET AGAIN!! WILL IT BE SECOND TIME, THE CHARM!?!? YES IT WILL BE!! TLA CONNECTS WITH THE 305! THE TIGER FEINT KICK AS NIKOLAS GETS BLASTED BACK INTO THE MIDDLE OF THE RING!!
Gavin Kirkland: THE MEXICAN CHAMPION NOW HASTILY CLIMBS TO THE TOP TURNBUCKLE!! NIKOLAS IS LAID OUT IN THE MIDDLE OF THE RING!! AND TLA SOARS OFF THE TOP ROPE! AND HE CONNECTS WITH THE 420! THE SHOOTING STAR SPLASH INTO THE HEART OF THE CHALLENGER AS TLA HAS THE LATERAL PRESS!! COULD TLA DEFEND HIS CHAMPIONSHIP WITH THIS?!?
ONEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!
TWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!
T-
Stew-O: KICK-OUT! TLA connected with his signature tiger feint kick and followed it up with a picture-perfect top-rope shooting star splash. It was not enough to put away the challenger, but TLA looks to have plans to do such right now. The champion brings Nikolas up to his feet and he rests him up against the ropes! TLA goes for a Mexican uppercut! NIKOLAS COUNTERS IT AGAIN BUT CATCHING HIS ARM!! AND HE BLASTS THE JAW OF THE CHAMPION WITH A HEAVY FOREARM SMASH! TLA is temporarily stunned as Nikolas sits up on the top turnbuckle! AND TLA RETALIATES WITH A ROPE-ASSISTED ENZIGURI FROM OUT OF NOWHERE! TLA has been unable to connect with the Mexican Uppercut as it is clear that Theron Nikolas has done his homework to avoid one of his most devastating strikes from the champion’s arsenal.
Persephone: Theron Nikolas is in another dimension on the top turnbuckle as TLA climbs up to join him. Both champion and challenger are in a precarious position as TLA LOOKS TO GO FOR SOME AVALANCHE MANEUVER!! TLA WITH A MEXICAN UPPERCUT ON THE TOP TURNBUCKLE!! BUT NIKOLAS DUCKS HIS HEAD AT THE LAST SECOND!! TLA MISSES AND NIKOLAS WITH A HEADBUTT TO THE FACE!! TLA IS DISCOMBOBULATED BY TEH HEADBUTT AS NIKOLAS QUICKLY GRABS HIM ON THE TOP TURNBUCKLE! HE HOOKS HIS LEFT LEG INSIDE!! AND HE LIFTS HIM UP!! AND NIKOLAS CONNECTS WITH AN AVALANCHE INSIDE LEG HOOK LIFTING SPINNING FISHERMAN’S NECKBREAKER!! NIKOLAS GOING ALL OUT TONIGHT AS HE GOES OVER FOR THE HOOK OF THE LEG!! BOTH SHOULDERS ARE DOWN!
ONEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!
TWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!
TH-
Stew-O: TLA HOISTS HIS SHOULDER UP AT TWO! TLA gets up and impatiently crouches in the corner in anticipation for the challenger. Nikolas is bent over as TLA COMES OVER AND CARTWHEELS OVER! CARTWHEEL INTO THE CARTEL KICK! NOOO!! TLA LANDS ON HIS FEET AS HE MISSED AND GETS ROCKED WITH A FLUSH SUPERKICK COURTESY OF THE CHALLENGER! AND NIKOLAS GOES FOR THE KNEE STRIKE! TLA COUNTERS IT BY DUCKING UNDERNEATH AND ROLLING HIM UP INTO A POWERBOMB POSITION! BUT THERON THROWS HIM OVER HIS HEAD! TLA TURNS IT INTO A SUNSET FLIP!!
ONEEEEEE!!!
TWOOOO!!
Persephone: NIKOLAS POWERS OUT, AND ROLLS ON TOP OF HIM INTO A BACK TO BELLY PIN!
ONEEEEE!!
TWOOOO!!
Gavin Kirkland: TLA POWERS OUT AND ARCHES UPWARDS WHILE MAINTAINING A WAIST HOLD ONTO THE CHALLENGER! AND HE TWISTS NIKOLAS AROUND AND HOOKS BOTH SHOULDERS! BOTH MEN FIGHTING FOR A BACKSLIDE PIN! TLA NEARLY PULLS THERON OVER, BUT THERON PLANTS HIS FEET BACK AND TRIES TO BACKSLIDE TLA!
Stew-O: THERON NIKOLAS IS UNABLE TO LIFT HIM OVER! Both men are up on a vertical base and continue to be in a tug of war! NIKOLAS KICKS BACK AND TLA LOSES BALANCE! AND NIKOLAS LOOKS TO PIN HIM DOWN WITH A BACKSIDE! BUT TLA USES THE MOMENTUM OF THE SLIDE TO FLIP OVER AND PULLS NIKOLAS HEAD IN BETWEEN HIS LEGS! AND HE LOOKS FOR THE MEXICAN DESTROYER!
Persephone: BUT NIKOLAS HOISTS HIM UP! AND DRIVES THE CHAMP DOWN WITH AUTHORITY WITH AN ALABAMA INCEST SLAM!! TLA WAS BLOODY FOLDED LIKE AN ACCORDION AS NIKOLAS NOW REBOUNDS OFF THE ROPES! AND HE BLASTS THROUGH TLA WITH THE DOUBLE KNEES! HEADHUNTER DELIVERED AS NIKOLAS CRAWS OVER FOR THE COVER! DO WE HAVE A NEW CHAMPION!
ONEEEEEE!!!
TWOOOOO!!
T-
Stew-O: TLA KICKS OUT! AND NIKOLAS IMMEDIATELY HOISTS HIM UP AND SLAMS HIM DOWN WITH A DEADLIFT SITOUT GUTWRENCH POWERBOMB!! SHOULDERS ARE DOWN YET AGAIN!
ONEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
TWOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
TH-
Persephone: AND THE CHALUPA KICKS OUT!! Theron Nikolas with two devastating maneuvers in a row as he now gets the champion up to his feet. He connects with a left hook to a rib, up for an open hand slap to the face followed by a loaded forearm smash with the left! AND HE SWINGS AROUND FOR A DISCUS CLOTHESLINE! BUT TLA EXPLODES ONTO HIM WITH THE SWAG SHOT! TLA WITH A NASTY OPEN HAND CHOP ACROSS THE FACE AS I COULD SEE THE SWEAT OR THE SHAMPOO FLYING OFF HIS HAIR! NIKOLAS WAS NEARLY KNOCKED UNCONSCIOUS AS HE TRIES TO GRAB ONTO SOMETHING FOR BALANCE!
Stew-O: TLA REBOUNDS OFF THE ROPES! AND NIKOLAS FIRES BACK WITH A SUPERKICK! BUT TLA GRABS HIS FOOT AND SPINS HIM AROUND! AND HE CONNECTS WITH A MEXICAN UPPERCUT! TLA FINALLY CONNECTS AS THE CHAMPION DEALS MORE UPPERCUTS INTO THE FACE OF THE CHALLENGER! AND ANOTHER ONE! AND ANOTHER ONE!! AND ANOTHER ONE!!
Gavin Kirkland: TLA SPINS AROUND! AND HE FLOORS NIKOLAS WITH A DISCUS MEXICAN UPPERCUT! TLA IS EN FUEGO HERE AS HIS ENERGY IS IN TUNE WITH THE RAUCOUS EGYPTIAN CROWD HERE!! TLA NOW PUSHES HIM INTO THE ROPES! NIKOLAS REBOUNDS AND TLA GOES FOR A POP UP MEXICAN UPPERCUT!! THIS HAS TO BE IT!
Stew-O: WHAT THE! NIKOLAS ROTATES AROUND AND COUNTERS THE POP UP BY FALLING INTO TLA AND BRINGING HIM INTO A STO POSITION! AND HE SWINGS FOR THE GODS REQUIEM! BUT TLA KIPS OVER AND FLIPS ONTO HIS FEET! WHAT A COUNTER AS TLA REBOUNDS OFF THE ROPES! AND HE OBLITERATED THE CHALLENGER ON THE GROUND WITH A PRECISION BASEMENT MEXICAN UPPERCUT!
Gavin Kirkland: WAIT! NIKOLAS MOVES OUT OF THE WAY, CAUSING TLA TO FALL BACKWARDS RIGHT INTO THE LEGS OF NIKOLAS!! AND NIKOLAS TRAPS TLA AND APPLIES A SLEEPER HOLD! A REAR NAKED CHOKE HOLD AS NIKOLAS IS LOOKING TO CHOKE HIM OUT! TLA, HOWEVER, UTILIZES HIS POWER AND GETS UP TO HIS FEET WHILST IN THE HOLD!
Persephone: NIKOLAS IS MOUNTED ON HIS BACK LIKE A BACKPACK, APPLYING THE CHOKER, BUT TLA IS POWERING THROUGH THE AGONY!! TLA HAS HIM ON HIS BACK AS HE NOW RUNNING WITH HIM TOWARDS THE CORNER! TLA FLIPS FORWARD AND HE DRIVES NIKOLAS BACK FIRST INTO THE CORNER TURNBUCKLES! YES! NOW END THIS MATCH!!
Stew-O: Leave it up to the world champion to find out a clever way to escape out of a deep situation! TLA with an innovative counter to the sleeper hold as he now gets up to his feet! AND TLA GOES FOR A RUNNING EUROPEAN UPPERCUT! BUT NIKOLAS ROLLS TO THE SIDE AND TLA SMASHES HIS SHOULDER ONTO THE TOP TURNBUCKLE! AND NIKOLAS HOOKS THE SIDE AND FOLLOWS IT UP WITH A HIGH ANGLE URANAGE!
Gavin Kirkland: TLA COUNTERS IT WITH A WHEELBARROW PIN! BUT NIKOLAS SITS DOWN AND PINS TLA DOWN INSTEAD!! UH OH!
ONEEEEEE!!
TWOOOOOO!
THRRRRRRRRR-
Stew-O: TLA PUSHES NIKOLAS OFF HIM! AND NIKOLAS IMMEDIATELY CHARGES INTO TLA! BUT TLA RUNS PAST HIM! AND HE GOES FOR THE TWIST OFF THE TOP TURNBUCKLE INTO THR MEXICAN DESTROYER! BUT NIKOLAS THROWS HIM OFF HIS SHOULDERS! TLA LANDS ON HIS FEET, BUT HE IS MET WITH A SUPERKICK! TLA RESPONDS WITH A SHOOT KICK TO THE JAW! NIKOLAS FALTERS NEAR THE ROPES AS TLA NOW RUNS FULL SPRINT AT HIM!
Persephone: END IT! NIKOLAS LEANS OVER AND TRIES TO SEND HIM OVER THE TOP ROPE WITH A BACK BODY DROP! WAIT WHAT!?! TLA HANDSPRINGS HIS UPPER BODY OFF THE ROPES AND BOOMERANGS BACK! AND HE UNEXPECTEDLY PICKS NIKOLAS UP INTO A POWERBOMB! AND HE DROPS HIM DOWN WITH A RELEASE POWERBOMB AS BOTH COMPETITORS ARE DOWN AND OUT!
Stew-O: A handspring powerbomb courtesy of the world champion, but TLA did not have the remaining energy to turn it into a sit-out pin as he remains floored with his challenger. Not for long as TLA and Nikolas depend on each other to get up to their feet! They are head to head as they now EXCHANGE FOREARMS! TLA! NIKOLAS! TLA! NIKOLAS! TLA! NIKOLAS! TLA! TLA! AND TLA NOW GOES FOR A DISCUS FOREARM SMASH! BUT NIKOLAS LAWNMOWERS OVER HIM WITH A BURNING LARIAT! WHAT A LARIAT AS NIKOLAS NOW PULLS HIM UP FOR THE GODS REQUIEM!
Gavin Kirkland: TLA USES THE MOMENTUM OF THE PULL TO CONNECT WITH A MEXICAN UPPERCUT! AND TLA NOW GOES AROUND THE WAIST AND SPINS HIM AROUND LIKE A RIPCORD! AND SENDS NIKOLAS REELING THROUGH THE ROPED WITH A RIPCORD MEXICAN UPPERCUT! DAMN!
Stew-O: NIKOLAS SLOWLY GETS UP TO HIS FEET AT RINGSIDE! TLA RUNS THE ROPES! TLA STEPS UP AND SOARS OFF THE TOP TURNBUCKLE! AND HE ROTATES AROUND IN MID AIR AND FLATTENS THE CHALLENGER BELOW WITH A MARVELLOUS CORKSCREW PLANCHA!!! OH MY GOD
Gavin Kirkland: TLA BRINGS HIM BACK INTO THE RING! AND HE NOW CLIMBS TO THE TOP TURNBUCKLE! AND HE GOES FOR THE BURNOUT! CORKSCREW 720 SENTON INCOMING!
AND NOW TLA FLIPS OFF THE TOP TURNBUCKLE! NIKOLAS HAS YET TO MOVE!
Stew-O: NIKOLAS BRINGS HIS KNEES UP AT THE LAST SECOND! OH MY GOD!! AND NOW NIKOLAS CRADLES THE CHAMPION AND FOLDS HIM OVER! COVER!! NOT LIKE THIS!!
ONEEEEEEEE!!
TWOOOOOOOO!!
THREEEEEEEEEE!!
Gavin Kirkland: TLA POWERS OUT! NIKOLAS CAN NOT BELIEVE IT AS HE BEGINS TO HOLD HIM BY BOTH OF HIS HANDS! AND HE BEGINS TO STOMP THE LIVING HELL OUT OF HIS HEAD!! WRIST LOCK STOMPS AS HE DELIVERS A FINAL STOMP BEFORE PULLING HIM UP FOR THE GOD’S REQUIEM!
Stew-O: TLA BRINGS HIS ENTIRE LOWER BODY UPWARDS AND ROLLS THERON INTO THE GROUND! AND HE LOOKS FOR CROSSED PATHS! CROSS ARMBREAKER, BUT NIKOLAS GETS HIS FEET ON THE BOTTOM ROPEb TLA LETS GO AND TRIES TO LURE HIM INTO THE CENTER OF THE RING! BUT NIKOLAS PUSHES HIM TOWARDS THE TOPES AND TLA SNAPS HIS HEAD AGAINST THE MIDDLE ROPE!
Gavin Kirkland: TLA stumbles and falls through the ropes. He must be disoriented by the collision into the ropes as Nikolas now joins him on the apron. WAIT! TLA TRAPS HIS HEAD IN BETWEEN HIS LEGS! AND HE SLINGS HIMSELF UPWARDS VIA THE ROPES AND HE SPIKES THERON’S HEAD ON THE APRON WITH A PENDULUM PILEDRIVER THROUGH THE ROPES! TLA PUSHES AN UNCONSCIOUS THERON INTO THE RING!
Stew-O: TLA IS NOT DONE YET! HE WANTS TO MAKE THERON LEARN TO NEVER UNDERESTIMATE LA PANTERA SEXUAL! AND TLA NOW HAS HIM IN POSITION! AND HE FLIPS HIM OVER AND DRILLS HIM WITH A MEXICAN DESTROYER!
Gavin Kirkland: AND TLA HOOKS THE LEG WITH CONVICTION!
ONEEEE!!
TWOOOO!!
THREEEE!!!
( DING! DING! DING! )
( “Ambitionz az a Ridah” by Tupac echoes throughout the Borg El Arab Stadium as TLA lets go of Theron Nikolas’ left leg in relief. TLA rolls up to his feet, receives his EAW Answers World Championship and immediately celebrates on the top turnbuckle. Theron Nikolas rolls under the bottom rope and splatters onto the ringside floor while TLA holds his championship over his head. )
Bella Braxton: HERE IS YOUR WINNER.. AND STILL EAW ANSWERS WORLD CHAMPION.. T… L.. AA!!!
Eve: TLA successfully retains his championship in an extremely competetive bout! Nikolas and TLA upped the ante as they brought the best of their abilities tonight! They pushed each other out of their comfort zone, and it all left up to TLA being more opportunistic and being faster than the challenger.
Persephone: It is over! Now can we get to the part where the EAW logo buzzes!
Gavin Kirkland: Shut up! whore! We have more matches to go through first! I have a question first. What is next for Theron Nikolas? BRO HAS LOST EVERY BIG MATCH SO HE FUCKING SUCKS! Fire him Hawk!
Stew-O: We don’t know, but you know what we do know now! It is now official that TLA and Impact will face at the fifteenth Pain For Pride for the EAW Answers World Championship! Congratulations to TLA, and I am sure everyone is excited to see them two revisit their feud from years back.
( Theron Nikolas stares into the camera with a cold sorrow before it changes and ends on a shot of TLA celebrating on the announce tables )
(As Battle of Egypt returns, the camera fades to the stage ‘Mona Lisa’ by Lil Wayne and Kendrick Lamar hits. This surprises the Egypt crowd, and more cheers than usual are heard as Cleopatra begins to make her way out to the stage with a smile on her face. Cleopatra is seen with a microphone in her hand, and as the mixed reaction continues, Cleopatra begins making her way down the ramp and to the ring.)
Stew-O: Cleopatra is here in Egypt, and I don’t think I should be surprised to see her here tonight, not when the Queen’s Court has such a major match coming up!
Gavin Kirkland: 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍
Persephone: Oh brother. She’s here AND we still have to sit through that big women’s match? This is gonna be a nightmare.
(Cleopatra enters the ring and looks at the fans with a smirk on her face, finally beginning to speak as they quiet down.)
Cleopatra: You couldn’t have Battle of Egypt without the Queen of the Nile.
(The mixed reaction grows loud again, but Cleopatra continues to speak.)
Cleopatra: This season is supposed to be historic for EAW, and there’s nobody that could’ve made Voltage special the way I have when I returned to the ring earlier in the season. This company needs a star like me, and it’s only right that I appear at Battle of Egypt to once again help make this a show worth watching, even if I don’t have a match. It’s #EAW15, and you all deserve the chance to see the women who paved the way for the division we have today. Some of those women will be in that ladder match coming up, and I don’t even need to explain why I’m so interested in that. Women’s wrestling has come a long way and it’s important that it continues to have such a big spotlight in this company. Soon enough one woman is going to win the ladder match and gain number one contendership for the Universal Women’s Championship and gain the right to headline Pain for Pride against Andrea Valentine.. And it’s only right that the winner will be a member of the stable that pushed women’s wrestling further than anybody else.
(While this causes another loud reaction, Cleopatra doesn’t look bothered by the amount of people that actually are booing, obviously confident that a member of the Queen’s Court will win the match.)
Cleopatra: This ladder match might just be one of the biggest women’s matches EAW has ever seen, so there’s no wonder why two members of the Queen’s Court are in such a match. We’re so important to EAW’s history that it’d be a crime to not include us in a match like this, and there’s no doubting that after that ladder match is over, a member of the Queen’s Court will be heading to the main event of Pain for Pride where they will become the Universal Women’s Champion. Soon enough the Queen’s Court will be on top, and while only one of us could win that ladder match and face Andrea Valentine, I might just team up with whoever doesn’t make it, and we might just become the new Unified Tag Team Champions at the biggest show of the year. After all the Queen’s Court has done, this is just what we deserve. Our return to the top started back at Grand Rampage where we established just how great of a team we are even to this day, and soon enough the Queen’s Court will be covered in gold. Could you think of a better way to end Pain for Pride?
(Cleopatra holds her microphone out to the crowd with the grin still on her face, before pulling it back to herself.)
Cleopatra: I didn’t think so. We-
(‘you should see me in a crown’ by Billie Eilish suddenly hits, and this draws another loud mixed reaction. Cleopatra immediately turns towards the stage, and she looks surprised that somebody would actually interrupt her as she was speaking. That person would turn out to be Holly Arrow, who is holding a microphone and has a grin on her face, now unlike Cleopatra, who isn’t very pleased by her appearance.)
Stew-O: HOLLY ARROW IS HERE IN EGYPT!!!! Jake Smith did have two matches on the card tonight and as we all know Holly Arrow was cleared to compete again as announced on Voltage one week ago, but what is she doing out here??
Gavin Kirkland: This might be the best day of my life.
Persephone: She’s probably out here because she’s facing Cleo’s partner Madison Kaline soon. I really wish she didn’t come out here though, this show has already been long and boring, Holly Arrow appearing just makes things ten times worse.
(Holly Arrow steps into the ring, and slowly begins to walk up to Cleopatra. Cleopatra obviously still isn’t happy about Holly Arrow being out here, but Holly Arrow couldn’t seem to care less, beginning to speak.)
Holly Arrow: Actually, I’m interested in that ladder match, too. It’s rare to see so many major names in women’s wrestling all in the same match, and it’ll be pretty exciting seeing them go all out. They all seem as motivated than ever to win the Universal Women’s Championship, and stuff like that usually results in the best matches possible, especially when you have such a great stipulation involved. I think we’re all gonna have a great time watching this match Cleo. In a ladder match anybody could win anything could happen at any time and I learned that from experience, but part of me is actually hoping that you get what you want and a member of the Queen’s Court does win, namely, Madison Kaline.
(Cleopatra still doesn’t look impressed by Holly Arrow’s interruption, but Holly continues.)
Holly Arrow: I think it sounds great. Ladder match winner against some of the biggest names in women’s wrestling, Pain for Pride headliner and Universal Women’s Championship number one contender. It’d be huge for Madison, and it’d be an even bigger win for me. I’ve been gone since Shock Value and I have missed way more time than I would’ve liked to. I missed out on a lot of opportunities and chances to get a great spot on the Pain for Pride card, and now the season is almost over. Now that I have the chance to compete I’m going to do whatever I can to make sure I do make it to Pain for Pride, and beating one of your partners sounds like a great start, doesn’t it?
(Cleopatra has started to become annoyed with Holly Arrow, and finally begins to speak.)
Cleopatra: I wasn’t finished speaking. If you haven’t noticed, I was in the middle of something, so what do you want?
(The grin on Holly’s face hasn’t gone away, and she seems glad to have the opportunity to answer Cleopatra’s question.)
Holly Arrow: Well, getting the chance to face someone like your friend is already pretty great. This is probably going to be one of the bigger matches I’ve had just because of the name Madison Kaline has been able to build before I ever even joined the company, and beating a woman like that sounds like the best possible way for me to return to the ring. I can’t deny how much of an influence the Queen’s Court has had on women’s wrestling, and one thing I like getting the chance to do is test myself against Hall of Famers and see just how much I can hang with the best of them. Soon enough I’m going to beat Madison Kaline and prove that I’ve still got it even after my injury, and since the biggest show of the year is coming up and this season has been all about bringing back names from the past and having these special matches, I think I like the idea of testing myself against another Hall of Famer, and maybe even another member of the Queen’s Court.
(The crowd cheers loudly, but Cleopatra remains silent, not giving Holly Arrow much of a reaction. It takes a little while, but finally Cleopatra does respond.)
Cleopatra: Wow, Holly. You really want to be a female Jake Smith, don’t you?
(The smile is finally wiped off of Holly Arrow’s face, and Cleopatra continues to speak.)
Cleopatra: The last thing you should do is try to be anything like Jake, especially if it means trying to make a name for yourself at the Queen’s Court’s expense. That’s not why we’re here. If you want a match at Pain for Pride so badly, then the 24/7 Battle Royale has your name on it, feel free to take your chances there. If you’re not okay with that then either ask someone else if they’d be willing to entertain you or go back to sitting on the sidelines and watching another major event without you competing on it, because you’re not worth mine or the Queen’s Court’s time, and none of us will be wasting the biggest show of the year on a match against you.
(Cleopatra brushes past Holly as she makes her way out of the ring, and ‘Mona Lisa’ begins to play once again as the crowd gives off a mix of cheers and boos, this time with even more boos as the fans are disappointed by Cleopatra declining the potential match.)
Stew-O: Well it looks like Holly Arrow might’ve been setting her sights on Cleopatra, but in the end Cleopatra wants nothing to do with her! That’s a bit of a disappointing turn of events, but there’s no doubt that someone as talented as Holly Arrow will find her way onto the Pain for Pride card!
Gavin Kirkland: :mjcry:
Persephone: Stop crying. That’s one less match on the Pain for Pride card since we don’t have to worry about ever seeing them wrestle.
Gavin Kirkland: That’s the problem. :mjcry:
(Holly Arrow watches as Cleopatra continues to make her way up the ramp, not even looking back at Holly as she makes her way to the back. Holly Arrow is the last one shown by the camera as it begins to fade out away to show the next match graphic which flashes across the screen!)
(Outside the ring stands Bella Braxton, ready to announce!)
Bella Braxton: The following contest is a Ladder Match, where the first woman to climb a ladder and pull down the contract will go on to Pain for Pride to compete for the Universal Women’s Championship!
(“Unfuckwithable” by Deez Nutz begins to play and out comes Sienna Jade, looking around at the crowd before starting down the ramp!)
Bella Braxton: First, from Calgary, Alberta, Canada… “Unfuckwithable” SIENNA JADE!!!!!
Stew-O: Sienna Jade is just one of the many women making up this amazing lineup of women who’ll be competing tonight for the opportunity to face off against Andrea Valentine at Pain for Pride for the Universal Women’s Championship! And as one of the women who ushered in the Universal Women’s Title, it’d be historic for Sienna Jade to come back and compete for it where it was officially introduced!
Gavin Kirkland: What I know is that I can’t wait to get out of here so I don’t have to see these women compete in body suits! I wanna see some ass!!!
Persephone: How do you still have a job?
Stew-O: That’s a question I wanted to ask the both of you actually.
(“Amerika” by Rammstein begins to play and Sheridan is out next, not looking any way in particular as she seems collected and calm while heading down to the ring.)
Bella Braxton: Next, from München, Deutschland…. “German Efficiency” SHERIDAN MULLER!!!!!
Persephone: I don’t know where they dragged her out from for this #EAW15 mess, but what I do know is that I can’t be bothered to listen to her!
Stew-O: Fortunately, one of us actually does our job! Sheridan has come back and she’s taken on competitors of varying experience, allowing her to showcase just what she can bring to the table in this era and it’s just the kind of thing that could be a launching pad for setting herself up for a big win tonight!
Gavin Kirkland: She’s not as hot as some of opponents or the other women on EAW roster, but I’m sure she’s got something up her sleeve for tonight! You can’t really go into this without preparing yourself to get your hands dirty.
(“O Fortuna” by Carl Orff takes over and Madison comes out to the sound of boos, which she rolls her eyes at before starting down the aisle with a smirk.)
Bella Braxton: From Tampa Bay, Florida… “The Mistress of Death” MADISON KALINE!
Stew-O: Madison already competed for the Universal Women’s Championship back at Reckless Wiring and it looked like she could’ve been well on her way to winning at times, but after coming up short against Andrea, it can only be assumed that she’d love a second opportunity!
Persephone: I can’t stand this bitch, because she really got the Golden Girls back together and it took up so much airtime on Voltage that I couldn’t wait for this all to be over! And to know two of them are in this match now?! It’s gonna take a miracle for me to get through this!
(“Party Goin’ Dumb” by Rico Nasty plays and Astraea makes her way out with a confident grin as she comes dow the ramp!)
Bella Braxton: Making her way to the ring from Chicago, Illinois… ASTRAEA JORDAN!!!!
Stew-O: After defeating Ximena Velasquez in an I Quit Match back at Reckless Wiring, Astraea surely comes into this match ready to go and get even more hardcore than before! Astraea and Sheridan seemed to rightfully assume that alliances could come into play here, and how all that factors in now with the history she has with these women, I’m sure it’s going to be something to witness!
Gavin Kirkland: Just about all these women absolutely hate each other, and if they didn’t before, they certainly do now! Did you hear some of what they had to say to each other this week?!
Persephone: Rich said he’d take notes for me but I still haven’t checked them. I didn’t even ask to be here!
(“Monster” by Kanye West begins to play and the crowd watches on as Kassidy is anticipated coming out from the back….)
Stew-O: :oh:!!!
View post on imgur.com
Crowd: :oh:!!!!!
Bella Braxton: From Sydney, Australia… “The Crown Jewel” KASSIDY HEART!!!!!!
Gavin Kirkland: :oh:!!!!! She’s clearly trying to get on my good side here with this new look, but I won’t be tempted! I won’t! I refuse! I absolutely won’t be! Everything I’ve said about her before now still holds true!
Persephone: I hope one day you get it the fuck together :mjpls:
Stew-O: Well we saw The Jaded Hearts cost The High Rollerz their match earlier in the night, no wonder they were wearing hats, Kassidy was just waiting for the big reveal! With her driven attitude and her new look, Kassidy Heart comes into this match seeking her chance at her third World Championship, and there’s no one I know more who would do absolutely anything to secure that kind of opportunity! She came into the season having defeated Jamie O’Hara at Pain for Pride, and had the Answers World Championship for a historic amount of time before she came to lose it!
Gavin Kirkland: When TLA won at King of Elite :drakelike:!!! But Kassidy is admittedly one of the toughest women in this match and her records speak for themselves; these women are going to have their hands full!
Persephone: I’m hoping she does that thing where she bites someone – it’s the only thing saving this match for me right now.
(“All It Takes For Your Dreams to Come True” by A Skylit Drive begins to play and Amber makes her way out, her eyes fixated on the contract that hangs above the ring before she starts down the ramp with her focus now on the other women.)
Bella Braxton: And finally, from Bronx, New York…. “Dirti Diva” AMBER KEYS!!!!
Stew-O: Amber Keys is coming into this having returned as Queen’s Court drama looked to be unfolding, but somehow among it all, they were able to get themselves on the same page! But now tonight, they’re against each other but if these past few weeks were anything to go by, alliances are going to be a huge factor in this!
Persephone: Which sucks because I was hoping it’d be a free for all where they just try to kill each other and end it all sooner.
Gavin Kirkland: :mjlol:! I’m just glad that I’ve been able to see Cleopatra back on my screen again, because there’s truly nothing better :blessed:!!!!
(Amber enters the ring and all the women stand around the ring, staring each other down and anticipating someone making the first move. Just then, the bell rings!)
(DING! DING! DING!)
Stew-O: That’s the bell and Madison Kaline takes off right at Astraea Jordan! Madison looks to get the jump on things as she goes after one of her most noted enemies, and that sparks off a reaction among the rest of the competitors in the match!
Gavin Kirkland: There are women everywhere in that ring and they’re all fighting to see which one of them gets to spend the night with me :blessed:!!!
Persephone: That sounds more like a terrifying night in darkest pits of Hell :mjlol:!
Gavin Kirkland: Don’t act like you don’t want this :mjlit:!!!
Persephone: 🤢!!!!!!! But just about all of these bitches bore the fuck out of me, so hopefully one of them kills somebody or something in the next couple of seconds just to make this interesting. You know, spice things up a little to give me something to talk about. Sienna and Amber are on another side of the ring throwing punches at each other, while Sheridan and Kassidy do the same – and sadly no one’s been taken out of here on a stretcher yet. 🙄
Stew-O: The match… just started. 😐 Anyway, Astraea and Madison have a vicious history with each other, so I’m not surprised to see the two of them tangled up with each other here in the early going! Madison has Astraea backed into a corner where she hammers away at Astraea, striking her over the top of the head and trying to beat her down! Astraea though, she manages to duck around her and drives her into the turnbuckles, returning the fire that she’d gotten from Madison!
Gavin Kirkland: Astraea Jordan came back to EAW as a feisty MILF, getting Ximena Velasquez to say “I Quit” in what was Astraea’s return match – but I’d just like to put it out there for her that I don’t need a safeword. 😈
Stew-O: She’s not interested.
Gavin Kirkland: :mjpls: It wasn’t a question! She’s really taking it to Madison though and- AMBER KEYS COMES STRIKING ASTRAEA OVER THE BACK! AMBER POPPED SIENNA OVER THE ROPES TO THE OUTSIDE AND WENT TO GO HELP OUT MADISON!
Stew-O: This isn’t surprising to see either, as one alliance or another was bound to come into play at some point! Amber grabs Astraea by her braid and yanks her by it to the mat, where she starts stomping down on Astraea and Madison doesn’t hesitate to join in with her Queen’s Court ally!
Persephone: Sheridan sees Astraea losing to the numbers game, but taking her eyes off of Kassidy ends up being a mistake as Kassidy capitalizes with a short-arm clothesline to bring her down. Even I would’ve known not to do that. 🙄 Kassidy begins to kick Sheridan toward the ropes and eventually out of the ring, but Sheridan comes down on her feet and she’s able to reach inside, grabbing Kassidy’s legs to pull her out with her and they’re instantly back to throwing hands the second Kassidy’s out at ringside. These whores are tough or whatever so I know they’re not about to quit even though they totally should!
Stew-O: Kassidy and Sheridan go back and forth with heavy hands connecting as they trade strikes on the outside, trying to force the other into backing down but I don’t think they’re going to get what they want this early! Sheridan swings at Kassidy- KASSIDY DRIVES HER INTO THE BARRICADE! SHERIDAN’S BACK IS RAMMED INTO THE BARRICADE AND KASSIDY GOES RIGHT INTO RAPIDFIRE PUNCHES TO KEEP THE UPPER HAND HERE!
Gavin Kirkland: I can’t tell if that’s a determined or demented look in her eyes, but Kassidy isn’t holding back on Sheridan as she tries to take advantage of the situation! I’ve decided on demented though after a moment of thinking it over; she’s petty enough to try to force me into watching her win just to get back at me for the shit I’ve had to say about her, like when I said I wanted her dead and gone!
Persephone: Something tells me you aren’t even a factor at all. But whatever this bitch is motivated by, Sheridan is definitely suffering for it because Kassidy is beating the shit out of her right now. Kassidy throws a knee up into Sheridan’s stomach and then grabs her in a headlock to try to direct her back toward the ring but Sheridan fights her way out with punches to the back, slipping her way out and lifting Kassidy up into a back suplex to drop her into the edge of the apron! Fingers crossed for a broken back so that this ends sooner with one less woman involved! 🤞
Stew-O: Kassidy writhes on the ground after that unexpected drop and Sheridan turns, WALKING RIGHT INTO A CHAIR SHOT OVER THE HEAD! SIENNA JADE STRIKES SHERIDAN WITH A CHAIR AND SHERIDAN GOES DOWN IN A HEAP ON THE GROUND! WHERE THE HELL DID SHE EVEN COME FROM?!
Persephone: :mjlol:!!!! Does it matter?! I’m all for anything that brings these bitches down, honestly! Sienna drives the top of the chair down onto Sheridan repeatedly and she looks absolutely ruthless right now after taking her out, so I can’t be mad at her doing something useful here in this match! But if she could just end it all right now though, that’d be even better. 🙏
Gavin Kirkland: You might be getting your wish from Amber and Madison, as after getting Astraea Jordan out of the ring on another side of it, the two of them have gotten a ladder out from under the ring! They slide it into the ring and they go to roll in after- SIENNA PULLS AMBER BACK OUT THE RING BEFORE SHE CAN GET TO HER FEET AND LETS HER FALL UNCERIMONIOUSLY TO THE FLOOR! AMBER HITS WITH A THUD AFTER SIENNA RUNS AROUND THE RING TO GRAB HER, AND SIENNA STARTS STOMPING DOWN ON AMBER!
Stew-O: Inside the ring though is Madison with the ladder and she tries to go setting it up, but rolling in just in time is Sienna with the chair still after doing away with Amber! Madison doesn’t hesitate going after the woman who dethroned her for the Unified Women’s World Championship years ago, pulling the legs right out from under Sienna as she raised the chair and now she is all over Sienna with punches to the face now that she has got her down!
Persephone: Madison looks like she might actually be out for blood too, so it actually might not be all bad! She gets Sienna one last time in the face before coming off of her with a handful of hair and dragging her over to the ladder, WHERE SHE SLAMS SIENNA’S FACE INTO THE LADDER THAT IS ON THE MAT! HA! I LOVE IT! JUST START MAIMING THESE BITCHES :drakelike:!!!
Gavin Kirkland: NOT THE FACE :noah:!!!!
Persephone: AND NOW A SECOND TIME! Madison does it again and Sienna tries to turn away despite Madison’s hold on the hair, and Madison opens the ladder with one hand while she forces a struggling Sienna’s head between the two sides of the ladder-
Stew-O: KASSIDY HEART WITH A KENDO STICK TO MADISON’S BACK! KASSIDY CRACKS MADISON WITH A KENDO STICK AFTER COMING INTO THE RING FROM BEHIND AND NOW SHE GETS HER AGAIN, MADISON LETTING GO OF SIENNA THIS TIME! MADISON TURNS AROUND TO TRY TO GET A VIEW AT WHAT’S COMING HER WAY, BUT KASSIDY STRIKES HER DOWN WITH A SHOT OF THE KENDO STICK TO THE FACE!!!
Gavin Kirkland: :yikes:!!! Madison has her hands to her face after going down, but is that going to stop Kassidy? Of course not! She continues to light Madison up with the kendo stick while Sienna brings herself up, finding her nose bloody after coming into contact with the ladder – and she looks pissed off! Sienna gets in stomps as she shouts something at Madison, then demanding the kendo stick from Kassidy and getting it to raise up-
Persephone: WHY WON’T THIS OLD BITCH STAY DOWN?! AMBER SHOVES SIENNA FROM BEHIND AND SHE GOES TRIPPING OVER MADISON, FALLING RIGHT INTO KASSIDY! Kassidy is up first after Sienna gets off her and Amber connects with a knee strike to the face that snaps Kassidy’s head to the side before she goes snatching Kassidy up off the mat only for Kassidy to start throwing punches to the gut! Kassidy manages to break free but Amber hardly looks caught off guard as she goes punching right back!
Gavin Kirkland: Madison and Sienna are right there with them as they’re up on their feet, and fighting side by side must be an instinct for these four as that’s exactly what they’re doing! But the only thing missing from all this is my beloved queen, Cleopatra :mjcry:!!!
Stew-O: It’s very much supposed to be every woman for herself here in this Ladder Match, but you wouldn’t know it at first glance with how the Jaded Hearts are going back and forth with two-thirds of Queen’s Court! Sienna trying to fight off Madison, Amber going at Kassidy but things look to be just about even-
Gavin Kirkland: THE FOUR OF THEM ARE HIT FROM OPPOSITE SIDES AS THEY’RE SMASHED BETWEEN LADDERS FROM ASTRAEA AND SHERIDAN! KASSIDY, SIENNA, AMBER, AND MADISON ARE STUNNED FROM THE HIT AND THEY’RE RAMMED AGAIN BEFORE ASTRAEA TURNS WITH THE LADDER, CATCHING SIENNA IN THE FACE WITH THE END OF THE LADDER AND THAT TAKES HER OUT!
Stew-O: Madison nearly gets taken out but she ducks down and around Astraea to try to get her from behind! But Astraea hits a back kick and drops the ladder, GRABBING MADISON OFF OF HER FEET AND THROWING HER DOWN FOR A SCOOP SLAM ONTO THE LADDER! MADISON ROLLS OFF OF THE LADDER IN PAIN BUT THE DAMAGE HAS UNDOUBTEDLY BEEN DONE! AND ALL OF THIS HAPPENING AS SHERIDAN LOOKS TO FEND OFF AMBER AND KASSIDY, WHO HAVE SOMEHOW MANAGED TO STAY ON THEIR FEET!
Persephone: Astraea goes for Kassidy and that pulls the both of them away from the action going on between Sheridan and Amber, who forces Sheridan to drop the ladder after a missed hit attempt by raking her eyes! She can’t win if she can’t see, oh well! 🤷♀️ Amber swiftly takes advantage by pummeling Sheridan with forearms and uppercuts, knocking her back into the ropes where she connects with a step-up knee strike that catches Sheridan right on the jaw to bring Sheridan to kneel!
Stew-O: BUT JUST AS AMBER LINED UP FOR HER NEXT MOVE, SHERIDAN POPPED UP AND CAUGHT HER WITH A GUT PUNCH! AMBER IS STOPPED IN HER TRACKS AND SHERIDAN EASILY LIFTS HER UP OVER HER SHOULDER! Amber flails trying to break free from Sheridan’s grasp but Sheridan is able to hold her, AND GETS A RUNNING START FOR A POWERSLAM ON THE GROUNDED LADDER!!! AMBER KEYS GETS DRIVEN DOWN ONTO THE LADDER WITH NASTY FORCE BUT THE EXPRESSION ON SHERIDAN’S FACE IS THAT OF A WOMAN WHO SIMPLY DOES NOT CARE!
Gavin Kirkland: She sure doesn’t! She kicks Amber out of the ring and grabs the ladder from the mat, moving to set it up in the middle of the ring! Sheridan looking up to make sure that she’s positioned it properly and she goes to climb up! She’s headed up uncontested and she’s got the contract in her sights!
Stew-O: Sheridan is closing in on the contract that’s hanging above the ring, but this gets the attention of Kassidy as she and Astraea are still in the ring! The former Answers World Champion rocks Astraea with a forearm to try to get out of the corner but Astraea remains on her feet, now trying to get back at Kassidy with a hit of her own but Kassidy doesn’t back down either! Kassidy goes at her with multiple strikes before she’s struck back with a kick to the gut, sent reeling into the ropes and Astraea charges to knock her out- BUT KASSIDY LIFTS HER UP AND OVER THE TOP ROPE TO THE OUTSIDE!
Persephone: Kassidy shoots right over to the ladder and grabs hold of Sheridan’s ankle before she can get much further, trying to prolong the match for some apparent reason. 🙄 Sheridan holds onto the ladder while trying to reach up for the contract but it’s still out of reach, thanks to Kassidy, of course, otherwise this would all be over! Sheridan tries to shake her off but Kassidy’s still holding on!
Stew-O: NOT FOR LONG AS KASSIDY TAKES A STOMP TO THE FACE! KASSIDY’S FORCED TO LET GO AS SHERIDAN DRIVES HER BOOT RIGHT DOWN ONTO KASSIDY’S FACE! Sheridan starts going up higher now as she senses that this could be her moment, a shot at headlinging Pain for Pride for the Universal Women’s Championship! Kassidy isn’t letting her get away so easily though as she starts climbing up just under her?! Kassidy following after Sheridan with a laser-like focus!
Gavin Kirkland: She clubs Sheridan over the back before Sheridan can reach out for the contract again as she’s caught up with her, and Sheridan finds herself in a precarious positon now! Kassidy is insisting on getting up as high as Sheridan here and Sheridan tries to elbow her down, throwing attempted hit after attempted hit but it’s just having no effect on that bitch! Kassidy is hitting her in return from a somewhat better vantage point, easier to hit Sheridan over the back and her head that took that nasty chair shot earlier! And Kassidy mdanages to get her arm around Sheridan’s neck!
Stew-O: “STARGAZING” OFF THE LADDER!!! SHERIDAN GETS THE BACK OF HER HEAD DRIVEN INTO THE MAT AS THE TWO-TIME WORLD CHAMPION TAKES HER DOWN WITH AN INVERTED DDT RIGHT OFF THE LADDER!!! WHAT A SIGHT! WHAT IMPACT! HOW DOES SHERIDAN COME BACK FROM THAT?!
Persephone: Who cares if she does or doesn’t?! Because I don’t! What I know is that Kassidy has a clear path to that contract and I’m need her or someone to take it; I’m ready to go! Kassidy looks to answer my prayers as she gets up and goes for the ladder, eyes on the prize while she starts to climb up and this one is about to be over :blessed:!!!!
Stew-O: BUT MAYBE NOT! COMING UP THE OTHER SIDE OF THE LADDER IS ASTRAEA! She’s back in the match after that fall and rolling into the ring now, hurrying over to try to meet Kassidy up top! To say that these two have a heated past is an understatement and just as it looked like Kassidy could get her hands on that contract as her fingertips brush the bottom of it, she sees Astraea coming up – and the expressions on their faces as they eye each other say enough! WORDS AREN’T NEEDED AS ASTRAEA THROWS THE FIRST PUNCH! KASSIDY TRYING KNOCK HER OFF WITH ONE OF HER OWN! ASTRAEA AGAIN! NOW KASSIDY! KASSIDY CATCHING ASTRAEA AGAIN, JUST FOR ASTRAEA THROW A HUGE RIGHT!
Gavin Kirkland: ASTRAEA GETS HER FACE SLAMMED OFF THE TOP OF THE LADDER! FUCK! KASSIDY REACHES UP FOR THE CONTRACT- ASTRAEA GETS THE WIDE OPEN SHOT TO KASSIDY’S FACE AFTER KASSIDY TOOK HER EYES OFF HER! THEY’RE BACK TO TRADING SHOTS-
Persephone: Madison Kaline starts pushing on the ladder! Astraea and Kassidy stop what they’re doing once they sense that the ladder isn’t staying still- :mjlol:!!!!!!!!! MADISON TOPPLES THE LADDER AND KASSIDY GOES PLUMMETING OFF OF IT RIGHT INTO THE TOP ROPE! KASSIDY HEART’S HEAD GOES SNAPPING BACK AS HER NECK HITS OFF OF THE ROPE AND IT LOOKS LIKE SHE’S OUT AFTER THAT! ALL OF THAT FOR NOTHING!
Stew-O: Madison wasn’t going to sit back and let someone else take what could be her second chance at the Universal Women’s Championship! But Astraea landed on her feet as she dropped down in time, finding herself immediately in a brawl with Madison as Madison didn’t wait to give her even a second to try to get her footing! Astraea fends for herself the best that she can, able to get in some shots against Madison- BUT A DROPKICK FROM MADISON KNOCKS HER DOWN NEAR THE ROPES, AND MADSION AND ASTRAEA GO SPILLING OUT THE RING AS MADISON TACKLES HER THROUGH THE ROPES!!
Persephone: A really ugly fall for them to take, but also really fitting! It’s a mess of bodies at ringside as Kassidy and Sheridan have yet to properly recover from their own disastrous drops – not that I’m rushing them at all, just stay down for the rest of the match TBH 🤷♀️- and Astraea and Madison are having to try to recover quick enough. Just ahead of everyone else are Sienna and Amber slugging it out, Amber starting to force Sienna back around the corner of the ring in the direction of the other women.
Gavin Kirkland: Amber gets Sienna with a wild shot and she pulls her into a side headlock so that she can direct punches at her face, as if she hasn’t already been through enough with having been busted open! She has Sienna held close to try to prevent her from escaping but Sienna tries to hit Amber off nonetheless, LIFTING AMBER OFF OF HER FEET FOR A SIDE SUPLEX ON THE RINGSIDE FLOOR!!! SIENNA FREES HERSELF UP BY DROPPING AMBER AND SHE COMES DOWN RIGHT ON THE BACK OF HER HEAD!!!
Stew-O: Sienna turns over and gets a hold of Amber right away knowing that Amber won’t be down for long, beating her over the back and dropping elbows across the neck! The two of them brawl alongside the reignited Madison and Astraea fight as they’re back on their feet, Amber trying to bring herself up to stand as Sienna has her on her knees while standing over her! Astraea drives Madison into the apron and starts to gain the upper hand as Madison collides with the hardest part of the ring, and Amber’s hitting at the ribs of the last Freeweight Champion in an effort to fight her off!
Persephone: You would think this German Efficiency bitch would’ve taken the hint and not gotten back into this shit, but here she goes getting in the mix as she big boots Sienna! Sienna gets knocked right past our commentary table and Sheridan grabs Amber off the ground, SLAMMING HER FACE RIGHT INTO THE TOP OF OUR COMMENTARY TABLE :krabs:!!! FOR WHAT?! FOR WHAT?! CAN’T SHE SEE THAT WE’RE WORKING HERE?!!
Stew-O: SHERIDAN DOES IT AGAIN AND AGAIN, HAVING AMBER KEYS LOOKING DAZED AS SHE TRIES TO KEEP HERSELF STANDING! SHERIDAN WITH TWO HANDFULS OF HAIR- GETS AN ELBOW TO THE RIBS AS AMBER FIGHTS BACK! Amber manages to buy a moment with a forearm to the face and- SIENNA JUMPS OFF OUR TABLE AFTER CLIMBING PAST US AND HITS SHERIDAN BACK INTO THE APRON AFTER AMBER MOVES OUT THE WAY!
Gavin Kirkland: That sneaky minx! Amber goes after Sienna while she’s got the chance, shoving her into Sheridan and attacking the both of them as she keeps them within range of each other! At least that way, she’s got eyes on the both of them! Amber’s dishing out all kinds of attacks as she tries to capitalize on the damage done to these two, while the likes of Astraea and Madison don’t see Kassidy coming after them until it’s too late! Kassidy inserts herself right into their unfolding drama here, taking them both down with an unexpected double clothesline! NO! MADISON DUCKS AND SHE STRIKES KASSIDY OVER THE BACK OF THE HEAD! KASSIDY MIGHT’VE SEVERELY UNDERESTIMATED THAT FALL AS SHE’S DUCKED DOWN WITH HANDS OVER HER HEAD!
Stew-O: THAT’S NO STOPPING MADISON THOUGH AS SHE UNLEASHES A NUMBER OF CLOBBERING HITS TO TRY TO HAVE KASSIDY FURTHER DEBILITATED! Madison seeking to do some damage as she brings Kassidy over to the steps in a hold for a suplex, but Kassidy blocks it and stays on her feet, now throwing knee strikes up at Madison’s gut! Kassidy breaks free and counters the hold as she quickly rotates- DDT ONTO THE STEPS! MADISON GETS HER HEAD SPIKED ON THE STEPS AND SHE’S DOWN COVERING HER HEAD!
Persephone: Kassidy gets up looking pretty proud of herself but if Madison’s still moving she clearly can’t waste my time by getting caught up in the moment – finish the fucking match! Uggghhhhh, and she didn’t even anticipate that Astraea bitch coming back at her and tackling her right into the rest of the women and causing them all to go down! It’s a mess out here in front of us as they all try to gather themselves up, Kassidy trying to fight Astraea off as she tries to make the most of the unexpected takedown and Sienna having Sheridan by the hair so that she can repeatedly drive her knee into her face!
Stew-O: Effective at first, but she should’ve gone for the arms as Sheridan blocks one of the oncoming knees and then captures the leg as she tries to force herself up to stand! Sienna trying to fight her off but Sheridan keeps her head down, while Kassidy fights her way up against Astraea- AMBER KEYS SHOOTS THROUGH THE ROPES IN A SUICIDE DIVE TO TAKE ALL FOUR WOMEN DOWN!! AMBER SURPRISING ALL OF THEM AS SHE COMES FROM THE RING, HAVING TAKEN ADVANTAGE OF THE CHAOS THAT HAD LEFT EVERYONE SCRAMBLING TO GET UP!!!
Persephone: Okay but now she has to get back into the ring, and she’s not moving fast enough for me! Amber pulls herself up and this booing crowd clearly didn’t appreciate her bringing all that action to a halt, but she’s really doing me such a favor; I really can’t thank her enough! Amber rolls into the ring and grabs one of the fallen ladders to try to set it up in the ring – finally, someone’s going to end this shit once and for all! 👏👏
Gavin Kirkland: Amber has the ladder up properly and she doesn’t hesitate to start climbing! A former Women’s Champion from centuries ago, I’m sure she’d love to be able to say she came back and main evented for the Universal Women’s Championship!
Persephone: :mjlol:!
Stew-O: Centuries is quite the exaggeration, but yes, Amber certainly does have an agenda and that’d be one way to fulfill it! Amber gets higher on that ladder and she reaches up in a hurry only to find she’s got to get up further, no fear in the eyes of Amber as she’s got her eyes focused on the contract that could be just fingertips away!
Persephone: FUUUUCK! 🙄 Astraea dragged her ass into the ring in time and grabbed Amber’s ankle to keep her from getting anywhere, and now she’s trying to yank her down! We were so close!! 😠 Amber tries to shake her off but Astraea just won’t let go so that this can be over and starts pulling Amber down back down the ladder, getting Amber onto her shoulders- ASTRAEA POWERBOMBS HER ONTO THE OTHER LADDER THAT’S DOWN IN THE RING!! AMBER’S BACK HAS GOT TO BE FUCKED AFTER THAT :mjlol:! BUT NOW ASTRAEA HAS THE CHANCE TO-
Gavin Kirkland: SIENNA WITH THE KENDO STICK TO THE BACK! SHE PICKED IT BACK UP AFTER IT’D BEEN LEFT IN THE RING AND ASTRAEA NEARLY FALLS OVER FROM THE HIT! SIENNA STRIKING AGAIN AND ASTRAEA SHOUTS AS SHE STUMBLES AROUND THE RING! SIENNA REELS BACK TO TAKE ANOTHER SWING- THE KENDO STICK BREAKS AS SHE STRIKES THE LADDER, NOT EXPECTING ASTRAEA TO HAVE DUCKED!! BUT IF SHE SWUNG THAT HARD, JUST IMAGINE IF IT WOULD’VE HIT!
Stew-O: Astraea dodged a crazy blow there for sure! And she knows it as she starts going at Sienna in the moment of surprise with repeated forearms and she looks to take Sienna off her feet- SIENNA STABS HER IN THE SHOULDER WITH THAT JAGGED END OF THE BROKEN KENDO STICK! ASTRAEA DROPS HER AND SIENNA STABS HER AGAIN, LOOKING SAVAGE WITH THAT BLOOD COMING DOWN HER FACE!
Persephone: Astraea tries to get away as she clutches at her shoulder and ends up in the corner where Sienna starts to beat down on her, getting that arm she was just targeting over the top rope and pulling it back in under it toward herself to cause it to bend at an unnatural angle to put pressure on the shoulder. Sienna’s in no hurry but here on the outside, Madison, Kassidy and Sheridan are all fighting each other in front of us! Anyone else would commend Madison for having the wherewithal to get back up, but I just simply won’t when she could’ve stayed dead after that DDT :noah:!!
Stew-O: Madison isn’t going to just give this chance up, much like the rest of the women! Madison launches a kick at Kassidy to send her back but it’s Sheridan that moves quickly to drop Madison with a clothesline just after! She reaches into the ring for one of the two other ladders and drags it out to have it on the apron and the top end on our commentary table, it’s looking like she’s got something planned!
Persephone: Can she go play engineer somewhere else?! There’s a match that needs ending!
Gavin Kirkland: I actually have a sex swing that needs installing if she’s available- I MEAN I WONDER WHAT SHE COULD POSSIBLY HAVE IN MIND HERE! I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT SHE COULD BE UP TO BUT I’M VERY INTERESTED!
Stew-O: I don’t know how I managed to be the one who got booked for this show with you two out of everyone else who could’ve done this in my place. 😐
Persephone: Sheridan goes to grab Madison and drags her up, bouncing her head off the ladder that she’s bridged from the ring to the commentary table, but we just might never know what’s going through her mind as Kassidy attacks the both of them from behind! This Mauler bitch or whoever just doesn’t know when to mind her business! She kicks Sheridan in the ribs while she’s got her down to send her rolling away and then has to turn her attention to Madison as Madison wasn’t about to let this new brunette bitch go unaswerred, but I also wouldn’t have hated her if she had! Take the fucking hint!
Stew-O: While Kassidy and Madison go on trying to beat the absolute hell out of each other, Sienna and Astraea are still in the ring and Astraea has managed to kick Sienna away from her! Sienna still with that broken piece of kendo stick going for Astraea but Astraea just blasts her with a forearm as she comes out the corner! Astraea fighting with an urgency after having her shoulder targeted and she’s going at Sienna with a quickness that Sienna’s struggling to keep up with! WAIT! SIENNA KICKS HER IN THE GUT TO SEND HER STUMBLING BACK AND SIENNA CHARGES-
Gavin Kirkland: “CHIRAQ FLOWSION”!!! ASTRAEA MANAGES TO HOIST SIENNA UP ONTO HER SHOULDER AND HITS A DESPERATION MOVE TO DROP SIENNA! WHAT A COUNTER! BUT NOW SHE’S GOT TO HERSELF UP AND ONTO THAT LADDER, BUT THAT ARM IS OBVIOUSLY BOTHERING HER!
Persephone: And now it’s going to potentially hinder her?! Fucking hate it here! Astraea drags herself off the mat and to her feet to get to the ladder, and she starts to climb! Just let her make it up there and get the contract, I’m fucking begging :mjcry:!!!
Stew-O: Astraea’s journey to the top looks unimpeded as she starts making her way up and taking a few seconds to check her surroundings every now and then! Astraea had missed the opportunity to main event Pain for Pride despite having been deemed as having the capabilities to do so, only for things to not work out back on Empire! But now she’s got the chance right there over her head to put that all to rest and make it official! Astraea reaching up for the contract!
Persephone: FUCK!! KASSIDY COMES UP THE LADDER AND OF COURSE, SHE WASN’T GOING TO LET ASTRAEA JUST TAKE IT LIKE THAT! WHO’S SURPRISED?! SHE THREW MADISON INTO THE STEPS AS SOON AS SHE SAW ASTRAEA GOING UP! Kassidy cracks her in the face with a punch and transitions over into forearms once Astraea stops trying to get the contract, having to focus on Kassidy going at her face like that! Astraea throwing a hit to try to knock her down- KASSIDY CATCHES THE ARM, TURNS WITH IT OVER HER SHOUDLER, AND DROPS DOWN OFF THE LADDER TO SNAP IT OVER THE TOP OF IT! ASTRAEA GETS HER ARM TAKEN DOWN ONTO THE TOP OF THE LADDER, AND SHE GOES RIGHT TO GRABBING AT HER SHOULDER!
Gavin Kirkland: BUT SHE NEEDS TO BE WATCHING KASSIDY, WHO’S COME AROUND ON HER SIDE OF THE LADDER AND PULLS HER LEGS RIGHT OUT FROM UNDER HER TO SEND ASTRAEA PLUMMETING TO THE MAT! ASTRAEA CRASHES ON THE CANVAS AS SHE’S PULLED AWAY FROM THE LADDER AND KASSIDY IS STOMPING ALL OVER HER AS SHE LOOKS TO ENSURE THAT ASTRAEA IS WORN DOWN!
Stew-O: Astraea tries to cover up while she’s down on the mat but Kassidy is just relentless right now! The recently named Hall of Fame inductee grabs Astraea by the waist and hoists her up into a german suplex! But she holds on as she turns over with Astraea still in her grasp and HITS ANOTHER GERMAN SUPLEX! THE STRENGTH BY KASSIDY IS INSANE AS SHE TURNS THEM OVER AGAIN AND LOOKS TO GET ASTRAEA UP A THIRD TIME-
Persephone: SHERIDAN HITS KASSIDY WITH THAT CHAIR TO THE BACK! KASSIDY DROPS ASTRAEA AND SHERIDAN HITS KASSIDY AGAIN, SLAMMING THAT STEEL CHAIR AGAINST HER AND KASSIDY GOES DOWN! SHERIDAN UNLOADS ON KASSIDY WITH CHAIR SHOT AFTER CHAIR SHOT!
Gavin Kirkland: Probably not the way she’s used to being unloaded on if you know what I mean :mjlit:!! But Sheridan tosses the chair aside and grabs Kassidy, taking her off the mat and into a butterfly backbreaker! Kassidy grabs at her back as she comes down hard across Sheridan’s knee, but she’s not getting any rest as Sheridan has her by the hair, dragging her to the ladder and slamming her face right into the side rail! Kassidy’s head gets repeatedly bounced off that ladder BEFORE SHE GETS LAUNCHED WITH A TIGER SUPLEX RIGHT ONTO THE STEEL CHAIR THAT SHERIDAN LEFT BEHIND HER!
Stew-O: A BRILLIANT MOVE BY SHERIDAN JUST NOW TO DROP KASSIDY LIKE THAT AFTER WHAT SHE JUST PUT HER THROUGH! Sheridan looks absolutely merciless with the quickness she delivered that with! Sheridan grabs a hold of Kassidy and throws her from the ring, and then looks to the ladder! Sheridan seeing another opportunity to go for the contract and she goes climbing up!
Gavin Kirkland: :damn:!!!! MADISON HITS SHERIDAN OVER THE BACK WITH THAT BARBED WIRE BAT! SHERIDAN SCREAMS AS SHE’S HIT AGAIN, THAT BARBED WIRE DIGGING INTO HER BACK AND MADISON IS LETTING HER HAVE IT! I know things between them are personal, but this is something else! MADISON GOES FOR BLOOD AS SHE SEEMS TO TRY TO HIT HARD ENOUGH TO TEAR THROUGH THE BODY SUIT WITH THE BAT WITH EVERY HIT AND SHERIDAN HAS NO CHOICE BUT TO COME DOWN!
Persephone: Madison drives the top of the bat right into Sheridan’s stomach and then brings it down over her back again! This psycho bitch isn’t playing games! Sheridan is forced down to the mat after that and rising from the dead is Amber Keys, telling Madison to grab Sheridan and throw her out the ring!
Stew-O: The Hall of Famer kicks Sheridan to the outside and Amber grabs her from the ground, Sheridan trying to fight her off as she knows that she’s in a vulnerable position with no help! But it’s to no avail as Amber starts beating her over the back and throwing knees to the face; it’s not looking good for Sheridan right now! Madison comes from out the ring and digs under the apron, retrieving a table that she turns over to try to start preparing to set up!
Persephone: But as she does, Sheridan starts getting more combative with Amber! Amber struggling to keep her held in place and- MADISON WITH ANOTHER HIT OF THE BAT OVER SHERIDAN’S BACK! SHERIDAN NEARLY DROPS TO HER KNEES BUT AMBER KEEPS HER HELD UP, AND MADISON STRIKES AGAIN!
Stew-O: Madison drops her back and quickly goes back to the table, setting it up and getting it in place! She goes back under the ring once again, coming out with lighter fluid and a pack of matches :lupe:!!!! She douses the top of the table in lighter fluid and it’s just a few seconds after that the table is going up in flames! Madison and Amber drag Sheridan over to the table, and this is a sight familiar to days of Empire when The Queen’s Court were all on top-
Gavin Kirkland: ASTRAEA COMES OFF THE APRON WITH A DIVING CROSSBODY! SHE FLIES OVER SHERIDAN AND TAKES DOWN MADISON AND AMBER, ALL OF THEM HITTING THE FLOOR!!!! Astraea comes rolling off of them, hyping herself and the crowd up as she gets to her feet and she makes her way over to Sheridan for a moment as she directs her toward Amber and Madison. Astraea starts ahead as she goes right for Madison, getting her up just to start pummeling her over the top of her head! Sheridan staggering over but getting a hold of Amber and she starts beating on her as well! The Queen’s Court looks to be in some trouble as Astraea kicks Madison to the ground, leaving Amber to get a taste of the numbers game as Astraea and Sheridan team up on her!
Persephone: Put her through the table and be done with it! It’d be one of the few good things coming out of this for me right now; I’m not asking for much here!
Stew-O: Astraea points to the table while Sheridan has Amber in a front headlock, and it’s looking like it’s the end for Amber as Sheridan starts forcing her toward the table-
Gavin Kirkland: WHAT THE FUCK?!
Persephone: HUH?!?!?!
Stew-O: ASTRAEA GETS TAKEN WITH A DISCUS CLOTHESLINE BY SHERIDAN?!
Persephone: SHERIDAN SHOVED AMBER AWAY AND JUST SPUN AROUND ON ASTRAEA TO TAKE HER DOWN! IS SHE INSANE?! SHE WAS HELPING HER! WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?!
Stew-O: Amber’s down on the ground watching on in confusion along with Madison, as Sheridan grabs Astraea and throws her into the front of our commentary table with unprecedented force! Astraea struggles to get herself up but Sheridan comes over with a stomp down onto her back and forcing her down to the ground, reaching down for Astraea’s braid to pull her up, just to slam her face down against the ground!
Gavin Kirkland: Amber and Madison get themselves up as Sheridan drags Astraea to her feet, dragging her face to the other end of the top of the commentary table, and Madison takes the opportunity to hit Astraea in the midsection with her bat! Madison hits her again, and Sheridan calls on them to step out the way, THROWING ASTRAEA INTO THE SIDE OF THE NEARBY STEPS AND ASTRAEA JORDAN HITS WITH A LOUD BANG!! THIS IS JUST ENTIRELY UNEXPECTED!!
Stew-O: Astraea probably has no idea what the hell is even going right now for this to even be happening! Sheridan looks remorseless as she stares down Astraea, and backs away to leave Amber and Madison to swarm Astraea! Madison and Amber roughly drag her over to the flaming table and lift her up in unison- THE QUEEN’S COURT PUT ASTRAEA JORDAN THROUGH THE FLAMING TABLE HERE AT RINGSIDE! SHERIDAN GAVE THEM THE OPENING AND THEY DIDN’T HESITATE AT ALL IN THE SLIGHTEST TO TAKE IT!!!
(Astraea is motionless in the wreckage of the table, laid out and the flames have to be extinguished by ringside assistance once Madison and Amber are clear of the scene.)
Persephone: That’s Dynasty’s problem as far as I’m concerned when it comes to Astraea and whatever the fuck just happened with Sheridan, so I don’t care! Sheridan rolls into the ring as she spots Sienna trying to make her way in and they meet in the middle, more than ready to throw shots at each other but clearly not as ready to end this! Sienna takes a number of fists to the face but a quick knee strike from her to Sheridan is able to stall Sheridan for the moment, and Sienna snatches her up in a side headlock to hold her ground!
Stew-O: Sheridan pushes them over to the ropes, however, and Sienna tries to tighten her hold while using her other hand to punch Sheridan in the face! It looks like she has Sheridan stopped- SHERIDAN LIFTS SIENNA UP OVER THE TOP ROPE BUT SIENNA HOLDS HER ON THE WAY OVER AND DOWN FOR A MODIFIED HOTSHOT! SIENNA LANDS A ROUNDHOUSE KICK FROM THE APRON TO KNOCK SHERIDAN DOWN, AND HEADS FOR THE CORNER! SIENNA GOING TO THE TOP TURNBUCKLE AS SHERIDAN IS DOWN!
Gavin Kirkland: “STARSTRUCK”- NO! IT DOESN’T CONNECT AS SHERIDAN ROLLS OUT OF THE WAY! SIENNA LANDING ON HER FEET AND LOOKING FOR THE “WITCHES HAMMER” AS SHERIDAN HURRIES TO HER FEET! SHERIDAN GETS ROCKED BACK INTO THE TURNBUCKLES AND SIENNA DOESN’T THINK TWICE ABOUT GOING CHARGING IN, BUT SHERIDAN GETS HER WITH A BACK ELBOW! Sheridan now climbing up the turnbuckles with Sienna in front of her, but Sienna goes after her to climb up also!
Stew-O: Sheridan and Sienna fight for control of the situation but neither one of them is backing down, Sienna going all the way up top now! BUT SHERIDAN SWEEPS THE LEGS AND SIENNA FALLS INTO HER, TAKING SHERIDAN WITH HER AS SHE FALLS OVER TO THE OUTSIDE AND THEY HIT THE RINGSIDE FLOOR WITH A NASTY THUD!
Persephone: :mjlol:!!!!!! Serves these whores right for dragging this match out! How fucking hard is it to climb up a fucking ladder?!
Stew-O: Just around the corner of the ring on the outside, Amber and Madison have turned their attention to Kassidy, the two of them ganging up on her! After taking out Astraea, it’s clear that they know going about it like this could only benefit them in the long run and it’s a sound strategy whether anyone likes it or not. Amber holds Kassidy up after dragging her to her feet by her hair, and Madison SWINGS AT KASSIDY WITH THAT BARBED WIRE BAT! AMBER HOLDS HER IN PLACE THOUGH TO KEEP HER STANDING, AND MADISON HITS HER AGAIN BEFORE SWINGING IT AND CATCHING HER IN THE FACE!
Persephone: She gets new hair and a fucked up face now to go with it! Kassidy is down on the ground and Madison swings the bat down into her back, standing on it now just to have the barbed wire dig into Kassidy’s back! Ever since this bat got introduced to the match, these bitches have been getting fucked up but I’m all for it!
Stew-O: Someone’s going to have to get that bat away from Madison if they don’t want to get their chances severely reduced! We’ve seen before just how dangerous she is with it! Madison pulls the bat off of Kassidy and you can see on her back where she’s been cut open, and Madison looking smug as she stands over Kassidy-
Gavin Kirkland: AND AMBER PULLS MADISON INTO A SHORT-ARM LARIAT! AMBER KEYS JUST TOOK DOWN HER QUEEN’S COURT ALLY!! AND NOW SHE’S STOMPING ALL OVER MADISON WITHOUT A SINGLE SIGN OF REGRET!
Persephone: AMBER GRABS THE BAT AND STARTS BRINGING IT DOWN ON MADISON, HITTING HER ANYWHERE SHE CAN AS MADISON ROLLS ON THE GROUND! SHE’S TRYING TO EVADE THOSE STRIKES BUT SHE’S WELL WITHIN AMBER’S SIGHTS, AND THERE’S NO DODGING THIS ATTACK! AMBER ISN’T HOLDING BACK AS MADISON SHOUTS FROM THE GROUND AT HER FEET!
Stew-O: Amber grabs Madison and rolls her into the ring, sending her into the corner where she she starts clobbering Madison with ruthless strikes, and Madison’s unable to cover up! She’s probably more confused than anything right now, struggling with understanding what’s going on; this couldn’t be how she imagined this going between the two of them!
Gavin Kirkland: Well, it is now, and Amber doesn’t care at all! Amber throws her out of the corner by her hair, sending her into the only ladder standing and knocking it over! Madison tries to pick herself up, BUT AMBER HITS THE “SUICIAKICK” TO THE BACK OF THE HEAD! A SUPERKICK TAKES MADISON RIGHT BACK DOWN AND AMBER IS ALL OVER MADISON RIGHT NOW!
Stew-O: It’s not the first time Amber’s done something controversial at one of these Battle of Egypt events! She stands in the middle of the ring looking around at the crowd before she sets her sights back on Madison, picking her up and whipping her into the corner where Madison looks to barely be able to keep herself standing! Amber charging in- A KICK TO THE FACE FROM MADISON! AMBER IS STUNNED AS SHE STRUGGLES TO KEEP A VERTICAL BASE AND MADISON LEAPS OUT THE CORNER WITH A CLOTHESLINE TO BUY HERSELF SOME TIME!
Persephone: This is so infuriating! Just get the ladder and climb up it! Can that old bitch really stop her?! Madison gets up and grabs Amber, only to be met with punches to the gut! Amber fighting her off before grabbing hold of her and lifting her up for a suplex- BUT MADISON COUNTERS INTO A DDT ON THE WAY DOWN AND AMBER GETS DROPPED ON HER HEAD! AMBER TRIES TO QUICKLY GET HERSELF UP BUT MADISON IS THERE TO MEET HER, THE TWO OF THEM TRADING FOREARMS IN THE MIDDLE OF THE RING AS MADISON REFUSES TO GET HER ASS BEAT BY THIS OLD ASS BITCH!
Gavin Kirkland: What you call old, I call experienced :mjlit:!! Amber fires right back at Madison to try to get the upper hand back after Madison unexpectedly countered her, and now she’s trying to wear Madison down! Amber going for a kick- BUT MADISON CATCHES THE LEG AND THROWS IT BACK DOWN THE OPPOSITE WAY, THE MOMENTUM SENDING AMBER RIGHT TO THE MAT! AMBER GETTING UP TO HER KNEES-
Stew-O: AMBER GETS SENT FACE FIRST INTO THE FOOT OF THE OVERTURNED LADDER! FUCK! SHE WRITHES ON THE MAT WITH A HAND OVER HER EYE AND MADISON LOOKS PISSED OFF AS SHE STANDS OVER HER! Amber with a hand over her eye after presumably getting the bottom of the ladder in her eye, but Madison is just as remorseless! Madison getting her taking her over to the corner where she sets Amber up on top and Madison climbs after her. It’s looking she’s got bad intentions for Amber after Amber turned her back on her moments ago!
Persephone: And I hope one of these bitches has intentions of ending this match, goddamn! Madison gets to the top and nearly ends up like Sienna as Amber tries to push her over, but Madison holds onto the top rope and picks herself up as Amber tries to reposition herself on the other side of the turnbuckles. Her eye looks absolutely fucked right now so I don’t know how she plans on doing anything :yikes:!
Gavin Kirkland: Madison climbs up from her side just to get a punch to the face, but she throws one back and Amber rakes the eyes when she gets the opening! Amber pulling Madison over the top turnbuckle with intentions of a suplex to send Madison through that ladder that’s still bridged across to the commentary table! Amber gets Madison into position AND SHE GOES TO HOIST HER UP-
Stew-O: MADISON STARTS FIGHTING BACK, SURELY SEEING WHAT PREDICAMENT SHE’S IN! MADISON PUNCHING AT AMBER’S SIDE AND AMBER STRUGGLES TO PULL HER THE REST OF THE WAY OVER- MADISON FREES HERSELF AND ROCKS AMBER WITH A PUNCH TO SEND HER FALLING BACKWARD! AND AMBER CRASHES THROUGH THE LADDER BRIDGE!!!!
Persephone: ANOTHER BITCH DOWN :blessed:!!!!! AMBER MIGHT AS WELL BE DEAD FROM THE LOOKS OF THINGS, BECAUSE SHE FELL RIGHT THROUGH THAT LADDER AND NOW SHE’S LAID OUT ON THE FLOOR! I DESERVE THIS!!! 😭😭
(Madison remains standing on turnbuckles, looking down on Amber from her position and scowls at the fallen Hall of Famer who hasn’t moved.)
Stew-O: From behind comes Kassidy Heart! She strikes Madison over the back and shoves her over into the ring, where Madison hits with a crash! Kassidy stepping through the ropes and going after Madison with a shining wizard as Madison tried to turn herself over! And just on the outside, Sienna and Sheridan are back at it after getting themselves up, fighting at ringside where Sienna bashes Sheridan’s face against the ring post!
Persephone: Sheridan stumbles away from Sienna but Sienna doesn’t let her get far, hitting at her back that took hits from Madison’s barbed wire bat! Sienna sends her into the ring, and the last four women standing are all inside – and I’m hoping one of them ends up winning this soon!
Gavin Kirkland: Sienna trying to further wear down Sheridan as she gets her in the corner with shoulder thrusts and backs away looking as exhausted as Sheridan, before going in after and charging- SHERIDAN SENDS SIENNA OVER TO THE OUTSIDE! BUT SHE DOESN’T SEE THAT SIENNA STAYED ON HER FEET BY GRABBING THE ROPES! Sheridan goes for one of the two ladders in the ring and picks it up, Kassidy pulling herself away from Madison to go for Sheridan only to get hit with the ladder!
Stew-O: Kassidy goes down and Sheridan starts setting up the ladder, getting Madison’s attention as well but Sienna connects with Madison’s own barbed wire bat on her! Madison falls over and Sienna turns her attention to Sheridan who’s started up the ladder, but Sienna is coming up on the other side! Sheridan nearing the top and Sienna’s moving hastily to catch up to her, Sheridan reaching for the contract only for Sienna to knock her hand away with the bat!
Persephone: Sheridan tries to reach around the bat but Sienna is persistently annoying with that shit right now, knowing that it’s going to keep the match going. 🙄 Sheridan awaits Sienna meeting her on an even level and reaches over to grab Sienna by the hair, BASHING her head into the top of the ladder! Sienna struggles to hold on as she has the bat with her, and tries to jab it at Sheridan but Sheridan catches it under her arm and hits a forearm to the face!
Gavin Kirkland: Sienna loses the bat and Sheridan tries to get a grip on it- SIENNA PULLS HER INTO A HEADLOCK AND IT LOOKS LIKE SHE MIGHT BE GOING FOR A SUPLEX! SIENNA TRYING TO LIFT SHERIDAN BEFORE SHE CAN USE THAT BAT ON HER IN RETURN, AND SIENNA LOOKS READY TO RISK IT ALL RIGHT NOW! SIENNA CLUBBING SHERIDAN OVER THE BACK, BUT SHERIDAN DROPS THE BAT AND STARTS HITTING SIENNA IN RETURN TO TRY TO GET OUT! THE LADDER’S UNSTEADY AS THEY TRY TO GET THE OTHER TO GIVE IN! SHERIDAN SWINGING AS SIENNA TRIES TO GET A STEP HIGHER-
Stew-O: SIENNA AND SHERIDAN FALL OFF THE LADDER AS IT TIPS OVER, AND THE TWO OF THEM GO OVER THE ROPES WHERE THEY LAND ON THE OUTSIDE! SIENNA AND SHERIDAN HIT THE FLOOR WITH A SICK IMPACT, AND THEY BOTH APPEAR TO BE OUT AFTER THE COLLISION!!
Persephone: Kassidy is sat up in a bit of shock after witnessing that! But she knows this is her moment to try to get that Pain for Pride opportunity! Kassidy getting up and grabbing the other nearby ladder and setting it up, but she spots Madison getting up and she goes right after her! She meets Madison with a bicycle knee strike and Madison falls back into the ropes! Kassidy charging at her and Madison hits her with a kick to the face, sending Kassidy stumbling away and Madison goes running with a bulldog!
Stew-O: Kassidy gets taken down face-first into the mat and Madison goes crawling to the ladder, beginning to climb her way up and looking at that contract! Madison getting about halfway up before Kassidy is pulling her down and connecting with a forearm! Kassidy starts repeatedly hitting on her and Madison is trying with everything she’s got to fight back! Kassidy catching her with a knee to the gut that drops Madison to a knee and she takes off into the ropes- COMING BACK INTO A BARBED WIRE BAT TO THE STOMACH!!!!
Gavin Kirkland: KASSIDY DOUBLES OVER AND MADISON HITS HER OVER THE BACK! MADISON HITTING HER AGAIN TO SEND HER TO THE MAT AND THEN DRIVING IT STRAIGHT DOWN INTO KASSIDY’S FACE! KASSIDY TURNS OVER COVERING HER FACE, AND MADISON SETS HER SIGHTS BACK ON THE LADDER! Madison starts climbing again, going for the contract that’s above the ladder! She’s ready for that second opportunity at the Universal Women’s Championship, and she’d be doing it at Pain for Pride!
Persephone: WON’T KASSIDY JUST DIE ALREADY?! FUCK! Kassidy climbs up under Madison on the ladder, trying to catch up to her and Madison opts to try to get higher seeing as how she’s already nearing the top! Madison reaching up with her fingertips brushing the contract! Madison climbing just a little bit higher and she grabs it!!!!
Stew-O: MADISON GETS TAKEN OFF THE LADDER IN AN ELECTRIC CHAIR DROP!!!! KASSIDY TAKING HERSELF AND MADISON OFF THE LADDER, AND THEY DROP TO THE MAT WITH MADISON’S HEAD HITTING OFF THE SECOND LADDER IN THE RING!!!! THE TWO WOMEN GO CRASHING DOWN AND IT’S A TESTAMENT TO WHAT THIS OPPORTUNITY IS GOING TO MEAN FOR THEM!!!
Gavin Kirkland: Madison looks to be knocked out from that fall and Kassidy is slowly turning over herself, dragging herself up to her feet and with the barbed wire bat in hand! Kassidy staring down Madison before taking off at her! “PAINFULLY EVER AFTER” WITH THE BARBED WIRE BAT!!!! KASSIDY DRIVES THE BAT INTO MADISON’S FACE WITH HER FOOT WITH MADISON’S HEAD STILL ON THE LADDER!!! MADISON IS OUT AFTER THAT, AND KASSIDY IS THE ONLY WOMAN STANDING!!!!
Persephone: Kassidy turns to the ladder and starts to climb, looking determined with her eyes on the contract and she makes it to the top where she grabs for the contract! Kassidy looking around at the audience and then the fallen women from the match, none of them moving as she looks back to the contract! AND FUCKING FINALLY!! SOMEONE GETS THE CONTRACT AND UNHOOKS IT! THIS SHIT IS OVER :blessed:!!!!!!!
(DING! DING! DING!)
(“Monster” by Kanye West begins to play and Kassidy stands at the top of the ladder with the Pain for Pride contract raised over her head!)
Bella Braxton: HERE IS YOUR WINNER….. KASSSSSIIIIIIDDDDDDDYYYYY HEEEEEAAAAAAARRRRRRRRTTTTTTTT!!!!!
Persephone: I’m so glad this is over! 😭
Stew-O: And I’m sure Kassidy can say the same, as she’s the one who ends it by getting to the top of the ladder and ultimately securing her spot in a Pain for Pride main event for the Universal Women’s Championship! In another headlining match, Kassidy has the opportunity of closing out the season making more history!
Gavin Kirkland: I know I’ve been critical of her, and she’s damn sure deserving of all I’ve got to say… but I also can admit that she fought for this win. I would’ve preferred Cleopatra, but there’s no denying that Kassidy earned this opportunity.
Persephone: I don’t know how I did it, but I survived this match and I think that’s the real accomplishment here!
Stew-O: It’ll be a bigger accomplishment for Kassidy if she’s able to win her third World Championship at Pain for Pride, taking on Andrea Valentine for the Universal Women’s Championship! With the accomplishments of these two women in mind and what they’re going to be out to achieve, we could be witnessing a historic match at Pain for Pride between the two of them! After everything that we’ve had to witness here, I’m anticipating it being a must-see match – but for now it’s congratulations to Kassidy Heart on securing herself a huge opportunity! With Pain for Pride in her sights, things can only get more interesting from here!
(With Kassidy still on top of the ladder and the contract in her hand, the last sight is Kassidy smirking at the blood she wipes off her face before then looking at the camera, and the scene fades out.)
(Battle of Egypt fades to the next match graphic.)
(The camera returns to ringside, and Bella Braxton is seen with a microphone in her hand.)
Bella Braxton: Ladies and gentlemen… The following contest is scheduled for ONE FALL!!!!
Crowd: ONE FALL!!!!!
(‘Faneto’ by Chief Keef hits, and as the crowd cheers, SOSA Henderson makes his way out to the stage. He has a confident look on his face, but he does not spend too much time on the stage, as he seemingly wants Mr. DEDEDE to hurry up and get to the ring. Before long SOSA Henderson is on his way down to the ramp, where it becomes clear that SOSA is very focused on winning this match and shutting the Chairman up about him.)
Bella Braxton: Introducing first.. From Philadelphia, Pennsylvania… Weighing in at 191 pounds….. SSSSOOOOSSSSAAAAAAAA HHHEEENNNDDEERRRSSOONNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!
Stew-O: SOSA Henderson has a huge match ahead of him, a match that basically came to fruition because of an interview! We all saw what Mr. DEDEDE had to say about SOSA Henderson weeks ago, and now fast forward weeks later, and these two have attacked each other, SOSA cost Mr. DEDEDE the National Elite Championship and ruined his tour bus, and now they’re finally facing off!
Gavin Kirkland: So much has happened that I think the easiest thing to assume is that they’ll tear each other apart! I don’t know who’s going to win. SOSA has been very confident in himself, but that’s how everyone is! This is Mr. DEDEDE he is facing, it won’t be easy.
Persephone: Wow, you actually sound normal.
(As SOSA Henderson waits inside of the ring, ‘Range Brothers’ by Baby Keem & Kendrick Lamar hits. Mr. DEDEDE begins to walk out, and immediately SOSA and the EAW Chairman have their eyes focused on one another. Things were very heated between the two leading up to this match, and there’s no doubt that at this point all either man wants to do right now is get the match started. Mr. DEDEDE immediately begins to make his way down the ramp, not taking any longer than he needs to getting to the ring.)
Bella Braxton: And his opponent…. From Bridgeport, Connecticut… Weighing in at 218 pounds…. MIIIISSTTTERRRRR DEEEEEDEEEEDEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!
Stew-O: Mr. DEDEDE’s tour bus was wrecked one week ago, and honestly with that alone I can say for sure that Mr. DEDEDE isn’t about to give SOSA Henderson an easy time. I can’t say for sure how this one will go, but I can absolutely say that this might just be the most challenging match SOSA has had yet.
Gavin Kirkland: I don’t know if I can name anybody more challenging to face than Mr. DEDEDE, and that remains true no matter who you are! This is going to be a good match though, although I think it’d be even better if Limmy Monaghan was involved in some way.
Persephone: What? Why would- you know what? Nevermind. DEDEDE’s old, SOSA sucks, hopefully this doesn’t last any longer than it needs to.
(Ding! Ding! Ding!)
Stew-O: HERE WE GO! The match between Mr. DEDEDE and SOSA Henderson is on, and this is one that’s been building since Super Voltage! Both men are standing in their opposite corners right now, and we’ve seen many times the great lengths people would go to to try and put Mr. DEDEDE away, even utilizing finishers early on which would the Chairman would kick out of very quickly! I can’t say I know for sure what SOSA Henderson is going to do, especially since he had the chance to see Mr. DEDEDE in action back at Super Voltage very recently, but I can say that this should be a very great-
Gavin Kirkland: SOSA HENDERSON AND MR. DEDEDE JUST RAN AT ONE ANOTHER!!! SOSA JUST WENT FOR A CLOTHESLINE BUT MR. DEDEDE DUCKED UNDER IT! MR. DEDEDE NOW LOOKING FOR A BIG BOOT, BUT SOSA HENDERSON AVOIDS IT BEFORE JUMPING UP AS SOON AS MR. DEDEDE TURNS AROUND!!! STOLE YO B-
Persephone: NO YOU IDIOT, DEDEDE PUSHED SOSA AWAY AND STOPPED IT FROM CONNECTING, AND NOW DEDEDE IS RUNNING IN FOR A SPEAR AS SOSA BOUNCES OFF THE ROPES, FINALLY GONNA END THE MATCH-
Stew-O: NO! SOSA HENDERSON WITH A VERY SMART COUNTER AS HE HOLDS ONTO THE ROPES, STOPPING HIMSELF FROM BOUNCING OFF OF THEM AND INTO THE SPEAR!!! Mr. DEDEDE gets back up far too quickly for SOSA to capitalize, but SOSA has a smirk on his face as both men seem to be back at square one! SOSA seemed very confident all this time that he’d be able to defeat Mr. DEDEDE, and while it’s too early to say whether or not he was right, he did avoid one of Mr. DEDEDE’s biggest moves very early on! Both men now beginning to circle the ring, AND NOW SOSA GOES FOR A DOUBLE LEG TAKEDOWN!
Gavin Kirkland: MR. DEDEDE TURNED TO THE SIDE THOUGH, AND HE WAS ABLE TO KNEE SOSA IN THE MIDSECTION! That was the first real shot anyone was able to land in the match, and it looks like that hit really hard! Mr. DEDEDE didn’t share the same grin SOSA had on his face a few seconds ago, and remembering last Voltage, I could see why!
Persephone: Yeah, SOSA wrecked his dumb tour bus or something.
Gavin Kirkland: That would never happen on Showdown.
Persephone: And that’s why it’s boring.
Stew-O: SOSA Henderson uses the ropes to pull himself up, AND MR. DEDEDE GRABS HIM BEFORE SMASHING SOSA’S FACE INTO THE TOP TURNBUCKLE! SOSA Henderson starts to stumble out of the corner, BUT MR. DEDEDE PUSHES HIM RIGHT BACK INTO IT WITH A BIG BOOT, BEFORE GRABBING SOSA BY THE ARM AND SENDING HIM INTO THE OPPOSITE CORNER! Mr. DEDEDE now charging in, and he delivers a running clothesline to SOSA, who now slowly falls right into the Chairman’s arms as Mr. DEDEDE scoops him up! Mr. DEDEDE now brings SOSA into the center of the ring, AND HE DROPS SOSA TO THE MAT WITH A SCOOP SLAM!
Persephone: A scoop slam? Really? I get he’s like 80 but come on. It’s 2022.
Gavin Kirkland: Uhh, I actually don’t think he’s finished yet!
Persephone: He should be. This match should’ve been over by now, there’s just no way DEDEDE’s fragile bones can still handle this. He’ll fall apart any second, not that it won’t be funny to see.
Gavin Kirkland: WE GET IT, LOOK!!! MR. DEDEDE JUST RAN THE ROPES WHILE SOSA HENDERSON IS STILL LAID OUT ON THE MAT! MR. DEDEDE JUST JUMPED UP AND LOOKED FOR A CORKSCREW ELBOW DROP-
Stew-O: SOSA HENDERSON JUST ROLLED OUT OF THE WAY!!!
Persephone: “We get it”.. Says Gavin Kirkland.
Stew-O: SOSA HENDERSON JUST AVOIDED THE CORKSCREW ELBOW DROP BY MR. DEDEDE! Mr. DEDEDE is quickly getting back up- BUT SOSA IS ABLE TO RUSH BACK UP BEFORE HITTING MR. DEDEDE WITH A DROPKICK TO THE SIDE OF THE HEAD!!! SOSA HENDERSON NOW OUT ONTO THE RING APRON AS MR. DEDEDE GETS BACK UP, AND SOSA HENDERSON DELIVERS A SLINGSHOT HEADSCISSORS TAKEDOWN, TAKING MR. DEDEDE DOWN ONCE AGAIN! He’s not down for long though, as he stumbles up and right into the ropes, bouncing off of them!
Gavin Kirkland: MR. DEDEDE SWINGS AT SOSA AS SOSA RUNS IN, BUT SOSA HENDERSON DUCKS UNDER BEFORE SPRINGBOARDING OFF OF THE MIDDLE ROPE, AND DROPPING MR. DEDEDE WITH A DDT!!!! SOSA HENDERSON JUST HIT MR.
DEDEDE WITH HIS BEST, THAT COMBINATION WAS INCREDIBLE AND NOW SOSA GOES FOR THE FIRST COVER OF THE MATCH!!!!
OOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!
Gavin Kirkland: MR. DEDEDE KICKS OUT, AND THAT WASN’T EVEN A TWO COUNT!
Persephone: Come on, are you kidding me right now? Now is NOT the time for DEDEDE to do DEDEDE things. WHY DID HE KICK OUT AT ONE???
Stew-O: That had to be frustrating. Even though it was the first cover of the match that was still a lot of hard hitting offense in such a short period of time, and it all resulted in only a one count! If SOSA Henderson was upset by that he sure didn’t let it get to him for long, BECAUSE HE’S ALREADY BACK ON THE OFFENSIVE WITH A NASTY KNEE DROP TO THE HEAD! SOSA HENDERSON NOW GRABBING THE CHAIRMAN WHILE HE’S STILL DOWN ON THE MAT, AND HE JUST BEGINS PUNCHING AND ELBOWING AT HIS FACE! IS SOSA TRYING TO DRAW BLOOD PERHAPS??
Gavin Kirkland: I don’t know, but either way Mr. DEDEDE managed to cut him off quickly by pulling SOSA down onto the mat, AND HITTING SOSA WITH HIS OWN ELBOW STRIKE! I feel like that might have taken the fight out of SOSA Henderson! That was a nasty blow to the head, but I don’t really think Mr. DEDEDE is about to be the merciful type! He’s getting back to his feet while holding onto SOSA, and now I think he’s pulling SOSA into a double underhook! IS MR. DEDEDE ABOUT TO GO FOR THE BUTTERFLY EFFECT???
Persephone: SHUT UP! All the yelling is so annoying, no he doesn’t get to hit the move! SOSA managed to free one of his arms and punch DEDEDE in the face. Now he grabbed the old man by arm and sent him onto the ropes.
Stew-O: SOSA Henderson rushes in to try and catch Mr. DEDEDE off guard- BUT MR. DEDEDE CLEARLY SAW IT COMING, BECAUSE HE’S ABLE TO LIFT SOSA OVER HIM OUT ONTO THE RING APRON BEFORE TURNING AROUND AND HITTING SOSA WITH A RIGHT HAND, ALMOST KNOCKING SOSA COMPLETELY OFF OF THE APRON! SOSA JUST BARELY MANAGED TO HANG ON!
Gavin Kirkland: Mr. DEDEDE is grabbing SOSA, AND NOW HE’S TRYING TO LIFT SOSA UP FOR A SUPLEX, BUT SOSA GRABS ONTO THE ROPES AND PULLS HIMSELF DOWN TO HIS FEET, BEFORE TURNING AROUND AND DELIVERING A STUNNER, SENDING MR. DEDEDE’S THROAT INTO THE TOP ROPE! Mr. DEDEDE stumbles back, and now SOSA Henderson is given the opportunity to make it back up to his feet before-
Persephone: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!! THE OLD MAN JUST KNOCKED SOSA OFF OF THE APRON WITH A BOOT!!! DID YOU SEE HOW FAR HE WAS SENT FLYING AFTER THAT!?!?
Stew-O: SOSA getting back up bought Mr. DEDEDE just a few seconds, and that alone allowed him to push SOSA off of the apron and into the barricade with a running big boot! Mr. DEDEDE takes another second as his throat did just hit the top rope a few moments ago, and now he rolls under the bottom rope, not willing to give SOSA a good enough chance to recover! Mr. DEDEDE drags SOSA Henderson back up to his feet after that hard landing to the outside, AND NOW MR. DEDEDE THROWS SOSA BACK FIRST INTO THE RING APRON!! SOSA HENDERSON IS TRYING TO GRAB ONTO THE APRON TO PULL HIMSELF BACK UP, BUT HE’S IN A LOT OF TROUBLE RIGHT NOW!
Gavin Kirkland: Mr. DEDEDE just kicked SOSA in the side of the head as he was pulling himself up, and now he lifts SOSA up onto his shoulders BEFORE DROPPING SOSA FACE FIRST INTO THE BARRICADE!! The referee has reached a three count while these two were “fighting” on the outside, although I don’t really know if I’d call this a fight at all. This has been very one sided thanks to Mr. DEDEDE, and now Mr. DEDEDE is pulling SOSA up one more time, BEFORE SENDING HIM INTO THE STEEL STEPS-
Persephone: :mjlol2: NOPE, SOSA HENDERSON TURNED IT AROUND AND SENT DEDEDE CRASHING INTO THE STEEL STEPS!!!!
Stew-O: THE STEEL STEPS WERE JUST KNOCKED OVER THANKS TO MR. DEDEDE CRASHING INTO THEM, AND NOW SOSA HENDERSON IS CLIMBING UP ONTO THE BARRICADE AS MR. DEDEDE IS SOMEHOW STILL GETTING BACK TO HIS FEET! THE RESILIENCE OF MR. DEDEDE IS INCREDIBLE- BUT AS SOON AS THE CHAIRMAN GETS BACK UP HE’S MET WITH A DIVING FLATLINER BY SOSA!!! SOSA HENDERSON GETS BACK UP BEFORE ROLLING MR. DEDEDE BACK INTO THE RING AND FOLLOWING BEHIND- BUT WAIT A SECOND!
Gavin Kirkland: MR. DEDEDE JUST BURST TO HIS FEET AND RAN INTO THE FAR PAIR OF ROPES, BOUNCING OFF OF THEM-
Persephone: AND SOSA HENDERSON JUST DUCKED DOWN AND ROLLED THE OLD MAN UP!!!
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!
Stew-O: THAT WAS ANOTHER EARLY KICKOUT BUT SOSA HENDERSON DOESN’T MIND THIS TIME, AS HE IMMEDIATELY HITS MR. DEDEDE WITH A BICYCLE KNEE STRIKE!!! I think that roll up was just a means of avoiding what very well could have been a spear with that run up, and now SOSA Henderson is still in control of this match! Mr. DEDEDE is such a huge threat, but SOSA Henderson continues to show that he has what it takes to defeat him!
Gavin Kirkland: Don’t forget that this isn’t just about defeating him for SOSA, he wanted to shut him up! In that one interview Mr. DEDEDE brought up both Heart Break Boy and SOSA Henderson, and after that SOSA appeared on Voltage and started this whole thing! SOSA Henderson really looks like he plans to get payback for everything Mr. DEDEDE said, and for that attack back at Grand Rampage!
Persephone: I’m pretty sure he already got revenge back on Voltage, but whatever. SOSA’s in control, DEDEDE sucks, blah blah blah.
Stew-O: Mr. DEDEDE was already on his way back up to his feet, but SOSA Henderson was able to hit him with an elbow strike before lifting him up and putting him onto the top rope! SOSA Henderson is slowly climbing up and finding his way to Mr. DEDEDE, BUT MR. DEDEDE HITS SOSA WITH A HEADBUTT OUT OF NOWHERE, CAUSING SOSA TO STUMBLE AND DROP DOWN TO THE MIDDLE ROPE! SOSA HENDERSON QUICKLY RECOLLECTS HIMSELF THOUGH, AND HE SWINGS AT THE CHAIRMAN, LANDING A HUGE RIGHT HAND!!
Gavin Kirkland: SOSA Henderson is trying to get Mr. DEDEDE into a front facelock, but Mr. DEDEDE isn’t really making that easy for him! He just hit SOSA with a punch to the midsection, and at this point I think Mr. DEDEDE might have recovered enough to avoid whatever it is SOSA had planned up top! SOSA is continuing to try and get Mr. DEDEDE set up for what might’ve been a superplex, BUT IT’S JUST NOT GONNA HAPPEN! MR. DEDEDE CONTINUES TO LAND MORE PUNCHES, AND NOW HE SHOVES SOSA OFF OF THE TOP ROPE!!!
Persephone: :dahell: Did SOSA just flip onto his feet?
Stew-O: HE SURE DID, AND NOW SOSA HENDERSON RUSHES BACK UP TO THE TOP ROPE BEFORE GRABBING MR. DEDEDE IN A FRONT FACELOCK, AND LIFTING HIM UP!!! BRAINBUSTER ONTO THE TOP TURNBUCKLE!!!! SOSA HENDERSON JUST DROPPED MR. DEDEDE HEAD FIRST ONTO THE TOP TURNBUCKLE, AND NOW MR. DEDEDE CRUMBLES DOWN INTO THE RING!!!! SOSA HENDERSON JUST KNOCKED MR. DEDEDE’S LIGHTS OUT, AND RIGHT NOW I THINK SOSA HENDERSON IS ABOUT TO PICK UP A VICTORY OVER ONE OF THE BIGGEST NAMES IN EAW HISTORY! SOSA HENDERSON DRAGS MR. DEDEDE AWAY FROM THE ROPES BEFORE HOOKING THE LEGS!!!
OOOOOONNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!
TTTTTWWWWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-
Gavin Kirkland: WHAT???? MR. DEDEDE JUST KICKED OUT- THAT WAS BARELY EVEN A TWO COUNT!!! That doesn’t make any sense, how did that only get a two count?? His HEAD was just dropped onto the top turnbuckle, that should’ve knocked him out completely! Even SOSA Henderson doesn’t believe it! I get he’s super resilient and all, but that doesn’t even make any sense! SOSA Henderson should’ve won the match right there, how didn’t he?
Persephone: Because it’s Mr. DEDEDE, and his matches always last an obnoxiously long amount of time because nobody can keep him down for more than a two count.
Stew-O: SOSA Henderson gets back up to his feet, and now the frustration has to be setting in! After all Mr. DEDEDE has said SOSA still hasn’t managed to put him away! SOSA’s backing into the corner, and now… Wait a minute! SOSA IS CALLING FOR MR. DEDEDE TO GET BACK UP, AND I THINK I HAVE A PRETTY GOOD IDEA OF WHAT IT IS SOSA HAS IN MIND RIGHT NOW! IF I’M RIGHT ABOUT THIS MR. DEDEDE MIGHT BE IN BIG TROUBLE, AND THIS MATCH COULD BE COMING TO AN END!
Gavin Kirkland: Mr. DEDEDE is slowly stumbling back up to his feet, and after having his head dropped onto the turnbuckle there’s no way he actually knows where he is! A drop like that is going to mess you up no matter who you are, even if it didn’t get SOSA more than a two count! Mr. DEDEDE has finally gotten back to his feet, and now he turns right towards SOSA- ALLOWING SOSA HENDERSON TO BEGIN CHARGING IN, AND LOOKING FOR A HUGE SPEAR-
Persephone: OH COME ON, DEDEDE JUST GOT A KNEE UP AND HIT SOSA IN THE HEAD WITH IT! THAT WAS MY CHANCE TO SEE THE MATCH END, AND MR. DEDEDE JUST RUINED IT!!!
Stew-O: SOSA HENDERSON GETS BACK TO HIS FEET HOLDING HIS HEAD, AND NOW MR. DEDE KICKS SOSA IN THE MIDSECTION BEFORE PULLING HIM IN FOR THE IMPALER!!!! THE IMPALER CONNECTS ON SOSA HENDERSON, AND WITH THOSE FEW MOVES MR. DEDEDE JUST TURNED THIS MATCH AROUND COMPLETELY, GIVING HIMSELF CONTROL OF THIS ONE AND QUITE POSSIBLY WINNING THE MATCH ENTIRELY, AS SOSA HENDERSON IS OUT!!!! MR. DEDEDE HOOKS THE LEGS, IS THAT ALL FOR THIS ONE OR CAN SOSA HENDERSON FIND THE KICKOUT!?!?
OOOOONNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!
TTTTTTWWWWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!
TTTTHHHHHRRRREEEEEEEEEEE-
Gavin Kirkland: SOSA HENDERSON GETS THE SHOULDER UP!!!! That was a close one, Mr. DEDEDE nearly had the match won entirely right there! I’m actually surprised this match is still going, there’s been a few times now where I actually thought it might’ve been over!
Persephone: Ugh, I know. I might’ve even called this match decent if it ended fast enough, but it missed the mark around fifteen minutes ago. Now it just keeps getting worse and worse.
Gavin Kirkland: Has the match even been going for fifteen minutes yet?
Persephone: I don’t know, but it feels like we’ve been here for hours.
Stew-O: Mr. DEDEDE slowly makes it back up to his feet, and I don’t think he looks too bothered that SOSA kicked out. The look of focus on his face is unmatched, and that right there is part of the reason Mr. DEDEDE has been able to accomplish so much. Mr. DEDEDE is pulling SOSA up to his feet now, AND MR. DEDEDE KNEES SOSA IN THE MIDSECTION BEFORE LIFTING SOSA UP ONTO THE TOP ROPE, SEEMINGLY LOOKING TO RETURN THE FAVOR FOR WHAT SOSA DID A LITTLE WHILE AGO!The tides have really turned in this one!
Gavin Kirkland: You’re right about that one! Mr. DEDEDE is heading up top, AND NOW HE’S TRYING TO HOOK THE ARMS!!! MR. DEDEDE MIGHT BE TRYING TO DELIVER THE AVALANCHE BUTTERFLY EFFECT, AND IF THAT CONNECTS AFTER WHAT THE IMPALER JUST DID, THAT MIGHT BE GAME OVER FOR SOSA! THERE’S JUST NO WAY SOSA’S BODY COULD KEEP TAKING HITS LIKE THAT!
Persephone: More reason why DEDEDE should hurry up and hit the move! I have places to be, I don’t have all day! This isn’t even the main event match, do you really think I can afford to sit through this trash!???
Stew-O: MR. DEDEDE HAS ONE OF THE ARMS HOOKED, BUT SOSA HENDERSON USES HIS OTHER ARM TO GRAB ONTO THE TOP ROPE, AND IT LOOKS LIKE HE’S PULLING HIMSELF OVER THE TOP ROPE AND OUT ONTO THE APRON! MR. DEDEDE LOOKS TO TRY AND PULL HIM BACK, BUT SOSA HENDERSON MANAGES TO LAND AN ELBOW BEFORE LANDING OUT ON THE APRON- ALLOWING SOSA TO PUSH MR. DEDEDE’S LEGS OUT FROM UNDER HIM, CAUSING THE CHAIRMAN TO GO FACE FIRST INTO THE TOP TURNBUCKLE! MR. DEDEDE STUMBLES AWAY FROM THE CORNER, AND NOW SOSA HENDERSON GOES FOR A SPRINGBOARD-
Gavin Kirkland: DEMOLITION!!!!! DEMOLITION CONNECTS ON SOSA HENDERSON IN MID-AIR!!!! SOSA WAS JUST TAKEN RIGHT OUT OF THE SKY WITH THE DEMOLITION, BUT LOOK AT THAT!!!! SOSA HENDERSON MANAGED TO ROLL OUT OF THE RING BEFORE MR. DEDEDE COULD GO FOR THE COVER, AND THAT RING AWARENESS MIGHT’VE JUST SAVED THE MATCH FOR SOSA, AS I DON’T THINK HE WOULD’VE BEEN ABLE TO KICK OUT OF A CUTTER LIKE THAT ONE!!! SOSA Henderson has been fighting an uphill battle for the last few moments but we’ve seen what he can do once he actually manages to get the upper hand!
Persephone: What he can do?? He hasn’t done anything! His best move so far got him a two count!
Stew-O: Well we need to remember that he’s not just facing anybody. This is Mr. DEDEDE, and I think anybody would be struggling in SOSA’s position, which makes how good of a fight SOSA has put up that much more impressive! Mr. DEDEDE has rolled out of the ring, but this time around he doesn’t look too interested in using the outside environment to his advantage. Instead he sends SOSA Henderson right back into this ring so he can put this match away, and with the condition SOSA is in, I think this one is about to end very soon!
Gavin Kirkland: Mr. DEDEDE slides back into the ring, AND NOW HE RUNS THE ROPES BEFORE-
Stew-O: SPPEEEEAAAAARRRRRR!!!!!!!
Gavin Kirkland: BY SOSA HENDERSON!!!!!
Stew-O: SOSA HENDERSON JUST HIT MR. DEDEDE WITH THE SPEAR!!!! SOSA HENDERSON BURST TO HIS FEET AND CUT MR. DEDEDE IN HALF JUST AS HE BOUNCED OFF OF THE ROPES, AND NOW SOSA HENDERSON DROPS DOWN ON TOP OF MR. DEDEDE FOR THE COVER, KNOWING THAT THIS MATCH IS ABOUT TO COME TO AN END!!!
OOOOONNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!
TTTTTTWWWWWWWOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
TTTTTHHHHHRRRREEEEEEEEE-
Persephone: BRO, I THOUGHT YOU SAID THE MATCH WAS ABOUT TO END!!!!!! WHY DID MR. DEDEDE STILL GET THE SHOULDER UP???
Gavin Kirkland: I thought this match was about to end too! That was the spear, a move that SOSA Henderson has been doing for a while as well! It’s not like he just stole Mr. DEDEDE’s finishing move, SOSA utilized one of the best moves he had in his arsenal and it didn’t get the job done!
Persephone: This is so stupid, the match should be over right now. Why am I being forced to sit through this???
Stew-O: I didn’t think Mr. DEDEDE would find the kickout, and seeing that SOSA nearly got a three count for the first time in this match, I think I had every right to believe that! SOSA Henderson barely has the energy to react right now, but needless to say he’s not happy that Mr. DEDEDE is still in this match. SOSA Henderson slowly rolls off of the Chairman, and at this point I genuinely can’t say I have any idea what it’ll take to put Mr. DEDEDE down. It has been done in the past, but it’s well documented that it takes a lot to pick up a victory over this man, so much that some may see a win over him as an achievement in itself.
Gavin Kirkland: SOSA HENDERSON JUST PUT MR. DEDEDE IN A CROSSFACE!!!! I DON’T KNOW IF THIS IS OUT OF DESPERATION OR IF SOSA FULLY BELIEVES HE CAN MAKE MR. DEDEDE TAP OUT, BUT SOSA JUST LOCKED HIM IN A CROSSFACE, ONE OF HIS SIGNATURE SUBMISSION MOVES!!!! MR. DEDEDE NOW IS STRUGGLING AS SOSA HENDERSON PULLS BACK ON HIS HEAD, AND MR. DEDEDE DIDN’T EVEN HAVE A CHANCE TO STOP SOSA FROM LOCKING IT IN, NOT WHEN SOSA JUST HIT HIM WITH A SPEAR MOMENTS AGO!!!
Persephone: Does this mean we might finally be seeing the end of the match, because I have been waiting WAYYY too long to get to this point!
Stew-O: I COULDN’T TELL YOU THE LAST TIME MR. DEDEDE TAPPED OUT, IF THERE’S EVEN A TIME HE HAS, BUT I CAN TELL YOU THAT HE’S DEFINITELY IN A LOT OF PAIN RIGHT NOW JUDGING BY THE LOOK ON HIS FACE!!! Mr. DEDEDE is super resilient but that won’t matter if SOSA is able to do enough damage, and seeing how close that spear brought SOSA to victory, I think he might’ve done enough!
Gavin Kirkland: Mr. DEDEDE tapping out right now would definitely shock the world, and I don’t think there’s anyone that’d love that more than SOSA Henderson! SOSA Henderson has also had time to finally recover as all he’s doing right now is holding onto that crossface and making sure Mr. DEDEDE isn’t able to get out of it, so I think things might actually be working in SOSA’s favor! I don’t know if Mr. DEDEDE will be able to make it to the ropes, is he actually gonna have to tap out-
Persephone: :francis: I shouldn’t have expected anything less.
Stew-O: MR. DEDEDE HAS MADE IT UP TO A KNEE, AND NOW HE IS SLOWLY GETTING TO HIS FEET WHILE TURNING TO HIS SIDE, ALLOWING HIM TO HIT SOSA WITH A HUGE RIGHT HAND AND ESCAPE THE SUBMISSION!!! MR. DEDEDE IS BACK TO HIS FEET AND NOW SLOWLY SOSA HENDERSON IS STUMBLING BACK UP AS WELL, BUT MR. DEDEDE IT TAKING THE CHANCE TO CAPITALIZE ON THAT COUNTER JUST A FEW SECONDS AGO!!! MR. DEDEDE GRABS SOSA HENDERSON, AND HE GOES FOR THE GRAND SLAM-
Gavin Kirkland: NO!! SOSA HENDERSON JUMPED OUT OF THE WAY, AND NOW HE HITS MR. DEDEDE WITH AN ELBOW!!! Mr. DEDEDE stayed standing, AND NOW MR. DEDEDE FIRES BACK WITH A FOREARM SMASH OF HIS OWN!!! SOSA HENDERSON BACKPEDALS INTO THE ROPES, AND AS HE BOUNCES OFF HE LOOKS FOR A ANOTHER BICYCLE KNEE, BUT MR. DEDEDE AVOIDS IT AND CLOTHESLINES SOSA HENDERSON OUT OF THE RING!!! SOSA HENDERSON MANAGED TO HANG ONTO THE ROPES AND LAND ON THE APRON THOUGH, AND AS MR. DEDEDE GOES AFTER HIM SOSA MANAGES TO DUCK DOWN THROUGH THE ROPES AND SEND HIS SHOULDER INTO MR. DEDEDE’s MIDSECTION!
Persephone: Can the referee count or something? SOSA’s technically outside of the ring. That’s gotta be at least a ten count by now.
Stew-O: SOSA HENDERSON NOW WITH THE SLINGSHOT- RIGHT INTO MR. DEDEDE’S ARMS!!! MR. DEDEDE GRABBED SOSA HENDERSON IN THE DOUBLE UNDERHOOK, AND NOW MR. DEDEDE LIFTS SOSA UP BEFORE FINALLY DELIVERING THE BUTTERFLY EFFECT!!! THE BUTTERFLY EFFECT CONNECTS, BUT MR. DEDEDE DOESN’T STOP THERE!!! MR. DEDEDE PULLS SOSA HENDERSON INTO A DOUBLE UNDERHOOK ONCE AGAIN, BEFORE LIFTING HIM UP AND DELIVERING A SECOND BUTTERFLY EFFECT!!! MR. DEDEDE WITH TWO BUTTERFLY EFFECTS IN A ROW, AND NOW THERE’S THE COVER TO PUT THIS MATCH AWAY!!!
OOOOOONNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!
TTTTTWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
TTTTTHHHHHHRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!
Gavin Kirkland: AND SOSA HENDERSON GETS THE SHOULDER UP JUST BEFORE THREE!!!!!! THAT WAS SO CLOSE, THAT WAS AS CLOSE AS IT COULD’VE COME TO A THREE COUNT AND SOMEHOW SOSA STAYS IN THE MATCH!!!! I can’t believe it, how is this match not over!??? Those butterfly effects were devastating, I really didn’t think SOSA would be able to keep going after that!
Persephone: This old man really sucks at his job, you know that? It’s just SOSA Henderson, his only World title reign happened because he robbed Rexy. He’s not a good wrestler.
Stew-O: Mr. DEDEDE slowly gets back up, and I think he might actually be a bit annoyed that SOSA Henderson keeps kicking out! These two have utilized so much of the moves they have in store that even I’m not too sure what more they could have left, but Mr. DEDEDE is dragging SOSA up now, and he’d know a lot better than I do. Mr. DEDEDE now, stomping away at SOSA Henderson! The referee is about to begin a count, but Mr. DEDEDE backs away before it’s even necessary! SOSA Henderson now in a seated position in the corner as Mr. DEDEDE backs up, AND NOW HE CHARGES IN- HE’S GOING FOR THE RAPTURE!!!
Gavin Kirkland: SOSA HENDERSON JUST DOVE OUT OF THE WAY!!! SOSA HENDERSON AVOIDS THE RAPTURE, AND NOW HE’S GRABBING THE ROPES TO QUICKLY TRY AND HELP HIMSELF UP! MR. DEDEDE CHARGES BACK AT HIM- BUT SOSA HENDERSON LANDS A BACK ELBOW AS HE FINALLY MAKES IT BACK UP TO HIS FEET! SOSA HENDERSON NOW TURNING AROUND AND HE GOES FOR A ROUNDHOUSE KICK, BUT MR. DEDEDE DUCKS UNDER IT BEFORE KICKING SOSA IN THE MIDSECTION! MR. DEDEDE GOES FOR ANOTHER IMPALER!
Persephone: But SOSA Henderson stopped it by landing on his feet instead of allowing DEDEDE to drop him on his face. SOSA pushes DEDEDE away from him now, and there goes all the excitement.
Stew-O: SOSA HENDERSON RUNS IN, BUT MR. DEDEDE POPS SOSA UP INTO A POWERBOMB POSITION!! MR. DEDEDE HAS SOSA HENDERSON UP ON HIS SHOULDERS, BUT SOSA HENDERSON IS DESPERATELY PUNCHING AWAY AT MR. DESEDE AND DOING EVERYTHING HE CAN TO FORCE MR. DEDEDE TO LET GO OF HIM! HURRICANRANA!!! SOSA HENDERSON CONNECTS WITH A HURRICANRANA, AND SOSA QUICKLY FOLLOWS IT UP WITH A JUMPING DOUBLE FOOT STOMP!!!
Gavin Kirkland: SOSA HENDERSON RUNS THE ROPES WHILE MR. DEDEDE SITS UP IN PAIN, BUT MR. DEDEDE DUCKS UNDER THE KICK SOSA WAS LOOKING FOR!!!! Mr. DEDEDE is back up, AND HE HITS SOSA WITH A BOOT TO THE HEAD, CAUSING SOSA TO STUMBLE TOWARDS THE ROPES!!! Mr. DEDEDE now grabbing SOSA and he sends him into the ropes- WAIT NO!!! SOSA HENDERSON JUMPS ONTO THE MIDDLE ROPE, DELIVERING A SPRINGBOARD MOONSAULT THAT TAKES MR. DEDEDE DOWN!!!!
Persephone: This match would be so much better if SOSA would just go for the cover, but for some reason he isn’t doing that! I can’t stand this guy.
Stew-O: SOSA HENDERSON IS HEADING UP TO THE TOP ROPE, AND IN THE MEANTIME MR. DEDEDE IS STILL DOWN ON THE MAT!!!! MR. DEDEDE IS DOWN AND AT THIS POINT I’M STARTING TO THINK SOSA HENDERSON MIGHT ACTUALLY HAVE THIS MATCH WON! SOSA HENDERSON FINDS HIS PLACE AT THE TOP ROPE, AND NOW HE DIVES OFF, CONNECTING WITH THE PAID IN FULL!!!!!! THE PAID IN FULL CONNECTS ON MR. DEDEDE, AND THAT’S GOTTA BE IT!!!! THAT HAS TO BE THE END OF THE MATCH, THERE’S NO WAY THIS ONE CAN CONTINUE AFTER THE DIVING CURB STOMP JUST CONNECTED!!! SOSA HENDERSON WITH THE COVER!!!!!
OOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!
TTTTTWWWWWWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
TTTTHHHHHRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!
Gavin Kirkland: WHAT???????
Persephone: WHY?????????
Stew-O: MR. DEDEDE GETS THE SHOULDER UP JUST BEFORE THREE!!!!!! HOW DID HE DO IT???? HOW DID MR. DEDEDE STAY IN THIS MATCH, HE JUST GOT HIT WITH THE BEST MOVE IN SOSA HENDERSON’S ARSENAL!!!! SOSA HENDERSON CAN’T BELIEVE THAT THE BELL DIDN’T RING, AND I DON’T THINK ANYONE ELSE CAN BELIEVE IT EITHER! Even I can’t believe it, but then again, this is Mr. DEDEDE we’re talking about! I thought SOSA Henderson might’ve actually had this one, but after a kickout like that, I honestly have no idea who’ll win!
Gavin Kirkland: SOSA Henderson takes a while to get back up since this match clearly took a toll on him, and like you said Stew, SOSA is just as surprised as the rest of us! I don’t really think he has the time to worry about that though, he needs to finish this one before Mr. DEDEDE has the opportunity to get back into it!
Persephone: For once in my life I have to agree with Gavin. Finishing the match should be everyone’s main priority in a match that’s not No-DQ. Preferably finishing the match as soon as possible.
Stew-O: SOSA Henderson is pulling Mr. DEDEDE back up, and clearly he isn’t out of ideas just yet, which is something that you have to give SOSA props for! Many people would be deflated after a kickout like that, but instead SOSA is still looking to put this one away! SOSA Henderson now sending Mr. DEDEDE into the corner before running in- SUPERKICK!!! SOSA HENDERSON JUST HIT THE SUPERKICK, AND USUALLY THAT’D BE A JUMPING SUPERKICK IF SOSA IS SETTING UP FOR WHAT I THINK HE IS, BUT AFTER ALL THE THINGS MR. DEDEDE SAID ABOUT HEART BREAK BOY, SOSA IS ABOUT TO TRY AND PUT MR. DEDEDE DOWN WITH HIS MOVE!
Gavin Kirkland: SOSA JUMPS UP FOR THE DDT!!!! DEADSHOT-
Persephone: :yikes:
Gavin Kirkland: MR. DEDEDE JUST THREW SOSA OVER HIS HEAD!!!! MR. DEDEDE JUST COLLAPSED TO A KNEE AND IS HOLDING ONTO THE ROPES TO PULL HIMSELF AWAY FROM THE CORNER, BUT HE JUST AVOIDED THE DEADSHOT!!! SOSA Henderson luckily managed to grab onto the ropes and land on the apron, avoiding a nasty fall!! SOSA Henderson quickly rushes up to the top rope now, AND HE DIVES AT MR. DEDEDE BEFORE CONNECTING WITH A-
Stew-O: SPPPEEEEEAAAAAAAARRRRR!!!!!!!
Gavin Kirkland: :krabs:
Persephone: Finally.
Stew-O: MR. DEDEDE JUST HIT SOSA HENDERSON WITH THE SPEAR!!!!! SOSA HENDERSON TRIED TO DIVE AT MR. DEDEDE TO FOLLOW UP WITH THAT SUPERKICK, BUT MR. DEDEDE USED WHATEVER STRENGTH HE HAD LEFT TO JUMP UP AND SPEAR SOSA HENDERSON OUT OF THE SKY!!!! MR. DEDEDE IS ON TOP OF SOSA HENDERSON FOR THE COVER, AND I THINK THIS ONE MIGHT ACTUALLY BE OVER!!!!!!!
OOOOOOONNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!
TTTTTTWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!
TTTTTTTHHHHRRREEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!
Gavin Kirkland: WAIT A SECOND, SOSA HENDERSON’S FOOT IS UNDER THE ROPE!!!! HIS FOOT IS UNDER THE ROPE!!!!
(Ding! Ding! Ding!)
Gavin Kirkland: :krabs:
Bella Braxton: Here is your winner….. MIIIISSTTTERRRRRRRR DEEEEEDDEEEEEDEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!
Stew-O: :lupe: Mr. DEDEDE just picked up the victory, but like Gavin Kirkland said, SOSA Henderson had a foot under the rope! The referee missed it because Mr. DEDEDE was laid out on top of SOSA, and while that spear may have been devastating, Mr. DEDEDE might’ve gotten very lucky as this match should’ve continued!
Gavin Kirkland: That was a really good match, but I’m shocked! It was a huge question whether or not SOSA Henderson could legitimately defeat Mr. DEDEDE, and in the end, even though he lost, I’m still not really sure how I’d answer that! Mr. DEDEDE won, but if the referee saw that rope break, who knows what would have happened?
Persephone: I do. We would’ve been forced to keep watching one of the most boring matches I’ve ever seen. I’m so glad DEDEDE was too fat for the referee to see that rope break, I didn’t need to keep watching this.
Stew-O: Mr. DEDEDE is slowly rolling off of SOSA, and I honestly don’t even know if he realizes what just happened! As soon as he hit the spear he dropped down on top of SOSA, and that was it! Nonetheless, congratulations to Mr. DEDEDE, as he is the man walking out of Battle of Egypt with the victory!
(‘Range Brothers’ begins playing, and it takes a little while, but slowly Mr. DEDEDE does find his way back up to his feet as the crowd begin to boo, partially thanks to the accidental oversight from the referee. Mr. DEDEDE has his hand raised. Mr. DEDEDE slowly makes his way out of the ring, and as SOSA Henderson slowly wakes back up, he’s pretty clearly upset about the loss. As Mr. DEDEDE makes his way back up the ramp, Battle of Egypt fades from ringside.)
(The camera pans to the middle of the ring as Bella Braxton is ready to call the Main Event as the match graphic is displayed and the arena erupts in cheers.)
Bella Braxton: THE FOLLOWING CONTEST IS THE MAIN EVENT OF THE EVENING AND IT IS SCHEDULED FOR ONE FALL!!!
Crowd: ONE FALL!!!!
Bella Braxton: INTRODUCING FIRST FROM ATHERTON, CALIFORNIA! WEIGHING IN AT 210 POUNDS! HE IS ‘THE NEW”…. JAKE SMITH!!!!!
(‘We’re In Hell’ by SycAmour starts to play throughout the arena as Jake Smith slowly walks out, the second time he is coming out to wrestle by first opening the show and now closing it. He looks out as the crowd cheers, some boo as he nods and stays focused at the ring and he makes his way down the ramp.)
Stew-O: This is Jake Smith’s second match and after a brutal opening contest, against two other tag teams to open the broadcast but now he has to dig deep inside and go up against a legend in Ronn Banks! This is the chance Jake has waited for to prove otherwise to any of his doubters.
Gavin Kirkland: Whether it is his long sexy hair or his Honey Bun abs, Jake Smith is going to show why he is the marathon man! He opened Battle of Egypt and now has the chance to close it out with arguably the biggest win of his career!
Persephone: I personally don’t care about Jake Smith, his “Legend Killer” status or what this means for Voltage, he already lost once tonight, he’s going to lose again, and nobody will care.
(Jake gets to the ring and poses as the crowd cheers him. He stands there for a moment, turning his attention to the ring as his theme fades and is replaced by “Shock The World” by Lloyd Banks as the cr4owd once again erupts in huge cheers as Ronn Banks slowly walks out, looking at the crowd while in the entry way, he then nods puts his hand to the ear wanting an even bigger pop screaming “I Can’t Hear You!”, the stadium is deafening as Banks makes his way toward the ring.)
Bella Braxton: AND HIS OPPONENT! FROM NEWARK, NEW JERSEY! WEIGHING IN AT 220 POUNDS! HE IS THE PLK….. RONN BANKS!!!!!
(The deafening sounds of the crowd continue to buzz as Banks makes it to the ring, rolling in and sitting in the middle as Jake Smith glares at him, the two catch each other’s eyes and the tension can be felt.)
Stew-O : These are the moments we live for in professional wrestling and none more truer than right now as Ronn Banks has made his way to the ring, ready to face Jake Smith here in our main event!
Gavin Kirkland: Legend, though he is one ruthless bastard, but I like that about Banks. Jake needs to do one thing that will give him any chance in the match.
Stew-O: What is that?
Gavin Kirkland: Run!
Persephone: The world has stopped; I actually agree with the Showdown perv! Yes run so we can enjoy the rest of our time here!
(Banks is back up to his feet as the music dies down. Both men stare at one another and meet in the ring as the referee checks on both and then calls for the bell….)
(DING!!! DING!!! DING!!!)
Stew-O: They quickly circle the ring and listen to this stadium erupt, the longer this match goes, the better it will be for Banks, he is fresh, stamina is on his side after Jake Smith already wrestled once tonight. Here we go, the lock up! Jake is able to get the side headlock, standing his ground, doing the best he can to wear down Banks in the opening minute of this match, Banks pushes off, Smith bounces off the ropes, SHOULDER BLOCK BY BANKS! Smith goes down!
(Jake Smith looks up at Ronn Banks a bit shocked as the Hall of Famer smiles and paces telling Jake to get up who is at a seated position. He slowly gets back to his feet and circles the ring again before they lock up….)
Persephone: Okay, this is lame already, can we actually like punch someone? I don’t want to call a wrestling match; I want to call a fight! Here they go with another boring lock-up, Banks old ass has Jake now in a headlock and Jake pushes him off, he hits the ropes, Jake with a leapfrog, that was athletic, Banks comes around, Jake drops to the floor, Banks hops over him and …. Hip toss by Jake on Banks and that caught the old fart by surprise! Me too, Jake did a wrestling move!
(This time Banks looks up at Jake who smirks while pacing, telling the legend to get back up as the crowd seems rather mixed cheering both men…)
Stew-O: It was Jake Smith who got the upper hand on that exchange, able to connect with a hip toss and this is the feeling out process, Banks could have come right out and really put Jake to the ropes, but many feel he wants to prove a point, outwrestle him, doesn’t feel like he has lived up to the potential.
Gavin Kirkland: I think it is more than that, professional jealousy too! Think about it, Jake is better looking, he has been with some of the hottest women on the roster, his face is everywhere on the promotional posters and EAW Network, he is one of the faces in the EAW and Banks hates that! He wants to make an example out of him and that alone is the reason why this match is happening right now! Banks is back up and they circle one more time, locking up, Banks gets the head lock, no! He whips him into the turnbuckle! Jake rushes in, big boot by Banks! Jake stumbles out of the corner, Banks rushes him…. NO! JAKE SMITH CATCHES HIM IN AN OVER THE HEAD BELLY TO BACK SUPLEX!
Persephone: Finally, an impact move and not this boring wrestling crap! Capitalize on him now! This old bastard can’t take that much of a beating!
Stew-O: He defeated Andre Walker.
Persephone: Thanks for killing my buzz, ass.
Stew-O: Banks is down but he is slowly getting back up, holding his neck, he awkwardly landed on it, as we see on the replay!
(The replay shows Ronn Banks landing awkwardly on the top of his head, neck, the landing looked pretty rough but as the referee checks on Banks he shrugs it off and slowly grabs the ropes as Jake comes in…)
Stew-O: Jake Smith senses blood! Grabbing Banks, a forearm! And another! The skin can be heard smacking on the face of Banks! Irish Whip into the ropes, Jake runs against the ropes, he tries to bounce back on Banks, clothesline, and Banks DUCKS, Smith missed, he springs off the other ropes and BANKS WITH A FLYING BODYPRESS! BUT JAKE SMITH KICKS OUT BEFORE A COUNT! ARM DRAGE THE SECOND JAKE WAS ABLE TO GET UP, AND ANOTHER! BANKS HAS TAKEN CONTROL AND JAKE GOES AFTER BANKS, SIDESTEP, HE TRIPPED HIM UP AND BANKS WALKS ALL OVER THE BACK OF JAKE IN A SHOW OF DISRESPECT!
(Jake quickly sits up glaring bullets at Banks who holds his neck, wincing but cracking a smirk as he taunts Jake to get back up. Jake is back up, circling the ring as Banks gestures for him to go after the Legend…)
Gavin Kirkland: Jake is back up and I’m going to talk smart here for a second….
Persephone: Don’t hurt yourself.
Gavin Kirkland: Whatever… anyway, Jake Smith is wrestling at Banks pace, which is methodical and playing right into his game. It’s like I do my women.
Persephone: You are so pathetic and stupid. This match is boring because Jake is allowing an old geezer to dictate it, that is basically what you are trying to say. Well Jake sucks, I think we all know that already. Jake is falling right for his trap; he is literally being outsmarted and it’s pretty sad.
Stew-O: It’s the feeling out process in the early goings of this match! Banks has an answer for Jake, but we have to note that he still landed awkwardly on his neck, and it is definitely something to keep an eye on! Jake looks to lock up again, and Banks obliges, but Jake quickly gets behind Banks, runs him to the ropes with a roll up!
ONE!!!!!!
TW…..
Gavin Kirkland: Banks rolls over and now has Jake Smith for the pinfall!
ONE!!!!!
TW……
Persephone: Oh, come on! Jake kicks out, why! And lures Banks into an inside cradle, please pin him!
ONE!!!!
TWO….
Persephone: WHY!?!?! Banks reverses it, I’ll take it!
ONE!!!!
TWO…..
Gavin Kirkland: Banks kicks out, and Jake goes to grab Banks but stepover take down and he rolls on him for a side headlock and these two are wrestling! Putting on a clinic here and that is pissing Persephone off! Banks turns Jake on his shoulders for the pin!
ONE!!!!
TWO!!!!
Gavin Kirkland: Banks turns his momentum back and Persephone is loving two sweaty men trying to up one another!
Persephone: Ewww…. Gross.
(Banks holds on to the side headlock tight, Jake though tries to turn him once again to the side but instead Jake gets on his knees and is able to plant his boots, hooking Banks from around the waist….)
Steve-O: BACK BODY DROP AND AGAIN BANKS LANDS HARD ON HIS NECK AND JAKE SMITH KNOWS IT! HE PICKS UP BANKS, PICKS HIM UP FOR A SUPLEX… RIGHT INTO AN AOVER THE KNEE NECKBREAKER! BANKS IS DOWN HARD ON THE MAT FOR THE COVER!
ONE!!!!!!!!!!
TWO!!!!!!!!!!
TH….
Steve-O: BANKS WITH A SHOULDER UP! Jake sighs but he knows that in order to put away someone like4 Ronn Banks, he is going to have to do a lot more than that! Jake picks up Banks, front face lock again, this time, he is slowly turning Banks backwards going for a Rude Awakening Neck breaker, Jake Smith is working on the neck, NO! Banks reverses… DDT! He planted Jake Smith, but he is not going for a cover! Banks is hurt, holding his neck but slowly is back up! Banks takes a moment, as he has Jake down, Banks runs against the ropes, CORKSCREW ELBOW AND NOW BANKS LIFTS JAKE BY THE HAIR AND ON TO HIS SHOULDERS! HE IS GOING FOR GO TO RETIREM… NO! JAKE WITH AN ELBOW! AND ANOTHER! BANKS DROPS JAKE BACK TO HIS FEET, HE TURNS AND SPINEBUST…. NO! BANKS FLOATS OVER AND LANDS ON HIS FEET, ROUNDHOUSE KICK AND HE HIT JAKE FLUSH IN THE HEAD! HE FALLS TO THE MATS AND ROLLS OUT OF THE RING!
(Jake lands hard on the floor. Lying there for a moment as Banks is able to get a small breather. He looks as the referee is about to administer the count, but Banks stops in as he is about to make the first count…)
Ronn Banks: (Off Mic) I don’t think so.
(The referee looks a bit shocked but then shrugs his shoulders and obliges.)
Persephone: Great, so now the referee isn’t going to make a count on Jake Smith who clearly isn’t going to make it to the ring, is that what you are telling me? We are going to be here ALL night now. Will someone step up and win!
Gavin Kirkland: Ronna Banks doesn’t want to waste his time with count outs, he wants this match to have a clear winner, that’s actually really manly. He reminds everyone of me, the chivalry I have and….
Persephone: This is the last match, are we really going to do this right now!? Don’t make this anymore painful than what it is!
Stew-O: In the ring, Ronn Banks is watching as Jake is starting to get back up, the uses the ring apron for assistance and wait…. HERE COMES RONN BANKS RUNNING ACROSS THE RING AND SUICIDE DIVE ON JAKE SMITH! HE CRUSHES HIM AGAINST THE METAL BARRIER!
Crowd: THIS IS AWESOME!!!!! THIS IS AWESOME!!!! THIS IS AWESOME!!!!!
(The crowd erupts in cheers as Banks looks up at the crowd and smirks, picking up Jake Smith and throwing him right back in the ring. Banks climbs the top rope, waiting as Jake is slowly rolling to his stomach, he gets to his knees….)
Stew-O: Banks is perched up on the top rope! Jake is up and Banks comes down with a Double Axe Handle… NO! JAKE DROPS TO ONE KNEE AND STRIKES BANSK IN THE MIDSECTION! BANKS FLIPS FROM THE IMPACT ON HIS BACK AND JAKE SPRINGS OFF THE ROPES, LEG DROP! HE ROLLS BACK ON HIS FEET AND A SECOND LEG DROP, ROLLING ON HIS FEET ONE MORE TIME FOR A THIRD LEG DROP!
(The crowd cheers as Jake nods, holding his back and picks Banks up, kicking him again in the midsection, running against the ropes…)
Persephone: SNAP SWINGING NECKBREAKER! BROKEN WINGS! YES! BREAK HIS NECK JAKE AND PIN HIM!
Gavin Kirkland: Jake might be hurt but he is wrestling such a smart match! Working on the neck! Jake sits Banks up, stiff dropkick in the back of the head and the whiplash alone was effective as he is down and out! Jake goes for a pin, and he could get the win!
Persephone: We could not be so lucky!
ONE!!!!!!!!
TWO!!!!!!!
TH….
Persephone: This is getting annoying. The fossil kicks out! Typical Jake the failure, typical Jake the guy who can never win the big one. This is no different! He is way in over his head instead of just saving face, saving us all from watching him lose and just walk out to allow us all the ability to go back to our hotel and enjoy a nice peaceful evening, but instead we need to watch Jake mess things up like he always does. Just beat him!
Steve-O: Jake doesn’t look pleased, but he is not going to stop focusing on the neck, sitting banks up and Jake drives a knee into the top of his back! Jake wrenches Banks head back and looks for a submission! Maybe trying to wear him down further as Banks screams in pain! Jake driving the knee to the ball of the neck!
(Jake’s hands placed firmly under the chin of Banks, pulling back hard as he can. Bending the neck as Banks continues to scream in pain.)
Jake Smith: (Off Mic) ASK HIM REF!
Referee: (Off Mic) What do you say, Banks!?
Ronn Banks: (Off Mic) NO!
(Jake pulls back even more, this time Banks is staring right up at the lights as he tries to break out but can’t, too much pressure on his neck that is slowly forcing him to fade….)
Persephone: I take everything back! If he renders Banks unconscious righty now, I will hug Jake! And then take an Epson salt shower! Come on Jake! I am cheering for you! Pull back on that neck! Break it even! Do whatever you can! I really think Banks is losing consciousness! I can’t believe it! About ten minutes into this match, 9 minutes too fast and banks is fading! This is wonderful! This is incredible! He is going limp! The referee is starting to check on him!
(The referee lifts Banks arm and it drops….)
Referee: ONE!
Persephone: It dropped once! Oh please… oh please!
(The referee lifts Banks arm again, and it drops….)
Referee: TWO!
Persephone: Yes! Yes… this is over!
Gavin Kirkland: What a huge win this would be Jake Smith if he were to get a victory like this! He would truly be the Legend Killer! One more arm to raise, I’m getting too excited here…
Persephone: So gross!
(The referee lifts Banks arm one last time and it….)
Persephone: DROP! YE…. NO!!!!!
(Banks arm doesn’t drop as the crowd erupts in cheers. Jake’s eyes widen as Banks starts to get movement throughout his body and the adrenaline rush is just too much for Jake to handle. Banks is back up on his feet, Jake though holds on to the move….)
Stew-O: BANKS WITH A STIFF ELBOW! AND ANOTHER! JAKE RELEASES THE HOLD AND BANKS HITS THE ROPES, SHOULDER TACKLE AND JAKE GOES DOWN! BANKS RUNS AGAINST THE OPPOSITE SIDE AND JAKE IS BACK UP, CLOTHESLINE THAT TAKES JAKE DOWN! BANKS THOUGH GRABS HIS LEGS, WRAPS THEM AND TURNS HIM OVER INTO A TEXAS CLOVERLEAF AND NOW BANKS HAS JAKE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE RING AND NOWHERE TO GO!
(Jake frantically tries to reach the ropes, but he can’t…… screaming and pounding his fists in the mat as Banks finally squats down adding more pressure as the crowd explodes in cheers….)
Crowd: THIS IS WRESTLING!!!! THIS IS WRESTLING!!!! THIS IS WRESTLING!!!
Persephone: You know what, screw Jake Smith! Make him tap out, Ronn Banks! I won’t call you old anymore if you just make him tap out! Please! Break his back, I don’t care what you do! Do something!
Gavin Kirkland: He has that locked in tight and Jake has nowhere to go! If he is able to…. Wait a second…. Wait a second! Jake Smith is planting his fists on the mat and trying to lift himself up! He powers off the mat while Banks keeps the pressure on! It’s like a game of naked twister!
Persephone: I’m not even going to ask.
Stew-O: Jake Smith is doing his best to power out but is it going to be enough! Jake is trying to arch his body and take away some of the pressure on his lower back from that hold, but Banks is not letting him and actually locking the move in even tighter! But jake is doing his best to continue forcing his body up and….. JAKE LOSES HIS LEGS TO POWER OUT AND CAUSE BANKS TO LOSE BALANCE AND FALL FORWARD! BANKS THOUGH IS RIGHT BACK UP, JAKE SMITH IS ON THE MAT HOLDING HIS BACK IN PAIN! YET HE WAS ABLE TO STOP BANKS FROM REALLY PUNISHING HIM ANY FURTHER!
Persephone: I hate this…. Two Elitists trying to one up each other and actually wrestle, what every happened to humility, huh? I mean seriously!? Banks is back to Jake, and he grabs his legs, dragging him over to the middle of the ring, maybe this time he won’t mess it up and …. Jake with a roll up! COME ON!
ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
TWO!!!!!!!!!!!!!
THRE…..
Persephone: …. The pain…..another kick out by Banks! Though to his credit, Banks is right back at Jake kicking him while he is down, lifting Jake up and Irish Whipping him into the turnbuckle. Banks charges in with a high knee that connects, he hits Jake flush in face, finally! He looks wobbly and Banks sits Jake on the top turnbuckle, a couple of palm thrusts and Jake is all dazed and confused, just finish it here please! HURRICANRANA OFF THE TOP ROPE AND JAKE CRASHES!
Gavin Kirkland: IT IS NOT DONE THOUGH, BANKS IS BACK ON THE TOPE ROPE, HE STANDS THERE PERCHED AND FLYING DRACO! HE CONNECTS AND MAYBE PERSEPHONE WILL GET HER WISH AS HE HOOKS THE FAR LEG FOR THE COVER!
ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
TWO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
THREE…..
Persephone: This is getting ridiculous! Why does he even try!? Why!?
(Jake Smith is able to get the shoulder up as the crowd cheers and claps in appreciation to the wrestling match these two have put on so far. Jake is down but not out as Banks looks up at the referee slapping his hands together for him to count faster. Banks grabs Jake by the hair and delivers a few stiff forearms before throwing him into the ropes…)
Stew-O: Banks with another Irish Whip, he runs at Jake, but Smith ducks as Banks attempted a flying clothesline, he gets back up and…. HE HOISTS BANKS UP AND A QUICK DEATH VALLEY DRIVER! JAKE WAS ABLE TO HIT THAT MOVE AND PUT BANKS DOWN BUT JAKE IS TOO HURT TO COVER! HE IS ROLLING IN PAIN ON THE MATS, SLOWLY GETTING BACK TO HIS FEET AND BANKS IS NOW UP TO HIS KNEES, WAIT A SECOND…. JAKE IS LOWERING THE KNEE PAD DOWN! HE SEES THE OPPORTUNITY AND…. SO LONG AND GOODNIGHT! THE KNEE TO THE BACK OF THE HEAD AND BANKS SEEMS TO BE OUT!
Persephone: YES! COVER HIM JAKE! COVER HIM! HE IS ON TOP AND WE HAVE A WINNER!
ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
TWO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
THREE…..
Persephone: HOW!? HOW DID THAT MAN KICK OUT!? THEY HAVE BEEN WRESTLING IN AN EXCESS OF ALMOST 15 MINUTES NOW!
(Jake Smith can’t believe it, he turns and looks up at the referee holding up three fingers, but he shakes it off and holds up 2. Jake sighs and looks down, slamming the mat with a fist before slowly getting back up to his feet, he has Banks up as well, whipping him into the turnbuckle, Jake charges in….)
Gavin Kirkland: Vicious back elbow by Jake and look what he is doing now, he lifts up Banks and hangs him upside down in the Tree of Woe! Banks is helpless and this is Jake’s idea of bondage, I love it! He circles the ring and runs at Banks… BASEMENT DROPKICK TO HIS FACE AND BANKS IS TOOK IT ALL WIOTHOUT A DEFENSE AND JAKE NOW SLOWLY CLIMBS TO THE TURNBUCKLE; BANKS IS TRYING TO SOMEHOW CLIMB UP! HE HAS THE ROPES TRYING TO PUSH HIMSELF UP AND ….. FOOTSTOMP TO THE CHEST! BANKS HEAD SNAPS AGAINST THE TURNBUCKLE AND THAT HAS TO BE IT! :whew:
Crowd: HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HIOLY SHIT!
(The referee is finally able to get the foot of Banks pried off the turnbuckle as he falls to the mats. Jake sees the opportunity and rolls Banks over….)
Persephone: He is dead, there is no kicking out of this! Yes…. Yes….. pin him please! We can finally end this show and go on to our normal lives!
ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
TWO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
THREE…….
Persephone: GFWOUYWGFYGFYIGQWD HGQFHGQDUGFYFGDQW!!!!!!
(The crowd erupts in cheers as Banks is able to get a shoulder up again and Jake Smith looks absolutely floored. He is sitting there wondering what is left to do….)
Stew-O: WHAT A MATCH SO FAR AND JAKE SMITH SI DUMBFOUNDED, HE DOESN’T KNOW HOW TO PUT BANKS AWAY! HE IS IN ABSOLUTE SHOCK RIGHT NOW OVER ALL OF THIS! JAKE IS LOOKING AROUND TRYING TO FIGURE OUT HOW TO PUT THIS MAN AWAY AND HE SLAMS THE MATS AGAIN, PICKS UP BANKS…. JNO BANKS HOISTS HIM UP ON HIS SHOULDERS! NO JAKE SNEAKS OUT FROM BEHIND AND PUSHES BANKS INTO THE ROPES, BUT BANKS IS ABLE TO GET A DISCUS LARIAT OUT OF IT AND JAKE DROPS TO THE MAT! BANKS COLLAPSES NEXT TO HIM THAT WAS THE BURST OF ENERGY AND NOW BOTH MEN FINDS THEMSELVES LAID OUT!
(The referee sees both competitors laid out and quickly starts the count….)
Referee: 1!…… 2!…….3!……4!……..5!……..
(Jake starts to stir, Banks gets a hold o f the ropes as he is attempting to get back to his feet. Jake is on all fours now….)
Referee: 6!….. 7!……8!…..9!…..
(Banks is on his feet and so is Jake, who charges in, and Banks reacts….)
Gavin Kirkland: HIGH KNEE AND IT HITS JAKE AS HE CHARGED IN! JAKE STUMBLES BACK AND BANKS HITS A SPEAR! HE ALMOST CUT JAKE IN HALF AND HOOKS THE LEGS FOR THE COVER! WE CAN GO ON THAT DATE NOW AFTER THIS PERSEPHONE! JUST CALL ME REX!
Persephone: Okay…. Creeper! COME ON BANKS! PIN HIM!
ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
TWO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
THREE…..
Persephone: This is torture… I mean it really is. Banks and Jake can’t win a match, I am sitting next to Gavin Kirkland, I mean seriously, this is absolutely terrible! Someone just win please! How much more can these guys take right here and especially Jake Smith who has already wrestled twice tonight, I mean come on! If Banks is such a legend than pin him already!
(Banks now looks a little frustrated, he seems to not have an answer for Jake Smith either as he slowly gets up and waits until Jake gets to his knees, he then backs up and runs at him ready to lay another knee….)
Stew-O: Banks charges in with that knee again, but this time Jake sits up and he misses, Banks hits the ropes and Jake hits a School Boy roll up on Banks!
ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
TWO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
TH….
Stew-O: BANKS IS ABLE TO KICK OUT AND HE GETS HIT WITH A SUPERKICK BY JAKE SMITH RIGHT IN HIS MOUTH! BANKS CRUMBLES TO THE MAT AND JAKE NOW GOES TO THE TOP ROPE, HE IS IN THE HIGH RENT DISTRICT! JAKE USUALLY DOESN’T DO THESE TYPE OF HIGH-RISK MANEUVERS AND FROG SPLASH ON BANKS! HE HIT IS ALL AND HOOKS THE LEG FOR THE COVER!
ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
TWO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
THREE……
Persephone: I don’t understand, I get the will, I get the way…. Actually, I don’t what the fuck!? Will somebody please just win!
Gavin Kirkland: Jake is trying everything now at this point. He doesn’t know what to do anymore! Neither does Banks. These are two studly men that have wrestled now for almost twenty minutes and neither one of them is budging. Banks is still down, and Jake mounts him, okay he is using closed fists and tempers are flaring, this is starting to get really good now! Yes! That is exactly what I was afraid of, and I love it, but see unlike Voltage and their garbage wrestling, we actually wrestle!
Persephone: Yeah and it’s boring!
(Jake Smith grabs Banks by the hair, up to his feet, unloading a few more forearms, before lifting Banks back up over her his shoulder….)
Stew-O: Shoulder breaker…. No! Banks is able to get behind Jake! Hooks his waist and GERMAN SUPLEX RELEASE! JAKE LANDS ON HIS BACK AND BANKS IS STILL HURTING WITH HIS NECK, IS BACK UP AND LIFTS UP JAKE…. QUICK SNAP SUPLEX INTO THE BANK VAULT! BANKS HAS THE ANACONDA VICE AND THIS ONE COULD BE OVER! WE HAVE SEEN HIM WIN SO MANY MATCHES WITH THIS MOVE! HE HAS HIM DOWN AND JAKE IS KICKING AND SCREAMING IN THE MIDDLE OF THE RING AND NOWHERE TO GO! HE HAS NOWHERE TO REACH, STUCK IN THE MIDDLE OF THE RING!
Persephone: TAP OUT JAKE, WE WON’T HATE YOU IF THAT HAPPENS, YOU ARE STILL A MAN IN OUR BOOKS….. BARELY BUT YOU ARE! TAP OUT JAKE! TAP OUT!
Gavin Kirkland: THERE IS NO ESCAPE AND JAKE SMITH IS DONE FOR! HE CAN’T HANDLE THIS ANYMORE! HE JUST CANNOT! PERSEPHONE, WHERE ARE WE GOING WHEN JAKE TAPS?
Persephone: :WTH:
(Jake is panicked and scrambling, trying anything and everything to reach out and try to find the ropes or a way to break the hold. The crowd is cheering as Banks has it locked tight….)
Crowd: THIS IS WRESTLING!!!!! THIS IS WRESTLING!!!!! THIS IS WRESTLING!!!!!
Steve-O: JAKE SMITH IS FADING NOW! EHE IS REFUSING TO TAP OUT BUT HE IS DEFINITELY FADING AND THERE IS NOTHING THAT JAKE SMITH CAN DO! WAIT… HE IS TRYING TO CRAWL AND PLANTED HIS FEET ON THE MATS! HE IS PUSHING HARD! BUT BANKS IS HOLDING ON…. JAKE WITH THE HEAD SCISSORS AND HE PUSHES BANKS BACK AND HAS HIM LOCKED! BUT BANKS FLIPS OUT OF THE HEADSCISSORS AND TRIES TO GO RIGHT BACK INTO THE VICE….
Persephone: THUMB TO THE EYE BY JAKE! FINALLY BEST MOVE OF THE NIGHT AND HE DID THAT OUT OF DESPERATION! WAIT…. JAKE LOCKS IN THE 505! HIS VERSION OF THE ANACONDA LOCK AND NOW BANKS IS LOCKED IN AND LISTEN TO HIS SCREAMS, I LOVE IT! MUSIC TO MY DAMN EARS!
(Jake now has the Anaconda Vice locked in on Banks as the crowd has erupted. The arena is deafening as Banks now is the one panicked and doesn’t know what to do, reaching for anything to grab on to, trying to force the palm of his hand on the face of Jake but he ties that arm too…..)
Stew-O: OH, HE IS DIALED IN! RONN BANKS IS TIED UP IN THE VICE AND THERE IS NO WAY THAT HE WILL BE ABLE TO BREAK OUT OF THIS! HE IS LOOKING TO TAP OUT! BANKS IS DESPERATELY LOOKING TO GET OUT BUT JAKE NOW SCREAMS AS HE HOLDS THE VICE AND BANKS HAS NOWHERE TO GO! BUT BANKS IS ABLE TO GET HIS PALM UNDER THE CHIN OF JAKE! HE IS PRESSING UP ON HIM AND WAIT…. HE IS PUSHING JAKE’S HEAD BACK!
Persephone: HOLD ON TO IT JAKE! DO NOT GIVE IT UP! DO NOT LET HIM ESCAPE! DO THIS FOR US! FOR VOLTAGE! FOR ME!
Gavin Kirkland: Banks is starting to fade again! He…. NO! Banks pushes Jake’s head into his own version of the head scissors, but he kips up! Jake KICKS BANKS SQUARE IN THE FACE WITH ANOTHER SUPERKICK! JAKE IS ALL OVER HIM LIKE THE EGYPTIAN WOMEN ARE ON ME! HE PICKS UP BANKS, KICK TO THE MIDSECTION, BOUNCING OFF THE ROPES AND ANOTHER BROKEN WINGS! HE ATTACKS THE NECK! JAKE THOUGH IS NOT MAKING THE COVER, HE WANTS TO PUT THE EXCLAMATION POINT ON THE MATCH, THIS IS EXCITING!
Persephone: It is not exciting; it is drawn out! Will they just finish this all so we can go home please!
(Jake Smith looks at the crowd and picks up Banks but suddenly, Banks rakes the eyes of Jake Smith as the crowd cheers, by now both men have already lost their cool and they are doing whatever they want now. )
Stew-O: Jake was blinded, and he is trying to see… WALKING INTO A ROUNDHOUSE KICK AND JAKE DOESN’T FALL, STANDING ON HIS FEET AND HERE COMES BANKS… DEDEDE DDT! AND JAKE SMITH IS OUT AND THIS ONE IS OVER!
Persephone: YES!
ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
TWO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
THREE……….
Persephone: HOW!!? NO! NO! NO! HOW DID JAKE SMITH KICK OUT!
(The crowd once again erupts in cheers…..)
Crowd: THIS IS AWESOME!!!! THIS IS AWESOME!!!!! THIS IS AWESOME!!!!
Stew-O: RONN BANKS IS AT A LOSS RIGHT NOW! HE CANNOT BELIEVE THAT JAKE SMITH WAS ABLE TO KICK OUT OF THAT AND IS STILL ALIVE IN THE MATCH! HE IS STILL ABLE TO CONTINUE WHICH IS HUGE FOR JAKE SMITH!
(Banks sits there staring at Jake Smith who is on the mat lying there trying to catch his breath. He is stupefied at what is happening right now. Slowly getting up, Banks stands over Jake Smith who is now crawling at his feet, slowly trying to push his way up….)
Gavin Kirkland: Wait…. Is Banks actually looking down at Jake Smith with respect!? He is looking at him the way he looks at me!
Persephone: Nobody respects you, Gavin, shut up! Banks just needs to pick him up, bash him in the head and be done with this once and for all that is what needs to happen right now… like right now!
(Banks allows Jake to get up slowly, while crawling up his boot, finally Banks grabs him by the hair….)
Stew-O: GO TO RETIREMENT…. NO! JAKE SMITH IS ABLE TO FALL BEHIND BANKS! HE TURNS INTO A KICK TO THE MIDSECTION…. HELL ABOVE THE FLIP PILEDRIVER AND BANKS IS DOWN BUT JAKE PICKS HIM BACK UP AND STARMAKER!!!! HE HIT THE STARMAKER AND THIS ONE IS OVER!
Persephone: FINALLY!
ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
TWO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
THREE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
…..
……
……
Persephone: HOW IN THE HELL!?!?!?! BANKS WITH A SHOULDER UP AND BOTH JAKE AND I ARE SITTING HER WITH OUR MOUTHS WIDE OPEN!? HOW!?!?!?!?!??!
(The crowd cannot contain themselves. These two men are fighting with their hearts on the sleeve as they both lie there, Jake doesn’t know what else to do, he glares up at the ceiling wondering what he has to do to finish Banks. Slowly Jake is back up…..)
Gavin Kirkland: HE IS GOING TO FINISH THIS OFF ONCE AND FOR ALL! HE GRABS BANKS FOR ANOTHER STARMAKER…. AND NO! BANKS REVERSES IT ON INSTINCT…. THESE TWO MANLY MEN ARE PUTTING ON A DISPLAY AND HE GRABS JAKE….. BANKS WITH A STARMAKER OF HIS OWN AND HE PLANTS JAKE WITH HIS OWN MOVE! JAKE SMITH IS DOWN AND BANKS JUMPS ON HIM FOR THE COVER!
Persephone: PLEASE!!!!!
ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
TWO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
THREE…….
Persephone: I give up!
Stew-O: KICK OUT BY JAKE SMITH AND RONN BANKS FINALLY HAS HAD ENOUGH! HE GRABS JAKE AND THROWS HIM INTO THE TURNBUCKLE, RUNNING UP AND KNEEING HIM IN THE FACE, BULLDOG COMBINATION! RONN BANKS HAS FINALLY TURNED THIS INTO MORE OF A DESPERATION THAN ANYTHING! BANKS IS NOT GOING FOR THE COVER! HE POINTS TO THE CROWD IN EGYPT AS THEY CONTINUE TO CHEER. BANKS SLAMS THE MATS AGAIN AND GRABS JAKE, HAMMERLOCKS AND BUTTERFLY SUPLEX!
(Banks sits up, holding his neck. He then is unrelenting, grabbing Jake again and this time picking him up over his shoulder and to the turnbuckle, sitting Jake back up, he climbs to the second rope, and then to the top rope….)
Persephone: I’m fine with both of them dying too, just saying! As they are up on the top rope! This doesn’t look safe, it looks like Banks is trying for a belly to belly., oh this would be nice! They continue to juggle each other on the top rope…. And Banks tries to get that Belly to Belly but Jake Smith….wait he headbutts Banks not once but twice…. He teeters on the ropes and JAKE SOMEHOW REVERSES AND SPINS INTO THE BELLY TO BELLY OF HIS OWN!
(The crowd screams in cheers….)
Crowd: HOLY SHIT!!!!! HOLY SHIT!!!!! HOLY SHIT!!!!!
Stew-O: BOTH MEN CRASHED AND BURNED! AND JAKE IS ACTUALLY TURNING ON BANKS FOR THE COVER!
ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
TWO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
THREE……
Stew-O: NOOOOO! BANKS KICKS OUT AGAIN AND PERSEPHONE IS ABOUT TO PULL HER HAIR OUT! JAKE SLOWLY GETS UP GRABBING BANKS AS THEY BOTH CAN BARELY STAND; JAKE SETS HIM UP FOR ANOTHER FLIP PILEDRIVER! HE HAS AND JUMS FOR THE EXECUTION…. NO! BANKS HOLDS HIM MID FLIP AND HITS THE ALABAMA SLAM! THE TORQUE AND FORCE BEHIND IT LAID OUT JAKE SMITH BUT BANKS FALLS, HE CAN’T STAND UP AS THE FATIGUE, THE PAIN, YOU CAN SEE THE NECK IS REALLY BOTHERING HIM!
Persephone: He’s old! I’m surprised that his hip hasn’t gone out yet! I would have thought by now he wouldn’t be able to walk! Someone needs to drug test this old fart!
(Both men are laid out in the middle of the ring, they are gassed, hurt, and can barely continue but Banks is the first to sit up as Jake turns his body, obviously hurting bad, slowly getting up, Jake is on his fours, Banks runs and kicks him in the midsection, again and again….)
Gavin Kirkland: Banks wants to make sure that Jake vomits his lunch out! He is kicking that man over and over and it is not very nice!
Persephone: Are you serious right now!? He should be kicking his head in instead! Come on Banks do better! Seriously…. Do better!
Stew-O: Banks is tired, he’s hurt just like Jake and right now what he wants is to wear him down even more before going for the kill! Banks and Jake have been putting on a clinic this entire match and he has tried everything to put him away! Banks picks Jake up by the hair and he runs against the ropes, SHINING WIZARD! JAKE GOES DOWN AND BANKS WITH A SURGE OF ENERGY RUNS UP THE ROPES….. MOONSAULT ON JAKE SMITH AND HE HOOKS THE LEG FOR THE COVER!
ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
TWO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
THREE……
Persephone: They are not human…. They can’t be human! JAKE SMITH KICKS OUT AGAIN!? HOW DID HE KICK OUT AGAIN!? I CAN’T ANYMORE….. I REALLY CAN’T!
(Banks again is in disbelief but claps his hands and grabs Jake on the way up to his feet, muscling him up over his shoulder….)
Stew-O: THIS COULD FINALLY BE IT! HE HAS HIM WEAKENED ENOUGH TO BE ABLE AND PULL THE MOVE BUT…. NO! JAKE IS FIGHTING FOR HIS LIFE. CONSTANT ELBOW AFTER ELBOW ON THE FACE OF BANKS CAUSING HIM TO LET GO, AND JAKE GETS BEHIND BANKS….. STARMAKER!
Persephone: FINALLY! PIN HIM JAKE!
Stew-O: THE STARMAKER HITS BUT JAKE HANGS ON! FLIPPING BACK TO HIS FEET AGAIN… ANOTHER STARMAKER! HE PLANTED BANKS AGAIN BUT JAKE IS TURNING HANGING ON FOR ONE LAST ONE…. STARMAKER! JAKE SMITH IS ABOUT TO BECOME THE LEGEND KILLER ONCE AGAIN! TO REACH UP AND PART THE CLOUDS SO HE COULD HAVE ONE MORE DAY OF SUNSHINE! THE CROWD IS GOING BALLISTIC AND THEY COUNT WITH JAKE!
ONE!!!!!!!!!!!! ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
TWO!!!!!!!!!!!!! TWO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
THREE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THREE!!!!!!!!!
…
….
…..
…..
Gavin Kirkland: BANKS HAS HIS FOOT ON THE ROPES AND THE REFEREE SEES IT! BANKS FOOT IS ON THE ROPES AND LOOK AT JAKE SMITH! HE IS BESIDE HIMSELF RIGHT NOW! LOOK AT HIS FACE, I ALMOST FEEL SORRY FOR JAKE! HE DRAGS BANKS FROM THE ROPES AND GOES FOR THE PIN!
ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
TWO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
THREE……
Persephone: He gets the shoulder up, of course he does! JAKE DO IT AGAIN IN THE MIDDLE OF THE RING! JAKE IS DRAGGING HIM UP AND WHIPS HIM INTO THE TURNBUCKLE, JAKE CHARGING IN AND BANKS GETS OUT OF THE WAY AT THE LAST SECOND AND JAKE CRASHES INTO THE STEEL POST! WHAT A DUMBASS!
(Jake falls over the ropes and Banks grabs him from behind, but he goes for a DDT….)
Stew-O: JAKE THROWS HIM OFF AND BANKS LANDS FACE FIRST! HE IS HURT AND JAKE PICKS UP BANKS OVER HIS SHOULDER…. NO! TRHE WEIGHT WAS TOO MUCH, JAKE HAD TO DROP HIM BUT AS BANKS GETS UP, JAKE HOPS ON THE SECOND ROPE, HE SIGNALS FOR THE HELL ABOVE…. BANKS BUM RUSHES THE TURNBUCKLE AND JAKE HOPS OFF, BANKS TURNS RIGHT INTO A SUPERKICK AND FALLS TO THE CORNER! JAKE QUICKLY PICKS HIM IP SETTING BANKS ON THE TOP….
SLAP!
Persephone: Jake just bitch slapped Banks! He climbs to the ropes and now Jake is going to the very top…. And…. And…. HE WANTS TO PILEDRIVE HIM FROM THE TOP ROPE! HE WANTS TO FINALLY ENDS THIS AND JAKE GOES FOR IT…. NO! BANKS HANGS ON AND FOREARM AFTER FOREARM! HE IS FIGHTING FOR HIS LIFE AND JAKER IS STUNNED…. WAIT BANKS HOOKS THE ARMS….. YES! PEPSI PLUNGE! HE JUST HIT THE PEPSI PLUNGE AND THIS ONE IS DONE! THANK YOU!!!!
ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
TWO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
THREE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
…..
……
……
Gavin Kirkland: Jake kicked out? JAKE SMITH KICKED OUT AND THE FANS ARE SHOCKED!
Crowd: HOLY SHIT!!!!! HOLY SHIT!!!!!! HOLY SHIT!!!!!!
Stew-O: BANKS FACE SAYS IT ALL AND HE IS BACK UP, PICKING UP JAKE SMITH OVER HIS SHOULDERS! HE IS FINALLY GOING TO HIT THE GO TO RETIREMENT….. NO JAKE IS TRYING TO FIGHT OUT OF IT AND HE LANDS ON HIS FEET BUT BANKS HITS A JUMPING KNEE STUNNING JAKE, PICKING HIM BACK UP AND HITS GO TO RETIREMENT!!!!!! BANKS HOOKS THE LEG FOR THE COVER!!!
ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
TWO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
THREE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(DING!!! DING!!! DING!!!)
Bella Braxton: HERE IS YOUR WINNER…… RONN BANKS!!!!
(“Shock The World” by Lloyd Banks plays throughout the stadium as Banks and Jake both lie in the middle of the ring while the crowd is up to their feet giving this a standing ovation. Both wrestlers gave it their all but in the end, Ronn Banks was able to survive. The referee lifts banks arm up signaling victory…)
Stew-O: WHAT A MATCH AND WHAT A MAIN EVENT WE HAD HERE AT BATTLE OF EGYPT! TWO WRESTLERS THAT WALKED IN HERE AND GAVE IT THEIR ALL. IF RONN BANKS DIDN;’T RESPECT JAKE SMITH BEFORE, HE SURE RESPECTS HIM NOW! THESE TWO PUT EVERYTHING ON THE LINE…. WHAT A WAY TO END BATTLE OF EGYPT III: ALEXANDRIA FALLS!
Persephone: I am just so happy that it is over, and we don’t have to worry about it anymore. Sure, they had their match, whatever, the fans are happy, it is what it is, cool. Let’s move on now. Can we cut the feed now so we can leave?
Gavin Kirkland: Unfortunately, there was only one Women’s Match tonight, but it was six of the best and Andrea was out here watching, so ending it on a sausage fest is fine with me, these are two studs and came out to put a great match on, but Persephone is right, goodnight everybody!
(Banks is sitting back up, barely able to get back to his feet, Jake rolls out and is resting on the ropes as medical staff and officials are checking on him and helping Jake on the outside. Banks with the help of the referee gets up and he raises his arms in victory again, before pointing to Jake Smith and clapping as the fans clap with him in appreciation for his efforts….)
Stew-O: We are not going anywhere and definitely a sigh of respect here between two wrestlers that put it all on the line tonight. They had some heated words between the two this past week, but this match proved just how good they are and why Ronn Banks is a Hall of Famer and Jake Smith is a future oner for sure.
Persephone: Okay… that’s nice. Can we go now.
(Ronn Banks is able to climb to the second rope and raise his hands in the air. Jake Smith looks up as he is being escorted and assisted to the back as he is clearly hurt. The crowd continues to cheer on Banks as he drops down…..)
Stew-O: …. THE LAST SEDATION! XANDER PAYNE OUT OF NOWHERE AND HE JUST PLANTED RONN BANKS ON THE MAT! WHAT THE HELL IS THIS ALL ABOUT!?
Persephone: :comeagain:
Gavin Kirkland: Wait… what!?
(Xander Payne stands over Ronn Banks as he then rolls out of the ring and drags Ronn Banks outside with him….)
Stew-O: XANDER PAYNE JUST IRISH WHIPPED RONN BANKS INTO THE STEEL POST! BANKS HITS WITH A SICKENING THUD! BUT XANDER PAYNE IS RELNTLESS HERE AND GRABS BANKS, HE4 IS GOING TO THE TIMEKEEPER’S TABLE, HE GRABS THE BELL…..
DING!!!!!
DING!!!!!
DING!!!!!
Stew-O: XANDER IS SMASHING THE BELL OVER THE HEAD OF BANKS REPEATEDLY! HE IS SPLIT OPEN! BLOOD POURING EVERYWHERE AND LOOK AT XANDER! HE IS ROLLING THE MAT OFF THE FLOOR TO EXPOSE THE CONCRET! XANDER…. STOP DAMN IT!
Gavin Kirkland: HE IS GOING TO KILL BANKS!
Persephone: ISN’T THERE LAWS TO PROTECT SENIORS FROM THIS TYPE OF ASSAULT!?
(Xander Payne stands over the concrete floor, hoists him up…..)
Stew-O: OH NO…. XANDER PAYNE JUST EXECUTED THE PAYNEKILLER ON RONN BANKS ON THE EXPOSED CONCRETE AND HE IS OUT!
Persephone: He is twitching like a fish out of water!
Stew-O: DAMN IT WHY!? XANDER WHY!? HE WAS JUST NAMED INTO THE HALL OF FAME! XANDER IS NOT DONE, HE PICKS UP THE DEAD WEIGHT OF BANKS AND ROLLS HIM BACK INTO THE RING, HE LOCKS HIM IN ILLUMINATION! COME ON! BANKS IS UNCONSCIOUS!
(Xander after a few seconds breaks the hold and slams the face of Banks to the mat leaving a huge blood smear. He then stands up and looks down at Banks laid out motionless at his feet.)
Stew-O: WHAT DOES THIS MEAN FOR RONN BANKS AFTER AN INCREDIBLE VICTORY AND SHOW TONIGHT! WE HAVE A NEW NUMBER ONE CONTENDER FOR THE UNIVERSAL WOMEN’S CHAMPIONSHIP, TITLES CHANGED, AND THE ROAD TO PAIN FOR PRIDE IS ON FULL SPEED…. BUT DID WE JUST WITNESS RONN BANKS ROAD TO PAYNE FOR PRIDE! FOR GAVIN KIRKLAND AND PERSEPHONE…. THANK YOU FOR JOINING US EAW UNIVERSE…. GOODNIGHT FROM EGYPT!
(The final scene is Xander Payne shaking, glaring down at a bloodied Ronn Banks.)
(EAW Logo Buzzes)
